Honestly, Eunto wasn't sure just what he was trying to prove -- all he knew was that he was sick and tired of being left out of pick-up Yooyuball games and Gormball competitions just because he wasn't fast enough or because his legs were too short. He'd been so upset that he'd even considered buying a Morphing Potion, but he hadn't been able to scrape together the Neopoints. Instead, Eunto just snatched up all of the cheapest potions he could find, plus some Spooky Food that he'd heard Sophie the Swamp Witch used in her spells.

"If Dr. Sloth can formulate a Transmogrification Potion to make Grundos big and strong, there's no reason I can't do the same," Eunto murmured, the sweat beading on his forehead as he tipped the potion bottles into the elaborate glass tubing he had set up in his lab. "Maybe he's a doctor, but so what? I've been studying in my lab for years now -- it's practically the same thing!"

The potions blended together, forming a dung-coloured solution that slid sluggishly through the tubes and beakers on the lab table. Hissing jets of steam shot out from the tubes, and the room was filled with the stench of rotten chokatoes and mouldy cheese. Eunto rubbed his hands together in anticipation and was tempted to let out a peal of maniacal laughter.

When the solution finally stopped bubbling, the Gnorbu carefully drained it into a large beaker. Sure, it looked vile and smelled even worse, but it was the answer to all of his hopes. No making a deal with a shady Krawk for this Gnorbu. He was going to show everyone just how strong and athletic he could be, all on his own.

Eunto took a deep breath, tilted his head back, and gulped the potion down. At first, nothing happened, apart from his mouth tasting awful. Disgusted and angry, Eunto hurled the beaker across the room. "No! After all of my work!" he cried, squeezing his eyes shut to force back his tears of frustration.

When he opened his eyes again, though, he saw...

The lower half of his body was elongated, his legs stretching three times longer than before. It was as if a super-sized Greeble's body had been attached to his own.

As he examined himself further, he found his midsection was still that of a Gnorbu, but his arms! Oh, his arms! They were thick and strong, like an Elephante's, but with the claws of a Grarrl. It was everything he could hope for!

Eunto stopped there, because he didn't have a mirror, but it didn't matter. With features like these, his head must've been an amazing sight to behold. His dream had come true!

The eager Gnorbu paused, unsure of what to do. Should he go play all of the games he had been forced to sit out, or laugh at all the Neopets who were shorter than him now? Laughing, he stretched to his full height.

Suddenly, his head bumped against the ceiling, and he flinched. Stopping to gather his breath, he fell into a fit of laughter, unable to stop himself. Holding onto the wall to steady himself, he moved toward the door.

When he reached the entrance, his laughter was cut short. The Gnorbu gaped in amazement. He was too tall for the archway!

Crouching as much as possible, Eunto managed to duck through. He made his way through the house, not even glancing at the mirrors. Bursting out onto the street, he once again straightened to his tallest and looked down.

But it wasn't the smiling faces of his neighbours that greeted him, it was...

"E-E-E-Eunto!" the Korbat stammered, his blue wings fluttering nervously behind him. "Y-you... y-your f-f-face...."

Altim had a nervous disposition at the best of times, and after witnessing such a magnificent metamorphosis, Eunto thought it was no wonder he'd been left nearly speechless. Why, such a new, improved Gnorbu as he was couldn't be anything but a glory to behold. All right, he'd hoped to find admiring onlookers already crowded at his gate, but it was good to see his friend, too.

In fact, this situation couldn't be better! Altim, like Eunto, was always picked last for sports. Thin and weedy, he was no good at tending the goal. In fact, his wings looked like they'd snap if he so much as tried to stop a speeding Yooyu. Nor was he fast enough to keep up in flying races, and to suggest he ran would have been a joke. No Korbat was cut out for running, and especially not Altim.

Luckily, Eunto knew he could change all that. Ducking his (strangely heavy -- it must be a side effect of taking the potion) head back under the door, he reached out one of his fantastic new muscular arms out and dragged his victim... uh, his friend inside with one Grarrl-like claw.

"No need to be in awe, Altim. I know, I've gone from a good-for-nothing Gnorbu to a spectacular specimen of sportiness. You don't have to tell me how incredible I look." Eunto thought this statement over for a moment, and added, "Although you can, if you want. The best part is that I've got enough potion left to make you just like me! I mean, if I'm like this, imagine how you'll turn out. You'll have wings so big and strong you'll be able to carry passengers when you fly!"

"N-N-N-NO! EUNTO!" the Korbat yelled, squirming in the vice-like grip. Of course, he was just being silly.

In fact, Altim was trembling all over, although it was probably with joy, Eunto imagined, as he raised the glass beaker to his friend's face. The poor, jittery Korbat would never be brave or clever enough to ask to be transformed the way Eunto had. That was why the Gnorbu was going to have to make this decision for him. "Just hold still, it won't taste as bad as it smells," he reassured, "Now open wide and..."

The Korbat ducked, just a moment too late to avoid the stream of noxious potion as it splashed toward his mouth. Above him, however, Eunto had stopped moving altogether. In the steamy glass of the window, the mutant Gnorbu had just caught sight of his own face....

It was hideous.

His previously yellow fur was now a strange, sickly shade of tannish brown that twisted into matted, scraggly clumps, leaving some patches of his skin bare. His ears were gigantic, and seemed to be almost webbed. A third eye blinked dolefully at him from his forehead.

His jaw fell open in horror, revealing even more horror -- a row of crooked, viciously jagged teeth.

He'd given himself legs the length of a Lenny's. Arms like those of an Elephante, and a Grarrl's claws.

And from the looks of it, the changes hadn't stopped there. The eyes of a mutant Usul, the teeth of a Skeith...

"No," was all he managed to rasp.

Behind him, Altim spluttered as he tried to spit out the foul elixir from his mouth. At one point, he must have swallowed, because he gagged as the slimy mixture slid down his throat.

And then he let out a shocked cry, and Eunto tore his gaze away from the mirror to watch Altim rear back as two more sets of wings pushed their way out of his back. His short, arrowheaded tail lengthened into a curly, furrier version, reminiscent of a Mynci's. His arms were thickening, and two antennae were pushing themselves out of his head like vines twisting toward the sun...

Seemingly exhausted, the Korbat slumped to the floor, panting and gasping.

"What have I done?" the Gnorbu wailed. For a second, panic threatened to overtake him, and then his scientist's mind took over.

"I need to fix this," Eunto muttered, looking down and wringing his new, powerful arms. "Restore us and then try again. I need to find a counter to those ingredients before this gets any worse."

And then the door behind him creaked open...

"You there!" he called imperiously at Eunto and Altim. "Which of you mutant laboratory rejects is the Gnorbu who bought up half of my stock two hours ago?"

Eunto stared at the Bruce, whom he recognised as the Spooky Foods shopkeeper.

"Uh..." he said, then lifted a claw, "that would have been me."

"I see," said the Bruce, and for a moment a look of pity flashed on his face, which was then replaced by mirth. "Haha, my friend! You are some kind of ugly."

"I know," said Eunto, and his mutant Usul eyes filled with tears. "I know!" Next to him, Altim hid his face behind his quadruple wings and shook with sobs.

"Hm," said the Spooky Foods shopkeeper, who seemed to be at a loss for words because of the sheer wretchedness of the pitiable spectacle before him. "You left too quickly for me to warn you adequately: you need to be careful when dabbling in Spooky magic. It is generally best left to the likes of Sophie the Swamp Witch, or Edna -- or myself..."

The Bruce paused, and he folded his wings together and smirked. "But that is not the reason I pursued you to your house," he added. "I'm here because you paid me short. You owe me ten Neopoints."

All three of Eunto's mutant Usul eyes twitched -- which was quite a remarkable sight in itself -- and he grabbed the little Bruce and gave him a shake.

"Look at us! Do you think ten Neopoints matter right now?"

"Erm," choked out the Bruce, “on second thought, maybe I'll let you slide this time..."

"Forget it," said Eunto. "You're going to help us get back to normal!"

Beside him, Altim seemed to come back to life. "Yes," he squeaked, and his new antennae suddenly stood alertly on his head. "You'd know how to set this right!"

The Bruce flapped his wings madly, but Eunto's grip on his bowtie was inexorable. "All right," he gasped at length, "I'll help you."

Eunto dropped the shopkeeper, who breathed hard and then rearranged his bowtie for the longest time.

"Well?" prompted Eunto, "what do we have to do?"

"First, we need to reconstruct what you used, you silly Gnorbu," said the Bruce grumpily. "Then we can determine how to reverse the potion's effects."

Eunto enumerated his ingredients -- or what he remembered of them -- and as he did, the Spooky Foods shopkeeper waddled back and forth in front of Eunto's workbench, collecting bits and pieces together. "Quite a nice laboratory you have here, nice setup, full set of ingredients..." he commented in passing, and he gave Eunto a sidelong glance. "Very nice."

"Rancid cheese is countered by fresh Kau Kau Farm Milk," he continued. "Chokato is reversed by Fava Beans, a Slimesicle is countered by Spooky Gopplecream..."

Eunto and Altim watched the Bruce cram these items into the elaborate glass structure that Eunto had first used to make his ill-planned potion.

But neither of them spotted the Bruce pick up a large, quivering chunk of Poisonous Jelly...

The two twistedly transformed Neopets followed the Bruce closely, eager to resume their normal shapes. Each placing of the ingredients on the counter sent shivers down what used to be their spines.

As soon as all the ingredients were arranged to his liking, the Bruce set a suspiciously full bag down beside him. "First things first."

Eunto leaned nearer, and Altim quivered impatiently.

"I need something to mash the ingredients with, quickly," the shopkeeper said.

The former Korbat and Gnorbu started to move in opposite directions, searching for the pestle, and the Bruce started to put ingredients in.

Two Evil Snowballs, one Spooky Doughnut, a slice of --

"Found it!" shouted Altim, and the mutated Neopet rushed over, the piston-shaped object clutched in his hands.

"Here," he panted, out of breath. Altim dropped the tool into the Bruce's hands, and the shopkeeper set to work.

Mashing the ingredients with a practised hand, it didn't take long for the mixture to be a finely ground powder. "Almost done," he said, and a mischievous gleam filled his eye. "I just need a cup of water and three Gnorbu hairs," he finished.

Altim immediately rushed for the water, and Eunto lumbered off toward his hairbrush. The Bruce edged toward the bag, planning to slip his special ingredient inside, and he reached toward the opening.

"Got it!" Altim shouted excitedly, rushing back over with the water, and startling the Bruce. He jerked with surprise, causing the top of the bag to fall down, and its contents were revealed...

Inside the bag were several plump, grey, red-vested Evil Neggs.

"Oh, fiddlesticks," muttered the Bruce angrily.

"You... you were going to put those wicked things into the potion!" cried Eunto accusingly.

"Yeah, yeah, so what if I was? It's a vital part of the potion to turn you back to normal, so--"

"No, that can't be right!" Eunto cried. "I did at least a little research on Spooky Magic, and I know that you're never supposed to mix those Neggs into a potion along with Gnorbu hairs, or else... or else..." Eunto suddenly blanked on whatever it was happened if one mixed the two incompatible ingredients together. "...or else something bad happens," he finished lamely.

The Bruce rolled his eyes. "Come on. I'm an expert here, and I don't take kindly to having amateurs questioning my competence! Remember who got you into this mess? That's right, you. If you couldn't do the research to figure out what mixing all of those potions together was going to do, then what makes you think you know what happens when you mix Evil Neggs and Gnorbu hairs? I'll tell you what happens: you get changed back to your regular Gnorbu self, that's what happens. Now give me those last few ingredients!"

The Bruce didn't wait for Altim or Eunto to comply, but simply snatched the water and hairs right out of their hands, mixed the ingredients (including several large slices of Evil Negg) together thoroughly, and poured them into an empty potion bottle.

The concoction bubbled and foamed, sending out puffs of sickly grey-green smoke. Eunto hadn't thought it possible that a potion could smell worse than the one he'd mixed up earlier, but he discovered that he was wrong on that account. He made a face as he looked at the potion.

"I really don't think--" the mutated Gnorbu started.

"You mean like you didn't think before force-feeding me your rotten potion?" cried Altim. "Look, you can stay a mutated freak forever if you want to, but I'm going to drink the potion and change back!" Fluttering forward, the Korbat took the bottle from the Bruce, not noticing the glint of wicked glee in the shopkeeper's eyes, and drank several large gulps. Altim made a face. "Ugh, that tastes terri--"

The Korbat broke off midsentence.

His extra two wings melted back into his sides, his antennae retracted, and his tail and arms reformed themselves into their proper shapes.

"Oh." Eunto looked at the shopkeeper with embarrassment. "I guess you were right; the potion works after all..."

"It most certainly does," said the Bruce with a cruel smirk on his face. "It works perfectly..."

Just then, Eunto noticed the blank, mindless expression on the Korbat's face...

The Bruce's eyes lit up with the utmost amount of joy. "I've done it! I've done it!" he screamed, leaping up and waving his arms madly. "Finally, I have completed the spell!" He spun to face Eunto, grinning maniacally. "I was only missing one ingredient... Gnorbu hairs."

The mutant Gnorbu's nose wrinkled backward, and he snapped, "You fiend!"

"Were you any different?" the Bruce murmured, sauntering over to Altim. "Now, my darling, I have a mission for you."

"Yes, Master," the Korbat replied monotonously, his body rising into the air slowly. The Bruce leaned over and said something inaudible to the Korbat, and Altim began to slink away without another thought. Eunto leapt toward his friend, his huge muscular arms pinning down the Korbat with ease. Altim's head swiveled all the way backward and his lips peeled back; blood came from his mouth as he hissed and screeched, writhing under the weight of the giant creature.

"Altim! I am sorry I got you into this," Eunto stammered, tears forming in his three eyes. Alas, the possessed Korbat wouldn't hear him. It ripped away from his grasp and fluttered out of the room.

After a moment, Eunto spun around to face the shopkeeper, and to his surprise...

"You won't get away with this," the Gnorbu cried, shaking one lumpen, over-sized fist with rage. He could use his newly gained strength to crush the shopkeeper right now, but then who would help him turn back to normal? Most importantly, he had to find some way to save Altim from the zombie-like state the second potion had left him in. No matter how good revenge might feel, Eunto knew he couldn't abandon his friend to that fate. "You won't! I won't let you."

"Oh, I think you will." The Bruce smirked and continued his transformation. It was almost like watching another mutation take place. From the plump curve of his stomach, two green paws appeared, then two green legs kicked their way free from his tail. His voice had heightened noticeably when he added, "In fact, I don't even think I'll need a potion to make you do anything I say."

Finally the Bruce-costume fell in a black and white puddle to the floor, and Eunto found out just who had really been 'helping' him find an antidote to his potion.

"Sophie!" Eunto gasped, and the Ixi witch grinned back at him, taking a small bow.

"Of course. Do you really think a shopkeeper from that Deserted Fairground could make potions to rival mine? Nothing they sell there works. Haven't you ever played the Bagatelle?"

The mutated Gnorbu was still gaping at Sophie, trying to connect the dots in his mind and make sense of what had happened that afternoon. "What... but then why did you do that to Altim? He was my friend!"

"Oh, the Korbat will be fine. I put a temporary submission charm on him to scare you, but it will wear off before the evening's out. I just sent him off to do my grocery shopping." Once again Sophie smiled, but the bright expression faded quickly as she advanced on Eunto. "As for you, I hope you've learned your lesson when it comes to meddling in things you don't understand. What you did could have been a hundred times worse with one pinch of the wrong ingredient. You could have done something even I couldn't fix!"

The witch nodded her head in response to Eunto's eager expression. "Yes, I can fix what you did to yourself. First, I'm afraid you're going to have to do one thing for me..."

Sophie frowned. "Oh, no. I'm not letting you off so easily, especially not when the Korbat's already playing Fetch! for me. Good graciousness, no. What I have in mind is something a little more... eh..." She tapped her chin thoughtfully, trying to find the right adjective, and then shrugged.

The Gnorbu couldn't help it. A cold chill trickled down his spine. A little more what? Terrifying? Torturous? Excruciatingly painful or difficult?

"Oh, it's not that bad," Sophie said almost cheerfully, seeing Eunto's pale face. "It could be better, but then again, it could be a lot, lot worse. Imagine if you were at the mercy of, say, Ilere. Or Mr. Krawley."

Nodding ever so slightly, Eunto wondered exactly what Sophie wanted him to do, but was too afraid of the eccentric Swamp Witch to actually ask.

"It's not that bad of a request, so I have no idea why you're worried. I may be a witch, but I don't have any record of being particularly mean, vile, or nasty in any which way." A mildly bemused look drifted into Sophie's eyes before she shrugged it off. "Anyway, I want you to become my apprentice."

All three of Eunto's eyes blinked. Once. Twice. Three times. "You're joking," he finally said.

The Ixi scowled. "Everyone says that whenever I say something particularly clever. But why not? I could use help brewing my potions -- there's just so much that needs to be done now that Neovia's returned to life -- and your potion-making skills -- while certainly pathetic, erratic, and rudimentary -- are still teachable. I assume your goal was to become an athlete? You still did manage to do that, I suppose, even given the... er... side effects."

"So, then, if I say yes, you'll reverse the effects of my potion?" Eunto asked eagerly.

"Yes."

"If I say yes, will you reverse the effects right away?"

"...No."

Eunto's face fell.

"Think of it this way. You be my apprentice for... oh... let's go with ten years..."

"One," Eunto said.

Smirking slightly, the Swamp Witch shook her head. "You're in no position to haggle. Ten years, or not at all. And after ten years, if you've learned your lesson, maybe I'll give you your Gnorbu-ness back."

Eunto considered it. And then he shook his head. No, no more of this obsession with his outer appearance. He wasn't getting into any more trouble on account of his vanity. "Um... I'm going to say no."

"Well, it's your face." Sophie shook her head sadly, but something about her seemed to smile as she breezed out the door, no doubt to collect her groceries from Altim.

And on the table, she'd left a small, corked potion bottle, with a tag that read Yellow Gnorbu Morphing Potion.

The End.