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BRUCE DAY SPECIAL
All About Bruces
Born from Terror Mountain
At home in sleet or snow
As for our feathered friends
It's time for you to know!
They live to move their feet
Dance with all their might
Also have quite a strong arm
As seen in snowball fights
Crazy for tasty Chia pops
Champions on the ice rink
Competing comes naturally
Means much to them I think
Even with an ample waistline
They're confident as ever
Determined to do the best
Some are really rather clever
Warm-hearted from inside
By many they're adored
Bruces have a happy day!
There's more for you in store
Ramtor: The Baneful Bruce Wizard
A cry lurches out but is quickly muffled
Its origin? A citizen of Meridell humbled
Ramtor, the overtaker, who usurped King Skarl
Glares at the offending who just troubled
"Silence!" he roars, fist closed over palm
Nary does anyone do anything to disarm
How did this happen, how did it occur?
I shall tell you the tale now, hereupon
Ramtor the malefic wizard cast a plot
One of wickedness and magic sought
By casting a spell upon the castle guards
He coerced King Skarl to a dungeon, quite a spot!
He further aims magic for more awful deeds
Right at the townsfolk, do take heed!
The evil Bruce casts another spell
Over the land, despite their pleads
The citizens who were once sweet and kind
Are transformed into those of no sound mind
Destructive and violent they do become
As Ramtor is gleeful at the plot now aligned
Is there no hope in the name of goodwill?
Oh look here, I see something still!
Why, it's Rohane & Mipsy, protectors come forth!
With a cheerful horn, they let out a loud trill
What will happen now, who can tell?
But the prospects are buoyant, all will be well
A dark and eerie Bruce Day,
Falls upon Neovia's streets,
And windows are bolted by many,
Be they businessmen or cheats.
An audible groan is murmured,
Growing louder still,
As a famous Neovian Bruce,
Fills the alleyways with a chill.
Once a proud and fearless mayor,
Now Thumburt walks alone,
Off to celebrate Bruce Day,
With an exasperated groan.
Wearing top and tails,
And ambling with a cane,
Listening at doorways,
In case someone calls his name.
But all he hears is silence,
And so he staggers on,
Through the twists and turns of Neovia,
Until this Bruce Day's gone.
If you've never heard the name,
Of Mayor Thumburt at all,
It would serve you well to look it up,
In case he gives you a call...
A Brucicle For Bruce Day
A cold day
In the month of Celebrating
One dedicated to a species
That deserves cheering.
Today is the day
That we celebrate the Bruce
Of all shapes and sizes
Even Thumburt the brute.
And on this day
Why not have a snack
That bears their image
As a matter of fact.
A cold treat
For a cool 'pet
Despite the temperature
It will warm your heart I bet.
As many flavors
That you can see
So pick your favorite
Of this treat that's icy.
Lemon, lime, and orange cream
Strawberry will rock your socks
Or perhaps you'd like the flavor
Of the late Hubrid Nox.
Fruity, Flatfruit, Chokato
Voidberry and beef
Just be careful if you try chalk
That you don't hurt your teeth.
No matter what's your favorite
On this day have a treat
And have a Brucicle for Bruce Day
To celebrate a 'pet that's neat.
Brucey B's Slot Machine!
Step right up! Pull the lever!
But beware, this machine is very clever.
Insert your Neopoints
Hoping to win the jackpot,
But the real main goal
Is for you to lose a lot.
Make no mistake as to
By whom these slots are owned,
This slick little Bruce is very well-known.
His name is Brucey B and he's rich and wise.
He knows the art of trickery wears no size.
Once you start you know it's hard to stop,
You keep inserting coins
Until you haven't a drop.
Withdrawing from the bank
And spending all of your savings,
Then fussing about your losses,
Many rantings and ravings.
It's music to our ears; the tune the slots play,
Our eyes are fixated; we can play all day!
Some of us are lucky;
A small win here and there,
But the point still remains
Most of our pockets are bare.
Who can resist the flare
Of a luck and chance game?
Especially the one owned by
The bruce with the very famous name.
But when you lose
Don't throw a fit or make a scene,
Just know that you've fallen under
The spell of Brucey B's slot machine!
Lament Of An Invisible Bruce
It's hard to be invisible, unnoticed, and unseen,
To make my way throughout the day
Avoiding elbows, knees, and feet;
Dodging and darting between blind strangers,
Keeping pace in empty spaces,
Always looking out for dangers.
It's hard to be invisible, an intangible Bruce,
To participate and articulate,
To have others accurately deduce,
The meanings of my words,
Of my disembodied voice,
To have them construe
Without nonverbal cues,
The emotions behind my points.
It's hard to be invisible
With the name "nobody,"
In the whirl of this superficial world,
How could anyone understand me?
You look through me
When you smile at your friend
And that act of goodwill
Gives me a quaking chill,
Like a cold and cutting wind.
It's so hard to be invisible, intangible, alone,
Wandering without a face, feeling out of place,
When I venture outside my Neohome.
Ah, but that's my castle, my keep,
Where nobody is my name,
And alone shall I reign,
For at home I am the queen.
Happy Bruce Day!
Bruce, oh Bruce
Oh silly little Bruce
The 5th day of Celebrating
Is all about you!
From the very beginning
You were one of the cutest
With a big bowtie
And a left-handed high five
You came as a present
To the Neopian people
Bringing fun and exciting
To the frozen Terror Mountain world
Brucey B saved Sakhmet from disaster
He has his own slots.
He’s a champion at Cheat!
And his shaded glasses rock
Sliding on your bellies
Swimming in the sea
There’s nothing that could be better
While celebrating Bruce Day!
Zippity! Zappity! Zoom!
As Boochi's gun goes boom.
No matter where you loom,
You'll surely meet your "cutest" doom.
Pum! Pum! Pum! The mayor stomps his foot,
As we uncover Neovia's evil truth.
Too bad Neopians ruined Thumbart's suit,
It doesn't matter now,
He's just a plain little Moquot.
Swish! Swash! Swoon!
As Chimi Magi rides her broom.
Concocts some potions in her room,
Or maybe she's just making a new perfume.
Cling! Clang! Clank!
Goes the cell door where the king is locked.
Ramtor's the new king -- oh, what a shock!
Too bad, everyone is brainwashed.
Swoosh! Swing! Slash!
Go the pirates' swords as they bash,
While Ol' Benny loots some cash.
Poor Neopians tremble, in a flash.
Evil as they are, no matter who they are.
A lot of Bruces surely made it this far.
Making our days bizarre,
Today they are our star.
You should all know me, I’m Brucey B!
I’m the luckiest Neopet around, you see,
I own a slot machine just for fun,
Take a spin, see if you’ve won!
Will you hit the jackpot with all aces?
Or win with all Acara queen faces?
Will you be lucky
And get a bunch of wild cards?
Come on down to play, it isn’t hard.
Some Neopians have won
Millions off the jackpot,
Is it your turn to win big?
It doesn’t cost much to play,
And chances are this could be your big day!
I looked on my calendar
And today is Bruce Day,
What better way to celebrate
Than to come on down and play!
Come spin the Tchea and Puntec Fruits,
Who knows? Spin five scarabs
And win some loot!
Boochi can put a pea in diapers,
He can make a royalboy whine,
He can make a cute 'pet of a mutant,
And he comes without a warning or sign.
He can be a sweet fortune,
Or he can be an lousy disaster.
It doesn't matter where you hide,
for it's your Neopet he's after!
He'll find you shopping at the mall,
And he'll find you while you explore.
He can be waiting at your favorite game.
You're not even safe chatting on the boards!
Ex-plushie owners will cry,
Ex-pirate owners will bellow,
But the one who's left smiling,
Will be the owner of the yellow!
His goal is quite simple,
Though his aim is not always precise!
He's creating his Neopian utopia,
One baby zap at a time!
If you're feeling blue this afternoon,
Then don't worry, Bruce Day is here soon.
I think you should give them a chance,
They'll make you smile the way they dance.
Go to Terror Mountain where there's snow
And you're bound to see a Bruce, I know.
But look both ways because you just might
Walk right into a Bruce's snowball fight.
Because Bruces love snowball fights, you see
Any Bruce I know would agree.
If you would like to join in the game,
Just ask, and tell them your name.
Because snowball fights are all in good fun
And Bruce love to play under the warm sun.
And I can assure you there's no better way
Than a little Bruce to brighten your day.
So then, on this fifth of December, don't be shy
There is so much going on outside.
You will feel so much better I say,
If you play in the snow on Bruce Day.
Boochi, Coochy, Coo!
His name is spoken with such malice,
Reviled by Neopians everywhere --
But how could they hate such a tiny Bruce?
Should I really be scared?
His cheeks are so plump and chubby!
See how he waddles through snow?
Pastel strawberry and vanilla down
And framed with that playful red bow.
Even his name sounds so darling:
Boochi, coochy, coo!
Why is everyone running away?
Perhaps he will play with you?
Oh, his beady eyes are on me!
It looks like he's aiming his toy...
Is that a little laser gun?
Perfect for a tiny Bruce boy!
Did... did he just fire at me?
Thankfully, he missed!
Boochi, you had best be careful,
Or you'll get on my bad list!
The Jolly Christmas Bruce
The cold breezes are sweeping in,
It's time for the snowballs to fly again.
Frost covering the once-green grass,
'Pets enveloped in clothes of the largest mass!
When you think winter, what comes to mind,
An icy chill going down your spine?
Snowy grounds, cheery Christmas Neopets,
And Christmas trees?
Perhaps a Christmas Bruce passing out Presents? Yes, please!
Everyone's heard of the jolly Christmas Bruce,
The thought of him will make
The naughtiest 'pet yell, "Truce!"
Coal is what you'll get,
If you're a naughty girl or boy,
The nicest 'pets can always expect
A bundle of toys.
The Christmas Bruce
Will sneak into your house,
Don't expect to hear him,
He's as quiet as a mouse!
He snacks on cookies and milk
While placing presents under the tree,
Awaiting the awakening of 'pets
Cheering with glee.
The Christmas Bruce puts joy in the holiday,
He makes everyone think
About changing their naughty ways.
While all of Neopia waits for him to appear,
He grows more and more loved,
Each and every year.
Bruce On The Loose!
One little Bruce who loved to skate,
Couldn't find his ice skating shoes one day.
They weren't over here,
They weren't over there.
That little Bruce couldn't find them anywhere!
He ran outside while his tippie-toes froze,
Icicles began to grow from his nose,
While he searched out front
And behind the house
The skates were still nowhere to be found.
Up and down the neighborhood he went,
To no avail, he started feeling bent.
With the cold he started going faster,
Carefull, little Bruce, this could lead to disaster!
When the Bruce looked down,
He couldn't help but sing.
He was wearing them all along!
What a delightful thing!
His worries were gone
And off to the rink he went,
While the music notes he gathered
Were beautifully sent.
Happy Bruce Day!
On The Merits Of The Brucicle
If you want a frozen lolly,
A brucicle should be your folly.
A Lenny sells this icy treat,
Along with candy made of sleet.
Daring those great cliffs of ice,
Is most certainly worth the price.
Chia pops are overrated,
They'll leave your wallet devastated.
But brucicles are great all year,
So good your Neopet will shed a tear.
Bruces and Lupes they love them so,
Even Usuls can't say no.
Orange, Christmas, haunted, lime
Are top sellers around this time.
If you care for something more exotic,
The flavors do get more exotic,
Skullberry, durian, chalk, and snot,
Then again you might not.
Excuse me, though, as I do digress,
It's just that brucicles are always best,
Cold, sweet, and tangy, too,
The first one's cheaper just for you.
And if you don't believe me now,
Just try one as I take my bow.
A large pool of ice,
Usually slippery like glass.
What happens to the poor Bruce
Who steps into a break in the ice.
Some music notes are a shade of
Bright, bright magenta.
When the judges give a score of 0
To subtly tell you to try harder.
The ice is thinning,
Time is running out!
Connect the music notes together
And produce a harmonizing chord.
A large pool of ice,
Usually slippery like glass.
Cuttin' Loose With A Bruce
I once met a Patamoose who was on the loose --
He was on his way to meet up with a Bruce.
"I better hurry or he'll cook my goose,
I'm the missing member of the sailing crews!"
Tripping over leaves, he cried "By Zeus,
I went and forgot my thick-fur mousse!
We might be at war or there might be a truce,
But I feel like I'm on a train --
And I'm the caboose!"
"Don't worry," I cried, "Don't fear the noose,
I know this particular blue furry Bruce.
He's a bundle of fun and he likes to cut loose,
So don't worry, my dear friend Patamoose."
The Patamoose breathed a sigh of relief
And let out some coos,
"You've really given me a boost,
I won't even need a lateness excuse
I'll just go and boogie with this awesome Bruce."
When Bruces Fly
When, you ask, do Bruces fly?
When do their chubby little bodies
Ever take to the skies?
Well, flying is a Bruce’s hobby, when...
Their owner has painted them with
Something rare they found on the ground
Like an elusive Faerie Paint Brush, now Bruces
Can flutter and zoom all around, or when...
Their owner has spent their precious NP
On a very special pair of Sugar Cookie Wings
Or the ever-so sought after
Beautiful Glowing Wings,
Bruces would love their owners
To get them these things!
When do Bruces fly, you ask?
Take a peek at the NC Mall and see,
What every Bruce desires most,
A pair of snazzy, sparkling wings!
Yes, Bruces can fly, given the right tools
If you own a Bruce, then yes, it’s up to you!
To let your Bruce fly or keep them aground,
“Without wings,” your Bruce cries,
“You can just take me to the Pound!”
Christmas Bruce Is Coming To Town
That jolly little fellow
With his sleigh jingling loud
Leads his reindeer down gently
‘Til they strike snow, freshly ploughed
They jingle past the houses
They prance across the hills
All the while that fellow
Laughs through the wintery chills
At last they reach their first stop
Park the sleigh near a great white spruce
Inside, the children dream of what’s to come
When they are visited by the Christmas Bruce
Cuddly - With - A - Bow - Day
Red Bruce Plushie
Yellow Bruce Plushie
Christmas - In - A - Fuzzy - Coat Bruce Plushie
"Being Bruce" Book
"Book of Bruce" Book
Book - Explaining - Bruces Book
Baby Bruce Plushie
Halloween Bruce Plushie
Valentines - With - A - Heart Bruce Plushie
Bruce Battle Blade Weapon
Bruce Fish Slingshot Weapon
Bruce - Cute - But - Also - A - Fighter Weapon
Journal of Bruce
Blue - Balloon - That's - Shaped - Like - Bruce
Baby Blocks of Bruce
Guide of Magic of Bruce
It's - Bruce - Day - So - Everything - Is - Bruce
Total Poetry Pages : 1926
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