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Page 1655


Tonu Jokes For Tonu Day
by Mamasimios

As we arrive at Tonu Day
I am reminded of some jokes,
Told to me by Tonu friends,
Those gentle, jolly folks

Okay, why was the Tonu broke,
Overdrawn on credit cards?
Because even when she had Neopoints,
She always loved to CHARGE!

Did you hear why the restaurant kelp
Had to fire the famous Chef Boulgar?
No matter what greens the customers ordered,
He would substitute Swiss CHARD! 

Why did Captain Scarblade 
Shun the Pirate Brute
In the long ago Maraquan War?
The Tonu never mastered pirate slang,
He would always call out CHAARRRRRR!

Why is it so easy to sneak past
The sleeping Magma Pool Guard?
He doesn't know when to go home to bed
Because his schedule is singed and CHARRED!

Well, I never actually said they're funny,
Tonu humour is just okay,
But I hope these jokes 
Still brought some smiles
On this most happy Tonu Day

The Maraquan Tonu
by Dr_tomoe

Beneath the waves
and under the sea
live the Maraquan 'pets
for all to see.

Fishy 'pets from
the land of water,
from Kacheeks to Ogrins,
they all swim under.

But the species that best
puts on a show
swimming through the water
is the Maraquan Tonu.

It's a lovely blue and green,
with colors that are subdued,
which mix together perfectly
to create an ocean hue.

They're not all beauty.
They have sharp tusks, too,
and a powerful horn, as well,
they can use to charge through.

But they look so majestic,
and there's more to be said,
it's so different they almost
look like they're unconverted.

Guildeford, Neopia's Most Stylish Tonu
by Blessed_faerie

Guildeford the Tonu had his minute of fame,
It was all due to his shining golden mane.
In Year Twelve, 
He was the host of Style Showdown,
Now he spends his time 
Signing autographs in town.

Each day he goes from shop to shop,
Looking around and taking stock.
Everyone knows he has impeccable taste,
He can't let his style skills go to waste.

He always browses Unis clothing store,
Where he bought everything he ever wore.
He also visits the Grooming Parlor,
Because everyone 
With a mane needs a barber.

He starts each day with a spritz of perfume,
Guildeford still thinks it's important to groom.
Though he's not onscreen, 
He stays looking neat.
In his words, 
"You never know who'll you meet!"

Once he's dressed up and his mane is combed,
He'll finally be ready to leave his home.
He strolls around Neopia for all to see,
Because fashionable is the only way to be!

The Qasalan Business Tonu
by Silver_azalea

“Step right up, no need
To be shy! Today might be
Quite fortuitous!”

A red Tonu calls
To many passersby, who
Walk bedecked in drapes.

The famous (or rather
Infamous to some) wheel is
In the Lost Desert;

Qasala, to be
More exact concerning its
Hidden whereabouts.

He sits by a large
Water fountain all day, fenced
By various items.

If you spin his wheel
And land on something rare, you
Might receive a prize.

From stats to brushes,
There are a myriad of
Tantalizing things.

Be warned, though; it is
Quite hard to win at this game.
Many lose millions;

Though the right spin could
Lead to a vast and boundless
Wealth of Neopoints!

It is quite a plight,
Indeed! Which is no problem
For the rich Tonu.

Famous Tonu Ghosts
by Chavo_guerrero

Do you know of any ghosts
Whose species is Tonu?
Have you heard the tale
Of one or maybe two?

I doubt you've heard of any,
For they're not that well-known,
But I could tell you a little
That I read in a book I own.

Famous Tonu Ghosts
Is what this book is called,
And when I started reading
I was quickly quite enthralled.

There's the ghost of Major Quimb,
Who haunts the Tyrannian plains,
And the ghost of Madame Jona,
Who rattles eerie chains.

Deep within the mountains
Is another ghostly soul,
A Tonu mountain climber,
Whose name is "Spooky" Joel.

And down upon Krawk Island
Is a Tonu ghost parade,
Which appears every evening
In an abandoned haunted glade.

I haven't finished reading
This astounding Tonu book,
Because I get a little scared
Every time I look.

But I'm hoping, as I curl up,
Safe in my comfy chair,
That none of these ghosties
Are anywhere that's near!

Tonu CHARGE!!!
by Dortho

A little Tonu went on an adventure one day, 
He loved to charge and he loved to play! 
Strutting his stuff in the Tyrannian plains, 
This li'l Tonu was out to make some gains. 

Bonking his head to the high score table 
In Destruct-O-Match III, 
He got the best combo anyone could see!
In the arena he also did well. 
Isn't that swell?

Venturing outside his native land, 
Swimmingly, he found an area underwater 
That also had sand! 
This must be Maraqua he thought to himself, 
While he went to kelp, loosening his belt. 

He went and ordered and had a nice meal,
The prices on the menu were pretty far off, 
When he saw his bill, 
He spit out his food and coughed!

The bill was waaay too much! 
Something no one would want to touch. 
With a handful of NP in his pocket, 
Not quite enough to cover it, 

The Tonu said, "I'll just CHARGE IT!!!"

A Desire for Omelettes
by Kuroge

A giant yellow feast
on the sunny ground,
attracts a particular
species from all around.

Allured by the scent
of the sun-baked omelette,
Tonu gather to feast
around the golden goblet.

From dawn to dusk
as the egg sits and cooks,
they will eat and devour
every last savory nook.

The rotten odor that
drifts up from time to time,
only signals to the Tonu
that it is still their mealtime.

Tonu Guard
by Fleur_411

In the land where fire burns
And lava runs so hot,
You want to go to the lava pool,
But the guard says you will not

This Tonu is always at his post,
His watch rarely let down,
But if he happens to fall asleep,
Maybe you can sneak around?

But this is a very rare case,
Most likely you'll find him awake,
And unless you know Moltara well
You'll need a new path to take

If you want the Tonu to let you pass,
Then you "Must be well-versed
In the ways of Moltara"
If not, your luck is cursed

Now, you may be wondering why
This lava Tonu guards the pool,
If your 'pet chooses to enter it,
Then he'll be made of lava, too!

A Tonu And His Wheel
by Flufflepuff

Through a doorway plain as milk,
A large red Tonu stands
Next to a wheel. Both of them are
Formidable and grand.

The Tonu's reddish color's hard
To tell beneath his gold,
But given that he's covered up,
It's safe to guess he's old.

The Tonu by the wheel, he bows,
Purple cloth tucked in arms.
Decked in gold, one cannot help
But glow with pride and charm.

Earrings, horn tip, purple capes,
Tell onlookers he's rich.
But how did he get that way?
He'll tell you; do not snitch.

"It's the Wheel of Extravagance!"
His voice, it shakes the ground.
"So many prizes to be won
For 100k per round."

The wheel has pictures on its parts,
Some quite lovely, others plain.
It would be next to useless
Without him to explain.

"Items, avatars, and stamps,
Or nothing whatsoever.
I'm not dishonest, not at all.
I'm only very clever."

The Wheel of Extravagance --
Those who spun it knew
That they would not have tried it
If not for that Tonu.

So Grumpy
by Trubiekatie

I just came out for fun,
To bowl a quick game.
He doesn’t handle losing,
Which is really quite a shame.

Dr. Grumps is a quite famous
Member of the Gourmet Club.
He eats delicious foods;
They’re anything but grub.

In his spare time he bowls,
On the lawn and not a lane.
When the weather is permitting,
I really can’t complain!

He may be a bit older,
But he bowls very well.
If you can find a way to beat him,
Just wait for him to yell!

I’m close to that white ball,
But then he knocks mine out.
I’ll do the same to him,
Then I’ll wait for him to pout.

It seems I’ve won again,
And on to the next round.
Just a few more players,
And soon I will be crowned.

So, now that it’s Tonu Day,
I best try this crazy game.
Dr. Grumps will get angry,
If he does not get fame!

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