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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 24th day of Eating, Yr 21
The Neopian Times Week 1 > Articles > Is Your NeoHome Good Enough For You and Your Pets?

Is Your NeoHome Good Enough For You and Your Pets?

by noelle90

NeoHomes, the newest and greatest invention for NeoPets and their owners, right? Wrong. Think about it. Do you really believe that cardboard, straw, twigs, bamboo, chocolate, jelly, white chocolate, or clouds can keep your NeoPet(s) safe? Or dry? Or happy? It's much more sensible to build your home out of wood, stone, bricks, marble, gold, silver, or transparishield. They are all strong, sturdy, dependable materials. But there is a downside to all of these materials, even the better ones. Let us compare these building resources.

Cardboard 150 NP
Straw 250 NP
Twigs 300 NP
Bamboo 400 NP
Wood 500 NP
Chocolate 650 NP
Jelly 750 NP
Stone 800 NP
Brick 1000 NP
White Chocolate 1200 NP
Marble 1500 NP
Silver 2500 NP
Cloud 4000 NP
Gold 7500 NP
Transparishield 14500 NP

Now that the prices are known, on with the comparison!

Cardboard
Cardboard is by far the cheapest material, but is also by far the flimsiest, worst material out there. It crumbles, it deteriorates, it biodegrades, it is just horrible! How would you like to live in a cardboard box? I didn't think you would. Cardboard is a definite no-no unless your pet likes homeless chic as a theme. If your pet really doesn't mind living in cardboard, go right ahead.

Straw
Straw is the second cheapest. OK, don't get me started on straw, I mean, HELLO! What are you, the first little pig? That house will blow away in a snap if you didn't secure it some how. Let's see, glue would take too much time and effort.......hmmmmmmm........ Ah Ha! Tape!! Tape your straw house together, tape it the ground, and viola! Straw house a la NeoPets! But seriously, people. Straw? Dried grass. Very bland, very bug infested, very itchy, very flammable. It is preferable over cardboard as it is country chic. Add some floral decor and it could look pretty nice. But watch out for those bugs, and absolutely NO candles inside the house!

Twigs
Again, I use this analogy....... What are you, the second little pig? Twigs, what can I say, twigs are twigs. They are like branches only smaller. They are a pretty good deal as they are cheap yet they give you a short term commitment. They should hold up for at least three months max. This is preferable to pets that only want to stay in one area for a short period of time. Twigs are very travel friendly. Pack them up, bring your house with you wherever you go. But watch out for those strong winds. And stay away from the idea of indoor campfires. Don't keep pet woodpeckers. And rain is kind of a threat to twigs also. It'll rot the wood and invite infestations of grubs and icky stuff like that.

Bamboo
Three Words: No Pet Pandas.

Wood
Wood is good. (Hey, I'm a poet!) It holds up for quite a while. It is, well, wood. Most of the twig rules apply to wood.

Chocolate and White Chocolate
Simple rules. Chocolate will melt causing great chocolate floods. But if you ever get hungry, you can just take out a chunk of your wall for a snack. It is very difficult to keep files and other insects of of your walls, but you'll get used to it. You may find that an increased number of friends want to come over when you get a chocolate room.

Jelly
Jelly is a highly developed form of wall texture and is highly recommended by me and everyone I know.

Stone Brick and Marble
These materials are all highly dependable, very chic, very elegant, but not very much fun. I you prefer beauty over quality, then use these.

Cloud
Very comfortable. You will save a lot of money on beds if you get this room. Sleep on the floor. Much more cozy than even the fluffiest bed.

Silver and Gold
Very fashionable, but smugglers may be running away with chunks of your house to sell.

Transparishield
The best! No Doubt about it ladies and jellyspoons! This stuff is the best thing to build your walls out of. (I'm not quite sure what it does or is, but I'm afraid if I don't say it's the best It'll hurt me.)

Now that we've discussed the materials, I must explain to you that it doesn't matter which you choose, because NeoHomes are always safe and nothing bad ever can happen to them unless you destroy them. So use whatever you want to build them.


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