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Zarrelian, a Halloween Ixi, smiled as he watched the
large hand on the clock inch ever closer to the twelve. The little hand was
pointing to the three, so when the minute hand reached twelve, he would be free.
Well, not exactly. He would be free from spelling...
The Ixi glanced distastefully down at the paper before him, filled with pointless
words that he had to look up in his dictionary and define. So far he had only
done one. He had written "annoying annoyance" as a definition for the word,
"sibling".
Zarrelian had detention. He would have to stay
one hour after Neoschool every day for a month, just because he had cheated
on one, little test. The Ixi snorted, shooting a venom filled glare in the direction
of his teacher, a nasty old Draik called Mr. Bronston.
But, unlike most pets in his predicament, Zarrelian
was actually looking forward to his detention. Why? Because he got to help Mr.
Bronston with his filing duties. That, the deranged little Ixi thought,
would be the Draik’s greatest mistake! Alas, it was. Poor Mr. Bronston
should’ve put Zarrelian on blackboard duty, grounds keeping patrol or even made
him the cafeteria monitor instead of letting him loose upon the filing cabinet.
Mr. Bronston, sitting leisurely in his desk,
paused long enough from reading The Neopian Times to glance up the clock. He
cast a baleful glare over his students, sighed and set down his newspaper.
"Pencils down, please. You may begin packing
up your supplies and leave when the bell rings. Pick a yellow sheet from off
my desk on your way out; it’s your homework." The
Draik whipped his head around and glared at Zarrelian.
"Except you, Ixi. You have detention. With me. Until four O clock." He wrinkled
his nostrils in distaste and straightened his tie, turning back to his desk.
Zarrelian’s desk neighbor, a Faerie Gelert named
Poloroe, paused before leaving to give the Ixi a sympathetic pat on the back.
"Good luck with your detention, Zarrelian."
the Gelert said, his large amber eyes filled with pity. Zarrelian merely rolled
his eyes in response and continued packing away his things. Poloroe left in
a huff.
Zarrelian waited impatiently in his desk until
the bell rang, fidgeting in his chair. Finally, the silence of the classroom
was shattered by the piercing ring of the school bell as the relieved students
filed out of the door and into the hallway beyond. Mr. Bronston flapped his
leathery wings and soared over to the Ixi, a cruel smirk forming across his
scaly muzzle.
"Well Zarrelian, are you ready to begin your
detention?"
Zarrelian nodded, doing his best to restrain
the grin that was threatening to creep onto his face, lest his betray his intentions.
The Draik snorted, silvery wisps of smoke emanating from his nostrils.
"Good. Alright, you can start by taking these
student files…" He dumped a huge stack of dusty files into Zarrelian’s outstretched
hooves, sneezing as the dust wafted up to his nostrils.
"Just put the name of the students into the
corresponding lettered drawer. See, this one says Doreetoa, so you would
put it in the ‘D’ drawer." He said, leaning against his desk as he took a long
sip from his ever-present mug of Borovan. Zarrelian nodded to show that he understood,
and carefully stepped over to the large steel filing cabinet, taking care not
to drop any of the precious records.
He opened up the door to the cabinet, and began,
with some caution as Mr. Bronston was still eyeing him reproachfully, to slide
the files into their proper drawer. After Mr. Bronston became satisfied that
the Ixi was doing a good job, the Draik snatched up his copy of the Neopian
Times and ambled out the door, en route to the staff room. Zarrelian chuckled
evilly to himself and began to carefully slit open the files with his ruler,
examining their contents with glee.
"Hmm, here’s Poloroe’s file. Let’s just see
what I can dig up on him!" He flipped frantically through the kind Gelert’s
file, searching for some dirt. Finally, he found some.
"Aha! He isn’t genuinely Faerie colored! It
was just a lucky side affect of his earlier lab ray training…" He regarded Poloroe’s
file critically. "That’s okay, but not good enough. Let’s see what else we can
find." The Ixi dove to the cabinet, his little devil tail wagging harder and
harder as he discovered more and more confidential information on his peers.
"Hmm, Grifylite used to be a gold, silver and
bronze Eyrie… Serrigra never graduated from Neogarten, Zaveeni stole his Petpet
from his owner’s safety deposit box, Mr. Bronston’s middle name is… WHAT?!"
Zarrelian dropped the file to the floor, staring in disbelief at what he had
discovered. He couldn’t believe it, but it was true. An evil little grin crept
across the Ixi’s muzzle as he began to imagine what he could do.
"Oh, this is good. This is very good. I think
that I’d better go pay a little visit to Mr. Andy ‘A’ Bronston in the old staff
room… Heheh." The Ixi trotted out the door, the file clenched tightly in his
hooves. He galloped along the hallways, sniggering to himself util he finally
found the staff room. He gently pushed the door open, and saw Mr. Bronston,
sitting on a worn old couch with his claws propped up on the coffee table. Aside
from him, the entire room was deserted. The Draik glanced up from his newspaper
and glared at Zarrelian.
"What’re you doing in here? You couldn’t possibly
be done already. Get back to work!" he snapped, the edges of his newspaper crunching
under the Draik’s claws. Zarrelian smirked, and helped himself to some Neocola
from the staff fridge, plopping down on an overstuffed armchair opposite to
his puzzled teacher.
"You’re no position to make any orders, Bronston,"
the Ixi coolly replied, taking a sip of his Neocola.
"What do you mean, Ixi? I’m in no mood for games."
"I know your middle name!" Zarrelian snarled,
crunching the empty Neocola between in his hooves. "And everyone else will know,
too, unless you start treating me a little better."
Mr. Bronston completely blanched. He nervously
jerked his tie, and glanced uneasily around the room.
"Now Zarrel, There’s no need to do something
like that…"
Zarrelian sniggered. "Yes there is. And I will."
Mr. Bronston put his head in his hands, groaning.
"What do you want?"
Zarrelian began ticking demands off on his hooves,
smiling as Mr. Bronston became more and more flabbergasted with each new request.
"I want to be excused from every test. I want
‘A’ pluses in every subject. I want Poloroe to get tests that are ten times
harder than everyone else’s…" The list went on. And on, and on.
"Fine! Fine! It’s done, now would leave me alone?"
the Draik pleaded, staring at the floor. Zarrelian nodded.
"Sure, Bronsty. But I might ask for something
else tomorrow…" And with that, the Ixi clip-clopped out the door, headed for
home. Meanwhile, back in the staff room, Mr. Bronston fell to his knees and
looked up at the ceiling.
"Just delete me now!"
***
"You want WHAT!?" Mr. Bronston roared.
"Yup, and I want it NOW," Zarrelian replied.
"No."
"Yes."
"NO!"
"A-B-I…"
"Alright, alright, I’ll do it."
Zarrelian chuckled. He always won. He watched
Mr. Bronston stomp out of the classroom and towards the main office, where he
had to make a certain announcement, one that Zarrelian had ordered him to compose.
The Ixi leaned back in his desk, basking in the glow of his leadership, waiting
for the announcement to come on over the intercom. He waited for another minute
or so, and then finally, the speaker crackled and Mr. Bronston’s tired voice
came over the PA system.
"This song is for Zarrelian…" he said miserably,
and then became to recite a crudely written song in his cracked, off-key voice.
"There is one Ixi, and he’s very smart. He’s
loyal and kind and brave of heart… He’s nimble and swift and very… err, good.
He’s everything great that an Ixi could… Um, do… That is all."
There was a stunned silence following the Draik’s
"song", but it only lasted for about a minute. As if one cue, the entire school
erupted in laughter. All except for three Pets. Shelleylou, Mordegan and Ezanna.
They were Zarrelian’s siblings, and they had all had Mr. Bronston as a teacher
once. Shelly, a shadowed Gelert, and Ezanna, a skunk Krawk, were both in the
same classroom. They exchanged a glance and got up out of their desks, not bothering
to tell their teacher where they were going, because she was far to occupied
with trying to calm down her other students, while fighting back laughter herself.
The two Pets traveled in stony silence until they reached Mordegan’s classroom.
They entered without knocking, and grabbed the stunned, forest green Lupe. He
stared at his two siblings, shock etched in his wolfish features.
"What’s going on? Was that Mr. Bronston?" he
asked in a flabbergasted tone. Shelly nodded.
"Yes, it was. Obviously, Zarrelian is doing
something terrible to that poor Draik." The Gelert spat, glaring at the framed
picture of Zarrelian, student of the month, which hung on the wall. Ezanna nodded.
"Zarrelian’s obviously blackmailing him."
Mordegan’s eyes widened in terror. "Oh man, If
Zarrel isn’t afraid of Mr. Bronston, then why should he be afraid of us? I’m
scared Shelly…" Shelly patted the Lupe’s emerald pelted back comfortingly.
"Don’t worry Morty. I’ve got an idea. Come on,
let’s go to the main office."
The three pets traveled swiftly to the office,
where they saw Mr. Bronston, slumped in his chair, the microphone still clamped
in his claws, though the PA system was long since switched off. When he saw
the trio of Pets, he sighed gratefully and extended his claws.
"Ezanna, Shelly, Mordegan! You came to save
me… Save me from… HIM!" He jerked his thumb in the direction of another student
of the month photo, in which was Zarrelian grinning evilly and giving a ‘hooves
up’ sign. The Draik shuddered, inching away from the picture as though it was
going to bite him. Ezanna shook his head.
"Mr. Bronston! What has he done to you?"
"He’s blackmailing me, he knows my middle name.
You have to help me…"
Shelly grinned. "And I know just how. We’ll give
you all the dirt on Zarrel, and believe me, we have a lot."
Mr. Bronston sighed gratefully, shaking the Gelert’s
paw. "Thank you Shelly! You’re a lifesaver."
"Oh, don’t thank me. Thank… Well, actually…
Yeah, you can thank me."
Ezanna rolled his eyes and nudged Mordegan in
the ribs, who sniggered ruefully. Mr. Bronston settled back into his chair,
folded his claws and grinned. "Alright, give me all the information you’ve got
on our friend Zarrelian."
"He has to sleep in Battlesunn’s room when he
gets nightmares…"
"He has a chronic fear of Kadoaties…"
"He plays, ‘Lord Zarrelian’ in his room with
his Petpet Mallard…"
"He once switched places with Dr. Sloth, but
had to quit because he couldn’t control the Grundos or understand their language…"
"My sister can beat him up."
"He once accidentally cloned me…"
"His middle name is Longfellow!"
Mr. Bronston laughed, slapping his knees with
his claws. "Haha! Oh man, I was worried about him blackmailing me! This stuff
is rich, very rich. Now, if you’LL all excuse me, I have a certain ‘Ixi Of Doom’
to visit…"
***
Zarrelian sat in his desk, buffing his hooves. Suddenly, the door to the classroom
burst open, and in strode Mr. Bronston, his yellow eyes blazing. He walked over
to Zarrelian and placed his claws on either side of the Ixi’s desk, his jet-black
tie hanging limply in front of Zarrelian’s nose.
"It’s game over, Zarry-Boy. I’m not under your
control any longer!"
Zarrelian snorted, and crossed his arms over
his chest.
"Oh yeah? Why don’t we just tell everyone what
the ‘A’ in your name stands for?"
Mr. Bronston grinned, his yellowed fangs jutting
our from under his gums.
"I wouldn’t if I were you. Your siblings gave
me the goods on you, Ixi."
Zarrelian tugged at his collar nervously. "What
kinds of goods?"
The Draik laughed, and began to recite small
titbits of information.
"Nightmares, Kadoaties, ‘Lord Zarrelian’, Dr.
Sloth, Clones… Longfellow!"
Zarrelian made a small squeaking sound. "Eeep…"
"So what do you say, Zarrel?"
"Alright, alright, I’LL stop blackmailing you…"
"Good. Oh, and you’LL have to do all those tests
that you managed to weasel out of…"
Zarrelian sighed. So his latest plan had failed.
So he had to do a bunch of make up tests. So he wasn’t student of the month
anymore. It didn’t matter too much to Zarrelian, for he knew… That tomorrow
was another school day!
The End
Author’s Note: Zaibane, Grifylite, Zaveeni and Poloroe are all my Pets that
live on my extension account, Zigzagbart. Serrigra lives on my brother’s old
account, universal_puppy, though I take care of her and the other Pets in there.
I love feedback… (And hatemail) –so send em’ on in!
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