What Can We Expect? by chibi_minzanu |  |
WINTER VALLEY - I've been in the world of Neopia for some time now. Again and
again, questions of Neopia's future have popped into my tiny little head. So,
I've decided to visit all the lands of Neopia and try and find out what is about
to befall their inhabitants. Starting in the north, Happy Valley, the Snow Caves,
and Terror Mountain...
I predict that Happy Valley will become... not so happy. I bet my rainbow
toe-socks on it! Have you ever seen the Snow Wars building in the middle of
Happy Valley? Well, that is what will start a huge snow war between all the
Neopets who come to Happy Valley! They will crave power, and fight with all
their exploding snowballs to obtain it! So what is this power, you ask? It is
the power to... uh... well, I really don't know, but believe me, they want it
bad.
In the snow caves, as many of us have very painfully found out, the Snowager
lives in a cave, near the Scratchcard Kiosk. I predict the Snowager will disappear.
I believe the Snowager will "move out" of his cave, and take all his treasure
with him. That's definitely what I'd do. Shame on all you pesky Neopians! Stealing
the Snowagers precious items, and forcing him to move out! Where he will move
to, nobody knows...
Up in the heights of Terror Mountain, we can expect Mika and Carassa to go
out of business. They have been selling the items in their igloo for around...
well a very very long time. Eventually, they will run out of thing to sell,
and go out of business. Oh well, no more bargain for us, unless they go off
and open an official shop somewhere. You never know. On to Tyrannia...
In Tyrannia, have you ever been to the village? It's very boring, isn't it?
Nothing ever seems to happen there. Nothing has happened there since the Tyrannian
War, when the Monoceraptor attacked... Well, I believe we can expect to see
some action soon. Have you ever visited the cave, up on the Tyrannian Plateau?
There's a huge monster living there. Perhaps it will seek to follow in the Monoceraptor's
giant footprints, and it will lead its very own attack on the village. But I
could be wrong. And so we go south and into the ocean, to Maraqua!
In the depths of the Maraqua, or what's left of it, there lives a sea slug.
What is this sea slug? What contribution or catastrophe will he bring to Neopia?
Well, I went and asked some fellow Neopians on what they thought. Many seem
to think he will become the Maraquan version of the Turmaculus. Others think
it is a new neopet, much like the Krawk. They believe the Slugawoo petpet has
something to do with it. Feed your Slugawoo some Maraquan seaweed, and voila!
Your very own sea slug Neopet. I believe we're done with Maraqua, so we venture
west, to Meridell.
In Meridell, we can expect to say goodbye to the Turmaculus once again, and
very possibly, for good this time. I believe the poor bloke is going to eat
too many petpets... causing him to spontaneously combust. Or, in other words,
he's going to go BOOM! And explode. This explosion will probably wipe out all
of the surrounding area, including the Cheese Roller hill, and Illusen's Glade.
Then we can watch Jhudora laugh her highly insane head off.
Neopia Central, the liveliest place in all of Neopia. I believe the Soup Faerie
will become tired of feeding all the poor Neopians, who are too lazy to play
a few simple games and get their own food, and she will hold Kauvara hostage.
Now why would she do that? This way, she can force feed Kauvara a bunch of her
very own potions, turning her into a giant monster that can't control itself!
The Soup Faerie will then control Kauvara and make her destroy all of Neopia,
as revenge for having to feed the "poor" lazy bums who are too lazy to visit
the Giant Omelette and get their own food.
Between Neopia Central and Meridell lies Roo Island. Here lives the creator
or Dice-A-Roo, and the king or Roo Island, King Roo! I predict that King Skarl
will become jealous of King Roo's fortune and he will attempt to take over Roo
Island and the Game of Dice-A-Roo himself. We all know how greedy King Skarl
is, do we not? :) South to the Haunted Woods.
In the mysterious Haunted Woods, lives the ever-hungry Esophagor. Since his
quests are, most of the time, not worth it, he will become SO hungry, he will
rise from the earth and leave to fetch his own food! Also, while he is up, he
will seek revenge on all who did not complete his quests! And he will randomly
show up and steal a food item from you! Oh no! Be sure to feed the Esophagor
so this never happens!
10,000 feet in the sky, we travel to a gigantic cloud known only as Faerieland.
Here lives the Faerie Queen, who works day and night, selling the items of the
hidden tower. There are very few Neopians with the money to buy these items.
And in order to keep Faerieland afloat, Fyora needs the Neopoints to keep it
going. Don't ask me why, she just does. Eventually, her need to sell extremely
high priced items will be Faerielands downfall. Faerieland will then crash (or
float) down into the sea below. But we know it'll all be okay, as I believe
the magical clouds will float on top of the water. No harm done. The water faeries
will sure be happy. :)
The island most east of Faerieland is known as Mystery Island. There is a
huge, Techo-shaped volcano in the center of Mystery Island. As far as I know,
that volcano is an active volcano, meaning it could explode at any minute! This
explosion may or may not wipe out all life on the island. The inhabitants could
always escape to the island 80 miles to the Southwest. Our next stop.
The island Southwest of Mystery Island is known as Krawk Island. Many of the
inhabitants here are treasure-seeking pirates. There is one location on Krawk
Island that is brimming with gold! Many Neopians come to the buried treasure
game and leave with a small amount of Neopoints or a booby prize. But there
is a place on that map with millions of Neopoints. The pirates seek this treasure
and will do anything for it. I predict some pirates will find the treasure...
but then the other pirates will go into an all-out war in order to steal the
treasure from the pirates who found the treasure. This will lead to the destruction
of all pirates, and then Krawk Island will become a much happier place.
Then we venture to the Lost Desert. Here is Brucey's War Tent. I believe young,
battle hungry Neopets will get the wrong picture and think the war is still
going on, and they will want a piece of the action. This will lead to a new
war, between the Neopets who know better, and the Neopets who just want to start
a ruckus. A great battle will ensue, and... I don't have a clue who will win.
So we move on and go to space.
The Virtupets Space Station, lives Dr. Sloth. Now who can guess what's going
to happen? Nope, not a war. Dr. Sloth will eventually become tired of starting
wars, and become a peaceful... uh... green guy! This will confuse all the Grundos,
who are so dim-witted, that they all believe it's a trick to get them to trust
Sloth. They will beat Dr. Sloth up, and he will become evil again. Of course,
that's just my guess.
Author's Note: This article was meant to be funny. Do not take any of this
complete nonsense serious. I am not a fortune teller. If you want you fortune
told, go to Mystery Island and have the Island Mystic tell you your fortune...
then again, all he says it mindless nonsense also. Anyway, feel free to Neomail
me any comments or criticism.
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