Buzzerfeed: Top 5 Best and Worst Jobs in Neopia

     Worst: Neopian Post Office Worker

     No one is ever casually strolling in to buy stamps to send out Neomail. Instead, customers are always skulking about, waiting to pounce as soon as you restock the stamp display! It is exhausting having to keep the inventory accurate and restock every eight or so minutes, only for hoards of people to knock everything over each time! There are probably also a lot of paper cuts involved in this position. Use lotion.

      Best: Professional yooyuball player

     Some yooyuball players do it for the glory, the fame, and the fans. Others do it for the sheer love of the sport. But the real ones? They do it for the sponsorships and the press deals that are attached to the job for the eleven months of the year outside of the Altador Cup season. Yooyuball players enjoy a good, stable career with little turnover rates. And the best part? You don’t even have to be good at yooyuball to live it up (Shoutout to Kakoni Worrill from Faerieland!). For one month of moderate running, catching, and throwing, you too can cash in on making millions of Neopoints on Neocola endorsements the rest of the year. You may not be number one (or two, or three…) on the podium, but you are number one in the fans’ hearts!

     Worst: Slushie Slinger Waitress

     There are fast-paced jobs, and then there are fast-paced jobs. There is no rush hour — it is rush life over here at the Altador Cup concessions stand. Some jobs get easier with experience, but not this one! If anything, it feels like it speeds up as the shift goes on! You might need to bring it up to the Altador Cup Committee that maximum occupancy in the stand is regularly exceeded, but you can’t even think about that until you finish these orders…

      Best: Ice Cream Cart Vendor

     Although there are very few openings for this position, ice cream cart vendor (or should we say, ice cream cart Lutari) is ranked so highly on our list because of the incredible flexibility and perks that come with the job. After securing such a lucrative contract with the Ice Cream Machine (sorry, Adee!), Mr. Chipper operates his cart in the centre of Happy Valley as a passion project, rather than out of necessity. Aside from the afterschool rush of adoring local schoolchildren, Mr. Chipper spends most of his day tapping away on the boards on his chatty Usuki flip phone because honestly, who can afford an ice cream coupon in this economy, and who wants to eat ice cream in Terror Mountain to begin with? The only con that we can see is that there is no chair. But you can probably build one out of snow if you needed to.

     Worst: Air Faerie

     While it is pretty difficult to become an air faerie if you aren’t one already, air faeries definitely do not have a highly coveted role in the faerie quest hierarchy. At best, their requests are forgotten; at worst, scorned. Air faeries experience more rejection than PCers at times. It is not their fault that their blessings are considered useless by most and have been for decades. They just really need someone to pick up more toothpaste — can someone please DungDash some?

      Best: Secondhand Shop Employee

     Although many retail or service-oriented professions are included in our worst list, this one is the exception! Why, you may ask? As a retail associate at the secondhand shop, you get first dibs on all the cool vintage clothes! (Why do you think there’s never anything left besides junk? It’s all been picked clean before opening hours!) Not only that, because everything is priced at a cool $free.99, you don’t even need to touch the register — no math skills required! For a retail job, pretty low effort is asked from the employees, and the customers aren’t even rowdy. Put on your own music on the store intercom, vibe out, and enjoy your shift!

     Worst: Bad Word Meerca

     There is no amusement (or cucumbers or grapes or....) in this thankless job. Just sheer panicked screaming and sore throats, trying to protect Neopians from hanging out in basements or calling their uncles. Enough said. Let’s move on.

      Best: Shockwave Game Character

     Truly the pinnacle of working smarter, not harder. At this point, you get paid to show up, but 99% of the time, you do not have to do anything. Sure, you see a couple people each month and have to climb some ladders or chase away some slorgs then, but more often than not, you can just hang out and have a good time. Do you want to know the reason we haven’t heard from Hannah lately? She does not need to spend time hunting for treasure, when she can just cash her Shockwave-funded checks each week!

     Worst: Golden Dubloon Waiter

     You only have to visit the Golden Dubloon once to know why this is on our Worst Jobs in Neopia list. The Golden Dubloon is always packed, with people asking for reservations nonstop even though you keep telling them you are at capacity and the wait is unknown at the moment. Everyone expects quick service, and they don’t even savour the food! The pirates who stop by this joint don’t even tip, and the out-of-towners are always confused, trying to pay with something called a Neopoint? This place seems like a tourist trap, anyways.

      Best: Neopian Times Editor (sponsored™)

     We saved the best for last! A difficult yet highly rewarding job, the Neopian Times editors work tirelessly to put together the best issue every two weeks that it can be, and it shows! Surrounded by creativity, NT editors get to see the talents, visions, and progress of writers all over Neopia. Their job is to make sure the important stories get heard and talents get recognized. While this position can be competitive, since it is the premiere print publication in all of Neopia, that is part of the appeal! And after this many complete, glorious issues, the Neopian Times is still flourishing and evolving as the times change, adapting along with its reader-base. Who said that print was dead?

     After covering the best and worst jobs in Neopia, we hope that this guide helps you in your job search! Now, go check out the classified ads section and remember that there is a reason the Neopian Postal Service is struggling!