Little Less Conversation, Little More Trading Action

Restocker: Someone with nothing better to do but to refresh the shops until the Kaus come home. Their Internet browser quits every ten seconds from the pressure of trying to catch a faerie doll in the restocks.

The Trading Post is like one big ball of cheese. You have to pick out the rotten bits. Sort through all the chain letters that weigh the post down like a Skeith on a ball and chain, making it painful to find proper trading lots.

Chain Letter: Medieval garb which drags down the fun experience of trading. Report fashion offender immediately.

Scam: Pity me! Buy my overpriced items before my pets starve from the lack of Rarity 99 Gourmet Food I normally feed them.

Trading Lot: What you put up to sell a item or items. L337 or n00b items? Either way, your Red Aisha Morphing Potion still seems to be worth 1k, a Bottle of Red Sand and an Usuki Music Box.

Apart from the Trading Post, there is a Neochat board called Trading/Auctions where restockers brag about their restocking achievements and artful dodgers bluff innocent people with their tricks. Some get reported, some slip away. Often people advertise good deals on buyable unbuyables in their shops or trades.

K: K represents 1000 Neopoints. OK? Okay? No, your Language Arts teacher lied.

Reported:“Your noob/spammer/scammed/purple, cheese obsessed monkey has successfully been reported. Have a nice day and a guilty conscience.”
You are now an official Tcer.

Unbuyable Buyable: Lookie, here! Someone priced their Moltenore at 10k, no. Not questionable at all. It happens all the time. Aw, shop owner if you think I ripped you off I can sell the Moltenore back to you for the price I paid and afterwards buy it from you again at 99,999 NPs. Will that make you feel better, sweetie poo?

If you’ve dealt with me on the trading post, you’ll know I love to make everything as complicated as possible for what I’m trading. If necessary, I’ll make sure the other trader walks over hot coals for me to please my selfish ways. Why should I respect less, everyone else treats me that way?

How would you feel- if for three days you burst your gut to sell your Hannah Poster. At the time when you purchased this item you thought, ‘Hey, this would be a great investment! Ah... As a Mystery Pic prize limited to first 500 people who answered it correctly, this would be quite a valuable item in the near future. Limited Edition and Retired items will only go up in price? Please say that's true!’

A good selling point is to be online most of the day during the duration you send your item for so you can accept your offer for the impatient buyer on the other end of the deal. If your lot isn’t active, people are more likely to bid on it. With that theory, I keep a lookout for bids on my Hannah Poster.

Limited Edition: Available for a limited short amount of time. Like Sloth’s temporary baldness cure.

Retired: This item was boring when released, so Neopets retired it just to see if it would spark more interest. Re-tired? You hope you don’t end up receiving up covered in silly string.

Inactive: This lot is chilled in a space time continuum and will approximately disappear in a Virtupets black hole in about 2 weeks and warped into the user’s inventory. Never to return again unless the lot gets put back up.

After a million attempts at putting your trading lot at different intervals. Each time making sure to disguise your lot as a NEW, FRESH and ORIGINAL lot! (You’d hate to tire people with the same old monotony and sale pitches time and time again )

Hey, you could make up some cheesy (don’t forget your drackonick-nacky) wishlist and say you may consider ‘hard to sells’. Mind you this is just a little fun to attract those hard to sell traders. You don’t have to, it just adds to the fun meter.

Wishlist: A list of unreasonable demands you wish to be met or their buyer’s Sloth plushie gets whacked.

Hard to Sell (or HTS): Can not even attract a bid of hundred Neopoints for the possessed Limited Chia Devil Plushie?

You look up the auctions and other trading lots for the price range of the item you are selling. Many say in their lot descriptions they are willing to haggle, some are NTF and others are only looking for trades of pure Neopoints or rarity 99 items. Some prices are inflated excessively that is obvious they are trying to up the price of their item.

I priced my poster at about 125k while there was another at 150k and few others between 200-300k. Very few takers, I got an offer when off my computer to grab a snack. Poof! Some impatient person withdrew their bids after a few minutes. Meh.

Hag-gle: An ancient old Kyrii wants to strike a deal. You strike a deal, if she stops pestering you via Neomail, you’ll part with your Fountain of Youth book cheap.

Not for Trade or Sale (NFT or NFS): This item was put up just to see how much stupid people would bid on a lot that was not actually not for sale or trade in the first place.

Rarity 99: A pitiful excuse for charging over the top prices in case people get this item in a quest. Jhudora and Illusen have some kind of alliance with Rarity 99 traders on the post. Rolling in the dough. Moolah, cash. Give it a month to sell.

Inflated: People raise the price of the item that is already 400k too much.

Subsequently I had set the price Hannah Poster to be an buyable unbuyable in my shop. Oh, Pooh_pooh_caca sticks! No takers.

Eventually it went back to the trading post, I received an offer of 90k on the stupid poster. Thanks, you wanted to press my buttons and time a little more Neopia. By now, I figured my chances selling it were beyond my patience.

One time I had another horror experience trading with a Deckswabber card to sell. Nightmare on Easytosell Street, anyone? Yeah, it was hard to sell. Never again. Too bad, it wasn’t a paint brush. They sell like hotcakes those things.

Easy to Sell (or ETS): An item that should be easy to sell but a trader will do everything in their path to convince you otherwise- that their only one on the post, no price on it, hard to sell TCG card is actually very easy to sell. Sure you have seen them trying to flog it off for a week to some unexpectedly, foolish buyer but you are SUCH a talented trader you should be able to sell it easy. Yeah, right.

PB: Pain Brush. I plead with you! Someone take this item away from me before I go something drastic! If the bids do not roll in this, goes straight to the Money Tree. The pain part comes into the equation where all the newbies faint when the people with a fast Internet connections jump on the brush like a rugby scrum.

Next time, you are on the trading post! If you are buying, Buyer beware when you have cash to spare!

If you are selling, good luck and crappy trading! No, that was intended to be happy trading. Oh, forget my humour is lost on you little ones.

Thank you for reading my article and rant on the trading post! Any comments or tomatoes, feel free to send them my way. If you prefer I like glass roses, send them.