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Invisible Pets - Fact or Fiction?


by silvra

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(UIP= Unidentified Invisible Pet)

A bump in the side when you're walking down Main Street; you stumble over a tail that's not there. I believe we've all had (rather embarrassing) encounters such as these with the invisible Neopet. You can't see them. In fact, you can see right through them. But while they're sitting there, in all their invisibility, eating a Chia pop and waiting for their next unsuspecting victim, you begin to wonder.

What is the invisible pet really like?

Well, lucky for you, I'm here with the inside scoop on the bothersome little fiends. Today I will be walking around, and hopefully I'm going to trip and fall on my face. Well, I mean, over an invisible pet. How else am I going to find one? You have any better ideas? I thought so.

Anyway, back to business. Today I'll be walking around one of the busiest places in Neopia. That's right, the auction house, in the paint brush section. It's almost certain that if you wander around for a bit, you will find a discontented invisible pet owner. Sick of their pet's continuous pranks and pokes and prods, they will be looking for a new color. Actually, any color.

Invisible pets are usually quite unhappy with their color the first few days. "Who's gonna see my marvy new hair style?" "What's the point of getting up in the morning when no one can see my bright smiling face?" (Those of you who are Neopet owners know that that is not the case. But it sounds good, doesn't it?)

Their friends can't see them, their parents can't see them, they can't even see themselves. But then it sets in that... no one can see them. And the possibilities are literally endless. Door after door after door is opened to them and their scheming ways. It starts with a harmless little prod in the back. Changing the speakers on and off and generally being a household nuisance. But then their ideas get bigger.

Neopets trip over air, things starts flying through the air. Sweets from your secret stash go missing right under your nose.

Silvra: HOLY ALTACHUCK!

Aha! I told you it would work, didn't I! I fell rather gracefully onto my hiney if I do say so myself as well. Come on out, you conniving little Neopet! This is the part where he tries not to laugh to, I love it, shush...

Silvra: You just tripped me! I can hear you giggling!

UIP: I did not!

Silvra: Gave the game away now, didn't you? Anyway, normally I would totally pull out my awesome kick-buttocks training I received from that old Techo dude at Mystery Island, but as it turns out, I won't obliterate you if you grant me an interview.

UIP: Alright, cool. That's fine with me, I guess.

Silvra: Alright then. What Neopet species were you originally before you were painted Invisible?

UIP: I was a Lupe. Blue, handsome, charming, and then one day I couldn't see myself.

Silvra: ... Right then. Why exactly do you feel the need to trip unsuspecting Neopians? I mean, it must be fun and all, but don't you feel a bit guilty? What if some little old Kougra drops her groceries or something?

UIP: Pfft. I'm not that mean. I suppose I trip people to get attention. They can't see me, and they get a tad creeped out talking to air. I have to do something to get recognized, y'know?

Silvra: Ah, I see. So you'd say that you trip people because of a deep rooted mental instability that is the result of being painted Invisible?

UIP: ... No. Did you just call me mental?

Silvra: Next question, does it make it hard for your owner to take care of you? What if you get sick? Do you ever end up with sparkly pink shoes on your ears instead of your feet?

UIP: Nah. I've taken over my medicine and all. Started that when I got an injection someplace unpleasant. It's still sore too.

Silvra: Lovely... Would you say that being invisible makes you antisocial? Do you still have all your friends?

UIP: I'm not a social outcast just because people can't see me. And I'm NOT mental. After the first few jokes, my friends got mad at me. So I stopped.

Silvra: And do you not care that the people you trip are getting mad?

UIP: I don't stick around long enough to find out. Sometimes Neopets can get a really good swing in with their celery, in my general direction, then it's all over.

Silvra: Ouch. Now I feel the need to disprove a few Invisible Pet Urban Legends. Is it true that invisible pets are recruits of the evil Doctor Sloth, and that they are evil themselves?

UIP: Of course not! Have you seen that guy lately?! He's green! And a sloth! What the heck is a SLOTH?!

Silvra: Are your pet page pictures just blank blue circles, or did the Neopets team really draw all you guys out in white?

UIP: Well, you know, your making me feel a bit pressured here, I don't feel that I should divulge the inner workings of Neopia to a mere field reporter...

Silvra: Ten Neopoints says tell me.

UIP: ... You're going to bribe me with ten Neopoints?

Silvra: If you answer in a whispery sort of tone I'll move it up to twelve.

UIP: ...

Silvra: Alright fine, next question, how do you get random events if no one can see you?

-five minutes-

Silvra: Hello? Umm... hello? Did you leave?

-another five minutes-

Silvra: Errm... right then... toodle pip.

Alright, I admit. The interview didn't help too much. But it did give me the wonderful chance to talk with a mental Neopet. No offense. I never did figure out who that pet was either, so if you have a cheeky invisible Neopet who used to be a blue Lupe, keep him tied or something.

The point to this article is that Invisible pets are, and probably always will be, a complete mystery. And nuisance. But we must remember, that deep inside, these pets are broken up, deprived, attention hungry young pets who just need a hug.

Actually I lied. There is no point to this article. Let's get some pie.

 
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