Battle Quills... ready! Circulation: 192,171,935 Issue: 634 | 28th day of Awakening, Y16
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The Villains' Meeting


by tj_wagner

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The inky blackness of the night stretched over the land like ebony fingers that stole even the faintest of lights. The moon hid its face, as if in fear, behind the clouds and not even the stars dared to show their twinkle. Petpetpets didn't sing their nightly serenade of the night and there was not the slightest hint of wind. All through the Haunted Woods was still and silent.

      The only activity was deep within the stone walls of Count Von Roo's castle. In the innermost room, a roaring fire added flickering, sinister light to a large oak table and the varied group that set about that table. Had most of Neopia stepped foot into that room, there would have been panic for those sitting around the table were feared for their cold hearts and sinister deeds.

      Count Von Roo sat at one end, drumming his fingers impatiently on the wood. The Blumaroo seemed annoyed that he was not at the head of the table since this was, after all, his abode, but he said nothing aloud. He simply narrowed his beady eyes as he looked around at the others.

      Next to Count Von Roo, the Shadow Usul sat as silent as the night itself. She barely moved in her seat, and the casual observer might have thought she was nothing more than a trick of their eyes – a figureless absence of light. There was a sheet of faded parchment lying in front of her, and she was reading over it to her herself.

      Vira had the next place at the table, but the Acara seemed more concerned with her own appearance in the mirror she gripped tightly in her paws to pay any attention to those around her. She occasionally mumbled something about the lack of light in the darkened room as she leaned her body towards the fire. The flickering firelight complemented her features.

      The Pant Devil hovered rather than actually sat in the spot across from Von Roo. As usual, the blue specter said nothing as he looked about with his ghoulish grin. He occasionally laughed softly, and the sound echoed off the walls and high ceiling. It reverberated until it sounded like a hundred Pant Devils haunted this room.

      Also not sitting was the Spider Grundo. The experimental creature had created a massive web in the corner of the ceiling that hung like ruined lace and from this position he looked down on the others. He didn't seem to be in any sort of hurry as he waited.

      Jhudora, on the other hand, seemed to be very impatient. She rarely left her bluff, and it was obvious that the dark Faerie was uncomfortable in this environment. Every few minutes she would use her expertly manicured fingers to pick imaginary dust and dirt off of her long gown. Her amethyst eyes flashed in the dim light and she chewed her bottom lip as a sign of her discomfort.

      At the head of the table, looking completely confident in this role, was Dr. Frank Sloth. He laced his fingers together as he looked at the assembly and smiled darkly. While there were still other miscreants who had declined their invitation to this group, this was still the darkest and most evil group in all of Neopia. Separating his laced fingers, he picked up a gavel that was setting nearby and rapped it soundly on the table. All eyes turned towards him as if they were one.

      "I hereby call this meeting of the Dark Seven to order," he announced in a deep baritone, "First order of business is a review of the minutes from the last meeting."

      The Shadow Usul nodded and picked up the parchment. "Last meeting was called to order two minutes after midnight on the 11th day of Awakening, Year 16," she began. Her voice was a dry whisper that crackled like autumn leaves. "Minutes from the last meeting were read. New business of a plot to end Valentine's Day was introduced. A plan was not decided during this meeting. Old business was then discussed. Plotting the downfall of Illusen was denied as it would attract too much attention. Small actions to slowly control Neopian economy was discussed and plans to implement these actions were decided. A motion to end the meeting before sunrise was made and seconded. Meeting ended at 4 A.M. on that same day." She sat down.

      "I still say we could take down Illusen," Jhudora mumbled, but no one acknowledged her.

      "Excellent," Dr. Sloth said, "Now, is there any new business?"

      "There is someone that wishes to join our group," announced Vira, watching as her reflection spoke, "She's waiting outside."

      Dr. Sloth leaned forward. "Interesting," he said, "but you know we don't take newcomers readily. It would require a name change after all."

      Vira nodded, "I know," she said, "but I was impressed by this girl's tenacity. She actually looked me up just to ask to join. That takes guts."

      Dr. Sloth nodded in agreement. "I suppose. Send her in."

      Vira got up and walked over to open the heavy, double doors that led to the room. She returned to her seat, being followed by a small Stealthy Ixi. Her features cloaked and secret, the Ixi walked into the room strongly and stood in front of the fire.

      Everyone stared at her for a few minutes until Dr. Sloth suddenly burst out laughing. "Surely you must be kidding," he announced, "You're far too small to be taken seriously as a villain." Both Vira and the Shadow Usul whirled to look at him for neither of them was very large, but they didn't say anything in the Ixi's defence.

      "I am small," agreed the Ixi, "but I'm also fast and smart. If I don't want to be seen, no one will see me."

      "And what sets you apart from any other Stealthy Ixi?" demanded Sloth, "What would make you a good villain?"

      Beneath her mask, the Ixi smiled. "I have a dark heart," she said, "I like to see and hear the suffering of others."

      There was a murmur of agreement from the group, but Dr. Sloth banged the table with his gavel to bring silence. "I'm not convinced," he said, "You're no villain. You just like to pretend. Get out of here! You'll never be one of the Dark Seven."

      "I'm sorry you feel that way," stated the Ixi, "but it is your choice. Just to show that there are no hard feelings, you can have these." She produced a box of muffins. "I was going to give you these to celebrate me being a part of your group, but you can have them anyway."

      The Pant Devil grabbed the box greedily and shoved some of the muffins into his gaping maw. Soon, everyone had taken at least one muffin, and all agreed that the treat was delicious. "You see," Sloth said, "This proves it. No villain brings goodies for others to enjoy. Get out of here before I lose my temper with you."

      The Ixi nodded slightly and left the room. Soon, they heard the closing of the large doors that led to the outside of the castle. The newcomer had left.

      "That was a waste of time," Sloth mumbled, "Now, is there any more new business?"

      Before anyone could answer, his stomach rumbled loudly and painfully. He could hear his companions' stomachs doing the same as they all moaned. Suddenly, everyone jumped up and made a mad dash out of the room and down the hall.

      Outside, the Ixi heard the commotion and laughed. Her bran raisin muffins had been filled with her own special formula she had made in a chemistry class years ago. It was guaranteed to keep you tied to the bathroom for at least a week. Casually, she walked away as she twirled the key to the padlock she had used to lock the only bathroom in Von Roo's castle. "And they didn't think I had what it takes to be a villain," she said to herself as she disappeared into the night.

The End

 
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