Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 140,357,144 Issue: 294 | 1st day of Relaxing, Y9
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Fyora's Fashion Secrets

by absdafabs


Fyora, the queen of the faeries. Sun gleams off every strand of her perfect hair. Crisp, ironed clothes and gleaming jewellery. No neopet wouldn’t willingly throw themselves to the Snowager while it is awake in order to acquire the knowledge of the secrets of Fyora’s dazzling good looks.

Upon interview, Fyora refused to disclose any information on this issue to us. She made it quite clear that she is the only person who knows her secrets and that is the way she wishes it to stay. However, we love having a nose around in other people’s business and this case was no exception. So, using the great power of our imagination, we will just have to consider all of the possible options and display them here to you. In order to aid you in your quest to decide which possibility you wish to choose to take as the truth, the odds of each suggestion being the truth will be written underneath the options along with some points you may wish to consider in your decision-making.

1. Inside her castle, Fyora has a team of thousands of devoted fans who voluntarily iron every crease from Fyora’s clothes and vigorously comb every hair into place. The obsessive fans also give Fyora frequent face massages and put face masks on her every five minutes when she isn’t busy.

This has about a one in fifty chance of being the truth as we never see Fyora’s fans either arriving or returning from their work; however there is a slither of a convincing argument within this suggestion.

2. The other faeries are forced to come up with numerous beauty fluids and formulas to improve Fyora’s image. Fyora will watch them like a hawk as they aimlessly toil over bubbling cauldrons, sweating in the sweltering heat of their workhouse. Standing nearby, Fyora has a sharp whip ready in her hand to discipline any faerie who lags behind the others.

Seeing as the well known faeries (Illusen, Jhudora etc) frequently hand out quests to unsuspecting neopets and we can always see them in places such as Illusen’s glade and Jhudora’s cloud, they would never have time for all the hard labour in Fyora’s castle. On the other hand, it could be just the faeries we don’t know as well and those completely unknown to us that are cruelly forced to take up this task.

3. Fyora wears a wig! Fyora’s clothes are magically always clean and she is the proud owner of a very convincing mask.

Although there is no evidence of this somehow ridiculous accusation, it is, nevertheless, still a strong possibility as many Neopians are believed to wear wigs but will never admit to it. To our knowledge, there is nowhere in Neopia where a proper face mask can be obtained and bought; however, we are talking about Fyora and she may have had it custom made by a traveller from far away or even sewed it together herself even though she is not known for being that good at needlework.

4. Using her magical abilities, Fyora has composed a series of spells which enable her beauty to flourish. These spells are cleverly hidden inside a series of labyrinths and mazes to which Fyora, and only Fyora, knows the solutions.

This could easily be the truth as Fyora owns a massive castle that towers over everything; nobody knows the true size of it. So, there would not be any such trouble with the amount of space required for mazes on such a large scale. Also, Fyora has tremendous magical abilities and would easily be able to make such spells. On the other hand, it would be difficult to grow hedge mazes very quickly, even with Fyora’s magical abilities, resulting in the labyrinths becoming very easy and a lot less challenging.

5. Fyora could have an invisible force field surrounding her that protects her hair from the wind, her clothes from dirt and mud and contains an anti-aging element that enables Fyora to grow older without actually looking any older.

This is a good suggestion; however, many Neopians have shaken hands with the Queen of the Faeries, and this implies that there cannot be a force field surrounding Fyora as nobody has ever felt anything in the slight bit unusual.

6. However, there is the slight possibility that Fyora is naturally pretty and walks and flies with such elegant grace that her clothes are crinkle free and not a hair on her head can possibly fall out of its place.

This would take a long time to perfect if you chose to practise such a technique. However, as nobody can even begin to estimate the true age of Fyora; she may (or may not) have had plenty of time to get her posture just right. There are no known books on this subject but Fyora is rather clever and could have just worked it out herself.

Many faeries are naturally pretty and their Queen could easily be no exception. The pink colour of Fyora’s hair is not a natural colour but could be achieved using magic very easily.

So, while you ponder over which suggestion sounds the most convincing, I think you ought to know a couple of reasons why you actually wouldn’t (or shouldn’t) want to know how the secrets to Fyora’s fashionable looks.

Fyora is the Queen of the Faeries; don’t you think she deserves to have her own unique look and to appear as the most beautiful? Even if you know Fyora’s secrets, many of them involve magic and, generally, normal neopets and owners like yourself will not be able to follow in Fyora’s footsteps to become the prettiest Neopian.

So, there you have it, all the possibilities, weird and probable, jotted down for you to see. If anybody has any other information on this topic, please contact the Neopian Times immediately! However, if I were you, I would keep it to yourself. Being the most attractive neopet surely must have lots of perks.

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