Be Careful When Painting Polarchucks!

The official description of a Polarchuck is "A jolly, plump, chattery friend for your pet." This is very true, until you paint one.

You see, with Polarchucks, it is crucial to match the personality of the petpet with that of your pet, or they will clash, as Polarchucks are very decisive, and they know when they don't like the pet they're with!

I have decided to feature five examples in this article, and you should be able to see what would be suitable for your pet if you are thinking of buying or painting one!

1. Tyrannian Polarchuck - not recommended in snowy situations

Tyrannian Polarchucks are a very friendly breed, in the right situation, and by far the cuddliest of them all. However, due to their thick covering of fur, they can no longer live in the snowy climate of Terror Mountain.

For this reason, they have somehow decided that they are a Polarchuck elite, and will no longer communicate with other 'lowly' Polarchucks, and in fact can be quite vicious when confronted with one. Those fangs are very sharp and painful to the other cuddly little Polarchucks, so be careful and keep them on a lead when roaming Neopia.

Similarly, they also despise snowy pets, so if you have a Christmas, Ice or Snow pet, then think twice before giving it a Tyrannian Polarchuck, as the memories of Terror Mountain will send it into a fury!

2. Disco Polarchuck - not recommended if you're poor or need lots of sleep

The issue with a Disco Polarchuck is not that it dislikes certain species; it is due to the fact that they are incredibly hyperactive and never, ever stop dancing or singing! They even hum disco tunes in their sleep, so if your pet requires a good night's sleep for their work the next day at the Faerieland Employment Agency then be sure to have a spare room to shut your Polarchuck in while it sleeps!

Another problem with these disco crazy creatures is that they are very fashion-conscious. While this may be great for those like-minded pets who love shopping and want a shopping buddy to take to Neopia Central with them, they aren't great for poorer Neopians, as they will demand the latest accessories and furniture. If you can't afford the Disco Petpet Bed, Disco Scratching Post, Disco Petpet Bowl and anything else that may catch this Polarchuck's eye, then you're better off without a Disco Polarchuck as they will never let you forget it!

3. Sketch Polarchuck - not recommended if you have poor eyesight

Sketch Polarchucks, as you may have noticed, are sketchy. This means that upon a patterned background, the pale blue outline is quite hard to spot. Far from trying to help you out by shouting out where they are, when you lose them for the millionth time on your shopping trip in Faerieland, they find your inability to locate them hilarious and will try their very hardest to remain unnoticed.

The only solution to this is to put a T Shirt on them, so that you can still spot them wherever they are. However, they sometimes take the T Shirts off and place them on random inanimate objects like a Blue Glazed Vase. This leads to many embarrassing moments when you're out with your Neofriends and you suddenly run up to and grab a vase and start hugging it. You get many strange and puzzled looks, believe me!

So unless you have great eyesight or your Neofriends have a really good sense of humour, steer clear of the Sketch Polarchuck.

4. Dung Polarchuck - not recommended for those with a strong sense of smell or a small Neohome

You may be wondering why you'd bother with a Dung Polarchuck anyway, but if Dung is your style, then I'd better warn you about the risks (apart from the obvious stench!).

You see, this overpowering smell, while repulsive to most, is unbelievably attractive to some other petpets, for example the Selket, Grackle Bug, Teasqito, Flightning Bug and many more. Taking your Dung Polarchuck out results in you being followed by great swarms of these petpet admirers, all wanting to be best friends with your Polarchuck. If you think these followers are going to leave your petpet alone when you return home, you're very much mistaken. No matter how hard you try to keep them out, eventually they will work their way in through windows or unlocked doors, and soon your Neohome will be swarming with them.

On the other hand, it is nice to have a petpet that is so popular and if you have a large and spacious Neohome and love to host huge parties, then the Dung Polarchuck is ideal.

5. Plushie Polarchuck - not recommended for those without a sense of humour

Plushie Polarchucks are very cute and cuddly. However, they resemble what a Polarchuck Plushie would look like, (if one existed). Now that shouldn't matter much, should it? Well, it does, I'm afraid. Like the Sketch Polarchuck, they take advantage of their appearance to trick unaware Neopians.

For example, I took my pet to stay at a Neofriend's Neohome for the night, and of course, my pet took its Plushie Polarchuck with him. When I went to pick him up the following morning, one of my favourite Neofriends was shivering in the corner. She told me that Ghost Neopets had invaded her home and things had been moving around when nobody was in the room. After further questioning, she added that the item they seemed to be moving around the most was a Polarchuck Plushie, which she couldn't even remember buying.

It all made perfect sense then. Once again, the Plushie Polarchuck had been moving things around while the person wasn't looking, and then remaining perfectly still, like a Plushie, to trick them. My friend was reassured when I showed her my Polarchuck and I explained that Polarchuck Plushies didn't even exist.

Since then, my Polarchuck has been trying out this trick on everyone I meet, and I often have to make a sheepish apology to a petrified owner or pet, which can get a bit annoying at times. However, if, like the petpet, you find these tricks hilarious and love to catch people out, then this is your perfect petpet, where it's April Fools Day every day of the year!

So, there you have it, five clear reasons why painting your beloved Polarchuck may not be the best decision you've ever made. Having made out the Polarchuck to be an annoying, evil little creature, however, I would like to point out that the unpainted Polarchucks are just as cuddly and adorable as you might expect, so don't be put off buying one!

No Polarchucks were harmed in the making of this article.