Backhand: Part One

     "...so stupid, Julia, honestly, it's like you live under a rock or something; you don't get the most obvious stuff sometimes. You're so weird..." Christie says in a haughty tone, her striped Cybunny face scrunched in disgust.

     I'm not sure what to do. Why would she talk to me like this, abuse me like this? My hurt and sadness spread throughout me, threaten to overwhelm my thoughts. They show clearly on my face and leave me vulnerable to the world.

     Christie sees my expression and rolls her carefully made-up eyes. "Oh my gosh, you're so sensitive, Jules. I'm just kidding!"

     The words are out and the hurt doesn't leave. But I need her and I know I should trust her. Maybe I did something to anger her? She wouldn't treat me like this otherwise. She's not usually like this. Christie and I have been friends since middle school, back when we were both small, awkward sixth graders. She was my first friend after my family moved. She was nice to me when I was a yellow Aisha, not painted faerie yet. Our friendship began in history class, where we were seated next to each other. We'd work on assignments together, which led to us talking and getting to know each other. Before long, we became friends outside of class too, and we'd share secrets and stay up hours past our bedtimes sending neomails back and forth. Since then, we've been inseparable. Until recently, she's never acted like this – our friendship was strong in middle school, but since our first year of high school began, she's started acting strange and hasn't been quite as friendly. I don't know why, but I'm sure she's just adjusting to ninth grade – the past few months have been different from middle school. I know Christie and I do trust her; maybe she's right and I'm just overreacting to a joke. So, I smile, agree, and let it go.

     ---

      I'm walking in the library, looking for a book to get lost in. I see one on a shelf several meters away; it's an interesting-looking one. It's colored a deep red with a hard cover. Dulled gold text on the spine spells out a surely tempting title that I can't quite make out from where I stand. It calls to me and I answer, but before I can reach it, another paw reaches for it and pulls it from its peaceful place on the shelf.

     The owner of the paw turns to me and begins to speak. "Oh, hey, Julia! Did you want this? You can have it first if you want; I've already got a whole stack to read."

     I give a small smile and accept the book she holds out to me. "Thanks, Emily."

     The white Kacheek grins. "No problem. Oh! By the way, I've been meaning to ask you about something. I've just started with this theater group after school. Remember the terrible 'fight' in the play last year, the one that looked completely fake?" She makes finger quotes when she says the word 'fight.'

     I nod and allow a quiet giggle to escape. "Yeah... didn't Henry drop his sword in the middle of it?"

     "Yes, and it fell offstage! He had to dive after it!"

     The librarian's small, yellow, pinched face appears around the corner, displaying her stern expression. "Quiet in the library!" Her body is hidden by a shelf, but her long Lenny neck extends beyond it.

     My smile disappears and I mutter a short apology, but Emily struggles to halt her giggles. "Sorry," she mouths, her amused expression never faltering.

     "Anyway," she says, "they're going to be teaching a short class on stage fighting. You know, to avoid any more catastrophes like that one. You don't have to be in plays to join it, though. So, what do you think? Want to join me?"

     I'm unsure. I don't really like the idea of having to hit someone or do anything confrontational, much less act in front of people. I've always been a peacemaker, keeping the flames as low as possible at whatever the cost. I have two older siblings and one younger. All of them are exceptionally good at things; one of my older brothers, Carter, a Darigan Lupe, is a sports champions and has loads of Battledome trophies. My other older brother, Nathan, a green Krawk, plays a bunch of instruments incredibly well. My younger sister, Hannah, a cloud Usul, is extremely smart and has skipped several grade levels. As for me, all I've ever been really good at is being nice. I don't want to be confrontational; I'd rather not get people mad at me. I want people to like me too. I don't see stage fighting (or any type of fighting) as fun at all.

     Emily can sense my hesitation. "Please, Julia? It'll be really exciting. You'll enjoy it, I promise! Plus, everyone's really nice, and you'll make tons of great new friends."

     I really don't want to, but Emily's so nice to me. She's kind, new in town, and always trying to make new friends. Also, that's just how she is; she likes to help people and if anyone seems down, she'll try to cheer them up. She's kind to everyone, and if Christie's not going to be nice, at least I'll also be around someone who will be. Plus, I want her to like me and I don't want to disappoint her. With a small nod of my head, I agree.

     "Yes!" she says, and her face lights up with an infectious grin. No matter how much I'm dreading this stage fighting class, I can't help it – I smile too.

     ---

      I'm at home, curled up on my bed reading the library book. As I turn another page, I hear the ping of a new neomail arriving.

     It's Christie. Hey Julia, what's up?

     Not much, I'm just reading. How about you? I type back, smiling.

     Nothing, really. So, are you ready for the chemistry test later this week?

     Not at all! I have to study, I type, groaning at the reminder of the upcoming exam. The notes are really confusing.

     Really? I didn't find them too difficult. If you really end up needing help, I can try to explain them to you.

     Thanks! But hey, at least the notes aren't anywhere as bad as when we had that one substitute for Mr. Smith in history. I smirk at the memory.

     LOL Why did he even bother trying to teach us? He's a substitute! And we know why, obviously – didn't he try to teach us something completely wrong?

     I laugh. Yeah! He told us the wrong ending to the War for Meridell. Mr. Smith had to re-teach us half the unit to fix what the sub told us, remember?

     We send neomails back and forth for awhile and everything is like it was in middle school again. We're just having fun chatting and there are no backhand remarks, no snide comments.

     Oh, did you see the dress Alexis was wearing today? Christie asks. Wasn't it super pretty?

     Yeah, it was nice, I agree, though I really hadn't noticed. Alexis, a popular royalgirl Kyrii, wasn't really friends with me.

     Speaking of which – you know that the Homecoming dance is really soon, right?

     I start to nod, then realize she can't see me. Yeah. Why?

     Well, we have to look for dresses, of course! Want to come with me on Saturday afternoon?

     I don't really want to go to Homecoming, but everything seems okay between Christie and me again. She's invited me to hang out with her and I'm happy to do so, even if it means going to a dance.

     Hey, by the way, I type, glad she can't hear the nervousness in my voice. Is everything okay? You've seemed a bit different lately.

     Huh? What're you talking about? Everything's great.

     Okay, good. I smile, pleased that everything is back to normal.

     ---

      In French class, the teacher, Madame Dupont, a red Quiggle, has just assigned group work. I look around for partners, and Emily calls me over to her group. It's mostly made up of pets I don't really know and have barely ever spoken to.

     "Introductions!" she announces and proceeds to point everyone out.

     "This is Natalie," she says. Natalie is a small brown Meerca with glasses. "She's really nice and insanely good at languages."

     Next is Connor, an electric Kougra who plays basketball and likes acting.

     "And of course, you know Henry," Emily says, indicating the silver Gelert. "He's famous!" I smile, recalling the sword fight again. He blushes.

     Finally, she introduces me. "This is Julia. She's shy, but she's a really great pet. Welcome to the group!"

     ---

      Christie and I are in a fitting room at the mall and she's just put on a tiny red dress, one that doesn't look very good on her. She flicks her striped Cybunny fur back and eyes herself critically in the mirror, making a face. "I don't like this one on me. Want to try it on, Jules?"

     No. Not really. But I look at it as if I were contemplating the idea to appease her. "Er, no, no thanks. I don't really like it. Plus, I think it looks like it'd be a little tight."

     She laughs, and not in a very nice way. "True. Duh. Owner bringing you hope a few too many donuts lately, Julia?"

     The comment bites. Even though she brushes it off with her usual "just kidding!" I can't brush it off as easily this time. The feeling that something's not right lingers. Emily would never say things like this to me.

     ---

      I'm nervous about stage fighting. I'm standing at the back of the classroom with Emily and waiting for it to start. I don't want to be here.

     She notices my discomfort and gives me an encouraging smile. "Hey, don't be nervous, okay? We'll have loads of fun."

     I nod and hope she's right.

     Alex, the red Draik student volunteer teaching the class, tells us to pair off. I go with Emily. He demonstrates the fighting stance, and then the move we're to work on. It's a backhand slap. He crouches in his stance in a way that reminds me of the nature videos we sometimes watch in biology, of a Gruslen about to spring up and pounce. His partner, a yellow Lupe I don't know, holds a hand up near his face. Alex swings his right claw back towards his left, then brings it up above his head in a huge, arching sweep. It connects with the Lupe's paw with a resounding smack. The Lupe's head turns sharply in time with the noise. His reaction and realistic cry make me forget that it's fake; I honestly believe for a moment that Alex has just slapped him. Then, he tells us to try it ourselves.

     Emily holds up a paw and I reluctantly go through the motions of what I'm supposed to do. My paw hits hers softly. Alex, however, does not see my performance as satisfactory.

     "C'mon, Julia," he says. "Put some ferocity in it!"

     But I have none to give. I prefer peace. I do not do well in the lesson for today.

     ---

      After class, Emily tries to talk to me about it. "I know you can do it!" she tells me. "I believe in you! You've got some fierceness in there somewhere. What makes you really angry?"

     I shrug. I try not to be angry, usually - I want to keep things quiet.

     ---

      Christie and I are sitting in English class, joking and giggling over the book we're reading. "Hey," she asks me, "Do you want to come over this weekend? We can go swimming and hang out."

      "Sure!" I smile. "Oh, maybe we could invite Emily too? You know her, right? She's really nice."

      Christie makes a face. "Err... I don't know, Jules. I think she's kind of weird."

      "She's not weird," I defend, feeling uncomfortable. I twist one of my long Aisha ears in my paws and flutter my wings nervously.

      "Fine," she says. "We just don't really get along, I guess."

      I frown, but don't push the subject. I don't want to cause an argument.

     ---

      Stage fighting classes continue. I do not perform well. The only reason I haven't quit yet is because, despite the undesirable environment, I've really enjoyed spending time with Emily.

To be continued...