Neopia Central: The Musical!

     Scene 1: Movie Theatre Main Stage (decorated like a barn).

     Curtains open.

     Lyle, dressed in traditional garb, is centre stage.

     Spotlight on Lyle fades in.

     Band plays “If I Were a Rich ‘Pet” (folksy showtune).

     LYLE: (sung) I’d build a NeoHome with dozens of rooms,

      In Neopia Central’s centre.

      A maractite roof and marble floors.

      There’d be expensive furniture everywhere!

      To anyone who wants to enter,

      I’d say, “I know you wish this life was yours!”

      I’d fill my garden with Kads, Meowclops, and Candychans,

      For the land to hear and see!

      And being as noisy as Petpets get.

      Each of their cries and meows and angst and cute

      Would make all the others turn to me—

      And they would say, “Here lives a wealth ‘pet!”

      If I were a rich ‘pet!

     Band abruptly switches music to “Have I Made It!” (upbeat swing / soul / jazz / big band).

     Lights on.

     Many extras (choir) dressed in light winter gear rush onstage from both sides as the scene changes to Neopia Central (main, winter). Extras swoon over Lyle and crowd around Lyle. Lyle dances through the crowd and sings whilst signing autographs, kissing babies, etc. Extras snap/clap along to Lyle’s singing in rhythm.

     LYLE: (sung) Except that I have already made it!

      I’m already a rich ‘pet!

      Fame, fortune, and love surrounds me,

      How much better could things get?

      ‘Cause I know tomorrow

      I’ll just be in another show,

      Another day just on the set—

      I have no regrets!

     Agent, a white Techo dressed in a white pantsuit, enters from stage left. Agent finger-guns at Lyle.

     AGENT: (prose) Great job today my number one client, keep ‘em comin’!

     Lyle salutes Agent.

     Agent exits stage right.

     EXTRAS: (sung, in chorus) He’s the most famous ‘pet

      To ever sing, act, dance here yet!

      Neopia Central’s

      Newest hottest triple threat!

     Band vamps from “Have I Made It!”. Lyle and extras do a big choreographed dance routine, including some Rocket moves, while scene changes to Brynnso Christmas Special Set. Extras lift Lyle and Lyle crowdsurfs.

     LYLE: (prose) I’m big! I’m popular! I’m accepted! I’ve never been happier! Haha!

     Hanso and Brynn (or at least sufficient lookalikes) enter onstage from stage right, though they are largely obscured by the crowd.

     Extras set Lyle down on a chair and exit both stage directions.

     Band stops.

     BRYNN: (happily) So, Lyle, you’re the biggest new sensation to sweep the acting world and much of the whole of Neopia. You’re bigger than Zuzu, Brice, Conrad, Lisa… How does that feel?

     LYLE: (excitedly) Feels good Brynn! Real good! All those actors and actresses – huge inspirations to me. It means so much to be grouped with them.

     (Crowd applause)

     LYLE: (overexcitedly) And I never imagined I’d ever be on your show – I remember seeing your first Christmas Special and thinking, “Wow, one day I’m gonna be up there!”

     (Crowd “aww!”)

     LYLE: Much like tonight, it was a tootin’ good time!

     (Crowd laughs)

     BRYNN: (curiously) For how long have you been acting and singing and dancing?

     LYLE: (nostalgically) Since I was a wee little Kacheek, back on Mystery Island! I just always knew that one day I’d make my dream a reality, so about a year ago now I moved to Neopia Central.

     BRYNN: (squeeing) And everyone knows the popularity you achieved late summer as that dreamboat Kauboy Twisty!

     HANSO: (jealously) Hey, I’m right here!

     BRYNN: (matter-of-factly) I know.

     (Crowd laughter)

     Brynn goes and hugs Hanso. Hanso hugs back.

     (Crowd “aww!”)

     Hanso and Brynn release each other.

     LYLE: (excitedly) And now I’ve started playing one of the leads in Gobbler in the Barn. We had our opening night earlier this week.

     HANSO: (filled with his brand of charismatic innocence) You know, I learned that you actually auditioned to play me once. Can I hear you do that?

     (Crowd chants, “Do something! Do something!”)

     LYLE: (dramatically) Would a Magenorb by any other name smell as sweet?

     (Crowd applause)

     BRYNN: OK, that was good, but now do it more like this!

     Brynn hands Lyle a piece of paper, and then goes to retrieve a present under the tree.

     Lyle reads from the paper.

     LYLE: (hick) Would a Magenorb by any other name smell as sweet, adoyyy?

     HANSO: (frowning) Hey!

     (Crowd cheering and hooting)

     Brynn laughs as she returns. Brynn gives Lyle the present.

     Lyle opens it. Inside is nothing.

     BRYNN and HANSO: (in chorus, overexcitedly) Because we know you already have all you could want!

     (Crowd applause and laughter)

     LYLE: (charismatically) Anyway, because I KNOW you are all dying to hear me sing…

     Band plays “Rock It (Rocket) to the Top”.

     LYLE: (sung) Here I am with Brynn and Hanso,

      I have joined a lucky few!

      When not onstage or with my fans,

      I’m just doin’ an interview!

      I can put on a show, I know how to croon,

      And now I’m over the moon!

     Band transitions to “Have I Made It!”.

      Bein’ here, singin’ on this show,

      The biggest star oh don’t you know!

      Finally I’ve got my dream—

     BRYNN and HANSO: (sung, in chorus) Everything is just as it seems!

     Band vamps from “Have I Made It!”.

     Lyle dances about the stage.

     Many extras (choir) rush onstage from both sides and swoon over and crowd around Lyle. Lyle and extras do a big choreographed dance routine.

     Lights fade to black

     Band stops.

     Scene 2: Movie Theatre Main Stage (decorated like Neopia Central).

     Lyle, dressed in Nick Neopia-like fashions, is centre stage.

     Lights fades in.

     Band plays “Desire” (yearning / hopeful showtune).

     Lyle walks about the stage with a Red Poogle Hand Puppet on his hand. He sings whilst pupettering the puppet, creating the illusion that the puppet is singing.

     LYLE: (sung) Desire,

      It’s that crazy thing

      That keeps you reaching

      For something more.

      Desire,

      Pulls you here and there,

      Vainly searching for

      What you hope for.

      Everyone has desires

      What should mine be?

      (prose) Hey, a Random Event—!

      I found as many Neopoints as the year I was born…!

      (sung) It’s the universe telling me—!

      I will seek my desires!

      Don’t know where

      But I will find them!

      Gotta search,

      All about!

      Could be years,

      To figure it out!

      On a quest?

      Maybe at Kelp?

      With the Grass Faerie?

      Would BVU help?

      Life moves so fast,

      It’s a race!

      Gotta find my desires,

      Find my desires,

      My desires—

      Gotta find my place!

     Band stops.

     Lights fade to black.

     Band plays “Have I Made It!”.

     Lights on.

     Extras (choir) – about half the size as in Act 2, Scene 1 – rush onstage from both sides as the scene changes to Neopia Central (main, spring/summer). Extras, all dressed in summer fashions, swoon over Lyle and crowd around Lyle. Lyle dances through the crowd and sings whilst signing autographs, shaking hands, etc. Extras snap/clap along to Lyle’s singing in rhythm.

     LYLE: (sung) Except I already have my desires!

      A star so big, all know my name!

      Though, you know, I’m starting to tire,

      Every day kinda feels the same.

      ‘Cause I know tomorrow

      I’ll just be in another show,

      And though I’m still some fans’ fixation,

      They’re not the best for real conversation!

     Allison (soprano), an attractive albeit ditzy Aisha wearing a Mystery Island-infused summer dress, walks out from the crowd and up to Lyle. Allison holds up a poster of Lyle.

     ALLISON: (sung, pleading) An autograph, will you grant please?

     LYLE: (sung, smiling) As you wish, miss, ‘can with ease!

      And oh, what are you searching for?

     Meanwhile, Agent, dressed in their/her white pantsuit, enters from stage left.

     ALLISON: (prose) In life? (sung) Oh, I’m not really sure.

      I like fashion, but to what end?

      I’m content to just stay on trend!

     LYLE: (sung) Come on girl, open your mind,

      Share with me your bigger dreams next time!

     AGENT: (spoken word, to Lyle) Hey man,

      Don’t criticize your fans!

      We need ‘em all to keep you high-rate.

      (spoken word, to Allison) I’m sure your small dreams are just great.

     Allison opens her mouth as if to speak, but closes it with pensive curiosity.

     Agent makes a shooing motion to Allison, who runs along back into the crowd.

     Band vamps from “Have I Made It!”.

     AGENT: (prose, matter-of-factly) Now Lyle, I’ve booked you an interview tonight with a Neopian Times reporter.

     LYLE: (prose, sighing) Another one?

     AGENT: (prose) I know you hate doing them. Yeah, they’re not BIG, but I hope you realize that your BIG interviews are starting to dwindle.

     Lyle frowns. Agent pats him on the shoulder.

     AGENT: (prose, matter-of-factly) This said, any news is good news – you get coverage, and they get an author credit and a trophy. They’re mutually beneficial, win-win-win for you, them, and, importantly, me. (prose, grinning) Trust me, it’ll be good for you.

     LYLE: (prose, smiling) Alright, I’ll do it.

     AGENT: (prose) That’s my number one client!

     Agent finger-guns at Lyle.

     Lyle salutes Agent.

     Agent exits stage right.

     Lyle and extras do a small choreographed dance routine as the scene changes to Neopia Central (main, spring/summer), the Bazaar, and the Plaza (evening).

     Extras depart in both directions as Richard (countertenor or boy treble), a spotted Pteri in a blue suit, enters stage right and meets Lyle and centre stage.

     Band stops.

     RICHARD: (excitedly) Wow, it’s really you! Lyle!

     LYLE: (somewhat dismissively) In the flesh. Come on, let’s get on with it.

     Lyle and Richard walk slowly about the stage as the interview takes place.

     RICHARD: (warmly) Hi, I’m Richard.

     LYLE: (curtly) Charmed.

     RICHARD: (smiling) So, where were you born?

     LYLE: Mystery Island. (frowning) I think most of your readers would be aware of that, by now.

     Richard considers this and nods.

     RICHARD: (embarrassed) Yeah, good point. Sorry, I guess I’m just a bit new to the whole NT interviewing process.

     LYLE: (muttering under his breath) Yeah, you got that right.

     RICHARD: (smiling) For how long have you been in Neopia Central?

     LYLE: (tensely) Almost a year and a half, now. (annoyed) What, you’re an NT reporter, don’t you keep up with the news?

     Richard frowns sadly. Lyle takes a step back.

     LYLE: (apologetically) OK, sorry, I—

     RICHARD: (interrupting) No no. I mean, that’s fair. I should be sorry. I should be better prepared.

     There is a silence.

     RICHARD: (vulnerably) Look, Lyle, I know you don’t really wanna be doing this. But please? I moved here from Tyrannia a few weeks ago. I was looking for a change, for a challenge, and decided I’d try my wing at being a Neopian Times investigative journalist and reporter. (grinning) Chatting with people and covering events that matter to folks most, here in the capital of the world.

     Lyle seems more relaxed.

     LYLE: I see. (smiling) I admire your dedication and spontaneity, kid. You had a desire, and you’re chasing it down.

     RICHARD: (grinning) Yeah! I mean, I thought, “well, go big or go home, right?” So when I contacted your agent and asked for an interview, I was very surprised to have been slotted so soon. I just got moved to this city after all, and I almost immediately landed an interview with, arguably, still Neopia’s biggest star.

     LYLE: Well, thank you. Really. (wearily) It feels so long since I’ve had a chat with someone with real dreams – not just superficial “I loved you in this role, sign my slushie!” or what have you.

     RICHARD: (stupefied at that revelation) Oh, why, thank you.

     LYLE: (warmly) It’s always nice to meet people who just… seem to be going somewhere. (neutrally) I remember when that was me.

     RICHARD: (matter-of-factly) You may have reached the top, but I’m sure you’re still going places, Lyle.

     LYLE: (frowning) Yeah, down.

     There is a silence.

     RICHARD: Don’t talk like that. (encouragingly) You can do whatever you decide your desires are.

     Richard grins and winks at Lyle. Lyle smiles and winks back.

     LYLE: (smiling) Thanks for lifting my spirits a bit, kid.

     RICHARD: Anytime. Mind if we continue the interview?

     LYLE: Sure.

     Band starts playing “The Interview Song” (syncopated showtune).

     Lyle and Richard sing and do a lightly choreographed dance.

     RICHARD: (sung) Growing up, what was life like?

     LYLE: (sung) Since I was a little tyke,

      I was a huge drama nerd.

      ‘Twas an escape, things considered.

      (sung, smiling) My grandparents raised me to be

      Loving, caring, and carefree.

      (sung, frowning) But they left when I was young,

      Which hurt like a big pile of dung.

      My tribe was warm but friends I’d none,

      Life was oft devoid of fun.

      I was neither rich nor poor.

      But I knew I wanted more.

     RICHARD: (sung) How’d this become your desire?

     LYLE: (sung) Ever since I started choir,

      Being in front of a crowd,

      I felt happy, accepted, proud!

      To sing, dance, and act became

      My biggest dream. Fortune and fame

      Seemed something that I’d like to chase—

      Gave me purpose, gave me place.

     RICHARD: (sung) Do you have any regrets?

     LYLE: (sung, sighing) The short answer, well, is yes.

      To get famous, to get signed,

      I had to leave some friends behind.

      (sung, frowning) Though you’d think I can’t get enough,

      Back-to-back shows sure are tough.

      And I get weary, lonesome, tired,

      (sung, smiling) But it’s nice to be desired—

      Crowds invigorate me, still,

      Being top fills me with thrill.

      I’m financially secure,

      And the stage fills me with joy pure.

     RICHARD: (sung, smiling) It certainly sounds to me,

      That you are just where you should be.

      But if you ever want change,

      I know you’ll extend your range.

     LYLE: (sung, smiling) Thank you, kid, I ‘ppreciate

      Your skill to invigorate

      Me with a spirit renewed.

      You saved me from another bad mood.

     RICHARD: (sung) Well, I think that we now can cease,

      I’ve enough thoughts for my piece.

     LYLE: (sung, curiously) Anyway, I’d like to ask, you

      What you did before you came to

      Neopia Central, here?

     RICHARD: (sung, grinning) I was a sleuth of top tier!

      Investigating, interviewing,

      Learning what others were doing.

      Oh nothing could get past me—!

      But I got tired and the NT

      Spoke to me as a new pursuit.

      So I packed my bags en route

      To Neopia Central, far—

      I’ll be an investigative journalist star!

     LYLE: (sung, warmly) This interview gets a gold star,

     LYLE and RICHARD: (sung, in chorus, encouragingly) I’m sure you’ll go very far.

     Band stops.

     LYLE: (smiling) Anyway, I best be heading off, but good talking to you and best of luck with your article. I’m sure you’ll be able to re-hone your skills from Ace Detective to interviewer-then-article-writer!

     RICHARD: (grinning) Thank you so much, Lyle! And emphasis on the Ace, haha.

     Lyle chuckles.

     RICHARD: (warmly) Good night, Lyle.

     LYLE: (warmly) Good night, Richard.

     Lyle exits stage right. Richard exits stage left.

     Lights fade to black.

     Scene 3: Movie Theatre Main Stage (decorated like Lutari Island).

     Lyle, dressed as a Lutari, is centre stage.

     Spotlight on Lyle fades in.

     Band plays “Darkness” (melancholy showtune).

     LYLE: (sung) My inner peace is lost.

      Where is my light?

      I feel just stuck in the pound.

      Pounded, my soul feels tossed,

      Choked by the night;

      Wounded, lying on the ground.

      You said you’d stand by me,

      Whenever I needed aid,

      Because we’re the best of friends.

      So why can’t you see,

      That I have too far strayed,

      Toward destructive end.

      When will the darkness fall,

      And light shines through?

      Restless, I hope for the time

      When through the violent squall

      I again see you.

      Please, while we’re still in our prime.

     Band stops.

     Lights fade to black.

     A small handful of extras and Brice (bass), an elderly Ogrin, walk onstage and scatter themselves throughout the stage. They are all dressed in light winter clothes, though Brice’s outfit is gold-coloured. Meanwhile, the scene changes to Neopia Central (main, winter)

     Band plays “Have I Made It!” (with more melancholy than before).

     Lights on.

     LYLE: (sung) Oh, have I really made it—

      Reached peak limelight, peak success?

      Sure, but I’m tired of it,

      Mental health in firm darkness.

      This closing night’s been a blow!

      To a long string of poor poor shows!

      Soon I’ll be cast as who-knows-what

      Again when I just feel in a rut!

     Extras and Brice clap for Lyle. Lyle smiles weakly at them.

     Extra 1 (alto) and Extra 2 (bass) approaches Lyle from the crowd.

     EXTRA 1: (sung, smiling almost apologetically) Well there Lyle, you had a good run,

      And your career’s far from done.

     EXTRA 2: (sung, dismissively) But you know this city moves fast,

      Top stardom would never last.

     EXTRA 1 and EXTRA 2: (sung, in chorus) Though you lasted longer than most,

      So feel proud, we’ll raise a toast!

     Extra 1 and Extra 2 raise imaginary cups in the air.

     EXTRA 1 and EXTRA 2: (sung, in chorus) Now excuse us, we must take

      Our leave if we wanna catch Beebee Draik!

     The extras rush offstage in both directions as Lyle walks to centre stage.

     Band stops.

     Lyle frowns and looks toward the ground. He looks up and sees Brice approach him.

     LYLE: (awestruck) Wait… you’re Brice, THE Brice!

     BRICE: (sung, grinning) Guilty as charged.

     LYLE: (grinning) You’re one of the best actors in Neopia!

     BRICE: (neutrally) No, I WAS one of the best actors. (chuckling) I’ve been retired for 20 years.

     LYLE: (smiling) Still, it’s an honour that you came to visit my show. I loved you as Kaptain in A Space Western.

     Brice gives Lyle a roll of paper.

     BRICE: (sighing bemusedly) Yes, everyone did – and before you ask, here’s an autographed poster.

     LYLE: (beaming) Er, thank you!

     BRICE: (warmly) Anyway, though I’ve never approached you before, I’ve been to your shows here several times, Lyle. (grinning) I had to follow an up-and-comer and subsequently big-star. (cautiously) But you are now at a pivotal point in your career. Remember that. You are becoming replaced in the public eye, and what you do now will have longstanding effects on yourself and your happiness.

     Lyle frowns pensively.

     BRICE: (sagely) You are a person first, and an actor second. Do what makes you happy.

     LYLE: (appreciatively) …Thank you, Brice, for your advice.

     BRICE: (nodding) Now, I must also get going or I’ll be late for the Beebee Draik concert tonight at the Music Shop Hall, but it was nice chatting with you for a bit. (smiling) All the best to you.

     Lyle and Brice wave goodbye to each other. Brice exits stage right.

     Band plays “Replaced” (pensive showtune).

     LYLE: (sung) I never in my wildest dreams

      Imagined my replacement.

      I guess it was bound to happen…

      And yet I can’t say I resent

      Neopia Central’s new

      Star to shine on through!

      Beebee Draik’s an alright gal,

      I guess rap music is a hit.

      I much prefer the showtune—

      But I will certainly admit

      Neopia Central moves real quick, well,

      I guess this city’s just fick-el.

      Though this makes me wonder,

      Just who did I replace?

      When I entered the creative scene

      In Neopia Central’s space.

      But I do wish her the best,

      And hope for her success.

     Agent, dressed in their/her white pantsuit, enters stage left.

     Band stops.

     Agent smiles almost sadly at Lyle.

     LYLE: (shrugging) Maybe you were right, maybe I should have just morphed myself into a Lutari to better fit that role.

     Agent shrugs and gives Lyle a ticket.

     AGENT: Don’t dwell on what could have been. You were a great Lutari King. Anyway, here is your golden ticket for this Friday.

     LYLE: (quizzically) What for, again?

     AGENT: (excitedly) Why, for the grand opening of the Choxolate Baar, of course! The newest and trendiest upscale lounge in Neopia, built right into the Chocolate Factory. You know what they say—

     LYLE: If you can make—

     AGENT: (smirking) No, that nobody ever goes in… unless you’re in the IN crowd. And that, my friend, is you.

     LYLE: (frowning) Was me, more like it.

     AGENT: (sighing) Yes, you are no longer the biggest star in Neopia Central. But when I pulled some strings and scored you this golden ticket, you were. Just go out and have a fun time, OK?

     LYLE: (smiling slightly) Alright. I will try. (curiously) Wait, didn’t you say earlier that I could bring a guest?

     AGENT: (dismissively) I, er, ultimately had to route that second ticket elsewhere. Sorry friend.

     LYLE: Well… fair enough. (pensively) I’m not sure whom I’d bring anyway.

     AGENT: That’s… the spirit? (sheepishly) Also, I booked you an interview that, well, will probably suck. But he’s been wanting you for some time, and all the big names are currently interviewing Beebee.

     LYLE: (shocked) No, not—

     AGENT: (calmly) Yes, unfortunately, Dr. Sloth, for his podcast. (sheepishly) But hey, it could go OK! And to make it easier for you, I made him arrange the interview in the Catacombs – apparently he has a temp studio there. (smiling) Real good security, too – you’ll be safe, don’t worry.

     Lyle groans.

     AGENT: (straightforwardly) Anyway, Friday afternoon, you can meet him, do the interview, and thereafter get ready and head to the Choxolate Baar… Capisce?

     LYLE: (neutrally) Alright, whatever you say.

     AGENT: (matter-of-factly) And don’t party too hard. (warmly) Saturday, 4:00 p.m, meet me at the Theatre. You and I need to meet to discuss some of your career aspects.

     LYLE: (smiling slightly) Sure thing. Thanks.

     AGENT: (grinning) I’ll see you then!

     Agent finger-guns at Lyle.

     Lyle salutes Agent.

     Agent exits stage right. Lyle exits stage left.

     Lights fade to black.

     Scene 4: Dr. Sloth’s Underground Studio

     Dr. Sloth (or at least a sufficient lookalike) is sitting on a big plush chair, just to the right of centre-stage. Lyle, in a fancy black jacket, is sitting on a smaller plush chair, just to the left of centre-stage. Each has a Virtupets commentator microphone mounted beside them.

     Band plays light intro music.

     Lights fade in.

     DR. SLOTH: Welcome friends to another episode of Pinch. Of. Evil! Today, I have none other than Lyle – yes, that Lyle – here in person!

     LYLE: (hesitantly) Er, thank you, Frank.

     DR. SLOTH: (chuckling) That’s Dr. Sloth, to you. (excitedly) Anyway, fans are DYING to know how you feel about being usurped by Beebee Draik. I mean, she’s like half your age and a rapping superstar.

     LYLE: I wish her the best in her success. (tensing) But otherwise I don’t really want to talk about that.

     DR. SLOTH: (laughing) You heard it here first, folks! Lyle is upset about it. And why wouldn’t he be? He had absolutely tons of loyal fans for what, a year and a half? (accusatorily) And in all that time, he couldn’t even assemble them into an army to do anything useful with them.

     LYLE: (offended) Hey, don’t put words in my mouth, I never wanted to control my fans—

     DR. SLOTH: (interrupting) And to another question. Who is that Agent of yours, anyway?

     LYLE: (smiling slightly) A very nice person.

     DR. SLOTH: (grinning maliciously) How do you feel that she just signed Beebee Draik?

     Lyle opens his mouth as if to speak, and then closes it.

     DR. SLOTH: (teasingly) Oh, you didn’t know? Just yesterday. Yes, folks, you heard it here first, broken to you before the mainstream media! And Lyle there is just speechless. Just. Speechless.

     LYLE: (neutrally) Well, Beebee is talented. My agent knows talent when they/she sees it.

     DR. SLOTH: (grinning maliciously) And I’m sure they/she also knows when talent is declining and it’s time to get fresh meat.

     LYLE: (gritting his teeth) I think I would like to leave now Dr. Sloth.

     DR. SLOTH: (mischievously) Oh, but we’re just getting started! And besides, where would you even go? (castigating) You have no friends. You traded that all away for wealth and success. Yes, I have researchers for this podcast. I know about your little roundabout with that fashion designer, and that lighting fellow. When was the last time you even saw them, anyway? When you became popular?

     Lyle gets up.

     LYLE: (angrily) I’ve had enough of you and your podcast.

     Lyle throws down his microphone and storms out stage left.

     DR. SLOTH: (laughing) Well, there you go! Lyle lasted… what, 3, maybe 5 questions? Real novice at this if you ask me. I guess he couldn’t handle his – Pinch. Of. Evil! Haha, alright, well, thanks for tuning in everyone! Join me two weeks from now when I host AAA!

     Band plays light outro music.

     Lights fade to black.

     Scene 5: Interior of The Choxolate Baar

     Lyle, wearing a fancy black suit, is sitting alone on a stool at the main counter. The counter is just to the left of centre-stage but runs offstage left. Server, wearing a stereotypical fancy waiter’s uniform and polishing a sundae glass, is behind the counter but is otherwise nearby Lyle. There are some extras casually about and quietly chatting, some standing and some at tables on stage-right. There is a piano near the back of stage right. A pianist plays light jazz.

     Lights fade in.

     SERVER: (matter-of-factly) What can I get you, sir?

     LYLE: (groaning) Another double chocolate milkshake, please. Tall.

     SERVER: Coming right up.

     Server mixes the drink and passes him the glass. Lyle leaves some Neopoints on the counter. Server picks them up.

     SERVER: (trying to seem interested) Tough day?

     LYLE: (cries) The worst. I’m just a washed-up megastar. Sure, I have money, but no friends, nothing meaningful. I’ve been in a self-destructive spiral for months and I just want to be anywhere else in my life.

     SERVER: (smiling wanly) Yeah, and I hold a Master’s degree in Philosophy from BVU. Look at me now.

     Server wanders and exits stage left.

     Allison, wearing a fancy black cocktail dress, enters from stage right.

     ALLISON: (surprised) Oh, is it – it really is you!

     Allison walks up to him and sits down on a stool beside Lyle.

     ALLISON: (excitedly) I thought it was you from across the club floor, and indeed it was!

     Lyle just glares at her.

     LYLE: (forced smiling) Want an autograph?

     ALLISON: (grinning) No, I wanted to thank you! (pouting) You don’t remember me?

     LYLE: (sheepishly) I’m sorry miss, you look lovely this evening, but I haven’t the faintest idea who you are.

     ALLISON: (smiling) I guess that’s understandable. I know you had lots of fans… You still have quite a number, including me.

     Server enters from stage left (behind counter).

     Allison extends a paw to shake. Lyle shakes it.

     ALLISON: I’m Allison.

     SERVER: (to Allison) A drink, mademoiselle?

     ALLISON: (warmly) A Krawk Island Iced Tea, please.

     Allison leaves some Neopoints on the counter.

     SERVER: Of course, miss.

     Piano plays “Inspiration” (pop rock / jubilant showtune).

     ALLISON: (sung) I attended one of your first shows

      Of Quiggle Avenue,

      Where you told me I needed to open my mind,

      Dream bigger – you asked me to do.

      I thought for a while, but then I saw

      Your interview in the NT,

      I decided I’d interview fashion stars,

      And sought help from that ace Pteri!

      So you helped me see,

      My priorities!

      So I sought them to do—

      Desires, dreams, me!

     Server returns with the drink and takes the Neopoints. Allison scoops the drink and stands up from her stool. Lyle finishes his drink, leaves the glass on the counter, and stands up as well. Allison takes sips from her drink’s straw.

     LYLE: (sung, surprised, elated) You know you are the first to tell me

      I was your firm inspiration.

      To hear that I pulled you toward success

      Fills me with jubilation!

      So you must be a big interviewer

      To have a ticket for this scene!

     Allison finishes her drink and sets the glass back on the counter. Lyle and Allison do a lightly choreographed dance about each other.

     ALLISON: (sung) Well actually, my interviewing evolved

      Into a fashion designer dream!

     LYLE and ALLISON: (sung, in chorus) So I/you helped you/me see,

      Your/my priorities!

      So you/I sought them to do—

      Desires, dreams, you/me!

     ALLISON: (prose) Waiter, double chocolate drops, please!

     Allison slams Neopoints down onto the table.

     Server takes them and quickly comes back with two tiny glasses of pure chocolate malt. Lyle and Allison pick them up and pound them back before setting the glasses back on the counter.

     ALLISON: (sung) As a fashion designer,

      I’m just startin’ out,

      But interviewin’ gave me a great idea

      Of what people care about!

      It took some work, but I found a job!

      Apprenticing for a new star!

      And just like Richard, old friend-o-mine,

     LYLE and ALLISON: (sung, in chorus) I’m sure that you/I will go far!

     Piano abruptly stops.

     CHOCOLATE FACTORY SHOPKEEPER: (offstage) And she has arrived – the guest of honour tonight: BEEBEE DRAIK!

     The extras in the background and even the pianist make excited buzz and hurriedly exit stage right.

     LYLE: (grumbles) She’s probably here because my Agent gave her my guest ticket.

     ALLISON: (coyly) Well then, I should be thanking her that you’re here alone.

     Lyle smirks, then frowns.

     LYLE: (sighs) Well, are you heading over there too?

     ALLISON: (dismissively) Are you kidding? I can’t stand her! I mean, I like some rap music, but the heights she’s attained on her talent is unreal. Un. Real.

     LYLE: (smirking) Kaddy.

     ALLISON: (smirking) Rowrr.

     Lyle tosses some more Neopoints on the counter.

     LYLE: (grinning) Waiter, another round of drops!

     Server takes the Neopoints and quickly leaves and returns with two tiny glasses of pure chocolate malt.

     Lyle and Allison pick up the glasses

     LYLE and ALLISON: (prose, in chorus) Cheers!

     Band continues “Inspiration”.

     Lyle and Allison pound back the chocolate malt before setting the glasses back on the counter. Lyle and Allison stand up and do a choreographed dance together.

     LYLE: (sung) I’m glad that you danced o’er to me

      And glad the night’s far from done!

      You’ve stopped my self-deprecation and

      Replaced it with some fun!

     ALLISON: (sung) And thank you, for being some-

      One I’ve constantly admired!

      I guarantee I’m not the

      Only one that you’ve inspired.

      So don’t feel bad—

      Sure you’re not the brightest

      In the limelight now,

      But you’re far from your final bow!

     Band transitions to a bass-driven beat that vamps as Lyle and Allison order and sip chocolate drinks, dance, party it up, etc. Lights turn on and off in random colours/flashes. This goes on for several minutes in a montage-esque fashion; near the end, Lyle and Allison are very hyper on chocolate. Band continues “Inspiration”.

     ALLISON: (sung) Well in months of chasing my dreams,

      This night has been the most fun!

      What a start to my new fashion job,

      My life has only begun!

     LYLE: (sung) It’s been a wild time! Though you’ve yet to

      Tell how you got your ticket?

     Lyle puts more Neopoints on the counter. Server picks them up and places down two milkshakes.

     ALLISON: (sung, smiling) My employer won it in a design

      Contest but she did admit

      She didn’t want to come here,

      Something ‘bout an actor

      That she used to know—

      ‘Twas too hard for herself to go.

     Band abruptly stops.

     Lights go dark with spotlights on Lyle and Allison.

     Lyle and Allison stare at each other with neutral expressions.

     ALLISON: …It was you, wasn’t it.

     LYLE: (sadly) Your new employer is Morgan, isn’t she?

     Allison nods.

     ALLISON: (distraught) Sometimes she just despises you, said you changed, that you hurt her, that you broke a promise to her… I—I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. I shouldn’t have even come up to you—

     Allison starts to leave but Lyle catches her by the arm.

     LYLE: (sighing) No, no. It was time I faced this. Because I can’t say it to Morgan, I’ll say it to you. Maybe you can pass on the message.

     Lyle lets go of Allison.

     Band plays “Apologies” (yearning showtune).

     LYLE: (sung) When I think of her,

      I think of her warmly.

      She was my first friend

      In this newfound place—

      Neopia Central. I

      Never did intend

      To get so caught

      Up in the stardom,

      And forget where I belonged—

      To chase acceptance from crowds

      When I had it

      All along.

      I thought that a star’s life

      Would bring me joy most pure!

      But having lived both lives

      I’m not so sure.

      If I could get

      A do-over,

      Yes, I’d be a star again.

      At the very least, to inspire you—

      But I would choose to

      Keep my friends.

      I’m sorry, Mo and Zach,

      That you I did forget.

      Maybe one day, we’ll connect again—

      So I won’t have to regret.

     Band stops.

     Lights fade in.

     ALLISON: (sniffling) That was so sweet. I’m so sorry that that happened to you… it sounds like it hurt you a lot.

     LYLE: (pensively) It did – and has – and still does. But it sounds like Morgan, at least, is doing well. And maybe one day they’ll forgive me for leaving them to seek new heights of fame. I’d like to think so, anyway.

     ALLISON: (warmly) I know Morgan, at least. I’d like to think so, too.

     Allison hugs Lyle. Lyle hugs back. Lyle and Allison release each other.

     Silently, Lyle and Allison pick up and drink their milkshakes, looking at each other (or trying not to), contemplating their next move. They finish them and sets the glasses back on the counter. Server comes and retrieves the glasses.

     ALLISON: (demurely) Anyway, I have work in the morning, so I’d best be calling it a night.

     LYLE: (playfully disappointed) Aww, the night is still young!

     ALLISON: (smirking) Then feel free to walk me home. I might need the help after all the chocolate I’ve had.

     LYLE: (smirking) Why of course. And yes, I suppose the city can get dangerous – Money Tree ghosts and the Pant Devil and the like.

     Lyle leaves a big tip on the counter for Server. Server grins and nods appreciatively at Lyle and Allison before pocketing the Neopoints.

     Lyle and Allison exit stage right.

     Lights fade to black.

     Scene 6: Neopia Central (main), the Bazaar, and the Plaza (nighttime).

     Lights fade in.

          It can be choreographed in any fashion so long as it expresses/has the following: Lyle’s yearning to want to see Morgan and Zach; the resentment Morgan has toward Lyle; the friendship between Allison and Richard; Cockroach Towers vs. Lyle’s luxurious mansion; similarities/differences between Morgan and Allison, ultimately leading to a confrontation over their place in Lyle’s life and tearing his clothing to make fresh designs; Casting Director and Agent getting into a fight about how Lyle’s career should have went and/or is going, and Lyle begging them for help/development; Richard flying over them all, learning their secrets; streams of chocolate; Zach waving around lights, eating a burger, and rolling offstage; and Lyle and Morgan, standing by the Wishing Well, looking down into it, and then looking back at each other.

     It ends with the “real” Lyle running onstage and shooing them all away, scattering them offstage in both directions. However, immediately thereafter hordes of extras move onstage from both directions, crowding around Lyle like zombies. Lyle screams in terror as the crowds descend on him. At the last second, he escapes by jumping into the Wishing Well.>

     Lights fade to black.

     Scene 7: Bedroom of Lyle’s Luxurious Mansion

     Lyle is laying on his bed, stage left, though he is surrounded by the sorts of expensive things rich people have in their homes.

     Lights fade in.

     Lyle stirs and mumbles in his sleep, obviously suffering from a nightmare. He snaps out of it and sits up in his giant bed, panting, and puts a paw to his head.

     LYLE: (groaning) Oh, what a crazy dream! And ow, my head… last time I have that much chocolate in one night, at least for a while.

     Lyle looks around as if looking for something or someone, but sees nothing / no one.

     LYLE: (chuckling) Though I’ve said that before, I’ll see if I really mean it this time.

     Lyle gets out of bed. He walks to his door at stage right and opens it. There is a NeoMail there. He picks it up and opens it.

     LYLE: (curiously) Hm, it’s from Allison. “Thank you for last night. Sorry I had to leave early, work and all, but I had lots of fun. ;) -Allison” Ah, right, that’s where she went.

     Lyle looks at the grandfather clock by the door.

     LYLE: (dumbfounded) Wow, it’s already 2 in the afternoon! (panicked) I’ve slept in way late!

     Band plays an invigorating melody as Lyle rushes around to get ready.

     LYLE: (calmly) Alright, if I leave now, I should just be able to get to my agent’s office in time.

     Lyle slips on a casual jacket, opens the door and runs off stage right.

     Lights fade to black.

     Scene 8: Wishing Well.

     Lights fade in.

     Lyle enters stage right.

     LYLE: (sighing) Maybe it’s learning my agent hired Beebee Draik and I’m avoiding my meeting. Maybe it was that dream I had last night. Maybe it’s… everything. But SOMETHING called me here today.

     Band plays “Neopia Central Blues (Reprise)” (light lament / blues / emotional centrepiece).

     LYLE: (sung) I needed to be at the Well, at this time,

      As though the fates have guided me by hand.

      I’ve come full circle, bookended it, and yet I’m

      Sure only higher powers understand.

      Although my dreams came true to a wild degree,

      And I became the biggest star around,

      I lost myself along the way, and now see

      That I really did let my best friends down.

      Since I moved to Neopia Central,

      I worked so hard and never had a clue

      What I lost to get fame would drive me mental—

      Getting my big dreams have made me blue.

      Oh woe I am!

      What will I become?

      A B-list ham?

      A washed-up play alum?

      Mo lied – I wished my dreams to reality.

      I know the worst that's happened on a wish!

      Though my past self would certainly disagree—

      I have never been lower than this.

      Wishing on a Wishing Well.

      Wishing for a change!

      Oh Spirit of this Wishing Well,

      Here my cries of pain!

      I wish that I was elsewhere,

      Where my dreams have come true!

      I can almost picture there—

      I’m wishing, pleading, begging you!

      I ask you for a better life

      I ask you to be gentle

      Oh please remove by higher strife

      In Neopia Central!

     Band transitions to an instrumental version of “Neopia Central Blues”.

     Lyle approaches the well.

     LYLE: (prose) Oh Wishing Well, all I want is—

     Morgan, wearing very fashionable Mystery Island-inspired winter wear, enters from stage right.

     MORGAN: (prose, grinning) Tada!

     LYLE: (prose) Morgan!

     Lyle runs over to Morgan and hugs her. Morgan hugs back in an embrace.

     LYLE: (prose, confused) But what – why – how?

     Lyle and Morgan release each other.

     Band continues “Neopia Central Blues (Reprise)” (now richer and happier).

     MORGAN: (sung) I needed to be at the Well, at this time,

      As though the fates had guided me by hand.

      Just had a feeling you’d be here, and yet I’m

      Sure only higher powers understand.

      I’ve loathed you since it became clear that you would

      Rather spend time with your fans and your art,

      Plunging yourself in work and fame when you should

      Have been with those who held you from the start.

      But Allison told me what you sung to her,

      And showed me your remorse in Richard’s piece,

      Though I’ve not seen you since Goldrun! I know we’re

      Meant to be here, reconnect, and increase.

      When we met I was quick-tempered and callous,

      But you helped me to see the world anew!

      You hurt me when you left, and broke your promise,

      I broke mine too and should have stayed by you.

      But time again

      You have crossed my mind,

      Like every time

      I saw my breakthrough design!

      (sung, emotionally) I thought I’d become a pro fashion

      Designer just to spite you; then

      I thought back to

      All the times you

      Saved me from myself.

      (sung, compassionately) It has been 2 years since we met

      And though I’ve tried hard to forget

      I’ve thought about

      Reaching out

      To save you from yourself!

     (Fermata.)

     LYLE: (sung, forgivingly) I had everything I’ve ever wanted

      And ultimately learned my wants were wrong.

      The hollow adulations left me haunted,

      I wanted back where I truly belonged.

     MORGAN: (sung, smiling, forgivingly) You inspired my new apprentice so I’ll

      Throw you one and admit I was wrong too—

      That my hatred of you was juvenile;

      I’m sorry, Lyle, I accept, forgive you.

     LYLE: (sung) I’m sorry, Mo, and I forgive you too.

     (Key change)

     LYLE and MORGAN: (sung, in chorus) It’s nice that I again can call you my friend,

      I’ve missed you and the runabouts we’d do.

     MORGAN: (sung, encouragingly) And trust me – your life is far from its end.

     LYLE: (sung, encouragingly) And I know yours is trending upward too.

     Lyle and Morgan sing and do a lightly choreographed dance.

     LYLE and MORGAN: (sung, in chorus, warmly) We’ve had our ups and downs through these couple years,

      But now we can with confidence declare,

      That going forward, after all the dust clears,

      Our time and lives and happiness we’ll share.

      From now, for each other, we’ll be there.

     Band stops (on a high note).

     Lights fade to black.

     Curtains close.

     INTERMISSION.

      To be continued…