| teh 1337est n00zpaper |
Circulation: 194,100,740 |
Issue: 739 | 1st day of Swimming, Y18 |
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Short Stories
 | Create Your Own AdventureI always suspected that my Grundo had a sadistic streak. Years of serving as a commander in Dr. Sloth’s galactic marine corps will probably do that to you. But my hunch was confirmed the day Dark_breed_Hyren brought home an Adventure Generator.
by cosmicfire918 |  | The MarkIt was a gloomy day. Alex the Purple Draik trudged home with a huge burden weighing on his shoulders. With his head hung low, and his feet dragging in the mud, Alex heaved a sigh. I don't want to go home. I'd rather stay here than feel the wrath of my parents when I tell them what I got on my test today...
by noel3840 |  | Fyora's Day OffAll of the faeries in Faerieland look forward to many different events. Things like Fyora Day, Jhudora Day, Illusen Day, and The Faerie Festival are popular days that faeries spend all year looking forward to. However, there is a lesser known day that faeries also spend each year looking forward to, Fyora’s annual day off.
by she_chose_love |  | Beach, Burglary and Buyer's RemorseI don't know why it had sounded like a good idea. Maybe because Neoschool was over, all of my pets were happy, and because I'm missing several key parts of my brain that keep me from making bad decisions. Yeah, that's got to be it. Also by Special thanks to David, J, and everyone else who helped edit!
by queen_potema |  | The Slushie SlingerThe start of the Altador Cup XI had been marred with disappointment that had come with the realisation that match tickets were most definitely out of her price range, given her paltry student budget. But Kayennah the Krawk was not a quitter and some ingenious quick thinking had found her enquiring at one of the Slushie stands if they needed any extra help over the Cup season. And miracle of miracles, Kayennah was hired!
by tallydepp |
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"The Slushie Slinger" by tallydepp
Kayennah the Krawk couldn't believe her luck! Ever since she was a little Krawk, she had eagerly looked forward to the Altador Cup every year but, being so young, she'd had to content herself with sitting outside the stadiums, straining to hear above the frenzied crowds in an effort to decipher what might have been happening on the pitch. She had been in a rush to grow to an age where she could finally enter the stadium and watch the matches from the stands, cheering on her beloved team Meridell. However, she had given little thought to how she would be able to afford match tickets. In fact, this small detail hadn't even occurred to her! So the start of the Altador Cup XI had been marred with disappointment that had come with the realisation that match tickets were most definitely out of her price range, given her paltry student budget. But Kayennah the Krawk was not a quitter and some ingenious quick thinking had found her enquiring at one of the Slushie stands if they needed any extra help over the Cup season. And miracle of miracles, Kayennah was hired! Yes, Kayenneh couldn't believe her luck! Not only was she going to be able to watch the matches, she was even going to get paid for it too! All she had to do was serve the odd slushie here and there. What could be easier than that?
On her first day, Kayennah could hardly contain her excitement. She was one of many new trainees and, as she stood in line waiting for her new uniform to be handed out to her, she turned to the Neopet behind her. "Isn't this a dream come true?" she enthused. "Isn't the Altador Cup just the most exciting event in the whole Neopian calendar?"
Other Stories
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 Who Is This Topsi, and What Ever Happened To Zaira?
On Day 7 of the Y18 Festival of Neggs the festivities took a turn for the intriguing when Topsi was found buying weapons in Shenkuu. Eyewitnesses said he had been "muttering something about needing a new Katana." It reminds us that we know so little about Topsi, and there's a lot of suspicion on all sides.
by kaljinyu |
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 An Interview with the Grumpy Mummy
Today I’m here with the Usul Appreciation Club by courtesy of our dear fellow Usul Brains Mortigan, who has very kindly booked us an interview with the Grumpy Mummy of the Awakened faction.
by an9375 |
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 The Moderately Evil Faerie: Part Five
Jhudora ignored the stares of all of the faeries as she made her way to the Hidden Tower with Vanity and Spite flanking her. Her clothes were soaked with brine and her makeup was completely washed off. She had put her cloak back on to hide her wings, but she was sure almost everyone knew exactly who she was.
by rocksysmom |
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 Desert Requiem: Part Four
The Red Temple of Qasala was an impressive structure carved into the side of a sandstone cliff, and was one of the few monuments to escape major damage during the sandstorm of two hundred years ago. It was where the coronation of Qasala's rulers traditionally took place and housed the statues of the five founders of the city.
by kalnya |
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