There are ants in my Lucky Green Boots Circulation: 193,843,975 Issue: 718 | 5th day of Awakening, Y18
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Avatars That Will Never, Ever Happen!

I was cracking jokes on the Neoboards one day, talking about new avatars that would be absolutely ridiculous and completely unlikely. The other players were laughing along with me, proposing random and hilarious new avatars that are so silly that they'll never exist. Inspired by our merriment, I thought I'd write a Neopian Times article all about the avatars that will never, ever happen!

by indulgences
The Deserted Fairground's Top 10 Spooky Foods

The Deserted Fairground is not the most popular tourist destination in Neopia, especially not for its cuisine. Spooky Foods is a small tattered Pink stall ran by a rather spooky looking Bruce, but don’t let that fool you as this is home to some of the best delicacies available in all of Neopia, as long as you’re not too squeamish and willing to try a variety of different foods which don’t exactly look that mouth-watering.

by princess__neo277
Behind the Price

Prices. They are argued over, considered, loved and calculated every single day. But what makes the prices in Neopia? Why can we get one stamp for 10 NP but another costs us 300 million?

by kelly_d60
Is a Mall Right for You?

There is also another option that many may not consider: whether or not to join a mall. It can be a difficult decision to make, so consider these things before committing.

by katehoughtonbeckett
The Definitive Ranking of All Neopian Coffee Shops

Don’t have enough time to brew your own coffee at home? Consistently disappointed by your vain attempts to recreate your favorite coffee drinks? Need to go on a budget because of all the whipped cream you keep buying for said recreated drinks? I can’t help you with the last thing, because this article is all about how you should spend your money. Specifically, for spending it on coffee.

by bizniscorg
Petpet Matching for the Permanently Indecisive

Have you ever looked at a pet, paired with their petpet, and thought "They're perfect together!" only to do it yourself and find that "perfect" match to grow stale in a short time, maybe it just didn't "work" with their character, or maybe you just flat out decided you didn't like it? Ladies and Gentleman, I am here to state loud and clear you are not alone.

by fire_earth_aqua__77
Scientific Highlights: The Crokabek

Little is known about a majority of the Petpet species living in Neopia. For some, such as the Crokabek, this knowledge gap is particularly large. What is considered common knowledge in terms of their biology, including that of their disease vector status is, at best, a partial truth.

by parody_ham
“Like the Battledome, but a Bit Friendlier”: An Investigation of Secret Competitions

But before I could get up to leave the coffee shop to find inspiration for another poem to submit to the Poetry Contest, I witnessed a strange and even unusual occurrence. I was unprepared for what happened as an Elderlygirl Xweetok ordering at the counter, met the gaze of a small Krawk who was entering the premises.

by peacelovebliss
 
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"Letters to Goose" by chistise
Dear Goose, I hope you are well and enjoying your travels in Shenkuu. I heard the weather there in summer is nice and warm. I’m sorry that I haven’t written as often as I promised but I’ve been busy settling into my new home. My initial impressions of it were somewhat mixed but I’ve come to like it since. I’ve always wanted to live in an old, spooky mansion like this. I’m getting inspiration for my mystery novel every hour I spend here. I got rather a shock the first night I came here. You remember how awful the weather was just that evening. After you went off on urgent business, I went down the winding path to the house. I stumbled upon it just as I started to worry I had taken a wrong turn somewhere. I pushed open the gate with a tremendous creak and walked up the decrepit path to the house. Lighting flashed as I reached the door and I saw this great, bulky outline of the house looming over me. It looked like it could topple over at any minute. I almost turned back but by then I had already knocked on the door and it seemed impolite to retreat just then. I shouldn’t have worried for no one came to the door. I leaned up against it to listen for any footsteps.




Other Stories


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Letters to Goose
Dear Goose, I’m sorry that I haven’t written as often as I promised but I’ve been busy settling into my new home. My initial impressions of it were somewhat mixed but I’ve come to like it since. I’ve always wanted to live in an old, spooky mansion like this. I’m getting inspiration for my mystery novel every hour I spend here.

by chistise

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Food For Lunch!
. "Oh, Lunch," she replied, "you wouldn't like shopping, you're far too timid for those busy shops. Look at how everyone is pushing past one another, just to get the most expensive things on sale! No, you wouldn't like it one bit." They were sitting on the grass by the fountain of the Neopian Neolodge. A crowd had formed outside the nearby post office.

by tallydepp

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Lord Faerigan - Fyora's Role in the Meridell Wars: Part Four
Dear Queen Fyora, I am deeply troubled about Lord Darigan. It seems that he is under the influence of the orb or some other dark magic. In a brief moment of sanity, he said there were voices in his head. Other times, he’s overcome by rage, threatening to take out King Skarl and the entire Meridell Army. Everyone has tried to talk sense back into him but it doesn’t seem to be working.

by black_skull725

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Janet and Jane: The Case of the Framed Detectives: Part Six
Either he was very clueless or he was buying some time for something. No matter what, my mind wouldn't change. He was caught.

by chasing_stars44

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Eclectic Antics: Save the Chocolates, Part II
But the real question is: can you really use a frying pan as a weapon?

by amarettoball

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Lame Pun: Doing The Books
I'm Kinda Sorry For This One

by blackaavar



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