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Circulation: 193,565,809 |
Issue: 698 | 11th day of Gathering, Y17 |
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Headlines "Mission KatFL" by theschizophrenicpunk OPEN: KSSMO history files
OPEN: file no. 23-543-12, file name: mission records
OPEN: subfile no. 12, subfile name: closed missions
OPEN: file no. 355222, mission name: KatFL, mission status: FAILED
VIEW: read-only, mission no. 355222
VIEW: read-only, mission no. 355222, subfile C: description of the failed mission KatFL, taken via dictation, ver batim, from those involved
BEGIN TRANSMISSION:
Wally Katt (Director, KatFL Mission. Species: Wocky. Colour: Blue. Gender: Male.): I still don’t exactly know why everyone elected me as director. I ran as a joke. They said I was “qualified” because I’d led a similar mission via simulation run in some stupid spacecraft outside of Kreludor that only three people knew about, and that was supposed to require some level of Brain Tree-esque genius to complete – and my team survived. Which is just dumb.
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