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An Interview with King Roo

by impellent


Hello, everyone! I'm back with another new and exciting interview, this time with none other than King Roo! After seeing the results I got with King Skarl, he actually had to ask me to do the interview. Of course, how could I refuse to sit down with the notoriously bored Blumaroo who brought us all Dice-A-Roo? When trying to convince me to do the interview, King Roo even hinted that there might be plans for new games in the works as well, so there was no way I was going to turn down an opportunity to learn more. Without further ado, the following is a transcript of the interview that took place:

"Hello! Normally I like to start off my interviews by asking my subject to go on the record about their name, but I think in your case, who doesn't know that you're King Blumaroo right?" I ask, tentatively, hoping to jump right in to the deep part of the interview.

"Of course! Everybody loves Dice-A-Roo! And as King Roo, the Blumaroo, I do too! Hoohoohoo!" replies King Roo, laughing hysterically at his own joke.

"Good, well. I think we both know what I really came here to talk about. What can you tell us about the new game that you've been developing for Neopians?" I ask, hoping to cut right to the heart of the issue.

"Oh, that's not very fun! Let's play a game; can I interest you in a game?" asks King Roo, trying to deflect the conversation away from my questioning.

"Maybe after, but you know, King Roo, I came here to interview you because you told me that you had been working on something new. I, as well as a lot of other Neopians out there, want to know what you have been cooking up," I say, hoping that King Roo will take me seriously.

"Oh, well, I'm pretty sure I had something," replies King Roo nervously, ruffling around through some items he has near him, "Or that might have been a joke..." I hardly know how to reply to that, so for a moment, I just sit there stunned, unsure what to say.

"Actually, that probably was a joke," says King Roo, starting to mumble a little.

"And by joke, I mean I maybe sort of lied," says King Roo, adding on. Angry now, and feeling deceived, I am just about to open my mouth and reply when King Roo adds on one more thing.

"Actually, I lied," confesses King Roo rather anxiously, "I'm sorry! I'm just so bored all the time!" Angry about being deceived but feeling a little sympathetic to his cause as summers can be kind of boring if one is not careful, I decide to pursue a new line of questioning.

"Wow," I say, "that's really surprising to hear, King Roo. I think most people would guess from your cheerful disposition and sunny demeanor that you're always happy, all the time. So you're saying that you're not?"

"Oh not at all," cries King Roo, clearly distraught, "sure, I was happy for a while. Dice-A-Roo is a genuinely fun game after all, but all dice, all the time? You have to be kidding me! After a while, it started to get really boring! And I mean sure, for a couple of days during the Month of Giving, a few years back, it actually started to get kind of fun because it had been so boring before, but that didn't last very long... Except now I can't do anything about it because of my stock market company so now I spend my days, keeping a brave face, trying to love the game but secretly hoping something better comes along. Nobody knows about it, though, which is why all the Neopedia articles say that I still really like the game."

"Oh wow," I reply, "I'm very sorry to hear that. Well. Let's keep interviewing then okay? That will at least give you something to do for the afternoon and maybe if my readers like reading about you enough, I'll come back for a follow up. Let me ask you another question okay? What do you think about Count Von Roo?"

"You know, I'm glad you brought that up," replies King Roo, happy to be interviewing, "having our own local vampire Blumaroo on the island isn't as bad as you would think. Sure, he's a villain, but he's a big tourist attraction. Neopians from all around come to play Deadly Dice with him for that avatar he gives out. We even enjoy playing Faerie Bubbles together on the weekends when we find the time for it. He's kind of a nice guy once you get past the fangs and that silly cape he is always wearing."

"Wow! That's really surprising to know! I wouldn't have guessed that you both had such a good friendship with each other!" I say, surprised at what I'm hearing.

"Well," replies King Roo, with a weird look on his face, "I don't know about friends. I did tell you about his Deadly Dice thing right? Man is he obsessed with that game! I don't understand it really. The game is just a bunch of dice..."

"That's really interesting. I just have time for one more question but I think it's a particularly important one. Some of my readers want to know: does your tail ever get sore with the way that you bounce on it all day?" I ask, hoping to get an answer to one of the most popular Blumaroo questions out there.

"Well," replies King Roo, whispering, and leaning in closer, possible forgetting that I am recording this interview for all of Neopia to read, "that's just a trick we Blumaroos like to play on the tourists. Behind closed doors, we all walk on our feet. It's really pretty funny actually. I can't believe that Neopians really think we bounce on our tails all day. Tails... Of all the things..."

With that, I thank King Roo for his time and let myself out the door. As I leave, I feel a little sorry for the Blumaroo. He just is sitting down with another Neopian to start playing Dice-A-Roo again.

Well! That's about it, folks! I hope that you've enjoyed getting to know about King Roo a little more. I know that I did! Maybe with a little luck, someone will come up with a new game for King Roo and relieve him of some of his secret boredom after playing Dice-A-Roo for so many years. Well, that's all for now!

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