A Fine Day at the Lab Ray

Lab Ray (n) - A device designed by some totally whacked scientist that can change the stats, color, species and perhaps gender of any pet it zaps. However, it is in a hidden place that only few can access, unlike the Hidden Tower, which is a hidden place anyone can access, or Jelly…*BLOCKED*

Now that the first question has been answered and that the next ones will be answered later on, I think there's another one buzzing in your brain. "Is Kat lying?" Oh, please. If I weren't telling the truth then this article wouldn't be published in the Times in the first place! Well, here's the inside scoop on this thing called The Lab Ray…this article covers the basics of mastering the goofy gadget…the experts can just leave this article alone…

This ingenious invention can be found by collecting all 9 pieces of the Lab map, then surrendering them to the Treasure Maps game in the Puzzles section of the Game Room. And if you don't know where THAT is, it's in that little yellow bar on your left when you navigate the site. Got it?

Where can you find pieces of the map? In other user's shops, they go for about 45-50K now (Talk about inflation, no?). Or, if you want to save money but you have a long patience span, you can keep clicking around Neopia till you get a random event. Don't use the search bar, these pieces are rarity 99, and don't show up there. Oh and here's a fun tidbit: Since these things are super rare, they're being asked for in Jhudora and Illusen's quests! Hang on, it seems I've veered away from the subject…I must get back to it.

Okay, now that you have your pieces, just surrender them to the place I told you two paragraphs ago, and then you'll have the secret location of the Lab Ray in two shakes of a Weewoo's tail! But don't go sharing this with other people who don't have the ray…it won't work for them unless they have given up their Secret Laboratory map pieces.

So you have stepped into the wonderful laboratory of that weird Scorchio who thinks he's a professional doc. What do you do next is select a pet you want to torture with the Lab Ray. Trust me, they are not going to like it. It's not going to be pleasant, but you may like the results afterwards…you MAY or may NOT…then the poor pet gets ZAPPED…

Here's a list of changes that can happen to your pet:

Species and Color - Either your mutant JubJub can change into a disco JubJub, or your blue Aisha into a faerie Ixi…or (horrors!) your Pirate Krawk into a Yellow Lenny…yeah, the possibilities are endless, and have the power to either make you jump for joy or bang your head against the wall (or make Lenny lovers gang up on me)…But of course, this is totally random, and there may well be a wide range of pet's colors out there, waiting to be seen on your pet. And yes, there are quite some styles only found in the Lab Ray…like there's Robot, Snot (whoa! Maybe THIS is where Meuka came from!), or even Sponge, Alien (for Aishas only), jelly and others that I have not seen yet…you can show off your pet in his or her new, exclusive, for-lab-ray-users-only color and yell, "I HAVE THE LAB RAY AND YOU DON'T!" OK, let's not get to that part and move on to the next change…

Gender - Your pet can turn from male to female, and back again. I don't know if you'll find this very pleasant, or if your pet will find it pleasant.

Strength - Either your pet increases OR decreases in strength. The latter is not pleasant at all, unless you are willing to have a weaker pet.

Defense - Same with strength, only changes with defense are quite rare, judging from some of the lab rats in Neopia. Many of them have really high stats when it comes to strength and agility (more on that later), but lower when it comes to defense.

Movement/Agility - Same with Strength, but this doesn't do anything in battles anyway…

Endurance/Hit points - Same with Strength, and this can happen quite often…your stats here can shoot up really high if you're lucky!

Level - Same with Strength, but the most devastating thing that can happen is for your pet's level to go down to level 1! This is perhaps even worse than weird species/color change…for example, you have a pet that's already reached the level 50-mark and you zap him or her, and the level goes straight back to level 1. There goes your hard work training (or zapping), right down the drain of the Disco Sink.

Yes, all of this can be yours for a minimal cost of approximately 450-500K (inflation stinks, right?)…But is the price tag worth it? Having access to the Lab Ray means that you are willing to take big risks in zapping your pet, or pets. Some Neopians share their experiences and opinions on the Lab Ray…and yes I have their permission to use their names here!

For me, the Lab Ray seems like a grand investment. Pounce (my ever-changing pet) is heightening his stats greatly everyday, and occasionally he'll receive those spiffy colors! I really don't know what I'd do without the Lab Ray. I'd have to be playing tons of games each day and I really don't have the time for that! ~Blubblub317

It's definitely been worth my money so far. Suikoden6775's stats are amazing- if it weren't for the lab ray, she'd still have the stats she originally started out with. It's a little disconcerting for her, constantly changing genders and species, but we've agreed to stop zapping her when she gets turned into something she really likes. We're both eagerly awaiting that, but until then, her stats are only getting better! ~Thegreenmooseofdoom

I think the map is sickeningly over priced, and I flat-out refuse to spend that much on it. ~Erileen

I am so glad I got my Lab Map when they cost 80,000NP. It was well worth my investment. My Lab pet, Mirumu, has had her stats shoot up and down through use, but the stat changes have mostly been good. I suggest you use the Lab Ray ONLY if you don't care about your pet changing species, or if you have a Morphing Potion handy for when they are done Labbing. Mirumu has been a lot of different species in the past (Bruce, Gelert, Elephante, Kyrii, Flotsam...) and tons of rare colors (Gold, Striped, Rainbow, Faerie, Silver...) but the most annoying changes are her gender and level loss. The Ray is completely random and whatever you get out of it is pure luck. If you are looking for the Ray to change your pet into something specific, you are in for a long wait. ~Meowth4

I think that the Lab map was worth the money I spent. I'm also glad I got it before the prices skyrocketed. I have Torkkin through the ray because I want him to become either a Darigan or pirate Eyrie, and there's no way I could afford a paintbrush so the lab's a cheaper alternative. Plus, he also gets his stats improved a great deal. ~Lunagirl52

I'm only willing to use the lab ray on one of my pets (Fire_DragonHawk, if you want to look him/her up). I've only started using it recently, but it has improved fire's stats. It also painted him fire and faerie (faerie as of today). However, it switched his/her gender about 5 times in the first two weeks. In the long run, I'm looking to get a Tyrannian Draik (though at this point, I'm not sure if you can get that through the lab ray). Since I'll never have the NP to afford a Draik potion and a Tyrannian paintbrush, this will raise his stats and (hopefully) get him the way I want for a less expensive cost (compared to the Draik potion prices).

I'll also be adopting abandoned pets and using the lab ray on them, to put them back up for adoption when they're pretty colors. It'll be like an adoption agency thing, only without having to buy expensive paintbrushes.

And as always, there are the colors that you can only get from the lab ray that should be taken into consideration, if you like them. (Robot, jelly, snot, sponge, etc.) ~Spotthechelsey

And there you have it! Now that some Lab Ray users have shared their experiences and opinions on that kooky invention, and that we have finally reached the end of my meaningless chatter about this not-so-little gadget, it's up to you to take into consideration whether you really want to spend a lot on the Lab Ray, or preferably not. The final answer lies within you.

COMMENTS: I'd like to thank blubblub317, thegreenmooseofdoom, erileen, lunagirl52, meowth4 and spotthechelsey for letting me use their comments and usernames here in my article. I salute you guys.