teh 1337est n00zpaper Circulation: 196,598,846 Issue: 929 | 26th day of Awakening, Y23
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Your questions answered!


Read the answers to the most commonly asked Neopets questions this week in the Editorial section. Each week the most popular questions will be answered by one of the creators of Neopets, so keep checking back to stay updated.


Quote of the Week


"Have you ever been to the Poogle Races?", asked Jhudora. It was like she hadn't heard Illusen at all. "Excuse me?" "The Poogle Races. You arrive and there are five measly Poogles waiting for you to bet on them. You get given betting odds, y'know 3:1, 4:1, or in some cases 9:1?", said Jhudora, as if she was in some Poogle-induced trance. "Those Poogles you see with the really poor odds, they seem so hopeless. They're always pathetic and sluggish-looking, but if they succeed in spite of all odds, the reward you can get from betting on them is huge. When the risk of failure is that much higher, the taste of success is so much sweeter. Sometimes you just have to choose the riskier option."


3 Non-Flash Games To Hold You Over



Now that Flash games are a thing of the past, you might be wondering how to spend your copious free time (or how to fix your sudden drop in income). Games are being converted as we speak, but a lot of your favourites are probably still missing for now. Fear not! This guide will walk you through the best non-Flash games to substitute into your daily routine. Game You Miss: Black Pawkeet Slots/Brucey B Slots Game To Try: Scorchy Slots Talk about a blast from the past! Scorchy Slots is one of the earliest Neopets games, and it shows: the artwork and Neopoint values feel...vintage. However, if you can look past the lack of flashy graphics and loud noises, you’ll find that Scorchy Slots feels like the laid-back cousin of Black Pawkeet and Brucey B Slots.

A Critique of My New Home’s Library



Greetings, my friends! You probably don’t recognise me from the last time we spoke; back then I was critiquing the food in the Neopian Pound and how I petitioned to have some form of Gourmet meal at least once a week. (yes, this request was summarily rejected, and no, Dr_Death did not accuse me of not being able to understand how budgets worked. Anyway). A few months ago, I was a Gelert languishing in peasantry. My fur, albeit a beautiful sapphire that shone like the sea itself, was in vast need of an upgrade, but of course, you’re not going to get that in the Pound. But as luck would have it, my sponsor saw great potential in me, and promptly supplied me with a Kougra Morphing Potion, and a Royal Paint Brush. Now, I have become the pet and royalty...

Gearing Up for Gadgadsbogen with Tropical Foods


Neopians everywhere are getting ready to celebrate Gadgadsbogen for the whole month of March, and what better way to celebrate than highlighting some of my favourite Tropical Food finds! I’m also going to bring to light some of the not so pretty fruits you may want to avoid, and suggest how you can even incorporate these foods into your everyday routine. Are you ready to take a dive into the freshest fruit shop around? Then let’s go!

Other Stories
"Almost Friendly" by iamcjblack
"You'll never catch me sucking up to her like that, Illusen." "Excuse me?", replied the Earth Faerie, turning around and looking for the source of that deep, condescending voice. Her eyes scanned the horizon until they fell upon a slight, purple-tinged figure she was all too familiar with. "Oh. Jhudora." "I said," began Jhudora, with a smug smile on her face, "you'll never catch me wasting my time sucking up to Fyora during those ridiculous Faerie council meetings. She's far too much of a fence-sitter to ever actually make any significant changes." It was not uncommon for Jhudora to make a snide remark to Illusen after a meeting and this was certainly not the first time that Illusen had heard Jhudora undermine their Faerie Queen's abilities as a leader. She would normally turn around and tell Jhudora how it cannot be easy having so much responsibility and how the rest of the Faerie council...

"Gourmet Mynci Day" by cazcazig
It was the 22nd day during the month of awakening. Leigume the red Mynci had just three important things to remember. The first being the fact that it was Mynci Day, of course, but he was also grateful to be employed and to have a future. He vowed to let nothing sway his delight, not even the daily trails of working at Virtuburger. This unique restaurant takes its design after the Flying Space Ship Burger. The spacecraft is privately owned by the baby genius, Mr. Gabbachomp. Virtuburger delivers a wide range of junk food to hungry space travellers. After boarding the ship, Leigume reported to Mr. Gabbachomp's office, located at the top bun compartment. The matured baby skeith informed Leigume of a high valued customer expected to show up within the hour. Gabbachomp gave a muffled speech as he scarfed down his favourite BBQ Onion Hot Dog.

"The Transfer" by _corvus
S"What ... is it?" It's a fair question — Dr. Death isn't one for silly or inane questions and Rose has known him long enough to know that. The Techo crosses his arms. "My dear, if you think I knew what Management was all about — do you think I'd still be here?" Between the constant construction of the new wing in the Pound and dealing with hopeful owners and distraught Neopets, neither Dr. Death or Rose had seen the delivery of the large, heavy metal container that now sat inside their joint office. The smell of sawdust and metal is strange, new. Everything felt strange and new with hardly any explanation — and now this. There was no note or detailed list of instruction on the container — nothing to say to whom it was meant for or where it had come from. No one had anything to say about it either, cornered down by Dr. Death or politely asked by Rose. It had just appeared...


Tropical Food Shop


This week's issue is brought to you by: Tropical Food Shop
 
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Great stories!


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A Minor Problem...
And this is why all verbal requests are banned at the Kreludan Mining Corp. collab with andypopo

by baiuki

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A Critique of My New Home’s Library
Since I know not everyone has an as excellent taste as I, I have decided to write this article to tell you exactly what to avoid.

by the_spirit_realm

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Faboo?
Faboo is in the eye of the beholder.

by love_check

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Sleepless in Neopia: Part 2
Quit it! Quiet the Questers! Collab with T0tor0

by elipsis4k

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A Faerie's Crossword
Do you know the names of the faeries?

by eleganza_lights



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