White Weewoos don't exist. *shifty eyes* Circulation: 197,798,779 Issue: 1005 | 5th day of Eating, Y26
Home | Archives Articles | Editorial | Short Stories | Comics | New Series | Continued Series
 

Your questions answered!


Read the answers to the most commonly asked Neopets questions this week in the Editorial section. Each week the most popular questions will be answered by one of the creators of Neopets, so keep checking back to stay updated.


Quote of the Week


The track still called to her, but she found fulfilment and pride in employing the knowledge she’d accrued through a lifetime of studying the old masters and the training techniques passed down through her family, adopting the honour and purpose of improving the lives and strengthening the bonds between Neopets and their Alabrisses.


Warning! Don't Visit the Snowager in Meri Acres Farm



Day after day we trek out to Meri Acres Farm to brave the Snowager. Here we hope to find treasures only grabbed by the brave or an elusive avatar that ranks us among the best. Yes, venturing into Meri Acres Farm and the den of the Snowager might seem like a great and brave adventure, but I am here to tell you the journey isn’t worth it. Meri Acres Farm and the Snowager are not worth your bravery and mirth. The destination alone should make even the bravest traveller reconsider their thoughts of entering the Snowager’s filthy den. Don’t believe me? I’ll prove to you that travelling to Meridell and finding the Snowager’s lair within Meri Acres Farm is beneficial to no one. 1. You’ll be pelted with rock and dirt We know that if we stumble into the Snowager’s den and awaken the beast we could be greeted with its fiery wrath. When you wake the Snowager, you’re blasted with dirt, rock, muck, and who knows what else, you are on a farm remember. Is it really justifiable to travel to the Snowager’s filthy, smelly den for a measly prize if you’re going to be blasted by the foulest mud known throughout Neopia? I think not. 2. The treasure isn’t worth it Sure, we head into the lair of mud and gunk to attempt to get the best treasure or avatar but usually that isn’t the case. We’re lucky to make it out with something even worth a mention. I mean you head into that farm and come out with what? An apple core, broken spoon, or squashed tomato. It doesn’t seem like those are treasures worth screaming from the rooftops for. 3. The journey alone is gross Just to get to the Snowager’s den within Meridell you have to trek across farmland that isn’t kept in the utmost...

Dr. Sloth's Mandate: Relocation to Terror Mountain



Greetings, fellow villains and aspiring conquerors! I, Dr. Sloth, ruler of the Virtupets Space Station and master of all things devious and diabolical, hereby decree the disbanding of my evil space station and the mandatory relocation of all inhabitants to Terror Mountain. This decision has been made in the interest of spreading terror and chaos to new lands, specifically Terror Mountain as it has been deemed not terrorizing enough. This decision has (obviously) been made with meticulous planning and strategic foresight and I am very pleased to announce that while crafting this decree, I engaged in successful negotiations with none other than Taelia, the Snow Faerie of Terror Mountain. Her powers and influence in the icy realm are formidable, and her support was crucial in ensuring the success of this mandate. Through subtle manipulation and coercion, I persuaded Taelia to lend her approval to the relocation plan, promising her a position of power and authority in the new order of things. With her reluctant acceptance, the final details of the decree were solidified. Please read the following ten directives carefully, as they are pursuant to this mandate: 1. Modification of the Ice Caves: The Ice Caves shall be modified with advanced communication devices and surveillance equipment, transforming it into a strategic outpost for my ever-expanding empire, where information is power and control is absolute. This new outpost shall henceforth serve as the central command for myself and my most trusted Grundo minions, who will establish their residence and oversee the operations of this Terror Mountain Takeover.

Unclassified Land Swap Survival Guide


A strange phenomenon has come over all of Neopia! If you tried visiting one of Neopia’s many Lands you may have already encountered it: A strange portal suddenly takes you to an alternate version of that Land where it has, as best as the experts can explain it, “swapped themes” with another Land! These swaps can be as negligible as Meridell swapping with Brightvale or as extreme as the Lost Desert swapping with Maraqua! If you’re not prepared you may end up a creak without a paddle, a blizzard without a coat, or a magma flow without a... well, you just shouldn’t be near a magma flow, which is the problem! After I and my Neopets experienced many of these Land Swaps, we’ve come up with a list of which Land swaps are “safe” or “dangerous” in the: UNCLASSIFIED LAND SWAP SURVIVAL GUIDE. One second you’re enjoying Mystery Island’s sunny breeze, The next you’re shivering in a Terror Mountain blizzard freeze! So what is a Land Swap? When the Land you’re in or going to gets swapped, the “theme” that Land has is replaced by another Land’s theme. Every Neopian and place within that Land is still there, but the environment has changed and the weather, landmarks, buildings, and other structures may have also been affected. SAFE LAND THEMES: Safe Land Themes are Lands whose theme doesn’t pose a risk of injury or put a Neopian in a life-threatening situation upon being swapped to.

Other Stories
"Through the Snowy Woods" by sleepiestkitty
It began with a Brain Quest and a Snowflake. Rather unusual for the Brain Tree to request a Snowflake of all things he could ask for; it is what it is, however. And what will be, will be. And what “will be” turned out to be… “…a very rare, never-before-seen snowflake straight out of the legends,” the Brain Tree was saying. His large, round upper form took on the shape of a brain — if brains were made up of dry autumnal leaves and long branches that snapped and rustled each time a breeze blew — while his lower body appeared to be an average thick tree trunk of dark wood after a storm. He gestured with his branches now as if to say, “Good luck with that.” Chloe the Yellow Kacheek felt her mouth pull up into a smile as she signed. Impossible. If not for the Brain Tree’s education in Non-Verbal Communications — including her own learning under the close tutelage of her parents and a specialized tutor when she was younger — they would not have been able to communicate at all. Chloe felt a great sense of warmth and gratitude towards the infamous figure of the Haunted Woods. Brain Tree rustled his bare branches in the air. A show of good-natured laughter. “Not impossible, Chloe.” How so? “Because there is truth in the legend.” He stopped to consider his words. “And in truth lies all the answers you’ll ever need.”

"A Strange Day in Magmaqua" by tatyanne
The sizzling sounds from the bonfire were a rather comforting noise to Rufus. He stretched out his hands and felt the heat radiating from the fire. A Magma Magtile floated by, carried by a gentle stream. Apart from the fire, it was pitch black this far down in the depths of the sea. There was a cold current passing by Magmaqua, and the cool temperatures were not sitting well with the Magma Scorchio. Rufus shivered. No matter how close he got to the flames, he could still feel an uncomfortable chill deep within his bones. With a disgruntled sigh, Rufus took a large step forward. He heaved a sigh of relief and relaxed. This spot was much better. Never mind that the spot in question was right within the flames. Rufus reached out and felt about for his little pile of marshmallows. A squeal of delight escaped his lips as his fingers brushed against a soft, pillowy marshmallow. Gently cupping his prized possession in his fiery palms, Rufus brought his hands close to his face. The confection was melting into a gooey treat. The Scorchio’s mouth watered. He would wait five seconds more, to be sure that the outside of the marshmallow was perfectly crispy with a slight char, but without being burnt. A lick, a bite, a chomp — Rufus devoured it with gleeful satisfaction. The flavours and textures exploded in his mouth. The marshmallows had...

"Haunted Jellyland Woods" by snowwhite6210
Twumbo the Pirate Xweetok smiled as he walked into the entrance Faerieland. Knowing that April Fool’s Day was coming up, he wanted to figure out the perfect prank and after learning the theme was Land Swap, he had an idea to turn Faerieland into Jelly World. He had to figure out how to plan it out though. With him was his beloved Snowbunny named Mumbo and Wumbo the Skritch. ‘How can I distract the Healing Springs Faerie so I can turn her water into jelly?’ Twumbo thought as he passed the Healing Springs noticing how busy she was. ‘Maybe I could put a bunch of Cancelled Stamp Foregrounds around the springs in hopes other Neopets would truly believe that she is not working anymore! Hey, that is a great idea! When she is sleeping, I will pour so many Mega Ice Creamy Jelly Smoothies to make the magic in her water not work! I know she sleeps at night, at least, that is what I have been told. It will also turn all the water in Faerieland to into Mega Ice Creamy Jelly Smoothie! It would be interesting seeing Neopians wake up the next day to see the water a different colour’ the Xweetok smirked as he thought of his idea while looking around Faerieland. ‘Next plan is to turn the ground into jelly. How can I pull that off? Hm…. With the grass, I could use a bunch of...


Remarkable Restoratives


This week's issue is brought to you by: Remarkable Restoratives
 
Search the Neopian Times




Great stories!


---------

Only Grey on April Fool's Day
It's just so dreary when you're grey unless you also get cake... haha jk unless???

by dehoot

---------

Haunted Jellyland Woods
Twumbo the Pirate Xweetok smiled as he walked into the entrance Faerieland. Knowing that April Fool’s Day was coming up, he wanted to figure out the perfect prank and after learning..."

by snowwhite6210

---------

The Floating Islanders - Reversal
Drew a dark reversed version of Neopia haha. Just a glimpse into my dark reality

by yankeesrule244444456

---------

Wheel of Monotony Shenanigans
"Nothing to see here folks, it's just another totally normal day..."

by pikcel

---------

Through the Snowy Woods
"It began with a Brain Quest and a Snowflake..."

by sleepiestkitty



Submit your stories, articles, and comics using the new submission form.