There are ants in my Lucky Green Boots Circulation: 197,075,226 Issue: 961 | 3rd day of Relaxing, Y24
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Fill Those Pet Slots: Underappreciated Additions


by _brainchild_

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---Starring Lerlifia the Chocolate Draik, Lervilia the Candy Draik, Walda the (very bratty) Baby Kacheek, and Christine, their owner!---

      Christine: Hi, everyone. In Issue 955 of the Neopian Times, I wrote about filling pet slots on a budget. However, I’m sure that there are many more pet slots to be filled across Neopia, so now I’m back to talk about filling pet slots with underappreciated additions. There are some species in Neopia that are less popular, and thus don’t get nearly as much love as, say, Draiks or Aishas, so I’m here to showcase some beautiful examples of underappreciated pets.

     Lervi: Heh... I’m glad I’m a Draik, then.

     Lerli: I know, right?! I sat in the pound for ages before being adopted and morphed into a Draik...

     Walda: Yeah, because you were pound stuck.

     Lerli: I know... Ugh. Why do pets even get stuck?!

     Walda: I don’t know.

     Lervi: Me, neither. I’ve never been abandoned because I’m just TOO CUTE! ---grins---

     Lerli: ...So I’m NOT cute, and that’s why someone pounded me?! Watch what you say!

     Christine: Anyway, which species are less popular? Well, Neopets has its own species popularity page at:

      //www.neopets.com/topneopets.phtml

      Christine: ...but the page doesn’t take morphed Neopets into account; it only lists created pets. Also, it lists Limited Edition pets as “less popular” because less have been created, but only so many can be created on a special pet day. (They are “limited,” after all.) Also, some species are newer than others, so less time has passed to allow them to be created. So---

     Lerli: I highly doubt the accuracy of that page, based on what you just said.

     Lervi: Agreed!

     Christine: Well, we’re in luck. Fortuitously, the fan site Jellyneo recently ran a poll about underappreciated species as part of their April Fool’s joke in Year 24. Users were told that one species of Neopet would have to be eliminated from the site to prevent glitches and database errors. Thus, users voted on which Neopet would leave. Each user selected their least favourite Neopet to be eliminated.

     Walda: Awww... That’s cruel...

     Christine: Fortunately, it was not for real, and none of our beloved Neopets are going anywhere. The 5 least appreciated species were:

      ---Vandagyre (18.6 percent)--- A whopping 18.6 percent of voters chose the Vandagyre as the species which had to go.

     ---Ogrin (9.8 percent)

     ---Buzz (7.3 percent)

     ---Kiko (6.6 percent)

     ---Chia (5 percent)

      Christine: The percentages for all the other species can be found at:

      https://www.jellyneo.net/eliminate/

      Lervi: ---snickers--- I’m glad I’m none of those species, then! Those poor Vandagyres can’t even wear half the clothing items out there...

     Lervi: I know, right?! Also, I couldn’t imagine being an overgrown, ugly insect like a Buzz!

     Christine: Lervi, please be respectful of all species. That’s the point we’re trying to make here.

     Lerli: Hey, at least Buzz Sushi is cute.

     Christine: Anyway, here are some cool colours for these five underappreciated species. Without further ado:

      ---Polkadot Vandagyre---

     

      Christine: This isn’t your average Polkadot pet. The Polkadot Vandagyre is mostly a light lime green colour.

     Lerli: Whatever. It can’t wear the cute clothes I’m wearing right now.

     Walda: It can still wear more than I can! *huffs*

     Lervi: I really like the Polkadot pattern. So energetic! You’re right, though, about the poor little owl-panda hybrid not having as many clothing options.

     Lerli: Why is a Vandagyre a cross between an owl and a panda, anyway? Did the Lab Ray Scientist mix something up somehow in some dreadful experiment?

     Lervi: I don’t know, and I don’t want to know....

      ---Maraquan Ogrin---

     

      Lerli: Yum! A delicious lobster for my dinner plate.

     Lervi: I know, right... Tasty.

     Walda: ---smirks--- Fine. If eating Neopets is okay, then I will eat you.

      --Walda quickly takes a giant bite of chocolate out of Lerli’s tail.---

      Lerli: OWWWWWW!!! Stop it, you brat!!!

     Walda: Make me! ---CHOMP---

      ---Lerli turns around and yanks Walda’s tail, catching her by surprise.---

      Walda: OWWWWWW!!! Hands off my tail!

     Lerli: Chompers off MY tail!

     Christine: STOP IT!!! All of you are SICK!!! Leave your deranged Neopet-eating thoughts in your heads, okay?!

     Walda: But chocolate is yummy...

     Christine: Then go buy a chocolate bar. Anyway, the Maraquan Ogrin has a beautiful colour combination of orange and aquamarine blue. Orange and blue are complements on the colour wheel! Also, I’m sure that these lovely lobsters are great swimmers. At any rate, they’re not food.

      ---Baby Buzz---

     

      Lerli: Ewww... Grubs are gross. They’re one of the few things I WON’T eat.

     Walda: Good, because I think that this little guy is rather cute! I have a friend at school who is a Baby Buzz.

     Lerli: Yuck... I feel sorry for him.

     Walda: Awww, come on. He’s not THAT ugly.

     Lervi: Yes, he is! She is absolutely right!

     Lerli: I’ll bet that he smells like the Meridell Rubbish Dump!

     Christine: I also think that the Baby Buzz is cute. Look at those big eyes and jolly grin. Anyway, just remember that everyone starts as a baby.

     Lervi: ---points to Walda--- And SOME never grow out of it!

     Walda: Being a baby pet isn’t really a bad thing. If you were a baby, you’d know...

      ---Chocolate Kiko---

     

      Walda: Yum... more chocolate for my eating pleasure!

     Christine: ---sigh--- Neither a Chocolate Kiko nor Lerli’s tail are appropriate sources of chocolate to eat. How would you like it if someone bit you?!

     Walda: Mean monsters bite me in the Battledome, but I show them who’s boss. It’s nothing that the Healing Springs can’t fix.

     Christine: Well, biting people just isn’t very nice.

     Lerli: The vanilla frosting and candy corn look tasty...

     Lervi: I know, right? People say that candy corn is a food you either love or hate, but I can’t imagine anyone hating it. It’s delicious!

     Christine: Well, stock up on bags of candy corn the day after Halloween, okay? That’s when you get the best price.

     Lervi: Good idea!

      ---Disco Chia---

     

      Lervi: Look at that neon pink afro! Would it look good on me?

     Lerli: No, you’d look ridiculous. You can’t wear it anyway, smart one.

     Lervi: ---frowns---

     Christine: Anyway, the Disco Chia sports a vivid, colourful floral pattern, which is perfect for spring!

     Lerli: Plus some tacky accessories. They look like stuff that Walda would play dress-up with...

     Walda: Hey! My outfits aren’t tacky!

     Lervi: Your sister Ella picks your clothes out for you. If you were allowed to dress yourself, you’d look like an absolute CLOWN.

     Lerli: Exactly... A facepaint-covered MESS.

     Walda: WAAAAHHHH! You guys are mean! WAAAHHHH!

      ---Thus, Walda starts to throw a tantrum.---

      Lerli: Someone shut that brat up!

     Lervi: I have an idea.

      ---Without warning, Lervi breaks a piece of chocolate off of Lerli’s tail and hands it to Walda.---

      Lervi: Now, shut up, you twerp.

     Lerli: OWWWWWW... You did NOT have permission to do that!

     Lervi: Well, the brat shut up so she could stuff her face with chocolate. Isn’t that what you wanted?

     Lerli: Yeah, but it hurts...

     Lervi: Shut up, you wimp, and enjoy a moment’s silence, okay?

      ---Conclusion---

      Christine: So, what was everyone’s favourite Neopet of the five we featured?

     Lerli: That tasty lobster! Yum!

     Lervi: I agree... Delicious!

     Walda: CHOCOLATE is so much better, so I vote for the Kiko!

     Christine: ---sigh--- WHAT have I raised?!

     Lerli: Three adorable Neopets who love food, that’s what. ---smirks---

     Lervi: Is loving food a crime?

     Christine: No, but eating a Neopet is.

     Lerli: Then give Walda life without parole.

     Walda: They don’t put babies in jaaaaiiiilllll! ---sticks tongue out---

     Lerli: True... Maybe being a baby pet isn’t as bad as I thought.

     Christine: Anyway, bye from myself and my three... interesting Neopets. Until next time, dear readers!

 
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