Reporting live from Neopia Circulation: 193,831,355 Issue: 717 | 29th day of Sleeping, Y18
Home | Archives Articles | Editorial | Short Stories | Comics | New Series | Continued Series
 

Unconventional Uses for Jhudoras Fingernails


by bha288

--------

If you've taken a look at any of the Jhudora-themed wearables lately, you will have noticed the hideousness of the Jhudora Fingernails. To be fair, there are some good Jhudora wearables out there, but as a general rule, these fingernails aren't the classiest of the bunch. In fact, fake fingernails in general tend to be quite impractical and unattractive. However, if you happen to have a set (or ten!) of them lying around and would like to make use of them for Jhudora Day, you're in luck! We have compiled a list of alternative uses for this wearable, which we will quickly share with you while Jhudora is otherwise occupied.

If you're hard pressed for a way to adhere posters or paintings to the walls of your neohome, look no further! Jhudora's Fingernails are sharp and pointy, and actually work remarkably well for tacking things to the walls. Although this creative solution might raise a few eyebrows, it will certainly add a touch of personality to your home. In time, your unique approach to decorating will be sure to earn you the coveted Neohome Spotlight trophy! We practically guarantee it.

If you’re anything like our favorite faerie, you’re desperately searching for ways to make your neohome as unwelcoming as possible. To that end, you can also use these fingernails as spikes to deter stray Pteris from roosting on your property. Now they're your neighbors' problem! This solution is perfect as long as you can ignore the color scheme. After all, purple and green generally clash with colors that aren’t…purple and green.

Assuming you enjoy the whole mismatched purple and green color scheme, you could even use Jhudoras Fingernails as a jumping-off point for your entire decor! For example, you could place a few into a vase, as a focal point for the room, or even use a bundle of them as a centerpiece for your dinner table! You might even consider using them as decorative pieces for your Goldy's fishbowl. However, you’ll have to weigh them down a bit so they don't float straight to the top.

As a bonus, if you’re having a particularly forgetful day and you lock yourself out of your neohome, you can simply pull out a fingernail (why would you ever leave the house without one?) and use it to pick the lock! Heck, with a handful of spare fingernails in your pockets, you’ll never have to carry around keys again!

Alternatively, you can use these fingernails to prank Illusen! The next time you visit her glade to complete a quest, bring some fingernails along. When she's not looking, you can scatter them about her territory, creating the illusion that Jhudora has been carelessly snooping around. But be sure to tread wisely; we at the Neopian Times are not responsible for any harm that may befall a Neopian who incurs the wrath of Illusen. In other words, don't get caught.

If you’re questing for the Brain Tree or the Esophogor, on the other hand, Jhudoras Fingernails will come in handy as trail markers. Never get lost in the Haunted Woods again! If you periodically arrange them into arrows on the ground, you'll be able to retrace your path when it’s time to leave. For the most part, this plan is foolproof. However, if you still can’t find your way out of the woods when night falls, you can take your remaining fingernails and lash them to the ends of a long stick to construct a primitive spear. Don’t be caught defenseless in such a spooky place!

In addition, if you ever feel the need to make that hair-raisingly obnoxious nails-on-a-chalkboard noise, you can! Through the thoroughly scientific means of sneaking up behind the Library Faerie and seeing what would happen, we have discovered that this effect can be achieved with these awful fingernails. On a completely unrelated note, we are now banned from the library.

Similarly, if you're attempting to wake up the Turmaculus, we would suggest poking him repeatedly with these nails. That would certainly be a novel experience for him, compared to the usual kicking and singing that he suffers through each day. As an added bonus, it would probably make him extra grumpy, if you want him to eat your petpet for some inexplicable reason. Wink wink.

On a more practical note, if you're just sitting down to a nice meal in Shenkuu and you discover that you have no eating utensils, a pair of Jhudoras Fingernails can serve as a pair of decent--albeit pointy--chopsticks. When you've concluded your meal, you can even utilize a nail as a toothpick to get that last stubborn morsel out from between your teeth! Just…not in public.

Furthermore, if you’re desperate to feed your Skeith or Grarrl, these fingernails can even be a source of food for your Neopet. After all, these particular species are known to be rather undiscerning when it comes to their diet. This wearable may not necessarily be nutritious but it will do in a pinch, especially if you don't have time to trek all the way to the Tyrannian Plateau to visit the giant omelette.

Or, if you don't know how to customize your pet for Halloween next year, why not consider dressing it as a vampire? You can use a pair of Jhudoras Fingernails as fangs! You'll probably want to consider painting them white prior to attaching them though. After all, what self-respecting vampire has purple and green teeth? Remember to use nontoxic materials, since you'll be placing them inside your pet's mouth!*

There are so many wonderful things you can do with this surprisingly versatile yet undervalued wearable. Why just yesterday --

Uh-oh, the clouds of purple and green smoke are rapidly approaching. Jhudora must be returning home after celebrating her wonderful holiday. Oh, gee, would you look at the time! We've got to be somewhere very far away and we should have left ten minutes ago! We hope that you have enjoyed these creative uses for Jhudoras Fingernails, and perhaps even thought up some of your own. And, uh, don't tell Jhudora we were here, okay? See you next time!

*Not recommended if your pet is a Skeith or Grarrl. They might get hungry and gobble up your handiwork!

 
Search the Neopian Times




Great stories!


---------

Current Weather
A hairy situation.

Also by blonde_and_lovin_it2

by certifiabletrash


---------

Duplicity: Part Eight
“You have already violated the common law once, Jeran, and however good your intentions may be, there will be dire consequences if you decide to do it again. We will not allow it.”

by likelife96

---------

Lord Faerigan - Fyora's Role in the Meridell Wars: Part Three
Queen Fyora watched the land below from the top of her tower. She saw the Meridell knights enter the citadel. She witnessed them fighting against the Darigans. As quickly as she could, she deployed a peacekeeping envoy of faeries to the citadel in hopes that they would be able to talk some sense into both sides.

by black_skull725

---------

The Runaway Princess Uni
My older brother Titance and I have done mercenary work in Brightvale for years. The kingdom owes us many favors, so when I have my armor on, everyone is nice and respectful. Sometimes, I even get asked to help some Neopets out. So one day I was in Brightvale, wearing my armor of course, when someone called from behind me. “You there! Uni!” came a voice

by blackghoulmon



Submit your stories, articles, and comics using the new submission form.