Still thwarting Sloth's mind control... Circulation: 186,904,163 Issue: 171 | 31st day of Celebrating, Y6
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100 Crazy Solutions for Boredom

by angelprincess223neo


IN YOUR BORING NEOHOME - It’s a drizzly, lazy, altogether BORING Sunday morning in Neopia. You make yourself some eggs and bacon and a cup of coffee and read the Neopian Times. *YAWN* There is NOTHING to do but boring chores and cleaning -- or is there? There are plenty of things in Neopia to keep you occupied, you just need the imagination to think of what. Need help? Well here is a guide for you of 100 things for you to do! J

*NOTE: PLEASE READ: This guide is only for people who are looking for a desperate change of pace, who are bored out of their minds, or people who are just plain crazy!!!

1. Go bungee jumping on the Peak of Terror Mountain.

2. Play Splat-a-Sloth with the REAL Sloth.

3. .yad elohw a rof sdrawkcab kaepS (Speak backwards for a whole day)

4. Make a dung sculpture of you and your pets in the middle of your lawn while trying to finish eating an Everlasting hamburger (my brilliant creation), and reading "The Magic Paw" with your eyes closed.

5. Play Cheeseroller with a juppie.

6. Eat the first thing you see at the Meridell Rubbish Dump.

7. Make a Tombola junk gallery in your shop.

8. Enter your gallery in the Gallery Spotlight.

9. Go annoy a bunch of shopkeepers by trying to haggle for 1 Neopoint, until they throw you out of their shop.

10. Submit a really long gibberish entry for the storytelling contest.

11. Play Gormball underwater.

12. Dress up as a battery and go around asking everyone for dung to finish your sculpture (see # 4).

13. Dress up like a Lupe and give every Chia you see a big hug.

14. Paint your pet snot and try to enter him/her in the Beauty Contest.

15. Stand on top of the Neolodge in a tomato costume and scream over and over "I LOVE ________ (insert name of person, place, or item)", until you draw a big crowd.

16. Run through the Lost Desert screaming "A GIANT ABOMINABLE SNOWBALL WITH HIS POTATO OF DOOM IS GOING TO ATTACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!" See who believes you.

17. Play Meepit Juice Break with Feepits.

18. Say "Merry Christmas!!!!" to every one you see-even if you don’t celebrate it.

19. Take a picture of everything you see that starts with the letter T.

20. Trade your extremely rare and expensive paint brush collection for a truckload of dung. (You still need more dung for your sculpture!! {see #4})

21. Spin the Wheel of Excitement until you won 100,000 NPs from it. (*NOTE: You are more likely to go bankrupt first.)

22. Dress up as Dr. Sloth and apologize to everyone you see.

23. Buy the Pant Devil a pair of pants.

24. Play Meriball with King Skarl and Lord Kass.

25. Eat a bowl of spaghetti while singing your country's National Anthem, reading the latest edition of the Neopian Times, and trying to jump rope with a branch from the brain tree and a cherry wish stick tied together with yarn.

26. Make a guild devoted to dung, and everyone who joins has to give you 5 piles of dung. (Yup, for the sculpture.)

27. Promise to buy Adam a truckload of asparagus if he gives you 1 billion Neopoints.

28. Walk around singing "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves" at the top of your lungs.

29. Stand in the middle of a crowded store and stare at the ceiling. See how many people look up to see what you're looking at.

30. Offer Dr._Death some fresh baked cookies. He really isn't that bad, he used to be nice!!

31. Play round table poker with the Turmaculus, Taelia, and the Faerie Queen.

32. Say nothing but hi all day.

33. Give the Esophagor the rest of your everlasting hamburger. (From # 4)

34. Beg The Neopets Team to make a dung paint brush (for Neopets, not just petpets), paint your snot pet (see # 14) dung, and try to enter the beauty contest again.

35. Walk around on your hands for a day.

36. Dress up as a giant marshmallow.

37. Spin around in a circle until you can't see anything clearly.

38. Discover and eat Jelly World.

39. Go to the hospital for eating too much jelly.

40. Buy 50,000 NPs worth of dung. (Just enough to finish your sculpture with 49,999 NPs worth left over!!)

41. When Adam has to go to the hospital for eating too much asparagus (see # 27) take the leftover asparagus and turn your Tombola junk gallery (see # 7) into an asparagus gallery.

42. Enter your new gallery in the Gallery Spotlight.

43. Make a giant whirlpool that sinks Tyrannia into the sea.

44. Throw garbage at the Ticket seller in Tyrannia. (How dare he sell tickets at 1250 Neopoints?!?)

45. Throw more garbage at the news reporter (for never updating the news!!!!)

46. Put make-up on one of your male pets while it’s sleeping. (Just make sure it can't hurt you.)

47. Start a new band called Dung lovers, devoted to, well, dung lovers!!

48. Give me a million Neopoints.

49. Say "Happy Birthday" to every one you see.

50. Growl like a Lupe while eating your leftover birthday cake from last year and scream GO POOGLE #5!!!, while playing the trumpet and doing the hula with the Pant Devil and the Swamp Ghoul.

51. Throw dung at random people.

52. Make snow angels in the Lost Desert.

53. Make sand devils on Terror Mountain.

54. Ask Stoneman3x's famous and ever-so-smart Meerca for advice.

55. Buy balloons for the Esophagor.

56. Force the Turmaculus to go on a diet.

57. Play Cheat! with a battle duck, a baggus, and a bottle of red sand.

58. Submit as many stupid questions to the editorial as you can think of.

59. Go swimming in the Rainbow pool.

60. Throw dung at anyone that says Meerca. *gets splattered with dung*

61. Go on Vacation in the Lost Desert and wear sweatpants, a sweatshirt with a turtleneck underneath, snow boots, a wool hat, a scarf, and mittens. Don’t forget your skis!!

62. Send Dr. Sloth a bouquet of flowers.

63. Give King Roo a piece of cheese.

64. Moooooooooooooo like a Kau all day.

65. Speak Gibberish all day.

66. Bet on the Turdle races in Faerieland.

67. Bet on the Poogle races in Meridell.

68. Play tag with a hairbrush.

69. Play Kacheek Seek with a Tuskaninny.

70. Play checkers with a pile of dung. (Make sure you let it win!!!)

71. Give Meuka a hug.

72. Give me a faerie paint brush.

73. See how loud you can burp.

74. Say Slothy's Slippery Sneezles Slippers 5 times FAST. Keep doing it until you get it right. (This may take a while.)

75. Jump up and down while eating a really big pizza and screaming MOMMY and clutching your neopet who is clutching their petpet who is clutching their petpetpet, and buy everyone ice cream. (Even though you haven’t finished your pizza yet.)

76. Say Barginfazigglenahead.

77. Say “ Yo, wassup dawg?” to everyone you see.

78. Using all the 49,999 NPs worth of dung (see # 40) turn your asparagus gallery (see # 41) into a dung gallery.

79. Enter your best gallery yet in the Gallery Spotlight.

80. Try to train an Uggatrip to not trip people.

81. Give up on training an Uggatrip and now try to train a wild Reptillior.

82. Go to the hospital because of a Reptillior bite.

83. Show up at a villains’ convention dressed as Judge Hog.

84. Buy the Lava Ghoul a glittery, pretty red dress.

85. Submit 1000 entries for the Caption contest.

86. Wake up Count von Roo at 10 am to play Deadly Dice.

87. Dress up as a neopet, go to Neoschool (if they ever will come out!!!!!!) and terrorize the teacher.

88. Give Fyora a tomato for Christmas.

89. Play Warf Rescue Team with Polarchucks and Onas instead of Warfs and Kadoaties.

90. Try to take over Neopia.

91. Take a picture of Dr. Sloth in his underwear and blackmail him to help you take over Neopia.

92. Make another trip to the hospital for being burned to a crisp by Dr. Sloth’s ray gun.

93. OMG lik totaly speek in chatspeek all day!!!!!!!!!!111

94. Make me a peanut butter & jelly sandwich so I can hit you on the head with the mallet from Whack-A-Staff-Member and force you to eat it because I hate peanut butter and jelly.

95. Try to buy a rare item from the hidden tower with only 100 NPs with you.

96. Donate 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 NPs to the wishing well, and then ask for a bottled faerie.

97. Play games for the rest of your life trying to earn back those NPs.

98. Stand in the Mystery Island Cooking Pot sucking your baby neopet’s bottle.

99. Hike up to the top of Terror Mountain while yodeling, chewing on a pencil, and giving Fyora your autograph with that pencil, while watching a Battledome fight on Thursday.

100. Read this guide over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over…

*NOTE: PLEASE READ: I am not responsible for any angry villains after you, ugly pets, mad pets, injuries, ruined reputations, or anything else as a result of this article.

Hey everyone, I hope you liked my first article! It took a long time to write this, so please drop a note into my box and tell me if you liked it!!! I plan on writing more if this gets published. Unfortunately, my dad doesn’t want me Neomailing so I can’t Neomail you back. L But please, tell me what you thought of it anyway. J

Stoneman3x, I hope you don’t mind me using RC in #54, I would’ve Neomailed you, but I can’t. Sorry. (I LOVE your comic!! It’s my favorite one!! Please don’t tell me you’ve stopped doing it because I haven’t seen it in a while!! [No offence to other comic writers.])

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