For an easier life Circulation: 109,226,905 Issue: 218 | 2nd day of Celebrating, Y7
Home | Archives Articles | Editorial | Short Stories | Comics | New Series | Continued Series

Interviewing Neggs

by coolaqua93


You may think that interviewing neggs is stupid, but don’t they have faces and mouths? Yes, they do, don’t they? I bet you’ve never thought about that before. Now before our lovely little neggs take over the world (Mwhahaha!), let’s learn about them.

I will interview the neggs from, you guessed it, Meerca Chase II!

The Happy Negg=THN

Me: So, why are you so happy all the time?

THN: *keeps smiling*

Me: Um, well, uh, you like to be happy then?

THN: *keeps smiling*

Me: Do you want to tell us about yourself?

THN: *keeps smiling*

Alright then, keep it moving, next negg!

The Blue Negg=TBN

Me: How does it feel to be 2nd worst?

TBN: Not too bad actually. When people see me they are like, “OMG LYK IT’S NOT YELLOW!”

Me: Ok, but don’t you feel pressured to be better than you are?

TBN: Well of course! Every negg is!

Me: How did you get to be in MC?

TBN: Well, everybody loves the color blue, so they picked me! ;-)

Now we have The Green Negg=TGN

TGN: Why am I here again?

Me: I’m interviewing you for The Neopian Times

TGN: YOU MEAN PEOPLE LOVE ME? *poses for a glamour shot*

Me: Not exactly, but you---

TGN: OMG! I now officially hate you dumb reporters! *leaves*

Me: I’m not dumb! I got an A in English. Hey, come back here!!! *chases negg*

After returning from chasing the negg, the article continues.

Ok, I’m back. I didn’t catch him. Well what do you expect? I’m not the Meerca!

TSN=The Silver Negg

Me: Hey Silver negg! What’s up?

TSN: Just taking a break from Meerca Chase II. It’s a much faster game.

Me: Really? What’s your opinion on it?

TSN: People seem to love that *new* negg! UGH!

Me: You mean the super negg?

TSN: He is such a brat. He thinks he’s the best negg. Of course I am.

Me: Well, before there is a slaughtering, I think I’ll leave. I don’t like devilled neggs much.

Next up: The Gold Negg=TGN

Me: Hey Golden Negg!

TGN: Why do people call me that? I’m the yellow negg with an off yellowish-goldish outline! Duh!

Me: Kinda long, eh?

TYNWAOY-GO: I don’t think so, actually, it suits me well.

Me: So, you’re the odd negg out?

TYNWAOY-GO: Not really, even though no one calls me by my proper name!! It bugs me so much!

Me: Well, um, uh, you’re particular about your name?

TYNWAOY-GO: Of course! Would you like it if I called you, “a negg-crazy reporter”?

Me: Actually, it doesn’t make much of a difference. Bye then. *walks away slowly*

Next is, The Rainbow Negg=TRN

TRN: Don’t you love me?

Me: I guess…

TRN: What sort of answer is that? Of course you love me!

Me: Whatever you say.

TRN: That’s better. Everybody loves me. I give ‘em all those good yummy neopoints!

Me: Are you ever jealous of the fish negg?

TRN: Me? Never! He smells like a fish. Who cares if he gives out more points?

Me: Well, some users would rather get the fish negg because you can’t smell through a computer.

TRN: *punches reporter*

Ooooh! Pretty lights! Next!

The Fish Negg=TFN

TFN: OMG EVERYBODY LOVES ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: Look at the ego!

TFN: I’M SO PRETTY IN BLUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: Yup, big ego.

TFN: What’s an ego?

Me: Nothing, really, nothing.


Me: bye now…

I didn’t want to risk another injury… Now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for…


TSDN: Whoa. So glad I could make it for the interview, Ms -?

Me: Super Cool Reporter Who Loves Neggs!

TSDN: Yes, that’s right.

Me: What do you think of the new Meerca?

TSDN: I never met the old one, such a shame… such a shame.

Me: But what about the one who chases you?

TSDN: Whatever…

Me: I’m asking you a question.

TSDN: You are? Carry on then!

Me: What do you think of the Meerca that chases you trying to eat you?

TSDN: Cheerio!

Me: Just answer my question!

TSDN: What was it again?

This is pointless. Anyways, one more negg to interview. No more neggs in Meerca Chase II? Well of course there is!

TNFBN=The not featured Brown Negg

TNFBN: *sob* How dare they?!?!

Me: What?

TNFBN: They put me in the Meerca Chase II top banner ad and I thought I was gonna be in the game!

Me: Um…

TNFBN: I know! How dare they do such a thing to me.

Me: Yup, cruel and heartless.


Me: You need to go talk to a psychiatrist.

No more neggs left! : ( I guess we’ll interview the negg faerie.

TNF=The Negg Faerie

TNF: It’s nice to be here. Let’s make this quick. I really need to get back to the Neggery.

Me: Ok then. Anything you’d like to tell me about neggs?

TNF: Neggs are normally very nice little eggs. They enjoy it a lot at the Neggery, or so they tell me. Whenever I tell a negg that they are getting a new owner, they cry!

Me: Oh, so sad! Why?

TNF: They don’t like to be eaten. Would you like to be eaten? No? I didn’t think so!! Umph!

Me: No need to get rude!

TNF: I’m very protective of my special little neggie weggies!

Me: They’re like your pets?

TNF: Pets? Never! They’re my dear little friends! I love the neggie weggies.

Me: Please stop saying neggie weggies…

TNF: It’s my pet name for them!

Me: See! They are your pets!

TNF: No!!! You don’t get it!

Me: What don’t I get?

TNF: Oh my gosh! I hear a little neggie weggie crying! Don’t worry Mama’s coming! One minute!

Me: Someone has problems…

TNF: Problems? No!

Me: No wonder you live there all alone…

TNF: That’s uh because uh, um, uh…

Me: Now say bye-bye and go back to the neggs…

TNF: Bye-bye!

Now that you know all about the neggs (neggie weggies!), you’ll be prepared for their rule of all of Neopia! Sloth and Neggs unite! What? I’m not looking smug! No. I’ll only be the right hand girl when they rule! MWHAHAHA!

*screen goes all black and fuzzy*

Search the Neopian Times

Great stories!


Blessing: Part Three
They had not travelled far from her mother's house, on the Meri Acres Farm, when Allara stopped abruptly and turned her gaze towards her travelling companion, the tiny, mysterious Mi Toria...

by numbertwelve


The Perfect Gift
The perfect gift for your friend really depends on their personality. For instance if they hate Dr. Sloth the worst gift would be an I love Dr. Sloth T-shirt.

by puppylover2333


The Working Girl
Plodding down the hall and yanking open the door, she stumbled through the sea of plushies covering the rug and arrived, alive, by the side of the bed. "What now?"

by lightninglover34


Stuck in the Lost Desert
Lost... tired... thirsty...

by spotthechelsey

Submit your stories, articles, and comics using the new submission form.