Neopian Mix-ups by reverbir |  |
One day, after lounging around in the tree for hours,
I stepped outside for some sun. Unfortunately, it was an overcast day and very
depressing. I headed to the Money Tree to beat myself up in attempts to grab
the random items on the branches. Thanks to a random event, a Zafara intercepted
my path with some advice: hunt down a Morphing Potion and sell it for a profit.
It was playtime! Arcy and I headed for the game rooms; Neosen was about a mile
ahead of us. Once there, we split up for our favorite games, Neosen at Meerca
Chase, Arcy playing Destruct-o-Match, and me ruling Ice Cream Factory. We raked
in the Neopoints and I was sent, by a majority vote, to buy refreshments and
a Tombola ticket. Of course, with my luck, the food shops were sold out and
I'd already obtained and eaten the omelette of the day. So I just stopped at
the Tombola booth and played the raffle. Taking the useless junk I won, I decided
to waste time spinning the Wheels of Excitement and Mediocrity. Fortunately,
I pulled a profit on both and reported back to the pets.
With our funds, we donated the Tombola junk
and some NP to the Money Tree. The process repeated rather monotonously for
the next two days, until the first random event of the quest. It was Boochi,
the bane of all Neopets, except babies and those without baby colors. Neosen
was safe, but Arcy got hit pretty hard. Chasing that juvenile menace proved
to be pointless, Boochi's pretty fast for a little guy. I'm not a big fan of
baby Acaras, and Arcy wasn't having a picnic either. I was forced to delve into
our savings for a green paintbrush to fix my Acara up. As a buffer, I grabbed
an extra three to face off with Boochi when he popped up again. Since we were
now low on cash, we hit the games again. We had a good haul and Neosen found
a new love, Cheat.
Another bout of donations and Shop Wizard visits
raised our luck plenty, but not enough. After trying in vain to drag my Meerca
from his Cheat match, I just wandered home, passing the Money Tree. Making another
stupid decision, I soon was making a fool of myself jumping for NP and apples
only to have Korbats, Eyries, and Uni beat me by a split second.
"This tree's rigged…" I muttered as I dejectedly
left with some new bruises.
"Yo, rever! Lookie what I've got!" cried a familiar
voice.
I turned and saw Neosen running my way with
a bottle. I can just see the random event describing the following disaster:
"Some thing has happened! Neosentret14 has tripped on a root and the blue
Gelert morphing potion has gone flying right at you!!" With a wild grab,
I caught the jar just before it smashed into my face. However, the momentum
somehow knocked the cork out and the potion gushed into my mouth and all over
my face. I must tell you, Gelert potions taste like raspberries. As I swallowed
it and wiped my face realization hit me. I was going to be a Gelert! Of all
Neopets, I had to be a Gelert! Not that Gelerts are bad, just that there are
better pets you can be.
Over the next few days, I grew a tail and antennae
and eventually became the blue, panting dog-like creature we call a Gelert.
Arcy wasn't so comfortable around me anymore, and Neosen always found excuses
to be out of the house. I wanted out of this stupid body!!! It was time for
another quest. I wasn't sure visiting Kauvara was such a good idea, but my pets
convinced me, at least to round up some NP for the magic Kau to use in an experimental
potion. We were all over that game room, playing games we hadn't touched in
months, almost getting trophies on a few, and find NP all over the place due
to random events, I felt sure I was going to be OK. Then Boochi returned for
round 2.
Neosentret14 had the paintbrush on hand, ready
to rush in and paint that pink menace back to adulthood and, hopefully, a peaceful
existence. That gun is pretty tough, even if the target can't become a baby.
Neosen was knocked out and Boochi switched targets. If it's tough being a Gelert,
It's a lot worse to be a BABY Gelert. Arcy chased the Bruce away and grabbed
the brush from Neosen's unconscious paws. Once back to normal height, I matched
my pets in color perfectly, we were a green trio. Anyhow, with no serious harm
done, we revived my Meerca and headed for Kauvara's shop. She seemed to understand
the whole situation and was pleased at the donation. We all headed for Roo Island
to harvest some berries. Despite warnings, I had to taste one. YEEEARRRGH! Nasty!
I don't know how that Kau makes her potions taste so good using these bitter
lumps of junk! We collected a good few pails full of the berries.
Back at the shop, Kauvara whipped up many different
recipes that smelled very suspicious. Once finished, she gave me samples of
each. Her guinea pigs don't get paid enough for these things! Potion number
one seemed like a dud, then my body bulked up and there I was, a Lupe with a
Gelert's head. Kauvara had some corrective potion ready, but I noticed her making
notes. Something about Fusion pets? Anyway, the next one was worse. This time
my hind feet turned into Bruce feet. I kinda lost my balance on that one. The
next abomination turned me into an Aisha, with my Gelert face still intact!
Now the next one was weird: my body stayed the same, but I got a Grarrl head
and Pteri feet! Now if that was weird, the last one was insane! Acara body,
only with longer limbs, a Meerca's tail, and a Lenny beak! After that I just
hauled tail out of there.
Losing hope of ever being human again, I hit
a random event right in the head, Dr. Sloth's head to be precise! I was in a
real pickle now! Sloth brought me to his lab, muzzled me, and stuck on some
electrodes. The muzzle filled with a horrid liquid that nearly drowned me, if
I hadn't let myself drink it. Some electric shocks clouded my vision for a while.
When I could see again, I glanced at a mirror, and saw a red ghost Lupe staring
back at me. He goofed! I lunged at his face, threatening to tear it off if he
didn't change me back. He was ready though, more liquid in the face and I was
a green Pteri. By pure luck, my rescue party arrived. Arcy, Neosen, and Kauvara
burst through the lab door ready to kill. My pets tackled sloth before he could
grab another potion as Kauvara gave me another experimental potion. A big flash
and I was back to normal, until I looked at my fingernails. They were blue.
"Oh well," said Kauvara, "you can't win 'em
all."
"Yeah, whatever Kauvara," I said, "Neosen, deal
with that Sloth."
The Meerca gladly obliged with a cool combo.
He grabbed two potion vials and poured them down Sloth's throat as Arcy held
him down. The resulting bang left my pets' fur rather black and Sloth as, well,
a cross between a Baby Bruce and a Mutant Lupe. We all had a good laugh as we
left the lump that used to be Sloth crying on the lab floor. Later that day,
Kauvara stopped at my house with a stack of papers, consent forms I needed to
sign so that the Kau could sell the potions she used on me. The only one I was
fine with was the potion that saved my skin, but only with this warning label:
"this potion only to be used by owners who have ingested transmogrification
potions. NOT FOR NEOPET'S USE!!!" For the rest of them, I just said, "Kauvara,
no one's crazy enough to buy a Gelert/Lupe fusion potion!"
The End
Author's Note: Special thanks to Championferret for the inspiration. By
the way, don't try to outwit Boochi or Sloth; they're a lot quicker in real
life than in this story.
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