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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 20th day of Swimming, Yr 26
The Neopian Times Week 50 > Articles > Everyone Works for Sloth!

Everyone Works for Sloth!

by pvk4444

GALLERY OF EVIL - Well, it was only a few days ago really, when Darth (my ecstatic male skunk Lupe) decided, completely out of the blue, that he wanted to be a Neopian Defender. Well, he really wasn't able to beat the Plant Devil after a couple tries. (that guy is really strong!) So we just decided, reluctantly, to peek ahead and see the second challenger to satisfy our curiosity. The both of us set out for the DON (Defenders of Neopia) headquarters to speak with Judge Hog about the matter. As soon as we arrived, the reporters bombarded us with the familiar report of the plant devil and poor Ginny. We quickly pushed them aside and knocked on the big oak door in the main hall. A small silver plaque on it read: JUDJE HOG.

"These people need to check their spelling…" Darth murmured as the door swung open. A loud vice from inside boomed, "COME IN!!" So we walked inside, into what appeared to be a very small office with a very small desk at the end. A rather large Moehog in spandex greeted us coldly.

"So," he sneered, "These are the two weaklings I've heard so much about!" he folded his hooves on his desk, peering into our eyes.

"Hey! I'm not weak, you, um…stretchy cow thing!" Darth snarled back. The Judge boomed with laughter.

"Well, you can't even beat the teensy weensy Plant Devil, now can you? You haven't even gotten to the Ghost Lupe yet!" This caught my attention. I moved closer to his desk carefully.

"Now, what did you say about a 'Ghost Lupe?" I asked suspiciously. Judge Hog narrowed his eyes.

"The Ghost Lupe is the second challenger. Didn't you know? Well, he's even stronger than the first…." He answered quietly. "Why?"

"Where can I find this Ghost Lupe?" I asked, with Darth muttering something about a cow in the background.

"Well, he's probably terrorising some young pets at the Battledome. That's where he was yesterday. Why, what're you going to do?" he asked, as we both ran out of the room, headed straight for the Battledome. We had taken an extreme interest in this Ghost Lupe How did he die? How strong was he? And why was HE the second challenger?

We reached the dome about twenty minutes later, to find a line of horrible monsters inside mauling several different young pets. We quickly searched for anything looking "ghostly." Darth pointed out that there was a fire ghoul. Did that count? But suddenly, a cold howl sounded from across the field. We ran over, only to see a young lupess fighting an opaque-looking Lupe with flowing blue stuff coming off his light blue fur. He also sported a mean pair of twinkling red eyes and sharp gnashers. After quickly pulling the lupess from the fray, we cornered the Lupe and decided to ask a few questions.

Darth: Hey you, why were you hurting that poor lupess?

Pvk4444 (pvk): Darth, lemme take care of this.

Darth: Rasim frasim... rrr....

Pvk: Now, we have a few questions Ghost Lupe First off, how exactly did you die?

Ghost Lupe (GL): Now, why should I tell YOU this?

Pvk: Cuz, um, Darth will sic ya if you don't!

GL: Humph. Word on the streets is that you can't even beat the Plant Devil!

Pvk: That's not the point!!!

GL: I'm not talking unless you do something for me!

Pvk: sigh and what might that be?

GL: Gimme that cheese ya got from Cheeseroller there!

He pointed to my backpack, where a mustard cheese roll was poking out of my backpack, licking his lips.

Pvk: Grrr…OK fine….

GL: Heh, thanx…

Pvk: HEY! Wait a minute you're a ghost! You can't eat!

GL: Whoops! My mistake...

Pvk: Rrrrrr….anyways. How did you die?

GL: Well…I was in these woods, then there was this, erm…fight, yeah and then….well I was dead….

Pvk: Do you think you could add just a BIT more detail?

GL: For another cheese roll!

Pvk: OK, forget that then... so what did you do to be on the DON most wanted list?

GL: Nothing much, I just invaded some scummy Chia's home for a while, nothing big…

Pvk: INVADED HIS HOME???

GL: Yup!

Pvk: HOW DARE--

Darth: No, wait! Let him go on! Didja eat him, huh, didja?

GL: NO, I'm dead you imbecile...

Darth: Ohhhhhhhhhhh... yeahhhhhhhhhhh....

Pvk: Geez this is getting nowhere fast. Is there anything you'd like to say to your fans before we go?

GL: Fans? I've got fans?

Pvk: No, not really.

GL: Oh, well that kicks the fun out of that…

Pvk: OK, just one more thing!

GL: What?

Pvk: Who do you work for?

GL: Why, Sloth of course! Puh, what Neo-villain DOESN'T work for him?

Pvk: Yah, good point…

And so, the interview was all in all, completely pointless. What's the moral of the story, you ask? Everyone works for Sloth! I bet even Sloth works for Sloth! I bet even the Neopets Team works for Sloth! I bet even--

Darth: Okay, okay... they get the point! Sheesh....

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