|
KRELUDOR- MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! My strange little titles have enough cheese
to cover ten Kreludors! Granted, Kreludor isn’t made of cheese, but we’ll just
overlook that for now.
Anyway, in the tradition of “Return to Meridell: The Second Adventure” I’ve
created a brief plot synopsis with foggy details and an acute lack of accuracy.
So, here goes nothing… literally.
We begin with our villain. Dr. Sloth. Black-robed, world-domination-obsessed
chicken-thing extraordinaire. Some of you veteran Neopians may remember the
incident almost three years ago when he tried to conquer the Lost Desert. Even
older Neopians might vaguely remember the incident years ago when Sloth
aimed a giant ray gun at Neopia and imprisoned his arch-rival. (I’m talking
about the Space Faerie, not RoxyFoxyRoxy.) Only with the help of kind-hearted,
Grundo-adopting Neopians could the Space Faerie break free and save the day.
Since the incident in the Lost Desert, (A humiliating defeat. He was beaten
by Brucey B, a Bruce with little fashion sense, a love of Cheat and about three
ounces worth of brains.) Sloth has been in hiding. Doing what, you may ask?
According to one poll, a vast majority of Neopians think he’s plotting revenge.
But come on, he has obviously been having a holiday! Look at him! Does anyone
else think he looks tanner? He definitely looks tanner.
Hs motives: World domination, as always. This guy needs to come up with something
more creative. Like getting the cookie to Roxy’s account and taking over her
advice column! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Or he could just open up a fast-food chain…
Next, we have our setting. Kreludor. A silly name, but a beautiful moon. Check
out that view. Shame the place has to be plagued by war. Wars are so ugly and
destructive… and during wars in space, they close all of the good restaurants.
I mean, I don’t want to have to eat this unless it were absolutely necessary.
Kreludor is home to the adorable, (though somewhat half-witted) Grundos. They’re
a happy-go-lucky race, with a strong love of fun. They’re also social, living
in family groups and being extremely loyal to these families (in most cases;
but we’ll get to that later.) Now, I’ll quit yapping like some science teacher
and get to the point. The Grundos are basically good guys. Carefree and innocent.
Then, Sloth runs in with his evil robot army and turns their innocent world
upside-down. He conquers them, mutates them, and turns them into his utter slaves,
without any hope of freedom…
Enter our hero. Gorix. Some of you may remember him as the sweet Grundo from
the Neopets Magazine comics. He lost his brother to Sloth’s cruelty. Now, his
brother’s mind belongs to the evil doctor. This isn’t just an average battle
for Gorix. This is personal.
He’s freed by an orange Ixi, a dashing heroine if any walked through the pages
of a Neopian story. She disguised herself as a Grundo (risking her neck if she
were caught) and snuck into Gorix’s prison-like bedchamber to rescue him. The
twosome, later down the road, are aided by Cylara, a young, eager Cybunny with
pigtails and a love of adventure. These three unlikely heroes are our sole hope
against Sloth. They have a headquarters, and a plan map that looks like my friend’s
geometry homework. A nonsensical mess of circles and arrows. (And either our
orange friend got a paint job, or that’s a different Ixi.)
Like Gorix, Sloth has allies too. One of which is Ylana Skyfire the Acara.
Now, I’m not usually one for praising the looks of villains, but even I have
to admit that she looks cool. There’s just something about the big, heavily-make-uped
eyes and the big orange helmet with antennae that makes her look like she could
kick some serious behind in the battlefields. She’s a mercenary, meaning she
has no emotional ties to the battle at hand. She’s only fighting because Sloth
pays her to do so. Also, there’s Green Seven, a space pilot who looks like a
reckless driver.
Also, another old friend rejoins us. Neopet v2. Some of you may remember the
incident about a year ago when he kidnapped four Neopet children and held the
hostage in an elevator. Little by little, they ran out of air while the population
of Neopia was scurrying around, trying to find the code to release them. Neopet
v2 is… scary, to say the least. Let me put it this way; he made the kids play
Kau Korral. Terrifying, ain’t it? However, judging by this card, methinks Neopet
v2 will go boom. Bye-bye! No more Kau Korral!
Sloth definitely has the advantage in this war. Not only does he have robot
clones coming out of his ears, (not literally. *shudders*) but he also has giant
killer robots, strong, mutated warriors, and better weapons and gadgets that
the resistance forces couldn’t ever hope to have.
But guess who’s back? The Space Faerie. And she has a personal vendetta against
Slothy. I mean, he he messed up her hair! How dare he! She seems to be a vain
faerie, with all sorts of shiny accessories with which to gain vengeance.
Another interesting character is Commander Gormos, not to be confused with
Gorix, though the two have similar names. He’s a traitor, but a hero. A commander,
but a spy. And he has those uber-creepy shifty eyes that seem to follow you
everywhere…
Meanwhile, on Kreludor, there seems to be some sort of conflict between the
orange Grundos and the purple ones. No specific cards relate the details of
the war. Judging by this book,”Attack of the Oranges!”, the purple Grundos are
using tools of brainwashing to get their children to hate oranges. I mean; what
did the poor orange ever do to you? Sure, they might be hard to peel sometimes,
but they’re filled with wholesome vitamins and minerals! And they taste good
with chocolate!
In all seriousness, this looks like an intense war. I’ll bet that the Oranges
are using similar tools of propaganda to turn their children against Purples.
Pah, what’re you teaching them? Where’s the love, people? Can’t we all just
get along? One interesting Orange is a peacemaker named Xarthab. According to
his description thingie, he tried to make peace before he was betrayed by his
brother, Zorlix. Interestingly enough, Xarthab is orange and Zorlix is purple.
A brother-vs.-brother type of deal. Very sappy.
Fortunately, the Oranges and Purples are finally able to settle their differences
and turn their attention to the REAL enemy, who we can only assume is Sloth.
After all, Sloth doesn’t care what color a Grundo is when he enslaves it. They
all end up being the same color anyway. Big, green and ugly.
There are so many more aspects to this plot that I was hoping to address,
but I think I lost about half of your attention already, so this is Ridergirl333,
signing out! But before I go, I want make one more point.
WARNING! Clicking on the following link will result in nail-biting
and some serious Jeran flashbacks.
Okay, don’t say I didn’t warn you…
This can’t be good. (The blue guy is Gorix, by the way.)
Does this spell trouble for the resistance? I hope not. Frankly, the demise
of poor Jeran was enough for me.
| 
