| Also by roxycaligirl101
UNDISCLOSED LOCATION, NEOPIA- Hello and welcome to An Interview Between
A Thief and A Wizard. I'm Kudio, the wizard. I'm here to interview a thief
but not just any thief, the best thief around, Clyde the Aisha Thief. This legend
has robbed from the Hidden Tower and stolen valuable relics from Fyora, herself.
He has nabbed goods from The Gallery of Evil's Pant Devil, too. Clyde has a
remarkable skill like no other. Many Neopians have doubted his existence because
he's good. He's too good. I even doubted his existence myself until I tracked
down the Spotted Aisha before me to do an interview. I believed I was running
a fool's errand but when you can imagine my surprise when I found the actual
legend for an interview.
Now, Defenders of Neopia, I'm sure you're skipping with joy thinking that
you will finally get some leads on Clyde. You're quite wrong. Being a talented
reporter and wizard, I've placed a magic spell on this article. Everything you
read will soon be forgotten. No one shall catch Clyde and I'll not be the one
responsible for his capture. Defenders of Neopia, good luck on trying to catch
this one! Nothing can block you from this spell, just a glance of it with your
eyes will make you forget. In the words of the infamous Clyde, "Did you really
think it would be that easy to catch me?" The spell will take effect soon, I
advise you to read fast before you forget it all. Don't worry, eventually, you
will.
An Electric Bruce wearing a long navy wizard's robe covered with different
colored stars, complete with matching pointed hat. Kudio sits in a dark room
upon a Gold Velvet Chair. The walls of the room are bare except for a wooden,
locked door in the corner. The Bruce holds a Quill Pen and an Electric Notebook
in his flippers. The wizard will scribble away through out the entire interview.
A small brown table sits next to the Bruce and separates him from another matching
chair. Upon that chair sits a spotted Aisha wearing a long brown trenchcoat
and matching, snazzy Fedora hat. He sits calmly with his paws crossed his stomach
awaiting the questions. He stares at the flickering candle on the table until
Kudio clears his throat to begin.
KUDIO: Thank you for this interview, Clyde. I really appreciate it.
Clyde changes his attention from the candle to his wizard interviewer.
Clyde smirks a little at the nervousness of Kudio. Clyde has dealt with worse
things than a wizard or an interview and keeps his cool. Clyde reassures Kudio
not be nervous with readjustment of his hat and a polite statement.
CLYDE: You are very welcome. I’m glad to be here.
With shaking flippers, Kudio continues.
KUDIO: Are you ready to begin?
CLYDE: Shoot.
The Bruce stares at his notebook and selects his first question from his
very long list.
KUDIO: First of all, how did you get into stealing?
CLYDE: Well, my mother was the Aisha Burglar and she formed the Aisha
Thieves. It’s in my blood.
KUDIO: So, you're saying you had no control over becoming a thief?
It was your destiny?
CLYDE: I think that is the perfect way to put it. My destiny. I believe
everyone has a destiny and mine is to be a thief.
Kudio's nerves have slowly began to disappear. He sits back more comfortably
in his golden chair getting into the interview with Clyde.
KUDIO: How did you become such a good thief? Was it your mother your
mentor?
CLYDE: I was taught by my mother. She helped me to learn everything
I needed to know. She'd be proud at how good I’ve become.
KUDIO: Since, I've never heard your mother's name, I'm guessing, you've
become more famous than her?
CLYDE: Well, she created the Aisha Thieves. They are sworn to secrecy.
That is why I left. I wanted Neopia to know I’m the best Aisha Thief.
KUDIO: If you mind me asking, what happened to your mother? I noticed,
you live with an human. I doubt a human could have formed the Aisha Thieves,
let alone be an Aisha Burglar.
CLYDE: Being adopted was not my idea. Let’s just say that now I have
a better cover. As for my mother? Well, she was caught by the Defenders of Neopian
and I’ve never saw her again. I really miss her a lot.
KUDIO: Eyes fill with remorse for his previous question.
I'm terribly sorry to hear that.
CLYDE: It's all right. Things like this happen in my line of work.
Maybe I'll see her again one day.
KUDIO: Do you believe stealing is wrong?
CLYDE: It’s only wrong if you don’t know how to do it! He snickers
at his answer.
KUDIO: Do you ever think about the people you are stealing from? The
pain they might suffer as you take what is not yours?
CLYDE: Mostly I steal from those who can replace what I take. It doesn’t
matter to them if they are missing something small. To the rich, it’s all small.
KUDIO: That's very interesting. You seem to have a bit of a Robin
Lupe complex going for you, to rob from the rich. Any ways, I'd never be able
to steal because I'd be so scared of getting caught. Do you ever worry that
you'll get caught one day?
CLYDE: All the time, but that’s a part of the game.
KUDIO: If you had to guess, who do you would catch you? Chia Police?
Defenders of Neopia? Pant Devil? Fyora? A wizard?
CLYDE: I’m not really sure. Maybe the Defenders.
KUDIO: Why would say the Defenders would catch you? Are they close
on your trail?
CLYDE: The Defenders have come the closest and may be the lucky ones.
If that does happen, I hope it’s not any time soon.
KUDIO: Not to worry Clyde. I think you'll be able to out smart them.
CLYDE: Thanks. I try.
The wizard shifts back in forth in his seat and leans forward interested in
Clyde's response to his next question. Kudio is just starting to get to the juicy
stuff.
KUDIO: You seem to have another side to you, Clyde. Tell us about
it. You really seem like a pretty nice Aisha and there is more to you than a
heartless robber.
CLYDE: Well, I do have my soft side. I decided never to steal from
the young or old. It just isn’t right. So, I wouldn’t say I’m heartless.
KUDIO: So is there come code for thieves to live by or is this your
personal code? Do you have any more rules you use to control your stealing habits?
CLYDE: The Aisha Thieves code is to steal, don’t get caught and never
let anyone know who you are. The last one was important. They only like the
victim to think all the Aisha Thieves did it. My code it just not to steal from
the old, young or pretty ladies.
KUDIO: So no one knows your actual identity? Not your owner or her
other Neopets?
CLYDE: I think one pet knows, but I didn't tell him. He's just too
smart. Other than that no one knows.
KUDIO: I hope he's one trustworthy Neopet. That he doesn't sell you
out to the Chia Police or someone. On another note, what's your favorite paintbrush?
CLYDE: I’m not sure really. I like Fire a lot and was almost painted
it once, but I gave it away.
KUDIO: He is very surprised. You gave it away? Why?
CLYDE: Because I knew a pet that really needed it. Of course they
don’t know I gave it to them.
KUDIO: You amaze me, Clyde. I would have never thought there'd be
so much more to a thief. You're proving your Robin Lupe complex more and more.
You rob from the rich and give to the poor.
CLYDE: Well, stealing is an art so I’m an artist.
KUDIO: Might I ask this on behalf of my sister, Roxy, but do you have
a stylist? She totally loves the Fedora and jacket look. She told me it brings
out the color of your eyes.
CLYDE: Hehe, no this look is all mine. I wanted something that would
hid my face that wasn’t just an all black outfit. I don’t really like black.
Tell Roxy thanks!
KUDIO: I'll make sure to tell her. She'll be thrilled. She also, wanted
to know who you do think offers better advice, Roxy or Sloth?
CLYDE: Roxy.
KUDIO: Are you just saying that because she's my sister?
CLYDE: Maybe. He winks.
KUDIO: Who is your favorite Faerie?
CLYDE: I think Fyora is a nice Queen. Too bad she hates me.
KUDIO: She hated you because you stole one little doll from her? Well,
I personally think you did a favor. She learned the holes in her security system
and improved it so no one else could break in. It could have been a whole lot
worse if another Neopet had broken in and stolen more than just a doll. What
if they stole a bunch of weapons for Dr. Sloth? They could easily take over
Neopia! That'd just be awful.
CLYDE: That’s very true. You should explain that to Fyora. Maybe then
she would understand.
KUDIO: I'll make sure to tell her if I ever interview her. She's very
busy you know, she doesn't have time for petty interviews, she's got big problems
to deal with. Enough about Fyora, how do you feel about the Neopian Moon?
CLYDE: It’s a very pretty thing in the sky.
KUDIO: I'd have to agree. My petpet, Merlin loves to take pictures
of the moon. Do you have a petpet?
CLYDE: I have a brown Snowbunny named Bonnie Parker. She's my lookout.
KUDIO: Did you steal her?
CLYDE: No I didn’t steal her. I was given her by the Advent Calendar.
KUDIO: Well, did you steal the Brown Pepet Paintbrush to paint her?
CLYDE: I guess you could say it was donated by a pet that didn’t know
they were donating it. Again he winks.
Kudio grins this is the perfect moment to dish out the dirt on Clyde.
KUDIO: I told you earlier about my petpet, Merlin. He loves to take
photographs and he has a very nice photo of you.
CLYDE: A photo of me? Clyde looks a bit nervous at the statement.
Kudio hands a photo to the Spotted Aisha next to him. The photograph is
at night and has an adorable Desert Aisha in a beautiful toga dancing with Clyde.
KUDIO: You can keep that photograph, Merlin has plenty more copies.
Don't worry he won't dare sell or show them to anyone else but me.
CLYDE: That’s good. I was thinking your petpet is a good blackmailer.
Thanks for the pic. Clyde puts the photo in his jacket pocket.
KUDIO: Who were you dancing with that one night in Faerieland? Does
she have a name? I'd dance with her any day!
The thief's face becomes flushed and even the tips of his ears turn red
with embarrassment.
CLYDE: Well... you see... she's The Goddess of the Neopian Moon.
Kudio leans in curious to the answer to the next question and why the outspoken
Clyde has suddenly, become so flustered.
KUDIO: I see, so how do you feel about the Goddess of the Neopian
Moon?
Clyde's face stays bright and mutters,
CLYDE: Umm... no comment.
The redness is drained from the thief's face as Kudio continues to shot
him with questions.
KUDIO: Do thieves get crushes?
Clyde is still red from the last question
CLYDE: Yes, I think so.
KUDIO: Do you want me to change the subject?
CLYDE: Yes, please.
KUDIO: I see I've tortured you enough with my questions about the L-word.
Now, I'm curious to know if you would ever kidnap a blue Doglefox?
Clyde's face has now returned to it's normal shade of yellow and black.
CLYDE: No I don’t kidnap, I steal.
KUDIO: I see, so there is no chance you'll cross over to any other
type of crimes?
CLYDE: No, only stealing. Harder crimes are for bad guys. I’m not
a bad guy. I’m just misunderstood.
KUDIO: Do you think this interview will shed any light on the real
Clyde? To be honest, I think it will clear up a lot of the misunderstandings
the world has about you.
CLYDE: I hope that it will. I hate that all around Neopia I'm seen
as a criminal. I hope this changes their minds.
There is a sudden loud knock on the door and a demanding voice yells interrupting
the entire interview.
VOICE: Open up! We're Defenders of Neopia!
Kudio and Clyde seemed a little surprised but decide to continue the interview
over the pounding at the door. Kudio rushes through the last of his questions.
KUDIO: We're running out time. So we'll just go the lightning round
of questions. This will be rapid fire of questions one right after the other.
CLYDE: Shoot.
KUDIO: Do you think you'll ever stop stealing? If so, when?
CLYDE: Nope, never.
KUDIO: On another note, do play any sports?
CLYDE: Running from the Defenders of Neopia. Is that a sport?
KUDIO: I don't believe so. I think it should be, it seems like a lot
of hard work and skill.
CLYDE: It is one of the hardest things to do. It can also be a lot
of fun! The Aisha Avenger is my favorite Defender to trick. Poor girl.
VOICE AT THE DOOR: That's it we're breaking the door down!
KUDIO: You ready to run?
CLYDE: I always am. He tips his hat and gets up from his chair.
KUDIO: Thanks for the interview, you know where to get out from, right?
The wizard winks.
CLYDE: Same way I came in.
Clyde slides out quickly through a hidden passageway in the wall and to
safety. Kudio waves his wand and sparks of blue light gather around him before
he disappears from sight. The colorful and spandex wearing Defenders of Neopia
break down the door and crash inside the dark room, only to find two Gold Velvet
Chairs, a table, and a burning candle. A wizard and a thief are no where to
be seen. They are both long gone.
The spell has taken effect and you've forgotten everything you've read
in this article. You shall remember this though, Clyde The Aisha Thief will
go on uncatchable and you should lock up your valuables!
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