1,800TH POETRY CONTEST

The Haunted Hummus That Almost Ate Me
by Treeword

Most 'pets do like a good scare
On the chilling night of Halloween,
Yet this odd event which happened
Was way more than I’d foreseen!

Listen close, I’ll tell you my tale,
For I decided upon a stroll I’d take
Through the Haunted Woods at dusk,
Which was rather quite a mistake!

My stomach growled, as if on cue --
A Bruce popped up, quite spooky;
He offered me a snack from his cart;
I thought him rather kooky!

I accepted, though... grabbed a plate,
And looked down upon a tasty treat.
Surprised I was to find some hummus,
Why, 'tis my favorite thing to eat!

Raising my paws, I prepared
To take a grand ol' bite,
Yet I was shocked to see two eyes
Staring back at me in the night!

Before I’d even had a chance,
It raised itself upon its place
And, with a terrifying leap in the air,
Came snarling at my face!

I ran screaming from these woods,
Understanding how it got the name. 
Now I eat hummus no more,
Which is really quite a shame!

An Advertisement From Camp Wannamakeagame!
by Rielcz

Come on in if you need a new thing,
Or having fun's you aim,
There's many tents and cabins for rent
At Camp Wannamakeagame!

Here's where it's at -- hold onto your hat!
Activities in sunshine and rain,
There's arts and crafts, carts and rafts
At Camp Wannamakeagame!

Have a canoe race 
Through the wide-open space,
It's quite the antithesis of lame,
There's nightly campfires, before we retire
At Camp Wannamakeagame!

Established Year Fifteen, we're new and clean,
Your summer won't be the same.
There's much to do (and indoor plumbing, too)
At Camp Wannamakeagame!

Not enticing enough? Don't get in a huff!
Please consider this claim:
Because we started (yay), 
Chadley replaced AAA...
Yay, Camp Wannamakeagame!

So, come on down 
If you need a break from town,
Be part of our rising fame!
Enjoy and relax, it's fun to the max
At Camp Wannamakeagame!

Techo Fanatic's Day Off
by Tyuio_k50

The cup is now over,
The stadium's bare,
But the Techo Fanatic...
He doesn't care.

He remains in his seat cheering
For a team that's now gone,
Screaming and shouting,
"The Cup must go on!"

But the kind King Altador
Saw him one day,
And said to his guards,
"Please take him away."

Now out of the stadium,
Now out of his seat,
For the rest of the day
He would sit down and weep.

Then morning dawned...
He opened his eyes,
And before him he saw
White clouds and blue skies.

The grass of the fields,
The smell of a rose,
Unfamiliar to him
Unlike bleachers in rows.

Fresh air in the wind,
Sunshine on his face,
In a free, open world
With unlimited space.

A nice day in the town,
His first slice of pie,
But it's interrupted when...
The Altador Team passes by.

"Practice!" they shouted
As they rushed to the field,
The Techo stood silent...
But he did not yield.

Faster than King Skarl
Eating chicken for dinner,
The Techo dashed toward the Colosseum
To cheer for the winner.

Back to his old habit,
Back to his old ways,
He would remain in his seat
For the next hundred days.

The cup is now over,
The stadium's bare,
But the Techo Fanatic...
He doesn't care.

Remembering A Neobuddy
by Ragecandybar

Bloodshot eyeballs, blinks bulge out;
A pirate’s heart and face that pouts. 
Shivering the timbers of those unprepared,
He is a Techo known for his stare. 

Bug Eye McGee can be quite the crank,
For his claim to fame was an April Fools prank. 
The lonely old Techo just wanted company, 
But no one appreciated 
Having him as a Neobuddy. 

That Techo swashbuckler 
Had a bad sense of timing;
He would show up even if you tried hiding. 
His eyes would glint with a crazy gleam,
And without a warning, 
“Avast ye!” he’d scream.

The crazy green pirate was assigned by a test,
But after a while, we all thought him a pest!
His random interruptions of “Ahoy!” grew stale,
Annoyed, we sighed -- an exasperated exhale.

At last, the time came for an awaited farewell;
This April’s hoax would be one to retell. 
Although it’s been years 
Since he set off to sea,
None will forget old Bug Eye McGee.

The Pilots Of Meridell
by Geneames1

Aviators far and wide
tell the tales of pilots true,
who ply the skies over Meridell 
and their various feats of derring-do.

Flying machines travel to and fro,
delivering cargo and messages, too --
An important and a difficult task,
entrusted to a privileged few.

"Pilots of Meridell" known 'cross the land
as only the bravest and best.
Fending off pirates and weathering storms,
Putting themselves to the test.

So, when you hear the rumble of engines,
Look overhead to the sky.
If you are lucky you may catch a glimpse
of a Meridell flyer going by.

The Many Uses Of A Fuzzy White Towel
by Sharnee_sparkle

A Fuzzy White Towel seems plain at first,
But it possesses many uses,
So don’t throw it away if you obtain one,
I don’t want to hear your excuses!

It could wipe away the tears of a Lupe
Who has been abandoned in The Pound,
It could make an impromptu 
Diaper for a baby Draik,
Though I doubt you’ll find many around!

It could be fashioned into a bag for a traveler
Who has not many goods to carry;
It could be used to wrap a birthday present,
Unless the gift is a large galley!

It could be used to dry stacks of dishes
After a hearty winter meal;
It could be shredded and used as stuffing
For a toy -- the young owner will squeal!

It could be sewn into a pair of socks
To prevent heels from getting blisters;
It could soak up a dripping Borovan spill,
That occurred because 
Of the fights of your sisters!

It could heal a wound from the Battledome
That your 'pet got from a tough contender;
It could be used to wipe away the drool
After, to Chai Tea Cake, you did surrender!

It could become the flag of Faerieland
To use in the annual Altador Cup,
It could whack pesky Draphlies at a picnic,
Rather than smashing your aunt’s teacup.

It could be used as a sun shade on holidays
When you are visiting Mystery Island;
It could be used as an effective parachute
When jumping off the highland!

Although I’ve come to the end of my list,
I’m sure that there are plenty more ways
To be creative with your towels...
If not, you could exchange it for mayonnaise!

My Neopet Loves Gross Food
by Binky1260

My Neopet loves Gross Food,
He eats it every day;
Fare rebuffed by choosier 'pets,
He scarfs without delay.

He lacks a discriminating palate,
His tastes are unrefined;
I can't describe the repulsive food
On which he's gladly dined!

I've offered a less-nauseating cuisine
Time and time again,
But he always turns his nose up
And rejects it in the end.

So many disgusting choices to make...
Brain Kebab or Shrimp Cupcake,
Snail Sub or Woo Woo Grub,
Pasta And Eyes or Bean Yogurt Surprise,
Stuffed Frog or Hot Worm Hot Dog,
Salmon Mousse Tea or Sherbet Gravy,
Maggoty Spud or Mashed Potatoes and Mud,
Ant Eaten Ham or Fresh Clam Jam...

But his favorite food of all is
Mayo-Doused Batter-Fried Grackle Bugs 
With Honey Walnuts,
No ifs, ands or buts!

I've warned him countless times,
As the Gross Food list seems endless,
That if he eats one more 
Chocolate Covered Onion,
He just might end up friendless!

Key Questing Catastrophes
by Limo8

I go to play that fun old game,
Yup! Key Quest is the name;
I roll the dice and see what it will show.
I lost my favorite house, oh no!

We start off fine, everything keen;
I roll my turn and everything is pristine.
I play my lint power-up, how sweet!
They stop on their turn... what a cheat!

I lose my patience and see what they do.
Next up, their turn, they stole my shoe.
Those fast little feet, boy do they run...
Cheaters and quitters know how to ruin fun!

I finally got a gummy dice, oh yay!
But gee, look who stole it 
And destroyed my day!
My opponent is cheating, that much is clear.
I won't take it much longer, you hear?

As soon as our game is through --
I know you cheated, guess how I knew?
I see that you left before I won:
You really do spoil all the fun!

As soon as I report for foul,
I get angry and sometimes I yowl;
"Don't you cheaters cheat! Geez!"
These are the Key Questing catastrophes!

All In A Slushie Slinger Waitress Day's Work
by Sheynacruz

Every morning starts the same:
Head to marketplace at six
Buy Zeenanas, Jumbleberries,
Add Chokatos to the mix.

Next, a mad dash to the shop
(Tuskaninnies run rather slow) --
Turn the key, push the door,
Time to get on with the show.

Sweep the kitchen, mop the floor,
Rinse ingredients in the sink.
Scrub the counters, juice the fruits,
Blend some ice into the drinks.

Sanitize the drink machines,
Pour the slushie mixtures in,
Wash those flippers for hygiene,
Zeenana peels go in the bin.

Grab clean apron, roll up sleeves,
Check that hairdo's still secure.
It's time for the Tuskaninny
To open up her slushie store.

First wave of thirsty customers
Now surges through the open door;
She serves them all with practiced ease
But, to her dread, there's always more.

From dawn to dusk there are no breaks
As AC fans come jostling in,
All yelling orders, hoping to be
Heard above the awful din.

The crowd grows overwhelming now,
Too much for poor Tuskaninny,
Impatient customers can't wait
And soon depart, though still thirsty.

By the end of one long day
Slush machines have all run dry,
Once more, shop's in disarray,
Tuskaninny lets out a sigh.

Recycle empty slushie cups,
Ensure that things are (mostly) clean,
She's free to go... till next day brings
A fresh start to same old routine.

The Ever-Misfortunate Wheel
by Pifflish

The Wheel of Misfortune 
Goes 'round and 'round,
And no one can stop it --
Well, no one we've found.

So, if you should tour 
The Deserted Fairground,
You might give a quick spin 
To this spinner renowned.

You can't see the Wheelmaster, 
Only his shade --
But that never hinders 
His game to be played.

For the wheel, it is frightful 
And sharp as a blade,
And each one who spins it 
Seeks sharper a trade.

With a creak and a hiss 
And an awful click-clack,
The wheel goes around 
Then it stops in its track.

You could lose all your coin, 
You could gain a full sack;
It could yield a new friend, 
Or Pant Devil attack.

You may find that you cough, 
Or may find a new doll
(One that only a Fairgrounder'd
Play with at all).

You could find only sludge 
Where you once kept your haul,
Or, worse still, find your wits 
Are exhausted and small.

Go on, spin the wheel!
Take your much-wanted chance!
Pull down strongly and watch 
The wheel's hypnotic dance.

Shut your eyes as it slows, 
And move not from your stance;
What's the worst that could happen? 
Go on, take a glance...