Jokes

These are some jokes for the guild beautiful disaster. Here are a few jokes you can read and hopefully you find some funny. If you have any jokes you would like on here send them to Brooke (timeless_couture).

The Jokes

Joke 1


After tucking their three-year-old child Sammy in for bed one night, his parents heard sobbing coming from his room.


Rushing back in, they found Sammy crying hysterically. He managed to tell them that he had swallowed a penny and he was sure he was going to die. No amount of talking helped.


His father, in an attempt to calm him down, palmed a penny from his pocket and pretended to pull it from Sammy's ear. The little boy was delighted.


In a flash, he snatched it from his father's hand, swallowed it, then cheerfully demanded, "Do it again, Dad!"



Joke 2


The woman was driving her eight-year-old daughter to her grandparents' home for an overnight stay.


It was late, there was very little traffic, and they were enjoying a peaceful ride. It was a far cry from the usual chaos surrounding them when the woman normally drove her to various activities during rush hour.


The daughter seemed deep in thought and suddenly said, "Mom, I have a question."


What do you want to know?"


When you're driving," she asked, "are YOU ever the idiot?"



Joke 3


One night a girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they were appalled by his appearance: leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos and pierced nose. Later, her parents pulled her aside and confessed their concern. "Dear," said her mom diplomatically, "he doesn't seem very nice." "Oh please, Mom," replied the girl, "if he wasn't nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?"



Joke 4


Why don't dogs make good dancers?


Because they have two left feet!



Joke 5


A man was recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling.


The man replies, "I'm alright, but I didn't like the FOUR-LETTER-WORD the doctor used in surgery."


The nurse asked, "What did he say"?


OOPS!!!"



Joke 6


What did the cross eyed school teacher say to his disruptive children?


I can't control my pupils."



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