Articles
2012 Survival Guide Part 1
CraigyB's survival guide for 2012.
We all know the world will end in 2012 but how will it end? In this article I will explain what essentials you will need and what will happen. Stick to it word for word and you can survive the end of the world.
Earthquakes and Volcanic Eruptions
Items you will need: Water-Gun, Staple-Gun, Long Planks of Wood and a flannel.
This is the simplest to survive. Use the water-gun to stall the ensuing lava flow/ The staple-gun can be used to stop the earth splitting in its tracks. Long planks of wood explain themselves, simply lay it across the splitting earth a jog a merry way across. The flannel may not be enough. Bring two. Simply wet them and wrap them around your feet and you can stroll across volcanic rock.
Alien Invasion
Items you will need: Tinfoil.
There is nothing you really can do when our Alien masters come back to destroy us. The best defence I can find is tinfoil. Just craft yourself a hat out of it and put that bad boy on and the Aliens can't read your thoughts and find you. Fill yourself a bag with supplies and head as far away from civilisation as you can. I suggest either Wales or Siberia.
The Rage Virus or Zombie Outbreak
Items you will need: A decent pair of trainers or sneakers, chainmail, gauntlets, motorcycle helmet, a mace and shotgun.
The Rage virus pretty much means a very fast, very angry zombie. You need to be able to run very fast so wear the shoes for it; trainers or sneakers. Get yourself some chainmail as zombies wont be able to bite through it they will break a tooth. Some gauge steel gauntlets to protect your hands from biting and so you can punch very effectively. It may seem random that it said motorcycle helmet. But this protects you from when the rage zombies vomit their blood at you to try and spread their disease. Weapons will be important. A mace is a good blunt object that can mash some brains and a shotgun means you don't need to aim for the head you will probably hit it anyway so shooting while running it possible. A good hiding place is essential, CraigyB recommends an attic of loft. Cellar is a bad idea as Zombies will be able to bash through the floor boards. Make sure it's the loft/attic where you can pull the ladder back up with you. Zombies cant really think so they either wont notice you or wont be able to figure out how to get you. Store plenty of food and water, if you run out of water put bowls on the roof to capture water. If you run out of food put on your clothing and armour and get out, bash some zombies and get some supplies.
Global Warming
Items you will need: Sun-cream, canoe, Bow and arrows.
So the jist of this one is, it's gotten hot so put on your sun-cream or you will get skin cancer. Sit in a canoe so when the floods come you can paddle to a mountains. The bow and arrows you will need for hunting animals or your fellow human for food. I know you may be thinking a gun is better but if you miss everything hears you and runs away. Head into the mountains find yourself a nice cave and bobs your uncle your saved. If you live in Scotland or Canada this advice isn't necessary practically live on a big hill.
Asteroid or Comet
Build yourself an underground green house with U.V. lights powered by wind energy. If this happens not much we can do.
Think you know what to do? Send me your articles about the end of the world.
Tourist
Right, its been a long time since I wrote. I remember what people love, are my rants. So I'm not going let you down. I hate tourist. So I went and got a job at Scotland's most famous tourist attraction, working for Stirling district "tourism". Yaldie. I do love my job, I get good banter with tourist to tell you the truth but I still hate them. For what they can be… ding bats. First of all let me introduce you to where I work.
The National Wallace Monument opened to the public in 1869. It is a Monument to honour Scotland National Hero, Sir William Wallace. Wallace won a battle against the mightiest army in Europe, that of King Edward the 1st of England in 1297 in the battle of Stirling Bridge. The monument stands on the Abbey Craig (Abbey Hill) where Wallace gathered his army looking towards Stirling Castle. This victory started the Scottish War of Independence that got Scotland its freedom. Braveheart is based on it but is very very very wrong. The main attraction is William Wallace's battle sword.
I think I can sum up some tourist with this example. I was once asked by a tourist "is this where the sword in the stone is?" I replied "no that would be Camelot" "which way is Camelot?" "England…" "Oh I guess we have to head that way then. Thank you so much bye!". Now, I knew she must have heard about the sword and thought wrong. I could not help but to not tell her that Camelot doesn't exist anymore either, well we don't know if it ever did its like Atlantis. So many people a day (mainly Americans, sorry but its true) walk in, cut you off mid greeting and say "No its okay I have seen the film where's the sword at?". Every time they say that I picture pushing them off the roof 220 feet up. The film was by Mel Gibson, that means you disregard it straight away. Also that woman who once asked me "where's the monument?" when she was talking to me inside should be hung upside down and slapped with a bagel until we get her brain working.
There are good parts to the job. I hope I meet the girl from California again who took a photo with me, got me to sign her book and talked to me about her nana. She was lovely. The primary school from Italy who took photos with me and they all brought stuff from home like gnomes, teddies and hats I had to be in the picture with. Today I got a letter from a school class of 7yr olds who drew pictures on thank you notes. There is one crazy thing. In July there were a group Chinese people visiting. A girl took a picture of me while I was writing some paper work (we get our pictures taken a lot there). I said to her "ask me next time I will pose" so I did and she took another. A month later my boss received an email from this girl that got passed on to me, she wanted to be my friend. We are friends now, she is called Angela and she is coming back to the UK to stay with me and Sarah for a few days and maybe we will go see her in China. Good Times!
So guys if you ever visit the monument here are some rules:
1. Do not try and climb the building from the outside. People die.
2. Do not ask if there is a lift. We get that 500 times a day and there obviously isn't it was built a 150 years ago.
3. don't write "FREEDOM!" in the guest book. Be original not an idiot.
4. don't walk downhill on the grass in the wind and rain. I have to call an ambulance and I get wet looking after you.
CraigyB
5 Ways To A Healthier Mind And Body
Chelsea Gower
Too often do I notice how much my healthy lifestyle gets sat on the back burner when daily life interferes with my motivation. I've been avidly working towards my goal weight and health for the past five months, and I've noticed that as soon as I get stressed out with school and work schedules, my motivation to keep up with working out, eating right, destressing, sleeping and incorporating me-time tends to diminish. After all, who has 2 hours to waste at the gym when finals, projects, presentations, and other educational obligations are drawing closer to their due dates? The harsh truth, however, is that we need to keep a healthy lifestyle to make sure our body has enough energy to get all these stressful assignments finished and to keep our mind from giving out. I've figured out five healthy habits that keep me energized and focused without spending too much time away from obligations that need to be completed. I'd like to share them with everyone!
Yoga
There's nothing better than putting down the pencil for an hour a day and stretching any frustrations out of my body. Yoga strengthens the core muscles in your back, stomach, and sides that promote better posture and better breathing. Yoga is also great for keeping in tune with your body. I love the feeling of my blood rush down my arms after a long stretch, or the tightening of my muscles when I'm in the half-moon position. The aspect of meditation can't be beat with yoga. For an hour, I'm completely dedicated to my body and my mind- all other thoughts go out the -blocked- If there's one thing I've learned from having a fast-paced lifestyle with constant meeting of people, it's that everyone needs time to themselves. Yoga provides a downtime that's of a reasonable length, and anyone- stretchy or stiff- can enjoy without pushing past their limitations!
Sunlight
Sunshine really does get a bad rap nowadays with skin cancer being widely recognized across the world. However, people really downplay the importance of adequate sunshine-time people need to be healthy and happy. Yes, UVA and UVB rays can be very bad for a person if they get too much exposure over a long period of time. But, UVA and UVB rays also stimulate our body to release the chemical processes that promote production of Vitamin D in our bodies. It's also been proven that sunlight helps fight off depressions caused by sunlight deficiency (this is why psychologists in areas like England and northern countries prescribe 15 minutes of tanning to depressed patients). Sunlight is meant to be our friend, we just have to know how to take advantage of it and maintain healthy.
Water
Oh yes, Water! Everyone knows the importance of water, but not everyone uses water to their advantage. Without water, there wouldn't be life as we know it. Water flushes our system from toxins, and actually promotes weight-loss by flushing fats out of our body! Staying well-hydrated keeps our blood properly coagulated, which decreases headaches and muscle aches. Keeping hydrated also keeps our skin supple and soft, promoting a brighter complexion and diminishes lines, wrinkles, and blemishes. Everyone should drink approximately 64 ounces, or 8 eight ounce glasses, of water a day to maintain a healthy body and mind. Your body will thank you for it!
Sleep
Another no-brainer to having a healthy mind and body is adequate amounts of sleep. This aspect of maintaining a healthy lifestyle usually kicks me in the rear. After all, who has time to sleep when there's an exam the next morning? Even though life can get in the way of essentials, it's pertinent to know when it's time to go to sleep. One's brain doesn't function to its full potential when sleep deprivation sets in; so missing a couple hours of sleep to put in some study time can be detrimental to both your body and your test scores. Sleep also helps our body repair itself from daily life like sunburns and illnesses. Scientists have observed that sleep deprivation can actually lead to hallucinations and death in severe cases of Insomnia and Sleep Apnea. Sleep is vital to our daily functioning, and therefore must be taken seriously. Put down that book and get at least 7-8 hours of good sleep. Your test grades will improve!
Laughter
The term "laughter is the best medicine" might be a cliché, but the statements stands true. Not only does laughing lighten stress and sadness, but it kicks your endorphins (happy chemical in your brain) into gear, sending bouts of happiness to your pleasure receptors. Laughing chemically makes you feel better! Laughing decreases stress, causing your body to relax and tension to decrease. These changes not only occur immediately, but studies have shown that tension can subside up to 45 minutes after a good laugh. This is why you feel so good after watching a comedic movie. Finally, laughter stimulates blood flow and decreases tension in blood vessels, making laughter a heart-healthy way to a better cardiovascular system. So when you're fretting about daily life scenarios getting out of hand, take a break and laugh at a joke!
I've realized that doing these simple tasks everyday has kept me feeling better and feeling healthier, especially as the semester draws to a close and my anxiety levels skyrocket. We owe it to our bodies to keep it healthy and happy, and with these simple steps everyday, I assure you your body will be happy and healthy, too. :)
Elf's time at the guild
No suggestions for an article were put forward so I'm just going to ramble a bit and see where it takes me. If you have been in the guild for a while your probably know I'm either happy happy oh look at that bird, it pooped on my from so high up when it landed on me it was practically a rock or I'm grumpy and complain about things. When I joined the guild I was the only guy but luckily the other members were relaxed and had a good sense of humour whereas in others I've been in they weren't ones for carrying jokes on they just lolled and that was it. Athy found me on the guild boards and I rarely go on there I had kinda gave up on the idea of being in a guild but it attracted me so in I came. I was keen to get into the activities and enjoyed a few light hearted rivalries. Insult fights with Mandy and Nea always trying to do something to annoy me, either getting that girl Brideoflegolas to neomail me or drawing an old dude and saying its me.
One of the main things about me is I'm always trying to enjoy life, and when times have been hard it was good having the guild to escape to, whether it was when I was poor and living of a bowl of rice a day or just been attacked by some racist. Even when my parrot was sick :P. Does anyone remember that guy dirktooth? I cant remember if that was his username but he was a funny one. I've seen a few members come and go but he stuck with me. Probably because it was actually another guy, he worked out a lot and was keen to let everybody know and he always tried to out do Jezzy (which is impossible she can stop a train with her ankle! Little know fact there) and he always seemed to talk down on me for my use of slang. Little to say he wasn't here for long and left because the guild wasn't high brow enough for him. I enjoyed calling him dude as he was quite open about his dislike for it. I believe the guild has a good balance of personalities, and I am happy Mandy is back. I remember long audio conversations with her from 10PM to 5AM sometimes (my time) and also audio conversations with Athy, although she never really spoke I got to hear her laugh. Even got to hear it rain once but believe it or not she didn't want to get embarrassed. That's right, that crazy lil dwarf person who must have too much sugar or artificial colourings in her diet (or just caffeine) can get embarrassed.
In my real life I have always enjoyed adventures and I'm happy that I get to share pictures from it with the guild. Last year when I went to the Hebrides, it was a good week, two mountains climbed many pubs drank dry and we got some New Yorkers who reckoned they could out drink us KO'd on the floor. When I got back it wasn't long after that I started my relation ship with Sarah that is nearly as old as my time at the guild which is long for me, my relationships normally last between a week and a month :P. Now if your newer to the guild maybe I should explain why they call me elf.
The elf thing started because I am half Irish, I venture into the highlands and woods, I have an Irish clan and though they don't know this I suppose the fact I'm pretty good with a bow and arrow would staple the idea down. I am naturally blonde but I do not have a pot of gold! I have no lucky charms and I have no clover for anyone to tickle. Before I knew it I kinda became a mascot and everytime a new member joined it was a race for me to get there to say I'm not an elf. Which always backfired I suppose I'm never going to escape that title.
I have some good relationships with guild member others I don't really get to talk to due to timezones which is sad. I have a fun relationship with Athy who I hope to meet one day. Jezz who I still believe is part of the justice league and could knock Super-Man out with a single headbutte. Nea who I don't get to talk to much now but we had some great banter. Nika who is one of the only people I know who also likes cricket, 20-20 world cup starts soon in the West Indies her local team is the West Indies, so she will be excited. I have only got to talk to Mo once properly so she probably hasn't a clue what I'm all about :P and Tae my Sub-Council tag team partner with her graphic mad skillz. I hope I win the lottery as the whole guild is invited to Scotland when I do ;).
That's all I seem to be able to ramble on about at the moment. Take Care guys.
CraigyB
Teacher Athy Back in Haven Force
It seems my fast-paced schedule decelerated earlier than expected.
Finals are just around the corner, but since I've pretty much completed all requirements other than two particular requirements: the dreaded examinations and a project asking to submit a revised version of my pedagogic creed printed on a 2 feet by 3 feet tarpauline. Other than that, I've got time to goof off.
I'm just happy to be alive!
Certainly you noticed it too, though my regular online time has been moved to 12 midnight onwards_ I found this nifty online card which offers unlimited access during off-peak hours, so that's what I'm using at the moment. I'd do anything to save the contents of my wallet, and yet be able to communicate with you guys. When there's willpower ad a strategic plan, I can get the best of both worlds! (That is to say, provided both worlds are worth it from my perspective.)
I've been scuttling around the guild quarters making adjustments to the webbie, sending crazy guild mailers, and introducing new pages to keep things fresh. I've had these plans since the beginning of the year. Don't be surprised with the updates and how in Neopia did I find the time to bring them into existence! Had it not been for the sudden work imposed upon me by my new job and university, I would have implemented them a long time ago. I hope you guys don't mind me making up for lost time!
It is an honor to be back in the Haven Force. I dearly missed hanging around the guild, hopping around while thinking up stuff, acting like a loony, and most of all, enjoying the company of everyone. It's one of the things that keep me happy on the site!
Athy
Where's my right click gone?
Update available, new software available, checkinging for this, or that. Leave me alone. Stop taking me away from what I'm doing to another window! Dont get me wrong, some of this new stuff is pretty cool, but when I got my Imac a while ago and the mouse didn't have a right click on it I was furious "Want to open it in a new tab just drop it in the bar up there"... NO! I liked my right click, it was simple and it worked. Next thing you know it will be "want a baby? It changed, dont insert here just drop the page you want there and it will open in a new lady."
Let me see I have just spent a while updating my Itunes to a 9.1 or whatever... doesn't seem to me like anything is different, I'm sure there are reasons for it but do those reasons matter to me? I dont see Beyonce on my screen thanking in a very soft and attractive voice. I would wait days for that but all that seems to has changed is I'm on here later to sync my Ipod.
Its not just internet updates this has spread to, I got Sarah a new phone for a present the other day, I like my phones simple, I cant keep up with the new things. This one I got her was MP3, Radio, had a camara, bish bash bosh £100 she was happy but then wait. It doesn't come with the new memory card she need for new updated music... £7 new 2GB card. Then wait, she needs the new cable to transfer these files. £2.5 off amazon, gotta wait a few days. Stop updating, its costing Craig money.
3D on TV now, its not its a drinki its just overlapping 2D images so dont lie to Craig guys, it looks cool but I only just got this new HDTV and you go and bring out some new type of TV that when my mate got it now puts me to shame and I'm a caveman. I was at Sarah's dads birthday party when this wee kid who should be playing with the balloons and froloking and what not is sitting next to me with his Nintendo DSIDONTGIVEAHOOT showing with his silly little plastic pen (its not a pen, theres no ink its a stick) all his cartoons of stick men killing eachother he made. And it takes photos, and he can get internet from Italy. I am 20, I have a DS but when I said mine didn't have a camera and I didn't know how to connect to wifi, he tried to show me and whern I said "mine doesn't look like that though" he looked at me like I was an idiot and I was an eight year old the little... rascal. When you go into the shops and ask about these things I'm sure they lie to you, even in food shops. I once had to ask where the -things for ladies at that time of the month- were (dont ask) and I was told they didn't sell them here, I only do them in the large shops. That was an obvious lie, I'm pretty sure the women of Stirling menstrate.
Wee rant Over.
CraigyB
Gigging
I'm not going to let you down, as you can expect from me this article will be grumpy. The grumpy wee elf that I am. This time I am going to be sharing my thoughts on gigging. I have been to many a gig, this will be me explaining what you can expect.
The fun always starts kicking in as you pass all the smokers outside puffing away in a hurry. You go through the doors where you are frisked by a fat man with sideburns or a gawky teenager with a spot for every time he has watched star trek. After you get through this trauma you pass the boxes full of confiscated drinks and what not and you walk up the stairs with the loud booming voice of a bored, most likely divorced man "Don't stand on the stairs keep moving!" while you think to yourself "Is that what your ex-wife said while you were moving out?". You push past and try and squeeze past what seems to be an ever fatter young generation who are all trying to get drink underage from the bar just so you can get a cup of water before they run out and its been thrown over everyone in the crowd by the group of guys who have a larger shoe size than IQ.
The bands come on and if you're lucky enough to hear them over the constant screaming of girls who seem to only go there to scream until they faint and shout "I love you! Be with me!" not realising that the current guy on stage is in to dudes not girls. If you manage to stay near the front and not get pulled away by the gravitational pull of the fat lass as she walks back to get more cake from somewhere you can enjoy "the surge" for when the main band comes on. This is a great moment in human socialisation, the frantic punching and elbowing and kicking to get people out of the way so they can be closer. I don't like this and have a few times resulted in me laying a few punches into the guy who has just elbowed Sarah in the face but then again, I'm very short tempered :P.
The band will be on, play some songs. Say that Stirling is the best place they play which is hard to believe when its only a small venue and we have the ugliest people in Scotland here. Seriously when I go to another city I want to take a camera to photograph all the pretty people so I can think "There's a chance when I have kids they wont look like a dried apple".
After what seems not very long they will finish their set, say good bye. Oh no your coming on for an encore? I didn't see that coming!!! I mean, not like every band does that. Why not just play another song you numpties.
I do like gigging you know.
CraigyB
DOES ATTENDING A UNIVERSITY MEAN THAT YOU USE YOUR INTELLINGENCE?
It is stated that the aim of the university I attend is to produce well rounded, articulate, and model citizens. Lots of emphasis has been placed on education for years and it is seen as the vehicle for social mobility and it allows you to move into a different social class. But does attending university make you more intelligent and well rounded? Let's find out.
Taking all the above information in consideration lets examine the behaviour of university student as it relates to the shuttle service.
The shuttle service is provided free of cost for all students who present their ID upon boarding the shuttle, but one shuttle can only hold 24 sitting and students are not allowed to stand. It comes every hour and half hour. Now on many occasions I am there waiting for the shuttle with only a few people around, eventually the few turns into a crowd, as soon as the shuttle is spotted on its way, the crowd gets better, people push in front of you and shove their way closer to the front, when the shuttle stops, everyone starts pushing and crowding around the door, now keep in mind that the doorway can only hold one person at a time. They push and shove, and push and shove some more, as soon as one person is about to step up that person is knocked to the side, and will have to try again to squeeze their way through, now this behaviour do not sound like well rounded and model behaviour, unless of course you are modelling the behaviour for an animal, but then again I think some animals behave a lot better. Now if theses people would use their head they would count how many people there waiting and determine if they could get in or not, plus most of the time there is room for everyone so why push.
On two occasions I timed the amount of time it took for people to get in the shuttle one at a time in an orderly and human fashion, (I only managed to time twice because it is a very rare occasion) on both occasions it took only two minutes for everyone to get on board and sit comfortably compared to five minutes of fighting and pushing which drains energy and leaves them hot, sweaty and miserable.
Another thing, if the shuttle only holds 24 and you get there and find 29 people you can't expect to push your way through and get in now can you, you have to wait your turn, the rest had to wait. Is it that university teaches people to be well rounded or does it teach them to be entitled, selfish and uncaring.
Let us move on to see if they are at least being articulate. As these students push and shove, you have to know that tempers would flare, as they get angry they shout, threaten and complain, but lets put aside the anger, some of them just speak poorly using the raw extreme of broken dialect, and to make it worse they use it in a brawling manner. Now the last time I checked that wasn't the definition of being articulate, unless I am wrong.
All of this stress could be avoided if they would just board the shuttle in a civil and orderly manner, taking other people into consideration. In my opinion some of these people do not use their common sense let alone their intelligence when it comes to simple matters like boarding a shuttle.
Nika
Signs of Aging.
For me, getting old isn't something I'm looking forward to. Sadly I have realised this week I am indeed getting older. This can all be explained through something I do, everyday that consumes a lot of time for me. The bus journey.
It starts off trying to get myself out of bed. A task which everyday gets more laborious. Maybe eating some breakfast and heading to the bus stop ten minutes early so I don't miss it. Hurrah Hurrah the bus itself is ten minutes late! I stand there and discuss the same thing every morning with the other old biddies at how disgraceful it is that the bus is late and its really cold. When the bus does show up you are greeted by a man with a face like he sucked a lemon who doesn't know how to add up change, he also pulls the bus out to drive before you've sat down so you have dignified stumble up the isle. I then sit there and try to put up with the noise coming from the girl with the black hairs headphones, silly girl she is going to make herself have a headache or some sort of discomfort!
The next step of the journey is arriving at Stirling bus station, where some days the other bus is so late I miss my next bus to Callander. Most days its just another wait as that bus is also running late. It involves a long stand in the cold where a Schoolgirl who is about 16 comes up to me and always asks me how my night was and how I am. It's a routine that has been going on for about 5 months now and is rather pleasant, the bad thing is she never shuts up and she gets on the same bus. The bus arrives, is very cold and then I have to endure 20mins of high school gossip and how much she had to drink the night before and "how shocking is what Cammy did to Alice like?" "I don't knows these people" "Well it is like" Jeezo do these kids not know how to talk properly anymore?!
Anyway after the 20mins we arrive to a dreadful looking place called Deanston. If good people go to heaven when they die bad people go to Deanston. The girl heads to the top floor of the bus and then the worst part of my day starts. School kids get on the bus, swearing, shouting, talking about crude topics…. One day I got hit in the head by a Satsuma! This makes my bus journey torture for another 20mins. I cannot believe how dumb kids are these days.
The bus arrives in Callander and I have to get off a stop earlier due to road works that were meant to be done in 7 weeks but are still there 4 months later. Now after reading that long complaint, how old do I sound? I am 20. And I haven't told you about the journey back yet.
CraigyB
Where have all the Grarrls Gone?
Long since have passed the days when Dinosaurs were cool and cowboys were a thing of the past. These days, our beloved Grarrl just doesn't seem to be important anymore. I neomailed and asked 30 random people, and the ones who didn't tell me to go away answered this question in a way I didn't want: "What's the best neopet?" None my friends, said Grarrls. Shocking I know so in this article I am going to find out, where have all the Grarrls gone? And why?!
First of all, lets get some facts sorted out. Right now there are 5,338,864 Grarrls and 11,740,686 Xweetox, and the Xweetox is very new compared to the Grarrl and is harder to pronounce! Let me see what happens when I click refresh… 11,740,691 Xweetox, that's an increase of 5. Now lets see the Grarrl's increase… oh wow they haven't. Lets think why.
I suppose the big flurry of dinosaur interest started in 1993 with the release of Jarassic Park. Then it was cool to like dinosaurs and every wee laddy wanted dino PJs. As of lately there seems to be more of Werewolf craze, people are changing from liking monsters that existed to the supernatural and sweaty monsters. I suppose if you slap a handsome pale face with a British accent, your going to make a sale. How can the Grarrl keep up with this? Theadore Rex tried the idea of talking dinosaurs but it didn't get the girls going. And there's nothing cute about a neopet that wants to eat everything compared with the connotations to werewolves from Lupes ect, which is why there is a sudden increase in the amounts of Lupes.
Also, let's look at the practicality of the Grarrl. I am a lover of Grarrls but I can admit; they are silly. Take a look at a Grarrl, small legs and small arms. If you push it over, he isn't getting up for a while and would be defenseless from prodding. (Just to let you know, as I wrote this I burnt my pizza) Also, when you think about it; they are tiny. Sorry to single you out Pred but as mighty a grarrl that you are. You are only 95cm tall. Nothing mighty about that, an eight your old could punch you in the face. "I would eat their face" Pred says.
Besides the comical flaws we should love grarrls, as the book says (the book would be too big for a grarrl to hold :P) "Grarrls are Great". I can't think of a better reason than the Grarrl squad. They protect the whole of Neopia everyday and stop it from blowing up and stuff like that. Jen of the Grarrl squad was recently interviewed by GNN (Grarrl News Nightly) and said "this whole planet would have been really dry, like when you rub yourself with a towel too much if it wasn't for us." So you know they are doing their job.
At the end of this short article I find myself in search of a metaphor so I have gone to Tyrannia. This is where the Grarrls came from and it makes me kind of sad. In the age of the werewolves and sci-fi Tyrannia itself has been left, not updated, not edited. The haunted woods and most other places have been and with the beginning of all these new lands I fear, for Tyrannia and the Grarrl. As it could be their ending.
Captain CraigyB
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Reviews
Movies
Zoolander
Zoolander is a movie created by and starring Ben Stiller. Also Starring in this movie is actor Owen Wilson. It is a comedy about the Male Model Industry and how it secretly controls the world. It is available on DVD and was originally released in 2001.
I have to say I was sceptical about this movie and was happily surprised. It is smart, fast and very funny. Will Ferrel was in the movie as well and normally you can get tired of his screaming and trying to be funny in his movies but in this film he is in the right dosage. This isn't an amazing movie but one to get under your belt. I recommend renting this DVD, purely for the line "Ever wondered if there is more to life… than being really, really ridiculously good looking?".
CraigyB
Gigs
Girl Talk
Girl Talk. I was very confused when I got the e-mail to the event. Is it a bunch of women talking? What does this guy, Gregg Michael Gillis, have to do with it? Luckily, that wasn't the case. In fact, Girl Talk is an alias Gregg Gillis took on while studying biomedical engineering. He states that Girl Talk is just a reference to pop culture and sounded like the complete opposite of a man playing a laptop, so the name stuck.
His business… music. He takes samples from many songs of different eras and genres to make the WILDEST mash-ups. Many claim that his samples were obtained illegally and that his music is a disgrace to some of the greatest musicians ever, like Elton John. So considering the controversy and his specialty being mash-ups, I just HAD to go.
The event was almost immediately sold out. I had to wait until the day before the show to pick up a couple of tickets from a local cd and vinyl store. The day of the event, you could just feel the excitement in the air. It was cold out, but I don't think anyone minded. The chatter immediately picked up when they started letting everyone in.
I made sure to push my way to the front early so I could get a great view of the whole show. The place was packed, and when the opening act began (I can't remember their name) the place was jumping. Everyone was dancing and having a great time, but their tunes just didn't suit the atmosphere. By the third song, people were booing and yelling out inappropriate words (one of their songs, they repeated "Don't stop!" and I got everyone around me to shout "Please stop!"). It was just horrible and everyone celebrated when they got off the stage.
Then the lights went off. A slow clap and chanting of "Girl Talk" began, and when he jumped onto the stage, the crowd went wild. He got onto his laptop and let the music flow. The speakers were thumping, you feel it in your chest. The lights were flashing, going nuts. Confetti was being thrown into the crowd, as well as toilet paper (I laughed when I saw it being brought onto stage, but it was a fun idea). Everyone had glow sticks and were dancing about, though every now in then you had to watch out for someone shoving you really hard trying to star a mosh pitt.
The only bad thing about the event was when it had to end. I was having way too much fun (I even danced so much I was too sore to move the next day). I just thought the event was very short. He only played music for about an hour and a half. Besides that, the event was amazing, I even bought a shirt! :D
So if you like mash-ups including Rihanna, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Len and Jimi Hendrix, this is a musician I HIGHLY recommend for you! He's not bias to any type of music (though he does tend to play more hip-hop) and puts on a great show, both visually and sound wise!
Reanna
Books
Halo: Contact Harvest
Contact Harvest is the fifth book in the Halo series but is based at the very start of the story, before the original three. Written by Joseph Staten it is written in a very different style to the other books.
The other books only grab the players of the games attention. This book is better for people who are new to the Halo Universe. It starts of with a very relatable story line to our real worlds events. It then builds up and brings in the problems of the later books.
Unlike the other books, that is mainly about the struggles of war and super-soldiers. This book has a more human element. The story of man losing faith in what he is doing and losing a cause and suddenly realising who he is meant to be, and bringing people together to save lives.
The book also tells the story of the other side better and it helps you understand the enemy more and their way of life. The story has grit, has dark moments, has love and actually makes you sympathetic to the characters. This in my opinion is the best written out of all the Halo books.
CraigyB (yes I am a Halo geek)
Gadgets
No reviews submitted.
Games
Bayonetta
Ever since I have heard about Bayonetta I was dying to play this game mainly for two reasons: I am a big fan of Devil May Cry 4 and hack-n-slash type games.First of all, I was a bit frustrated about Bayonetta because it got negative feedback. But eventually it earned my respect as I was going through the chapters and I got to admit, has its unique style.
The Good
Graphics. Are. Awesome. Very sharp texture and no visual stuttering (on the Xbox 360, but PS3 suffers a bit.) Everything is done down to the smallest detail, you can even make out the slightest detail of her costume, down to the small barely visible rose pattern on her clothes. Combat is fluid and satisfying, being full throttle from start to finish and keeps you alert and on your toes in hopes of activating Witch Time to create killer combos. A great plus, unlike it's Devil May Cry predecessor is that when you wish to purchase a technique, you can get a chance to try it out to get an early feel to it. It is very useful indeed as you often face dilemma to choose what item could be appropriate for you. Just click on the tactics you want to get, click on the try button, it'll take you to a ground where an enemy will fall off and you can apply the tactic to understand if that really is needed for you or not.
Remember those boss fights in Ninja Gaiden? Yeah, the ones where you had them down to a sliver of health, they get one good hit on you, and you had to do the WHOLE fight again? Not going to happen in Bayonetta. Almost every major boss battle plays out in stages and autosaves at that point, you starting off at those points with the bosses having a predetermined amount of health (though on the final boss, it's takes you to the halfway mark and she still has WELL over half her health, no matter what you did). No need to worry guys.
Environment is really cool; it reminds me of Ninja Gaiden II and DMC 4. As mentioned in graphics, everything is down to the most minute detail, and the designers did a great job taking an old-world gothic sort of architecture, and gave it a fantasy/new-world feel.
Bayonetta is unique in her characteristics. She has such an appealing attitude and actual fun to watch her make fun of the enemies/characters/situations thrown at her with such a haughty and almost arrogant attitude about it.
The Bad
While amusing, the cutscenes can get a bit lengthy. Though I refuse to skip them for all the precious little moments within them. And while dodging has always been an important factor for any hack-n-slash game, Bayonetta almost puts too much focus on it. In certain cases, you have to wait for the enemies to attack you, dodge carefully, get the witch time and start hitting them again. I prefer to take them on pretty much straightforward with decent amount of dodges, then again.. I'm the sort of player that just runs in screaming, weapon waving wildly.
The Bottom Line
Any gamer who is a fan of hack n slash type game will not find any serious faults in Bayonetta. It gets challenging but interesting in the later chapters – (Spoilter Alert: you get to pilot a missile!!!!) Bayonetta impressed me with fantastic storytelling, interesting characters, splendid environment, newer type of enemies with quick combats. Though a little disappointment like lengthy cinematics and excessive dependency on evading, Bayonetta is one hell of a game.
-♥Tae (man that was hard to keep Neo-safe |D )
Mafia wars on book
Basics of the game:
You find yourself in new york all alone and you face alot of trouble ahead if you dont start acting fast.
First of all you need to give yourself a name and build up a mafia through jobs,frighting,going head to head with bosses to running businesses.
Your main goal is to become top dog in your area plus as you start taking control becoming more powerful other areas are unlocked in different parts of the world
so you got your work cut out if you want to be top dog.
Things you have to do:
Do jobs to earn cash
You need to build reputation by growing your mafia by adding your friends but soon or later that will not be enough as you then you will need to add strangers otherwise you become easy prey to all the bigger mafia gangs out there!
STATS
every player has stats in a way its abit like our neopets as you have:
Health which is your life points
Energy: where you spend to do certain jobs plus you can gain energy packs when members of your mafia send one to you
Stamina: is how many times you can attack a gang member
Experience: is what you gain by doing jobs to help you level up
Travel:
this is where you can to different parts of the world so far you can only go to:
Bangkok,
Moscow,
Cuba.
they are a bit like new york where you have to fright and do jobs plus own business to earn the extra cash but there all set out a little different where you have to choose a gang to side etc
The vaults:
Is here you find hidden items in jobs you do. There are 7 to collect which makes things abit hard but on the plus side of things you can trade with your mafia family. Once you have all seven you can then unlock the vault to receive a bonus item
Above is only some of the stuff you can do and collect but i hope you now have a basic idea of what mafia wars is bout. Now this is what you been waiting my review on how good or bad mafia wars is so here goes:
Good Points:
The layout is easy to use
Good graphics simple so it does not take ages to load
You be surprised how addictive it can be as times goes on
There always updating with new items and areas
The company that made the game listens to the players comments as they have recently updated it so its more easy for us to find mafia members that we want to gift and send energy packs too.
Its another great game where strangers all help one another out to become one of the best players out there without having to make friends or even speak to them
Bad Points:
As its now run on beta it can sometimes play up a little
You have to wait for long periods as you have to wait till your energy goes back.
To be one of the best players to have to had strangers to your account otherwise your mafia will always be a target
you can only send out 30 requests which is very limited on how many people you can add and how many free gifts you can send.
Kelly
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Gossip
The Council
Athy:University drove me insane this last couple of months, lumbering through the wretched road of papers, projects, and examinations Good news though: I emerged in one piece and still bouncing! I've yet to take my final examinations and wade through one more major teaching demo! I began working on all my major projects since Day 1 - that's probably why I've got more time now. So yeah, I'm back from hiatus. I'd like to thank everyone for bearing with my absence. I'd like to applaud & hug those who kept the message boards going! You know who you are!
Jezzy: I've been busy with my paper as you all know. But my first draft for it has been approved. I am 3/5 done with it yay! I have been catching up with sleep. Then its back to work. Can't wait for this to be over in 2 weeks! Ah the life of a student. Other than being stressed with that, life has been good. I hope everyone has been great as well!
Nea: Nothing too exciting here, I am buried under a ton of school work, with the bachelor project coming up and everything (it starts on Monday). And, clever as I am, I keep accepting a lot of work that I don't even have time for. I guess a student must grab every opportunity for that small extra income that she can. And I am preparing for - what hopefully turns out to be - a big change next fall; I have applied for exchange to schools in Scotland, Denmark and Finland. And I am going to apply for a 2-years master in Denmark too, I want options! :3
The Sub-council
Tae: Well, School started fairly recently for me and I'm taking about fifteen credit hours this semester. It's actually easier for me somehow, no idea why, to take more than my usual nine. Messed up stuff. Now that the whole application process for Daialth is done (can't wait until she comes home!! :'D ) I'm gonna be a lot more active on Neo and the guild, and I'm gonna actually work on my petpages: Eisoa first! Um.. Today is my project day: I'm making a huge 1600 x 1400 picture for Vee featuring our characters Kyo and Amaya, dunno if I'll ever put it on neo since it's so ginormous XD But um...yeah. Same old, same old over here |D Maybe something interesting will happen soon, or I get a chance to go outside, I'm getting cabin fever over here! XDD
CraigyB: Lost the job, currently doing nothing... woohoo!
The cool crew a.k.a. the rest of you!
Merc: I've been kinda busy the past couple of weeks studying, and I only come on to collect dallies, check out the guild boards once in a while, that kind of thing =/ Nothing interesting there. But oh! I'm contemplating buying a tyrannian rashpid for my Storm Thought it'd be a good dragon-ish companion for him when I get time to write out their stories properly. ^^
Kittytoes: These days I haven't been doing much, Working on an application for a replacement draik of my Sheer_Freesia. I've been drawing non-neo related things a lot. Still have no job, no car, no phone, no internet ;; BUT I did get my new laptop and tablet a couple months ago! Cueii is probably going back to the lab and I'm trying to figure out what kind of sponge pet I want Dishrags to be, but morphing potions are so expensive D: There's not really anything else going on with me..
Kelly: Sorry not been around on here, thanks for allowing me to stay in Haven on my side account. I been really busy indeed, Still trying to move but been having huge problems
Miss you all and to the new guild members I am known as kelbie23
Katherine:Well, I've been really busy with work. I just recently moved into an apartment on my own mid December, so that's kept me busy also. I am actually getting ready to move to Brooklyn, so I am going back and forth between the two places looking for an apartment and a new job. Other than that... I haven't done much of anything. lol
Reanna: I've Been Very Busy Doing Homework, Taking Tests & Preparing Speeches! This Is my Final Semester At My Current College, Then I'll Graduate & Get My General Studies Degree, Which I'm Very Excited About! Then I'm Transferring To Our State College Where I'll Work On Getting My Ethology (Animal Behavior) Degree. I'm Also In The Process Of Training My Puppy To Become A Therapy Dog, Where He'll Visit The Nearby Hospitals & Hopefully Make Someone's Day! He Still Has About 4 Months Before His First Test, So I'm Excited To See How Everything Will Play Out.
Candis: I'm working two job at a Portrait Studio and at a Pet supply store.When I'm not working I'm normally hanging out with my boyfriend Rick and our two cats Purrcilla and Daisy.
Amy: --we got back together a week after the "break up", i don't have much internet access so if i'm not on a lot sorry. Ive been really busy with school and i had my birthday last month and was very busy, i turned 24. we went to the wild animal park and the zoo. we have year passes.
Petchy: I was on a bit of a hiatus during the month of January because my boyfriend came to visit from Wales. It was great! We went to Cuba, which was not so great because there was a cold front and I got food poisoning. But all in all, the trip itself was nice. He was quite the distraction, so I must admit that I missed a bit of school, and boy am I paying for it. I'm still trying to catch up! In a couple weeks or so I'll be interning at a web-design company for school for about 7 weeks or so. And that's what up in the land of Petchy!
Brittany: I got a new job working with a local Real Estate Agency in town, so I've been getting used to the daily life of that. It's mainly a secretarial job, but they have me doing things all the way from accounting to arts and crafts. Which I don't really mind. Plus, they're training me as a Real Estate agent, so that'll be a nice career option for me in the future. Other than that, I've just been trying to keep my house in order. I'm in the military, so I go to training one weekend a month, which is actually this weekend, but we don't do a whole lot in training. We just have a few classes on our job skills and such.
Anyway, I hope things are gonna be a little calmer around here now with the steady income and whatnot, so hopefully I'll be around Haven a lot more. I miss everybody!
Pat: I'm currently trying to find more freelance illustration work since the economy is a total shambles and no one wants to hire artists to do children's books at this time... barely scraping by even though I had a lot of high profile work right out of college. depressing!
I just got my website in order after a long time, if you want a peek: patriciaraubo dot com.
so overall, a little depressed and preoccupied (read: obsessed) with finding more work, but happy to have a nice roof over my head and friends to drink with on the weekends
Bunny: I'm working very hard on school as the end of the semester grows ever closer. When I'm not working towards A's in class, I've begun designing my friends' hair and makeup ideas for Animezement coming in May. ^_^ Flareon will be a tough Pokemon to replicate, but it will look awesome! And, if anyone hasn't played Final Fantasy 13 yet, it's a game you NEED to play! It's amazing and I can't stop raving about it. The art is fantastic and the plot line is thick, but easy to understand. It's a must-have for any gamer!
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