There's a story about me...something that most people don't know. It's how I became ice.




I just want to thank you for agreeing to meet with me. I wanted to make my story official, as well as correct all those lousy rumors about me, the orb, my past and present self. I'm sorry that we're in such a hole-in-the-wall, but it's the only place I know that's safe to meet in. I don't want anyone else writing this story down. I did some research, I know you're the best ghost writer in the business, so I hope you can do some justice to the outlandish events I'm about to tell you.

Before the freezing, I was known as The Pilot. Some of my other names you may have heard are The Crazy Pilot or The Insane Bori. I don't really remember my real name. The business I was in didn't allow for me to have too much personal information disclosed, so I came up with alias after alias. I know that my name is something like John, Jack, or Jake. Maybe the J makes a Y sound, like in Johann or Jonick. I know it had a J, though. Regardless of my real name, my life was dedicated to adventure. I was brought up in a home where I was expected to get a job like everyone else in my family, but something inside of me told me that I should be out there, exploring uncharted regions and seeking treasures that have only been fabled to exist. That kind of life called out to me, so after I received a Ph.D in the chemical sciences, I decided to become a pilot. I had been planning this for a while, so I saved some money from my student loans and used it to buy a small airplane. I thought I could become a commercial pilot, but as I said, adventure called out to me. Instead, I decided to travel all of Neopia, including Kreludor and the Virtupets Space Station on occasion, searching for things that people believed to be lost...or to only exist in ancient stories. At first, I started out as a search-and-rescue pilot, charging nothing for my flights to recover lost aircraft, sea craft, and people. I was always rewarded with a large amount of Neopoints, so I never needed to charge. You can't charge to save someone's life, you know? That's how I think, anyway. Heh, a real vigilante complex.

Oh, hang on, I have to go to the bathroom.

Okay, sorry about that. Anyway, as I was saying, I started out just rescuing lost Neopians, as well as their vehicles. They paid me large amounts of Neopoints to do this, and soon enough, I had enough money to retire. I figured that I would use my plane to accomplish my life goal: adventuring. I met a lot of people, made a lot of connections, and traveled all over the place. The usual job was to pick up a briefcase or two that would be left by someone else and return it to the guy who hired me. I never opened a single one of them. I knew that the businesses these men were in weren't always legal, and so I figured that the less I knew, the better. What interested me the most were artifacts, especially ones that people said only existed in mythology. To me, those were the biggest challenges, and therefore the most fun.

It was that love that led me to a man whose name I won't tell you because he promised me never to say...and I ended up forgetting it anyway. There was an old story about Ton-Tunak, the legendary sage from Terror Mountain that is said to have created the Scorchstones. I wish that was the only thing he created. The nameless man had heard of something else that Ton-Tunak created: the Orb of Ton-Tunak. You probably have heard it by the name "The Mystical Mountain Orb" because that's much more common. Whatever you want to call it, that's what the nameless man wanted me to get for him. I was completely up for it. He gave me an old, ripped map with large chunks missing. He had glued it to a larger piece of paper, and on that new paper he drew in what he believed to be the landmarks that were ripped out of the map. The guy was a good guesser, I'll give him that much. Everything he drew was completely right, and I had no trouble reaching the spot where the map promised the treasure that no Neopian had seen in ages. The map did not lie. There it was, wrapped only in cloth, hidden deep inside a cave. There were many carvings in this orb, but the thing I remember most was a cube that was in the middle that had carvings on it. I don't know how this thing was made, but it had to be magic. There's no way that ancient Neopians could have figured it out. I can't even think of a way!

There was something about the orb I never expected. They say that the orb is famed to be magical, that it grants wishes or some such. I never thought that it had any power. I figured that the guy was a dealer in artifacts and I knew this thing would fetch him a lot of Neopoints, and so my share would be large, too. Let me put it this way: an artifact that's so famed and in perfect condition like that Orb of Ton-Tunak would allow me, just being paid 1/5 of its worth, to retire in style and never, ever have to worry about money again. Money wasn't the reason that the nameless man wanted it. In the back of our minds, we want to believe in magic, and I think that the nameless man really believed that there was something powerful about the orb. He was right. Not only was I wrong to expect nothing from the orb, I was wrong to expect the magic to be good. It wasn't a magical orb...it was a cursed orb. I knew this when I lost my plane in the blinding snowstorm. I never lose my plane. I was born with an excellent sense of direction, I know where my plane should have been, and it wasn't there. Suddenly, things grew very bright, and I passed out.

I woke up to find Taelia, the most well-known of the Snow Faeries, tending to me. I was inside a house...well, it was more of an igloo. I was freezing, and saw her say something. I couldn't hear what she said exactly. She repeated herself, I could tell because her mouth moved the same way, and I could see her mouth the words "Did you hear me?" before she repeated what she said. I started to hear her voice, and what she said was more clear: "I don't know how this happened to you, and I don't know if you'll live. I can't do anything about it. You must have been cursed." I shook my head. Cursed? What was she talking about, I asked myself. She grabbed my hands and I looked down. They were ice. I was ice. I was completely frozen. I could still move, but my arms, my legs, my entire body, was cold. I was freezing. I felt like I was made out of ice. Taelia said that she had pulled me in from the cold. I guess she patrols the snowy wasteland that is the top of Terror Mountain. How she ever spotted my crystalline body among the shards of ice and powdery snow that no doubt reflected the sun directly in her eyes is beyond me. I was just greatful for her, and handed her the orb. I told her that it belonged here, on the mountain, and that if I was cursed, it was probably because the orb somehow knew that I was removing it from its home. Even if it didn't know, I wouldn't want to release this cursed artifact on the whole of Neopia. She said nothing when I handed it to her, but nodded and set the large orb in a basket. She rubbed my forehead until I fell asleep.

Later that week, Taelia told me that she found my plane. I got in and flew it back here. I still visit her every couple of months, giving her random gifts in exchange for saving me from the harsh climate.

So, now, about my life today. I don't know what I'm made out of. It's some kind of ice that never melts, and I'm always cold. Piles of blankets, layered clothing, it doesn't matter. It took a lot to get used to, the idea that bundling up wouldn't make me any warmer, and I eventually gave up and started wearing regular shirts and pants even on the coldest of nights.

Almost done, but hang on a second. I'd like to order a coffee. You want one? I'll get you one, you have to try it, even if you don't drink coffee. This place makes the best coffee in all of Neopia. I should know, I've had coffee everywhere in Neopia!

Okay, here you go, give it a try. Where was I? Oh, yes, the life today. I decided to finally use my degree in chemistry, hoping that I could find some kind of cure. I know it's a long shot, seeing as what happened to me is not only abnormal, but completely unnatural, but despite the slim-to-none chance I have of curing my problem, I have come up with a couple potions. I invented a potion that transforms Techos into mutants. It was an accident, I personally don't care for how they look. I also created the Honey Potion, which I gave to Taelia as a present. Being high in the mountains she has never tasted honey. It was a rejuvenating potion, something that was supposed to help make Taelia warmer during the harsher months. Somehow it got into the hands of Illusen, who gives it away to use as a battle item. I guess that's what happens with every scientist. People take their inventions and use it for evil.

Anyway, as far as I know, I'm ice, but I never melt. I'm always cold, even on the hottest of days, and I've pretty much gotten used to the fact that I'll probably be freezing for the rest of my life. My motor functions haven't really changed, but some parts of me have. I have an internal temperature of -83 degrees Fahrenheit, whereas everyone else is around 98.6 degrees. As a scientist, I am privy to machines and compounds that are lower than -83 degrees, and I do notice that I kind of harden a little when that happens. My joints become stiff and the colder it gets, the harder it is to move. It's easy to see why they call me Dr. Freeze.

I guess that's all there is to the story of how I became frozen. It was a curse, but now I am able to invent cures instead of steal treasures and artifacts, so my life work is more fulfilling. I do go out and fly on occasion, but because I'm so easy to identify, I can never go back to the life I had. Before, I was another nameless Bori and could easily come up with fake names so no one could find me. But now, now I'm known as Dr. Freeze, and don't tell me you won't remember my face and my name, especially if you saw me on an expedition carrying rare and priceless things. I use my plane to go out and rescue people like I did before, and people still give me large donations. I think they give more because of who I am, like it's some kind of privilege to have Dr. Freeze help them. I use their money to fund my research, and life is going well.

Thanks for meeting with me and listening to my story. I want people to know the truth about me and about the orb. You're done with your drink? I told you it was the best coffee in all of Neopia! Well, I need to get back to work, I'll meet with you later to edit what you write up.



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