It was late, the sky only lit with the palest of sunlight. The shadows ate everything, consuming and twisting objects to look much more sinister then they actually were. The castle grounds hung in eerie silence, a silence that seemed impenetrable. Even the water of Lake Valyn was silent, not so much as a wave was crashing against the walls of the castle that it surrounded. I sighed, enjoying the stillness of the night. I was sick, so sick of all the stupid meetings, the plans to secure the castle from the thieves that had preyed on the land of Vaynali since I had been born. They had increased their deadliness; they had swords and knives that they would use to scare a shopkeeper into handing over their money. It was disgusting. I wondered how come my parents had not sent anyone to track them down and throw them into the dark abyss that was the dungeons. I was sick of them just simply taking measures to protect me and my sister. I could protect Faiilyn; I was already exceeding expectations in my lessons of magic at four years old.

From my birth, I had been a quick learner. I could already speak quite well when I was two years old, a fact that had shocked my parents. They had allowed me to come to the diplomatic meetings, where I could listen quietly to the problems that my parents were facing as king and queen. The latest meeting had forbidden both me and Faiilyn from leaving the walls of the castle. I had fought that, every step of the way I battled with my parents at the meeting. Eventually, they had sent me outside, sending me off to my bedroom to simmer alone. I had fumed in silence. I skipped dinner for I did not want to give my parents the idea that I had forgiven them for locking me in the stupid castle all day long. I had waited for the darkness to overcome the castle, for the perfect opportunity to climb down the vines that covered my balcony like a blanket. For my chance to breathe in the night air, to feel the wind on my face. For my chance to feel as free as the sky itself.

I closed my silver eyes, letting the wind carry me away. I imagined myself floating among the stars, drifting far away from the confines of the castle. Floating among the heavens forever and ever until the day that I died.

Kvass?

Quickly, I snapped out of my fantasy. My muscles turned to stone, my flesh into ice. I felt like an animal trapped in a cage of iron. I remained frozen, hoping that my mother had not spotted me yet. The cool water of the lake soaked the edge of my skirts, a dark stain spreading slowly up my small form.

Kvass? What are you doing? Get into the castle this instant young lady! How dare you disobey your father and me!

Fury raged inside me like a fire. My flesh crawled with needles of hate, hate for my mother and father for doing this to me. For caging me in the castle like some helpless child. I wanted more than anything to cast a charm on my mother, perhaps to set her skirts on fire just to scare her. But I would be in even more trouble then, and tonight I was too tired to deal with the consequences. I looked up at my mother. She was standing on the balcony, her green eyes blazing, and her cream pelt prickling with annoyance. Her hands rested lightly on the railing, fingers tapping like drums on the smooth stone. There was no doubt that she was furious.

Yes Mother. I am coming. I breathed. I gathered my deep sapphire skirts, letting the water bathe my feet. I closed my eyes for another moment, drinking in the smell of the night air. I was going to miss it in the coming months.

Kvass!

I am coming!

I hurried over to the waterfall of vines, wrapping my hands tightly around them. I was not scared of falling, the vines had been here for hundreds of years, and they were thick and strong in my grip. I heard my mother's sharp breath of disapproval. My lips curved into a smile, and I quickly began my ascent up the castle wall. I reached my mother in no time. I could see that she was not pleased; her delicate face was curved into a mask of disapproval. But something else was lurking just beneath the surface. Was it fear? Was my mother really that afraid for my safety? I remained silent; I did not want to upset my mother further. I squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for a tirade of lectures to crash over me like a wave.

Kvass… my mother sighed. I waited patiently for the yelling, for my mother's fury to overcome her calm temperament. But instead, my mother wrapped her arms tightly around me, squeezing me close. I breathed in the smell of her perfume, the scent of water and lilac. It was comforting.

Do not scare me like that again. Now head off to bed love, its late. my mother whispered in my ear, her voice soft as cotton.

I nodded, standing as still as a statue as my mother broke the embrace, walking swiftly towards my bedroom door. I heard the knob click, and she was gone. I could escape now if I wanted, I could pack my bags and slip silently down the vines. But for some reason, I turned and headed into my bedroom, closing the glass door to the balcony as I went.

I would find a way to gain my freedom, but tonight was not the time.

~*~

The meeting was as she expected; it was long and dull and there was really no progress made on suspects for the murder of Kvass. She had adjourned the meeting early, making up excuses of things she had to do. She had hurried up to her bedchamber, fighting back tears that burned behind her eyes, telling the maids that yes, she was perfectly fine. But in reality, she knew that she was not. It felt like her world was crashing down around her all over again, all of the discussion of Kvass had brought make memories that she loved, but could not bear to remember. She closed the door, letting her limbs go limp as she slipped down the doorway, tears bleeding from her eyes. Her body shook with grief, every beat of her heart feeling like a knife being stabbed through her chest. A mangled sob escaped her lips, echoing throughout her bedroom, throughout Kvass' bedroom.

She cried in silence for several hours, for every time she stopped, she thought of a new memory that would make her break down again. Through her tears she could sometimes feel the warmth of Kvass beside her, the same warmth that her embraces would bring whenever she was crying. When at last she wiped her eyes, dried her tears in the silks of her dress, it was evening. Her room was shrouded in darkness, the shadows stretching along the walls like demons. She could not bear to think of demons, of the twisted creatures that had stolen her sister from her. She buried her face in her arms, trying hard not to cry again.

My queen? Are you ready for supper?

The soft voice of Kvass' old maid slipped under the door like a shadow. She lifted her face from the folds of her arms, trying hard to gather a voice that was strong. A voice of a leader.

Yes… I will be there shortly.

The voice that came was a pitiful attempt. She sounded like a wounded animal. Her people could not afford for her to be so weak, for they were just as shaken by Kvass' death as she was. She would have to be strong for her people. Kvass would have wanted that. Slowly, she stood from her crumpled position on the floor, smoothing the wrinkles in her dress, wiping the last of her tears from her eyes. She filled her lungs with air, struggling to ignore the ache that ran through her when she did.

She wrapped her hands around the thin chain of the amulet, closing her eyes and hoping that she would be able to hold herself together for just a little while.

~*~

Faiilyn, City of Vanesta, June 19th, 1996