♦ Name : Qe-Lin Sasaki
♦ Nicknames : Que-San, Kiyoko (means "pure child")
♦ Age : Around 20
♦ Gender : Female
♦ Species : Cybunnyt
♦ Fur color : Dark grey
♦ Eye color : Deep burgundy ♦ Personality : Withdrawn, tense, humble, appreciative, generous
♦ Biggest fear : Her secret being exposed
♦ Biggest joy : Her new job at Mitsubaya Inc.
♦ Talents : Sculpting, absorbing practical and theoretical knowledge quickly

Two years ago I was on top of the world. Breaking free from my family's tactics to make me an obedient person without any free will or desire, was the first step. I quit my job one day and received nothing but startled looks from my colleagues when I told them the news. At the time I didn't really care, because I thought that they were just surprised by what seemed like a fundamental personality change in me. When I had finished my somewhat fiery speech I stomped off to my father's office to inform him that I wasn't coming back, ever. And that I wouldn't let myself be trampled on like he had done for nearly all of my life. My father's face was white as a sheet as he tried to mumble something, but I had already left by the time he could say something intelligible.

I went to my family home and packed my things as fast as possible, avoiding my older sister's questions. I didn't know what got into me, but one thing I knew for sure: I had to get out of here. A burning feeling in my chest drove me to do all this and I simply complied. And it felt good. Yes, it did. For the first time in my life I had made a choice, a choice of my own, and I wallowed in the luxury of being able to think for myself.

I settled in a nearby city, which was much bigger than the one I used to live in, and spent almost all of my savings on a little flat in a murky building. My bed reeked of something I didn't want to think about and my kitchen was cluttered with dirty cutlery, pots and plates from the previous tenant. It was certainly very different from the comfortable home I'd lived in since I was born. My family wasn't rich but we made a decent enough living to afford some luxuries that most people couldn't. Sitting down on an old, worn and stained sofa I pondered what had happened during the last few hours. How had this been possible? In the blink of eye I made the decision to be myself, to think for myself, and to leave. Why had I never felt that desire before? Why now? All of these questions swirled through my mind as I closed my eyes, lying back against the soft fabric and fell asleep.

When I woke up it was dark in the room. I went to the window and realized it must have been late in the evening already. Thousands of pretty lights twinkled from the countless sky-scrapers in the area. I wondered what all of these people were doing. Were they working late? Were they at home, spending time with their families? Were they enjoying themselves? I sighed as I put on a coat. Going outside was probably the best thing to do right now, seeing as the awful stench of the room was still unbearable. Besides, fresh air would do me good, I thought. It would clear my head a little. As I passed along sushi restaurants, mini markets and fast-food establishments I welcomed the soft breeze blowing through my hair. I felt oddly at peace. The moon shone brightly up in the sky, and I smiled when I looked up at it.

When I reached a park I went to sit down on the nearest bench and watch passers-by. The city was surprisingly busy for this time of night, as I saw people in fancy clothes waiting for cabs to bring them to possibly even more fancy restaurants. There were youngsters talking and giggling wildly a few steps away and there were businessmen still dressed in their suits, no doubt walking towards the nearest bar. Eventually I decided to follow one of them, and I ended up at a place called "The Cozy Inn". Taking a seat right in front of the bar I ordered my drink and looked around the room. There seemed to be only one type of customer in this Inn: working men and women in tidy suits. I felt relieved that I hadn't changed since I left the office several hours ago so I was able to blend in with this crowd. A bearded man with a broad face came up to me and smiled.

All alone out here, missy? I've never seen you here before.

I nodded curtly, wishing for this creep to go away but instead he took a seat beside me. After he ordered his drink he began to talk to me, and to my utter surprise we had a pleasant conversation. When I decided it was time to go back to my flat, he handed me his business card. Call me tomorrow morning, during work hours. If you're interested I might be able to arrange a job for you.

Flabbergasted I let him put my cloak on me and we parted ways. Back at my smelly flat I changed into my nightgown. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and gasped. My hair was a deep red instead of the soft brown it'd always been.

To my utter surprise I called this man back next morning. I don't know what possessed me to ask for a job from a complete and utter stranger in a city I did not know yet. Something in his voice that evening had planted a seed in me that this was the right path to take, the natural way to go.

I talked to a friendly secretary who said she'd been expecting my call and then asked me if I could meet up with her for lunch to discuss the arrangements. We were to meet at "The Cozy Inn" again. I obliged and when I arrived at the bar around 1 'o clock she was already there, sipping on a mocha late. As I sat down I saw her gaze roaming over my body - first my feet, up to the top of my head. She almost looked like she was inspecting me. Then she nodded curtly, as if she had accepted me as Mitsubaya (or whatever the company's name was) material. I ordered a drink of my own. The woman who I had believed to be a secretary turned out to be the personal assistant of Han, the man that had offered me the job.

Mr. Hidori is an extremely important person in the industry, she whispered, as if this was secret intel, without him we would be nowhere. I nodded because I didn't know what else I could do. Then the woman laughed at me, shaking her head.

How could you understand? You're just a rookie! But don't you worry, Miss Sasaki, all will become clear later. I promise you. Her warm smile, showing off her perfectly white teeth, was inviting and creepy at the same time. And I did not like that tone. At all. But before I could open my mouth in protest, the personal assistant spoke again.

How do I know your name? Well, you're in our database. You might never have heard from us before but we know you. Don't let that frighten you - we're here to help you, people like you. We're all dealing with the same thing.

I had had enough of this cryptic talk and my stomach was clenching painfully as I ordered the check. The assistant wanted to pay for my drink but I insisted - I wanted nothing to do with these people. Something deep inside had stirred at this woman's words. What that was I didn't know yet, but I wasn't in the mood to find out. As I left the inn, I heard the assistant shout something at me.

Lee. That's my name. If you do change your mind, ask for Lee!

I was convinced I wanted to see that face again. We're all dealing with the same thing...

That afternoon I wandered through the nearly deserted streets - everybody was busy at work, of course - to try and take my mind off of things. I watched the birds as they pecked at remnants of food in garbage cans, I crouched beside the river that split the city in two halves. As I was sitting there, I thought about what it must be like to live on the other side. For some reason the skyscrapers didn't look as intimidating over there, and there were charming low-rises scattered among them, which indicated that these were places were families had their cozy homes. Somehow I wanted to be a part of them rather than remain stuck in this cold, concrete maze.

When the sun began setting I decided that I need to eat something - my stomach was grumbling quite painfully - and I went to look for a diner. Most restaurants in the city were either too expensive for my tiny savings account and had never been able to stomach fast food due to some rare food additives and preservatives allergies. Once again I ended up at "The Cozy Inn", where I had eaten a delicious ham sandwich the night before. Shrugging, I entered the bar and ordered my meal while scanning the customers to see if I recognized anyone. To my utter relief, Mr. Hidori was not present this time, and neither was Lee. I impolitely stuffed the sandwich into my mouth, gulped down some water and left as quickly as I could. Somehow I felt the stares of the other customers pierce through my back as I shut the door and walked out into the windy, crowded street once more.

I had done the unimaginable. An invisible force had drawn me back into the absurd world of the Mitsubaya company. I had experienced much difficulty finding the building, not in the least because of that group of punks that had pointed me in the wrong direction. These troubles didn't throw me off, though, and I heaved a sigh of relief as I walked up to the receptionist's desk and asked for Lee. A young woman smiled back at me, telling me to wait "for just a moment". She disappeared behind a door in the back and stayed away for what seemed like an hour. When she came back Lee was accompanying her. I tried to look nonchalant but Lee looked right through it.

Couldn't resist it, could you? That's what I thought. We all cave, eventually.

Then she slung her arm over my shoulder as if we had been the best of friends since our early childhood. I felt the urge to push her away but decided against it - after all, it wouldn't make a good first impression to club your superior on your first day of work.

You are dressed appropriately, that I don't have to teach you, Lee said as if she made some inside-joke. I looked down at my button-up shirt and tie, knee-length beige skirt and stockings. Who were these people that they employed despite the fact not knowing how to dress for work?

I'll give you a tour now, if you like.

I nodded and Lee commanded the receptionist to program the elevator to bring us to what she called "Level Nine". I did not want to seem imprudent so I refrained from asking what that meant.

When we reached Level Nine, I was escorted around rows and rows of cubicles with identical desks, identical computers, telephones and water bottles. My hope had been shot down entirely - this office was no different than the office I had just left. But, for the time being, this would have to do. I had to earn some money before I could pursue something more inspiring, that much I knew. To top off my feelings of dread my stomach started throbbing. Lee noticed my pained face and asked me if I wanted to sit down.

Do you need some water? I can get you some.

I started to sweat profusely and nodded. About a minute later the assistant returned, handing me a cup of odorless liquid. She was flashing her white teeth again.

What is this? I asked, feeling in my gut that this wasn't water.

Ah, of course. You know. Very observant, you are. That will certainly come in handy later. But don't fear - I'm not giving my poison or anything. Wait, let me take a sip so you can see that it's safe.

Lee quickly took my cup and drank. Feeling tired enough as it was, I complied and downed the rest of it without hesitation. Questions could still be asked later. It didn't take long for my head to clear up and my stomach to settle.

You alright again? That's good. It seems as if you have found us just the right time. Let's continue our tour.

And so we did. I was extremely relieved to hear that the job Mr. Hidori had assigned me didn't take place behind those desks but in a research room. Lee told me that, at first, I wouldn't be doing that much interesting work but she told me that I could really make a career here if I showed what I was capable of. When we reached a lab, Lee pointed me towards a gigantic machine that looked like a body scanner. In the corner of the room there was a cubicle, covered in glass, and she led me to it. To my surprise the glass was tinted from the inside out so I could not see what happened in the lab.

You're not claustrophobic, are you? Lee smirked. Because this will be your workplace. See that computer over there? She said, pointing at a large plasma screen with a panel that seemed to have more than a hundred buttons.That's going to be your new friend. You are going to process the results of what goes on in this lab, research room no.099. You will get streams of data uploaded to your computer almost continually and you are here to organize them, file them and write reports about them. Understood? Our tech guy will be here shortly to tell you how do to just that. Do you have any questions?

Still feeling queasy from my sudden bout of sweating and stomach cramps I couldn't really form a cohesive sentence but this one:

What exactly will I be researching?

Lee smiled. That, Miss Sasaki, is something you'll find out eventually. I wasn't handed answers like that on my first day here either.

I actually felt very happy working at Mitsubaya Inc. A few weeks passed in which I greedily absorbed all information about data processing that the tech guy (Miki was his name) gave me. I didn't even for a moment think about questioning exactly what was behind those endless numbers that were being uploaded onto my computer; my salary alone was enough to keep me satisfied and oblivious. Every evening me and my fellow research room analysts (at least that's what we jokingly called ourselves) went to The Cozy Inn to eat our dinner and talk about everything and nothing. I had a good time - these were all good and kind people that I didn't mind hanging out with. I never saw Mr. Hidori at the bar again, though. I thought it must have been serendipity or something that had caused us to meet that one night.

After the initial bliss that came at being able to live my own life had passed I started to notice some things that intrigued me. For example, all of us employees were strictly forbidden to bring our own drinks. We all had dozens of bottles of that liquid I was served on my first day stored in the cabinets in the corner of our research cubicles. Another thing I noticed was the apparent superiority complex of the data processors had when it came to the "office folk", as they were called, that sat behind the rows of computers I had first seen on my tour.

When I asked Miki about it, his responses were kind of evasive. He pretended it was all some kind of joke and that the office people would probably have nasty nicknames for us as well. My gnawing feeling that something wasn't right increased day by day. I ended up testing my theory one day by not drinking a single drop of our "company water". That night I felt sick and had to go home early. I lay in bed, my forehead feeling as if it were on fire, as I heard a knock on my door.

It's Lee!

It sounded as if she was standing in front of me. This apartment had paper-thin walls, after all. Sighing, I heaved myself out of bed and unlocked the door. Lee stood there, beaming at me as if I was her kid who had just uttered their first words, and grabbed me by the arm again.

Physical, much? I thought, but in reality I said: Be careful, Lee, if I have a bug you don't want to catch it.

The assistant however didn't respond and led me back to bed. She sat down on the second-hand duvet that I had bought from my first salary.

We missed you at the Inn, she started, staring at me with her piercing blue eyes.

Yeah, I'm feeling a little weak. I think I have a fever.

Lee responded with the most absurd line I'd ever heard. That's great!

Although I felt rage boiling inside me - I had my own pride, you know? - I suppressed it and asked her why she thought it was good.

This means, Lee started giddily, that you are ready for the next step. You are rebelling, you need answers. Well, we shall give them to you. I have to admit that you're the first one I mentored since I started to work for Mitsubaya Inc. So forgive me if my approach seems a little...eccentric. I've only just gotten used to the truth myself, after all.

Trying to wrap my mind around Lee's cryptic speech I pulled the covers over my body some more.

So...you're saying that I'm sick...because I didn't drink the company water? Is that what you mean by 'rebelling'?

The assistant giggled and clasped her hands together. That's exactly it! You'll learn to appreciate the necessity of XQ-23 - that's the real name of the drink by the way - to your system. See, your metabolism has already adjusted to some of its qualities from the first drop you drank! And before you start accusing me again of trying to poison you - we're doing this for your own good. The company, that is. We are not like everybody else, all of us, employees of Mitsubaya. Oh, yes, we might look like a bunch of professional business people but we have our own...qualities that set us apart from the masses. It's too sad that these masses, if they would know about us, would never be able to appreciate just how special we are. And that's why Mr. Hidori (the great-grandfather of the Mr. Hidori you met) founded Mitsubaya Inc. To prove, through scientific method and technology, that we are capable of things that are unimaginable to others. But we had to overcome one big hurdle first. We are now, after so many years, finally getting closer to cross that barrier.

What barrier?

Lee looked me deep in the eye. She seemed to be weighing her words.

Defy our creators. She finally said, staring at her lap.

I shook my head in disbelief. Was this woman talking about religion now? I was about to end the conversation when she spoke again.

Wait - I do not mean creators in the original sense. I mean the creators of our kind, the people that work at our firm, for example. Are you infertile?

Baffled at this strange question I just nodded.

Well, all of us are. And that's for a reason that you'll get to know later. What you do need to know now is that we are pooling all of our resources into finding out how to undo it. What did your doctor tell you?

I thought long and hard before I could answer. Thyroid problems.

Lee brushed a strand of golden hair out of her eyes. The funny thing is that it's actually true. But they did it on purpose because they are afraid of who we are.

I started feeling sicker than I had been before. I did not like the idea of being sucked into a conspiracy theory of this large a scale - or any scale, for that matter. I might have been raised to not ever question my superiors, but I did have a grain of critical thinking in me. Not wanting to offend Lee, I tried a different approach than bluntness.

What about Mr. Hidori? If he is one of 'us', then how could he be here? You said he has a great-grandfather. Sounds like a fertile family to me.

The assistant sighed. Of course, that's a completely rational question. The thing is, Mr. Hidori is not one of us. He even used to be one of our creators. Until he saw what kind of disadvantages they gave us. Until he saw their fear. Mr. Hidori is different. He loves his creations for what they are, he reverses them. In fact, if had had the option to become one of us I bet you he would.

A tense few minutes passed before I asked the question that was bugging me the most. So exactly what are we?

Of course my question was never answered. You'll find out when the time's right. Yeah, right! I was getting fed up with this mystic nonsense, yet I felt that I had to hang in there, that I needed to know the answers. I had never thought of myself as any different than the person next to me, but ever since I quit my old job that day, something had changed. It was as if I was finally becoming aware of who I really was, instead of the firm mold my family had tried to fit me in. I felt release, fear and excitement all at the same time. And getting to know the secrets behind Mitsubaya Inc did nothing to diminish those feelings. Whether I believed Lee's paranoid ramblings or not, I was intrigued enough to play along. It's not as if I had anything more important to do, right?

The morning that followed I nearly crawled my way back to my lab, greedily gulping down XQ-23 as I turned on my computer. My headache cleared in a matter of minutes and I began to feel much more energetic. Miki came to visit me that day with a fresh supply of the very same liquid, smiling brightly as I commented on how welcome this gift was.

It's something we all need, right? I joked, as if I was talking about plain old water. Miki's smile however turned into a grimace.

What's wrong? I asked him, feeling actual concern.

I...er...have never drank it before. He admitted shyly, looking at his feet. He looked like an eleven year old boy, ridden with guilt over a vase that had perished during a wild game of football. I grinned and asked him to try it out right now. I mean, what's the harm? It's not champagne, but it'll do.

I was surprised to see agony in his eyes as he shook his head. N-no...No, I'm not thirsty, he mumbled. Not too long after he made up an excuse about having to rewire some keyboards and left the room.

I had a busy day ahead of my so I didn't particularly spend much time thinking about this incident. There were lots of files to sort, data to analyze and reports to write. Never having had too much to do at Mitsubaya Inc I was rather surprised by the sudden increase of workload. It wasn't just me that was affected by this, though, the whole firm seemed to be buzzing with activity whereas it had been operating at a fairly leisurely pace mere weeks ago. I was glad to finally be able to pour my heart and soul into my work, tedious as some bits of it turned out to be. But I was doing something, accomplishing something of my very own. I had chosen to do this rather than my family. For the first time in my life I could sense a feeling of pride towards my work. I became faster and more efficient at collecting and filing all of the information that was constantly being uploaded unto my computer and I found new ways to organize it, methods that even impressed Lee. In short, I found out I had a knack for computers and I thrived. Lee, however, didn't seem in the least surprised that I did so well. The only thing she did was praise me with a smile that resembled that of a parent being proud of her little kid achieving something. Strangely, I didn't mind her attitude towards my shift from insecure obedient girl to a blossoming young woman at all. It even encouraged me to work harder and keep improving.

One evening at The Cozy Inn I was particularly enjoying myself with a couple of colleagues, recollecting embarrassing childhood memories. I was so immersed in our chatter, our inside-jokes, our friendly teasing, that I didn't notice Mr. Hidori coming in at exactly eleven 'o clock. I gasped as I saw him standing at the bar, ordering a drink. I quickly walked up to him to thank him - after all, this was the kind man that had given me, a complete stranger, a dream job. But as I was talking to him, my voice shaky with excitement and anticipation, he didn't even seem to register my words. His eyes were dull and it looked like he was looking right through me. The only acknowledgment he gave me was a curt nod before he turned his back on me to take a sip from his drink. Feeling embarrassed and let down at the same time I slipped back into my seat. Miranda, one of the other data researchers I had come to know quite well, noticed my sulky face and tried to comfort me.

We all had to go through that. Mr. Hidori is an extremely generous man but after you have been fully settled into the company, he will start looking for other potential employees and he seems to forget all about us. Don't take it personally, Qe-Lin, he's just a very busy man.

While her words softened my disappointment a bit I could not let the matter go. That night, as I lay in bed, I wasn't able to fall asleep because my mind kept wandering back to that lifeless gaze of Mr. Hidori. Something wasn't quite right; when I was expressing my gratitude towards him he seemed to try to force himself to not listen to me - as if every single word I said pained him, cut into him like a knife through butter. His eyes may have looked uninterested, I had felt that this was a conscious choice he had made. What on earth could he be disappointed about? I was working harder than ever, and I was sure he must have been briefed about my development by Lee, who was his assistant after all.

When I finally slipped into oblivion I dreamed about faces. When I looked at them more closely I saw that they had discernible no eyes, no nose, no mouth. They were just faces. Nothing more.

I didn't know what possessed me to do it. I certainly hadn't anticipated it, nor could I believe it as I pondered on it later. I had come on to Miki. We had been friends for quite some time and I didn't even know I had feelings for him other than pure, platonic appreciation. But at that moment, in my workspace, his eyes were so fiery, piercing right through my skin and muscle into my very soul - or did my mind make that up? - and made me unable to resist. I kissed him. He kissed me back. It was quite an experience. We stayed in the cubicle for quite some time until my conscience started protesting, thinking that this was wrong and I nearly pushed him out, mumbling some excuse about having lots of stuff to do. He had looked at me in utter bewilderment but he must have seen that I was serious, because he left without another word. Trying to take my mind off of what had just happened I jumped headfirst into my work that day, just like I always did when I was troubled by something.

Lee asked me if we could speak in private at the bar, after work. I saw it in her eyes that she knew. Not knowing much about Mitsubaya Inc's policy on relationships between co-workers I followed her to the other side of the room with a sinking feeling in my gut. Don't let me get fired. Please, just don't. I repeated like a mantra in my head. Sitting across from Lee a tense pause passed before she spoke. And what she talked about was not what I had expected at all.

You've been doing a marvelous job, Qe-Lin. You manage to keep growing yet retain your fresh view on things. I'm thoroughly impressed, you are going beyond what has been expected of you. I think it's time to give you a promotion.

I couldn't suppress a massive sigh of relief. Lee didn't seem to notice it though and went on to talk about the details of my new responsibilities.