It wasn't exactly what you'd call comfy, or even clean. In fact, it looked more like an over-turned graveyard than a home. You spot a dirty, raggy beanbag in the corner and walk to lie down on it. It sags under your weight and feels so horrible to sit on you're sure it's stuffed with bones, too.



You manage to rest your legs for some time, but after a while the boredom sinks in. Someone's got to live here, there was a sign near the entrance saying that this was a rare bone museum of some sort, afterall. Maybe it's abandoned... but no, there's a table on the other end of the room with an old, chipped mug on it. The liquid inside, which looks like tea, is still steaming. Your backside is really starting to become numb - whoever sits on this beanbag must have nerves of steel or no sense at all. You get up, the beanbag crunching under you.

A small cloud of dust rises after each step you make as you head towards a small tunnel you hadn't noticed before. Well, I suppose you could call it a tunnel, though it's more of a handmade hole in the wall. The owner probably didn't hear you come in, so you decide to go look for them. You climb through it, and fall out the other end. There is no floor where it should be, instead: just air. Thankfully you only topple down a metre or so, so it doesn't hurt. Standing up, you examine the surroundings. There are bones everywhere. But this time, they're laid out in neat rows with little labels on them. You can see skeletons put together and stuck into the muddy-looking wall on both sides. There appears to be a stuffed mutant Lenny sculpture near the end of the passage, too. This must be the bone museum!



Examining the bones, you come closer to the stuffed mutant Lenny. It looks so real! You almost fall backwards, gasp loudly and realise it IS real when it moves its feathery head to stare right at you. It doesn't look happy.
I suppose you're here to see my collection?" he says in a deep, soft voice, full of aggravation and apathy. You nod, not really knowing how to answer properly since you're still in a bit of a shock. "Have you paid?" he asks, still staring at you with unblinking eyes. It's quite unnerving.
Er..." you stammer, "Yeah I dropped the neopoints at the entrance but there was no one there so I just decided to-" Something about the look the bird is giving you makes you stop speaking. He nods, finally closes his eyes for a few brief seconds, and says: "Alright then, come with me. I'll be your guide for the Museum. You can look all you want but there's an avid history between each and every bone you see in my collection. And there's no point just looking and admiring, you've got to know the history. Makes it all the more interesting.


You follow him to the other end of the passage, and the bird points to the first bone.
We'll start here." He says, simply. "Oh, and by the way, my name is Sam." You catch a glimpse of a small smile.






Petpet bone" isn't a very good name for this piece. I dug this particular example out of an ancient tomb in the Lost Desert. It is the bone of a brilliant Noil who, as I read in the heiroglyphs, was actually the first petpet to step out for petpet rights. You see, before that they were treated as slaves, only the Kadoatie was given more respect and kept as a pet. So yes, a very valuable find. I would've preferred to bring out the whole skeleton, but unfortunately a passing Yurble scared me away. Something to do with digging up some sort of Shrine, I think. Cranky fellow, that one was.

* * * *
The Bone Sword... wow, memories. This I got from the Mystery Island Mystic after helping find some random faerie. Can't exactly remember the details, but this sword was one of the best weapons I owned. If I'm not mistaken, the bones are those of some legendary neopets creature that lives in the volcano...

* * * *
Yet another... er, gift from the Island Mystic. Well, I kind of actually dug this up in his backyard and I think he got a little bit angry that I'd taken it, but since he hasn't asked for it back yet I see no harm in keeping it here. The bones are real elephante bones, I thought I heard him speak about knowing where an elephante graveyard is, and that that's where the bones came from. Unique piece!

* * * *
This bone chair is a right famous one! You know the bone chair stamp? This is the original one on it! I can't quite remember where I found this, it was ages ago. Might've actually won an auction. The bones are Chomby bones, nice and strong, it'll seat anyone without a problem! It's gotten a bit grey over the years, though. I need to polish it up again soon.

* * * *
Oh, don't mind this. This is where I either keep any spare bones to litter all over the entrance floor or make things out of, or where I brew them so that they don't go foul or start to smell. You've got to be careful with bones! Got to take good care of them.

* * * *
This is one of King Coltzan's bones! I caught Kanrik trying to burry it on the coast of I think Krawk Island it was, but I thought he was just littering back then. And I came home to find out it was Coltzan's! It's a bit battered in places, but otherwise very well presevered!

* * * *
There it is! The bone I risked my dearest life for! This bone is from the Tyrannian Swamp, and it belongs to a grarrl if I'm not mistaken. One of the biggest Grarrls I've ever seen, put to ground by the forces of nature... the me-risking-my-life-part comes in when I actually tried to take a bone out. It was too good an opportunity for a unique item! It's even got some mud from the swamp dripping off!

* * * *
My most pride and dearest possension. The feathers on it are mine actually. The bone is magical, as it came from a great magician whose name I unfortunately can't remember now. This bone brings me luck and sometimes astounding things happen if I bring it with me.

* * * *
Couldn't believe my luck when I guessed how much the marrow weighed! They originally wanted to give me the blade but I insisted on the bone because it's got such a lovely pun behind it, too!

* * * *

Right, and now onto the skeletons! I don't have that many since I've just started collecting them, but nonetheless, let's take a look.

Incomplete, but I love it! I heard this Moehog skull is a very powerful Battledome weapon, but I don't like to go in there. This skull creeps me out sometimes, you see. It's still got the eyes, and no matter how many times I've tried I can't seem to get rid of them!

* * * *
Ah, the little skeleton creature I love to bits. I'm convinced it's alive, even though I distinctly remember digging it up out of an abandoned grave. A very very fine addition to my collection, this is!

* * * *
Yet another skeletal creature! This one only looks to be alive, though. I found the poor fella stranded on the beach, half covered by sand and seaweed. Polished and cleaned him in no time, and now he's what you see here!

* * * *
The last piece of my collection, or at least the stuff I'm showing other people. This foot came off one of the TNT staff, I think. Or they donated it or something, and I remember being there and snatching it. It makes a very nice ornament with the candle. Illuminated this room very nicely with a skeletal glow. Wonderful!

* * * *



With these words, you realise you're back at the entrance to the hole in the wall, feeling quite dazed. You never thought there was so much to bones. The glow filling the chamber is quite soothing, you really want to stay a bit longer. But Sam coughs quietly and helps you clamber back through the hole to the entrance room. He follows you out and goes to sit on the beanbag. You stand for a few seconds, feeling like you've forgotten to do something which was nagging you for a long time.
Well then, I hope you enjoyed your stay." Sam says to the wall, examinining the fine litter of bones in the dirt. You notice he's holding the mug that was on the table, but he... he never got up to get it! How strange.
Thanks, it was great." you say feebly, but he nods.
People are usually strange after they see them. I've noticed this." He gives you a piercing look and something tells you you should be going. You thank him once again and head out of the door and into the light. Being underground, you'd completely forgotten how hot it was outside. The heat makes you feel uncomfortable... suddenly you remember what it was you'd wanted to ask Sam.


Heading out of the forest, you wonder if that beanbag had really been all that uncomfortable... You pass the two signs pointing back to the Museum which had led you inside in the first place.



You smile to yourself as the forest is left behind. You'll definitely remember this place. Maybe even tell a few others about it...



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