I dedicate this page to Napoleon - October 31, 2004 to July 25, 2006. I hope the toes in the cat afterlife are as fun to chew on as they seemed to be here.



Before you go through and flip through things I found amusing, know these three things:

1. I appreciate and welcome all comments, good or bad. Please, once you are done, either send me rave reviews or rant about how unfunny I am. I like getting mail.

2. Most people who read these think I'm pretty darn funny. The friends I see every day don't. You have been warned.

3. I am not responsible for broken backs (because of falling out of chairs in hysterics) or concussions (from falling asleep out of boredom and whacking your head on the keyboard). Please don't blame me, it's not my fault.

Anyway, thanks for reading that and enjoy!

Just a note. My random screenies are on


My mail screenies (hate and otherwise) are on


And my Altador Cup screenies are on



Stupid sister, depriving me of the happiness of guessing her name...


THOSE TINY ANNOYING PEBBLES THAT ALWAYS GET STUCK IN YOUR SHOE!


Dude, that's a lot of smileys. Shouldn't those conflicting emotions implode and just destroy each other?


Old people with knives! WHAT IF THEY ESCAPE THEIR HOVEROUNDS?! RUN! RUN!


*attempts to hide in the HC before realizing that's just stupid*


Stupid hypocrite tarnishing the name of vegetarians everywhere...


Now back to the real show! GARGLE-HEAD! NGFFFTIPEIOWJEOIJROAJSODIaSDasDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!


Y'know, if someone wanted to, they could very easily figure out this obnoxious person's username. Very easily. But it's not worth it. Trust me. It'd be way too much fun, and it's far too easy to find.


Logic: Defeater of gargle-heads and Katami alike! It's an equal-opportunities hero!


All the cliched comments are taken. Ah well. This is valuable space I shouldn't waste. ... ... ...
PSLIGYERDOBHUNT
DEVIISM
QUACK


Wow. Someone is taking my supposedly sarcastic opinion seriously. This is disturbing. *goes off to mull on this*


stupid lame mumble mimble warf...


This needs a funny comment. Let me go and drag Ao or Pyropete in here. They're comedic geniuses.


lYk 0nG1SHIFTYSHIFTYSHIFT1! 1T0T@L3 D1DN'T W0RK1SHIFTYSHIFTYSHIFTYSHIFTYSHIFTYshift!


Louse? Liverwort? Littlebunnyfufu?


There should be a minimum IQ to be able to use that avatar.


I also offer help with a twenty-ton weight, a bazooka, the superflu, and a loon. Get your free help TODAY!


Dude.


My friends don't have to break me down to feel better about themselves. OH! YOU GOT POMPEIIED!


If Neopets shut down forever, I'd lock myself in my dorm room and never come out because I know people like her would be wandering the streets.


And people say I'm sadistic. Whatever gives them that idea?


Katami with the flu, everybody! YAY!


Mmmmm, pretzels...


It's not the spamming that bothers me nearly as much as the lying. I WANT TO TALK TO A BOARD!


Hahaha, crack...


Hey, I have a face. Could it be she's talking to me? Or maybe to you, since it seems you have a face as well?


Woot! Go apathy!


Obnoxious little creature of the snot lagoon...


And then I snipe it with eight and a half seconds to go. KATAMI: ALWAYS VICTORIOUS IN THE FACE OF WEIRD GUYS CAMPED OUT IN THEIR GARAGES!


Let us all go on a quest for a box, sir knights!


Wow, this thing shows when I posted on the board, doesn't it? I mean, WHOA! THAT'S REALLY COOL!






Haha, I scarred someone for life...*sighs contentedly*


Why must gargle-heads be so contradictory, why?!


*hums a song that this screenie reminds her of*


I am the Great Simplifier.


Well, she was right about one thing. She does totally need help.


And you have the nerve to make mediocre screenies... At least I acknowledge my screenies are horrible...


Hey, it's Bozo the Clown! Du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-DUUUUUUUU!


Pffft, my short bus pwns your bus any day.


Hey, I should try that! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP!BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP!BUY FROM MY SHOP!BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP! BUY FROM MY SHOP!BUY FROM MY SHOP!BUY FROM MY SHOP! Nope, didn't work. Ah, well...


*bows low before the siggy* Must please siggy...must please siggy...


What's this I see in the crystal ball now? Not your fortune, no, but a face. A face of someone who is quite happy and excited. It's coming closer, ever closer, brandishing a... a... AIEEEEEEEEEEEE! IT'S GOT A REPORT BUTTON! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!


Age is no indicator of intelligence. My sister is two and she can already type better than more of the people on the boards.


I don't think she got it.


I'm sure countless seconds of hard researched preceded this breakthrough.





This raises interesting questions. What if zafaras really are velociraptors and are terrorizing all your other pets the minute you turn around?


KA-TA-MI! KA-TA-MI! KA-TA-MI!


*grabs some pretzels and sits back to watch the hilarities ensue*


BOW BEFORE YOUR GREAT PICKLE MASTER!



Probably me, since I'm now holding an empty roll of duct tape.


*sniffles* My first hate board. I'm so happy!


Why anyone would go through this much effort for nearly virtual friends is beyond me.


Well? Can they?


This sudden clarity blinds me.


You know what would be really cool? If passion really did flip and fly. That would be awesome to watch.


This person eventually rejoined the guild and Molly and Lauren were very cheerful. I ignored him. I can be a brat sometimes.


I hate it when my inspirations come from medicine bottles. In fact, I just hate being sick. Stupid un-sick medicine thing...


Her current pot looks big enough, actually.


Some people are greedy. I'm just rude.


Ha. I went an entire screenie without pointing out spelling errors.


It raises interesting questions though. What if there really was a plushie rebellion? Could people still get the ZDAP avatar?



^The gargle-head's fate.


What about you? Do you think?


Ghost Item Glitch: 11/13/05


She didn't want it. Why, I wonder?


Vegan chocolate still makes me hyper...@_@


*has performed her civic duty for this lifetime*


Dontcha hate it when you have the chance to pwn and you blow it all on being helpful?


Have you ever wondered what would happen if all the world's funnel cakes joined up into one really huge 2000 foot tall funnel that could eat people? How would you get the powdered sugar on it then?


Won't comment on siggy...won't comment on siggy...

The Tale of Katami and the Gargle-Heads


When Katami is uber-high on sugar...


Is it actually physically possible to shift eyes?


You should use it too. It just kind of rolls off the tongue like a mint or a songbird.


*does the happy compliment song-dance-thingy*


You're going to tell me I'm being over-obsessive, aren't you? AREN'T YOU? ADMIT IT! THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE THINKING! WELL, YOU CAN'T TAKE MY PRECIOUS FROM ME! IT'S MINE, ALL MINE! YOUR STEALINESS CAN'T REPEL DEFENSINESS OF THIS MAGNITUDE! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!




Ha.





*hopes beyond all hope that these are in the right order*