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Denizens of Neopia;
It has come to my attention that some Neopians, though they put up the facade of being reputable and respectable, enjoy provoking unarmed creatures such as myself to fight them, even if they are in dire need of going to the hospital. Has my creator, Dr. Frank Sloth been that totally cruel and vile that it triggers an instantaneous rage within those who challenge me?
If so, then Neopia may as well BE lost to the likes of Dr. Frank Sloth. Who I am doesn't matter, but for those who insist, I too, am called Dr. Sloth. However, I am not an exact clone of my creator...more like an experiment in attempt to splice and alter skeith DNA to make a new breed of minion. Unfortunately for my creator, I was a failure that was locked away for an extended period of time, which had faded from his memory until a year ago when I was awakened from my suspended animation tube by an erroneous mutant grundo.
Since that time, I've done quite a bit of soul searching to figure out where I truly belong. Obviously, I wasn't a mindless drone that Dr. Frank Sloth could order around. I traveled over all the continents of Neopia, and even lived in a place that, thanks to connections, is classified as non-existent. Why, you ask? The reason is simple. If people knew for a fact that that place truly existed, then its splendor would be ruined and its number one food source would be depleted far more quickly than it can be created.
Most of this past year had went by without any word as to my creator's whereabouts. That is, until recently. I had no sooner locked up the gallery for the night several weeks ago, when I had overheard some Neopians talk of rumors that Dr. Frank Sloth was bound to make a comeback within a month's time. The more I heard, the more I realized that though he doesn't appear in Neopia Central, or any other local for that matter, very often, my creator seemed to have a legion of minions of all walks of life.
Since I had to get questions out of him anyway, I went to search for him with a lupe contact that wanted a piece of the action. Unfortunately, when we got to his personal quarters, we found Dr. Frank Sloth had developed a few 'sloth'-like qualities as of late and had barely woke up from a nap. Unfortunately, the door was open and Dr. Frank Sloth had bent over to pick up something he had dropped on the floor. A series of unfortunate events led up to where Dr. Frank Sloth needed to take a trip to the hospital due to a bite he received from the lupe. Of course, my contacts, once they found out as to what had happened, decided to come up with a whole different story about how backlogged they were with half finished plots that they were never able to get around to dealing with the return of Dr. Frank Sloth.
Right...and if you believe that last bit, then I have a map of a place that supposedly doesn't exist that I could sell
you for 5,000 neopoints. Of course, once you find out that it was all a fake, I'll deny everything. Until the next time
we meet, I leave you with one piece of sage advice: Never moon a werelupe.
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