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- Today's Petpet Spotlight -
Petpet Name: Sparf
Out onto the stage walks a spotted techo in a top hat
and tuxedo. He takes the stance of one comfortable in
the spotlight, and grins at the audience.
"Hi there, ladies and germs!" says he, executing a
neat bow. "My name's Meramo, and I'm here to introduce
to you the magic of my wonderful singing petpet."
The crowd oohs. Meramo glances knowingly off of stage
left, then back towards his crowd.
"First, I'd like to take a moment to introduce
tonight's headlining act. This lovely pet and I have
been together for... well, let's just say quite some
time. I swear to you there isn't a petpet with a
better voice than the one my little girl has." The
techo beams with obvious pride, and the crowd awwws.
Meramo goes on. "She first started singing in the Lost
Desert, out behind our house. When people started
noticing her voice, though, we took the act on the
road. We've been all over Neopia by now, performing in
various venues- in fact, her unique talents have made
us quite a sum of NP, I'm proud to say."
The audience is shifting in their seats now,
interested, and Meramo notices their anticipation. He
takes off his top hat and, spreading his long hands to
the side, he steps forward. His voice is loud and
pleasant, carefully modulated but obviously excited.
"And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my most distinct
pleasure to present... my marvelous singing kadoatie!"
He stops for a moment.
The audience holds their breaths. Meramo turns again
towards stage left.
"Guys, bring 'er out!" he calls, and two black-clad
stagecrew members drag a stool onto the stage.
The creature atop the stool stares balefully at the
"Sparf," it says.
There begin to be murmurs of dissent among audience
Meramo spreads his hands placatingly. "Folks, folks, I
know she might not look like much- but I swear to you
that this little kadoatie has the most amazing
voice... C'mon, Sparf, give us a song."
The mass of spiky brownish fur swivels its head to
look at its owner.
"Sparf," it says again.
The techo standing onstage behind the mutant kadoatie
begins to laugh nervously, eyeing his unusual pet.
"C'mon, Sparf! Sing for them!" he whispers.
"Sparf?" asks Sparf, her voice loud if not
particularly melodic. Her owner is practically jumping
up and down.
"Yes, Sparf- 'Sing'! Sing!"
Finally, Sparf seems to understand. She turns her head
towards the audience and raises one paw delicately.
Her asymmetrical eyes sparkle like topaz in the bright
lights, and, after a moment's breath, the little
kadoatie tilts her head back and lets forth a noise
that would have sounded more appropriate coming from
"Sppppaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarf!" she cries. Most of
the audience cringes.
Meramo, however, seems very pleased.
"Great job, Sparf!" He calls, doing a little
tap-dance. "Sing some more, huh?"
Sparf, however, needs no encouragement. Her great
gaping tooth-filled maw opens very wide, and soon she
is producing a veritable symphony of yowls, mews and
One look at the audience shows that they are less than
pleased with the performance. About ninety percent of
them have their hands/paws over their ears, and one
particularly sensitive checkered korbat is rolling in
the aisles in an attempt to drown out the noise.
After five or six minutes of Sparf's 'singing', an
exasperated silver lupe raises himself out of his
seat. He addresses the techo on stage.
"Look... that thing's driving me crazy! I'll... I'll
pay you to quiet it down!"
Meramo looks interested.
"Yes?" He glances at the rest of the audience. "Would
anyone else like Sparf to be quiet?"
The worn-out audience members nod and form a line
leading up to the stage. They all deposit a handful of
neopoints in Meramo's top hat, then go back to their
After he's collected all he's going to collect, the
techo bows to the crowd, goes over to Sparf, and drops
a treat in her mouth. The noise ceases instantly.
Meramo makes another small bow then hefts Sparf into
his arms and carrying her off-stage. The audience is
too tired-out to clap.
"Good show," Meramo whispers to Sparf when they are
safely in the wings.
"Sparf," she agrees, and starts contentedly,
competently, humming a pretty melody.
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