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Petpet Spotlight

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- Today's Petpet Spotlight -

Petpet Name: Cerbearus
Owner: demented_dreamer
Pet: Dmitri_Atreides
Breed: Bearog


About Cerbearus:

You hear the sound of heated argument between three distinct voices:

"I REFUSE to go out there with that numbskull!"

"Aww, are you scawed? Wighty's fwightened!"

"Would you two just shut up already? Remember what the Boss said, we gotta show that goody-two-shoes pussycat who the better petpet is!"

"Right!"

"Left?"

There is an exasperated sigh and then a SMACK.

"Ow! Hey, what was that for?"

"Wright, just ignore him, jeez. Lefty, leave the talking to me, would ya?"

A few muttered words and grumbles later, a Bearog steps out. The center head coughs and offers what he thinks to be a reassuring (toothy) smile. Meanwhile the right head has a death glare fixed on the left, who is sticking his tongue out.

"Uh, hey, the name's Cerbearus, collectively that is. I know the first thing you're wondering is how's a petpet of our variety comes in three different colors. Well usually in a bearog, everything is spread equally between its three heads, but we came out a little... off-balance so to speak. Wright here's got a bit more of the medulla oblongata, if ya know what I mean, and Lefty (and although there is a color disparity, most of the time we like to call him Blonde) is lacking in quite a few aspects. I of course am the real brains of the operation, not countin' the Boss that is."

Wright whips his gaze towards the center head, "What's that I heard you say, Mids? Something about the real brains of the operation? Just because I got a little temper doesn't mean you're smarter! And considering you think you're so smart, right now you look an awful lot like red meat to me!"

"Oooh, Midsy's in twouble now!"

"Shut UP BLONDE, I don't need comments from the peanut gallery!"

"Hey, hey Wright, calm down, you know I was just tellin' them what they wanna hear? The main head's always gotta be the smart one, then there's the Angry Thug Head and the Giggling Idiot Head, that's just how the stereotype goes!"

"Heehee, Midsy called you a giggling idjit." Lefty leans a little too close and Wright gets another smack in with his snout.

"Whatever, just tell them the story."

"Ah, okay, the story. Well this is a harrowing tale, a close encounter of the Turmac kind. One day I decided it would be worth a trip to the Great Turmaculous to see if we could bring something good back for the Boss. The Boss is a pteri who admires initiative, you see. So we went down there and gave the Turmac a good kick, and what does that sleeping brute do? Eat us! Just lolls his big slimy tongue out and swallows us whole! What? That couldn't be true you say, because we're still here? What? You think I'm a liar? Ask these two, they were there! Well anyway, so we're sitting in the dark of the beast's cavernous stomach, along with all the axe bushes, t-shirts, Meridell food, and other petpets that have been eaten by the Turmaculous, and I'm thinking of a daring escape plan."

"Don't you mean I was thinking of the daring escape plan while you were crying like a baby and saying how we'd never get out of there?"

"No, I mean I was thinking of the escape plan while you were trying to beat your own brother senseless, because he was laughing at you. Anyway, the plan was this: What goes up, must come down."

"I think you mean, where there's an entrance, there's an exit."

"Yeah, that. Anyway, we had gotten eaten, so all we had to do was go back out the same way, right? Luckily, we didn't have to wait for the Turmac to wake up again though, because the Boss came looking for us and he heard us arguing inside. He called to us to take cover, levered open the beast's mouth, and tossed in an Explosive Pizza Pasty! (The Boss likes fire you see) That woke him right up, boy that had to be some bad heartburn. He let out a massive burp and the force of it expelled us out."

"Hehe, I was swallowed by the Turmaculous, but I got a t-shirt."

"Yeah, that's all Blonde ever talks about, and he can't even wear the shirt because he doesn't have arms."

"SO? Stupid, you didn't even GET a t-shirt!"

"What do I need some dumb shirt for? And you're one to call anybody stupid, all you got between your ears is wax and more fluff!"

"Better than some medoola ublungoda!"

"Why are you so annoying! There's no way I'm related to you! ARGH!"

Mids gives a pleading look, "Uh, please don't judge us by our current disfunctionality, really we are SUCH a happy family! But yeah, we gotta go give the boss a report, later!" He lets out a nervous laugh before hurrying off.




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