Reporting live from Neopia Circulation: 196,736,250 Issue: 938 | 18th day of Relaxing, Y23
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Your questions answered!


Read the answers to the most commonly asked Neopets questions this week in the Editorial section. Each week the most popular questions will be answered by one of the creators of Neopets, so keep checking back to stay updated.


Quote of the Week


Rohane shook his head in disbelief before gesturing for the Lupe and Wocky to go forward. In the back of his mind, he started wondering if it was better to turn back—to shop at the market before crowds gathered around him like flies to rancid meat. But a pang of hunger made the decision for him: he was going in. Jeran gave the rusted doorknob a solid tug. The door pivoted with a screech, announcing their presence with all the subtlety of a mewling petpet. A hushed silence fell across the dining room as the duo made their way inside. Rohane followed a few steps behind, instinctively pulling his hood closer to further hide his face and ears. As soon as the Blumaroo stepped through the door, a wave of eyes flicked upon him, instantly branding him as an outsider. The Blumaroo couldn’t help but gulp. Waning candlelight on each long table illuminated the unkempt, rugged faces of the patrons from below, making them appear menacing. Cobwebs hung from the dimly lit wooden beams, casting rhomboid shadows upon the wall. Sure, Rohane and his friends had been to some less-than-ideal inns over the years, but this place made even the most ramshackle rooms look like a luxury hotel.


A Slushie Slinger’s Take on Neopia’s Top Slushies



Hi! I’m Tara, one of Altador’s pro Slushie Slingers, and I’m here to dish out the juicy gossip around the coolest, rarest, and just plain best slushies in Neopia! Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’re familiar with the Altador Cup’s iconic slushie trio: Zeenana, Jumbleberry, and Chokato. But why are these the only flavours being served? Aren’t there over a hundred other types of slushies? It turns out, so many fans were flooding Altador that we needed to streamline operations -- no one wants to miss a Yooyuball match because the line was too long. Limiting our slushie stations to just three kinds helped a lot, but part of the trick was to choose really distinct, polarising flavours. When each person has a clear favourite, ordering goes super quick. Also, these fruits are super easy to blend in huge batches (I’ll let you in on a secret: we don’t even peel the Zeenanas!)

Historical Analysis of the Altador Cup



Good morning sports fans! It is everyone’s favourite time of the year again – it is time for the ALTADOR CUP! This year’s event will be the sixteenth time that nations from Neopia duke it out for the coveted trophy. Personally, I enjoy analyzing data; therefore, this is an article discussing each nation that participates in the Altador Cup, analyzing their averages, and ranking them accordingly. Some things to discuss beforehand – every nation’s ranking has been rounded to the closet whole number; therefore, some teams might average the same finish, but their ranking is further determined by the actual decimal value. Also, when teams are mentioned to be in the top half of competitors or bottom half of competitors, remember that means 1st through 9th places (top half) and 10th through 18th places (bottom half) respectively.

A Spooky New Goal Scorer: Interview with Krell Vitor


Two weeks have passed since the start of arguably the most important event of the year in Neopia. The air is filled with excitement, anticipation... and the joyful screaming of devoted fans from all over Neopia who are cheering for one (or more, in some cases) of the eighteen teams that are competing this year to win the Altador Cup and take the big prize back to their homeland. Regardless of the land they're representing, all these athletes are worthy of glory...

Other Stories
"Sympathy for a Slushie Slinger" by thatdoodlebunny
The ref’s whistle blew, signalling the end of the practice skirmish. Just in time too. Tulay, the newbie on Mystery Island’s team, had just sent a Darigan Yooyu through the net, cementing the team’s victory that day. Sure, this was a practice match, but it was the last practice match before the real games begin. She felt a large hand clap her on the back and a friendly, booming laugh. “Nice work today, Tulay,” her Mynci captain, Volgoth, chuckled, “The Darigan ones can be pretty tricky to handle.” Tulay smiled back, “Let’s hope I can keep this level of control in a real match. Most of the time, they go backwards on me.” “Oh yeah. Right into the net, eh Selmon?” Volgoth said cheekily. “Oh, like you haven’t!” the defender called back from across the field. This playful ribbing was common within the team. Tulay was so relieved to have been welcomed so easily.

"A Hero's Ballad: The Marrow" by parody_ham
”I can’t live like this anymore…” The words escaped Rohane’s lips as he sat sulking in the courtyard garden, face buried into his hands. An amber sky slowly shifted to eventide as his stomach grumbled in defiance. When he heard that the kitchen staff would be making meatloaf for the fifth time this week, he voluntarily chose to pick up his own groceries and cook a simple meal. That was the plan, at least. Now he wished that there was a morsel of leftovers in the mess hall, a sliver of meat loaf or a helping of creamed corn. Just the thought of any sort of food made his mouth water. But only a single roll remained, one he polished off in five seconds flat. “You should’ve asked earlier,” the head chef said, pausing briefly from his cleanup while his staff wiped down tables and swept the floors. The sweaty green Moehog had thinning brown hair lost in part from the frequent shenanigans of the Order.

"PRIME TIME SLUSHIE" by cazcazig
Back in year three, during the Month of Eating, a yellow Wocky professor used a time-travelling machine that crashed somewhere in ancient Tyrannia. Carnivorous vegetation and giant creatures dominated the land. The professor recorded things he saw on a Tatty Notebook. He discovered Burger Forest and Tomato Sauce Swamp, among many other primordial things only made possible in Neopia. Somehow, the yellow Wocky disappeared after gathering enough food for his experiments. Some say he was finally able to fix the time machine. Others believe he was eaten by the Lair Beast. Eighteen years and two months into the future bring us to Y21, the month of Relaxing. However, there would be no time to "relax" because the 16th Altador Cup had just begun. In honour of this special event, Virtuburger would be promoting Chicken Yooyu Balls and Altador Style Bratwurst for 50% off.


Collectable Sea Shells


This week's issue is brought to you by: Collectable Sea Shells
 
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PRIME TIME SLUSHIE
Back in year three, during the Month of Eating, a yellow Wocky professor used a time-travelling machine that crashed somewhere in ancient Tyrannia...

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What? No!! Collab with Romina_R

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