teh 1337est n00zpaper Circulation: 96,860,727 Issue: 187 | 22nd day of Eating, Y7
Home | Archives Articles | Editorial | Short Stories | Comics | New Series | Continued Series

The Botanist's Alphabet

by costa_rican_girl


A GARDEN—Have you ever visited your Aunt Margarie's house? If so, did you ever go out to the backyard to have a picnic? If so, was your mind boggled by all the strange-looking foliage surrounding you? If you answered yes to all of these questions, then this article is for you. Then again, perhaps you are simply an aspiring botanist. Or maybe you just feel like reading an article about plants. Or maybe not. No matter what, this article is definitely for you. Well, we botanists here at the Neopian Times Gardening Center have compiled together this list to help you with your gardening. We have picked the best flowers, trees, and shrubs to perfect it with wonderful beauty.

A = Atrabud

Rarity: 25

Description: This unusual plant’s roots actually grow above the ground. The roots often have bright patterns on them, making them just as attractive as the flower itself.

Information: These interesting organisms originated in the depths of Maraqua, thus the abnormal manner of growth. The roots would absorb loads of water, creating an unusually heavy plant. Eventually the Atrabud was accidentally brought to Meridell by an old farmer.

B = Boadaisy

Rarity: 65

Description: The Boadaisy is the pride of many Neohomes with its purple flowers, silvery-green, marbled stems and magenta stripes.

Information: Boadaisies are extremely cheap flowers, no matter what the price is. Their flimsy stems (though beautiful) can barely hold itself up, let alone the flowers! Sure, they look nice – if you keep them from toppling over by attaching it to a stick. If you ask me, these plants are not worth the hassle. Find something else to brighten up your Neohome.

C = Chick-a-Daisy

Rarity: 14

Description: Chick-a-Daisy is a strange plant...

Information: Indeed the Chick-a-Daisy is a very, very strange plant. They grow in the driest areas of the Lost Desert, feeding on the most waterless sands. It takes them only twelve hours after being planted to reach their full size. When (although this is an extremely rare occurrence) it rains in the Desert, the Chick-a-Daisy withers and is prone to death, unless appropriate steps are taken to heal it.

    D = Dragonbud

Rarity: 60

Description: Dragonbuds help keep nasty bugs and aphids at bay. It likes nothing better than munching on the troublesome pests.

Information: Dragonbuds are probably the most unique plant. They can both attract a visitor to your garden AND devour them. Dragonbuds are most definitely from Meridell, and are Kastraliss' favourite plant. My one question to the Neopets Team is, "What's a dragon?" I'm pretty sure a Draikbud would be more successful to those younger Neopets.

E = Extra Wild Orchid

Rarity: 87

Description: This is one extremely prickly plant that will grow everywhere if you don’t prune it regularly.

Information: When they say it grows everywhere, they mean it grows everywhere. EVERYWHERE! On your lawn, in your house, on your windowsill, in the kitchen cabinets… The only way to keep it from spreading everywhere is to prevent it from happening in the first place. For example, let’s say you’ve just moved into a nice Neohome in Neopia Central. The grass is fresh and green, the walls are clean and white, and the roof doesn’t leak. That’s when you notice some strange yellow stems amid the grass. Then, after a few more days, you spot the stems closer to your Neohome. Eventually they will get inside your Neohome, unless they are thoroughly pruned from day one.

F = Faerie Bean Plant

Rarity: 86

Description: This unusual plant will keep on growing taller as long as you water it.

Information: These plants are extremely plentiful in Faerieland—especially in Fyora’s splendid garden. Harrises love to climb and sleep on them, especially the unusually tall ones. Assuming that you water it four times a week and de-bean it daily, a Faerie Bean Plant will never stop growing. The tallest one recorded is over six hundred feet tall.

G = Gloomacinth

Rarity: 89

Description: Add a bit of drabness to your colourful garden with some Gloomacinths.

Information: Formerly called Joyacinths, these dreary flowers originated in Terror Mountain. At one point in time they were colourful and full of joy, but eventually, as Terror Mountain’s climate decreased in temperature, they became drab and gloomy. No, they didn’t die, but they turned into half-dead plants; flower zombies. It was then that their current name, Gloomacinth, was assigned to them.

    H = Heart Fruit Tree

Rarity: 101

Description: Add a wonderful chocolate scent to your garden with this fragrant Heart Fruit Tree.

Information: Heart Fruit Trees are a rare species of tree that are only able to grow in Neopia Central, which is quite convenient for many Neopians. They only bloom during the Month of Awakening, which happens to be even more convenient, as that is the month when Valentine’s Day occurs. This makes for the perfect Valentine’s Day gift, although they are rather expensive.

I = Illusens Orb Plant

Rarity: 101

Description: This beautiful plant will make any garden look like a magical paradise.

Information: The description would be true—if Illusen’s Orb Plant was anywhere but Illusen’s Glade! That’s right, this is a one-of-a-kind, exceptionally stylish plant. Illusen created it herself, using the orbs of an Orb Plant as her main ingredient, so naturally it is a direct relative. Rumour has it that there is another “Illusen’s Orb Plant” being created, but we’ll just see what happens, shall we?

K = Kollie Flower

Rarity: 88

Description: A rather unusual cross between a vegetable and a flower. Sure to get your neighbours talking!

Information: Actually, this plant is not uncommon at all. They are very plentiful, especially in the farms of Meridell. They are also very inexpensive and easy to raise. They look nice in your garden, and they taste good! This half-vegetable, half-flower plant is all-purpose in every way!

    L = Lazydels

Rarity: 79

Description: These flowers are so lazy you have to prop them up on sticks to get them to stand up.

Information: Reminds you of a Boadaisy, eh? Although Lazydels, like Boadaisies, need to be propped up with a stick, it is for an entirely different reason. Lazydels are simply lazy, while Boadaisies are flimsy. It is a known fact, however, that the two are very closely related.

M = Meepie Tree

Rarity: 79

Description: A fragrant interesting plant that will bring a sweet smell to any garden.

Information: This plant is indeed interesting. Milky oils full of perfumed bubbles glide through thousands of minute tubes within the tree, creating that magnificent scent. The only person who does not like the aroma created by this plant is Dr. Sloth, and plants don’t grow in outer space, so everyone is happy. :)

N = Negg Muncher

Rarity: 90

Description: This greedy little plant will munch through all your Neggs if you are not careful!

Information: Ah, but he'll also munch through the Neggs! No, wait... Negg Munchers, though stable plants, are very hungry and violent. Don't be afraid to put one in your garden, because they don't eat other plants. When your Neopets cling to you for dear life, you’ll know that it's working perfectly.

    O = Orb Plant

Rarity: 60

Description: Add an interesting feature to your garden. The Orb Plant creates a dazzling light show as it reflects the suns rays.

Information: The interesting part about the Orb Plant is that it doesn't blind any passing Tonu. Orb Plants should not be confused with any other orb that might blow up with water, this orb GROWS with water! Be sure to get one and dazzle your friends.

P = Pebeanjay Flowers

Rarity: 50

Description: Pebeanjays are hardy, all-rounders suitable for gardeners of all abilities.

Information: They make me hungry... Pebeanjays first started growing in Neopia Central. Mr. Ilff, the Food Shop Chia, found them growing in his garden and thought they were weeds. Mr. Ilff then mixed them up with his peanut butter and jelly sandwiches when he was serving customers, and accidentally fed them those. To this day Pebeanjay Flowers are well-known tasty plants.

    R = Rock Tree

Rarity: 60

Description: This tree is great for first time gardeners as it requires virtually no care at all.

Information: Although it hardly requires any effort to take care of, there are two things you must remember to do. It is a necessity to (1) plant the Rock Tree among pebbles, and (2) pick the rocks off of the branches every other week. If you do not pick the rocks, they will grow to be too large and heavy, and the branches will snap off. A Rock Tree’s only food are stones and pebbles.

S = Snake Rose

Rarity: 50

Description: Keep intruders at bay with these spooky looking Snake Roses. They wriggle in the wind and look just like real serpents.

Information: No offense Neopets Team, but shouldn't it be called a Cobrall Rose...? Whether it's that or the Donut Rose, it's still a marvelous sight to see. Many think that Snake Roses are evil Petpets because they squirm so much, and are terrified. I suppose if you gave it to Adam as a gift...

T = Tongue Tree

Rarity: 101

Description: GROSS!!!

Information: I agree with the Neopets Team on this one. The Tongue Tree originates in the Haunted Woods, and although it is gross, it is nothing compared with the Brain Tree. Some say the Brain Tree is the parent of Tongue Trees, and their mother is the Stomach Tree... But those people also collect spoons and juggle grandmothers.

W = Wiltadendhron

Rarity: 65

Description: Plant one near your house and you will soon have pretty tendrils climbing up your walls.

Information: Wiltadendhrons are sturdy and slim, colorful and fruity, and hard to spell! They were first grown in Mystery Island, where the heat got to them and made them wilt. Wiltadendhrons tend to appear sad, but really aren't! They're just tall, happy campers—er, flowers!

Y = Yolkalia

Rarity: 25

Description: This perennial beauty will brighten any garden with its dazzling flame red petals.

Information: The Yolkalia flower is Neggy. Plain and simple Neggy. The inside looks and tastes like a Negg's yolk, and it looks as if it were on fire, which is how you cook a Negg. Veg the Health Nut Quiggle decided to visit Jhuidah’s cooking pot with a Yellow Negg and a Fireball Negg, hoping for a healthy snack for spicy-lovers, which is basically what resulted.

Z = Zobamints

Rarity: 68

Description: Mint so strong, that if you chew on it your teeth will fall out! Very nice in beef stew!

Information: Mint beef stew? No, no. Zobamints are capable of so much more. What's not to like about a Zobamint? It's got a fresh taste, a strong colour, and a nice 8-character name. Being my personal favorite plant, you can say we saved the best for last.

We've given you a list of our favourite plants, but there are oh so many more! But, now it is your turn. Visit the Gardening Supplies Shop in Neopia Central to purchase gardening supplies (duh). Arty the Blumaroo is always willing to help.

Please note that all extra information is just for fun and is not intended for use in book reports, essays, or refrigerators. Neomail either costa_rican_girl or 0523ck with comments, fanmail, or water bottles!

FROM ROSE: Hey all! Thanks for reading the article that Patrick (0523ck) and I wrote! Just so you all know, I wrote letters A through N, and Patrick basically did the rest. I want to thank Patrick for collaborating with me, people at the NTWF (you know who you are!), and everyone who read this article and/or any other of my publications in the Neopian Times. I love getting letters from you, so send ‘em in!


FROM PATRICK: Nothing much to cover, as Rose has said it all. This is my first article, so if you liked it, please let me know!

Search the Neopian Times

Great stories!


Meridell - King Hagan's Lecture
King Skarl is a bad listener...

by void_walker


Fated: Merry Meet Again
Kiliaresetar and Shalaresilv had been the ones to save the world when Sloth threatened to destroy it. The two Kougras were as different as night and day, and yet they were the best of friends...

by jade_steel


It's all his fault. I have no friends at Neoschool, and they're all scared of me. They know I'm Loa's sibling and I'm sick of it. I want friends, and he ruins it for me...

by dragoneyeneo


Hyper Drive
It's bath time!

by jacfreec

Submit your stories, articles, and comics using the new submission form.