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Neopoint EATERS


by tigerfriend1691

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They are vicious.

They are hungry.

They are truly mysterious.

And they EAT your Neopoints!

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, pets and petpets, petpetpets and...er...other petpetpets, YOU are the victims of...

NEOPOINT EATERS.

These evil games are intent on taking your well-earned Neopoints. Why? What have we ever done to the owners of these disgusting games? I don’t know, but I DO know that the Neopoint Eaters steal Neopoints from you…or else they trick you into wasting your NP on your own.

Below, I have listed 10 of the WORST Neopoint Eaters in all of Neopia.*

10. OVERPRICED NEOPETS-RUN SHOPS. Sandals for 270 Neopoints? And they sell for what, 5 simple Neopoints on the Shop Wizard? "I'm only trying to...um...make a living," the infamous Tiki Tack Man says, attempting to pick the pocket of a nearby shopper.

9. COCONUT SHY. Located in the not-so-deserted Deserted Fairground, this game is highly addictive. Every throw costs you 100 Neopoints, and although you have a chance to win 50 NP, 300 NP, or the highly elusive 10,000 NP and special prize, you can lose quite a lot of Neopoints in a very short amount of time. "It's all...family entertainment, you know," the operator of the game wheezes. More like it takes Neopoints away from a happy Neopian family.

8. SHOP OF MYSTERY. This cozy cabin perched atop Terror Mountain looks innocent and fun! But DO NOT be fooled...inside your seemingly wonderful Mystery Package that you spent over 1,500 NP on, there may just be a broken corn pyramid, or perhaps if you are lucky a lowly Neggitus Injection. Tarla (the shopkeeper) seems friendly enough, but her mysterious enticements are not worth the time or money.

7. CONCERTS. Woo-hoo! Let's all go spend 1,250 Neopoints to go hear an old loop and win a T-shirt or maybe a lovely hat! Fun! Sure, there's always the chance that you could win an ultra-rare speaker or some other obscure and fabulous prize, but usually you just end up being ripped off. "So we're cheating the citizens, what's the big deal?" the Tyrannian ticket seller asks with some indignation in his voice. Well, at least they admit it.

6. PICK YOUR OWN. I don't know about you, but I've never gotten anything better than a Mortogberry for my 400 NP in this scam, located on the Meri Acres Farms in Meridell. It's a good bit of fun, especially as that good country air is nice and fresh, but if you're looking to save up your money, this is most definitely NOT the place for you. When asked if he considered his activity to be a swindle, the old farmer said resolutely, "Aye." (There is some question as to whether or not this is the farmer's only vocabulary word. Hmmm.)

5. WHEEL OF KNOWLEDGE. It's shiny, sparkly, and so much fun when you win a rare Brightvale Job Coupon. But it’s not so enjoyable when you win a Brightvale Berry. The Draik who runs it is friendly and funny...but one lousy spin of this fancy wheel is going to cost you 500 Neopoints. And hearing some old rubbishy "wisdom" from King Hagan is definitely not worth it. Oh no...here comes his army...I think that they are rather angry about my insults at their king....oh good, they missed me. ANYWAYS, if you're looking for a real game of chance, this is it. And while you’re at it, go bet 10,000** on the Poogle Races, too.

4. BAGATELLE. 250 NP for this old geezer to chuck a Mootix! And the most I've ever won from this scam is 50 NP, and believe me, I’ve tried to win! You'd think that we'd all have the good sense not to play, but here's the secret: the owner of the Bagatelle brainwashes you into playing over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and...whooooooops I just ran out of Neopoints.

3. LEVER OF DOOM. The name doesn't lie, folks! Don't pull this lever, unless of course you think it's jolly good fun to have your own lovely Neopoints viciously stolen from you. Unfortunately, natural curiosity draws our hands (or paws) to this shiny lever, so there goes our money.

2. FAERIE QUESTS. So the Fire Faerie comes to you asking for some clothes. And you know it's cheap, but you can't use the Shop Wizard! Alas! You must go manually search for some shop that sells your item, but it sells for 5000 NP over the Shop Wizard Average. So you buy it and the Fire Faerie says, "Omigosh THANK YOU now here you go have a nice little hit point." Yay.

1. SCRATCHCARDS. Personally, I love scratchcards. The glory, the excitement, the slim chance of winning....yes, the SLIM chance of winning. Spend 600 NP to win snowballs! OR perhaps you'd like to spend 1000 for a scratchcard that doesn't work. Yes, there are some fabulous prizes (jackpots, rare items, avatars, etc.) but it can take a long time--and a lot of np--to win a decent prize. Plus there is the bothersome fact that the scratchcard merchants go on break, which means you have to spend extra for a scratchcard from a user shop.

*The 10 Neopoint Eaters listed above are in no particular order.

**You are not allowed to be more than 300 NP on the Poogle races at one time. This was simply a comparison used to enhance the point I was trying to make.

Well, I hope that my article has enlightened you to the dangers of the Neopoint Eaters in Neopia. I wish to tell you that I sympathize with all of you Neopians out there who have lost fortunes from these “fun games.” Don’t be fooled into playing these games on your own! Well, actually, I can't stop you from *ahem* WASTING your well-earned Neopoints on these silly games, but I CAN warn you that with just a few simple clicks, your Neopian fortune can morph into ruins.

Thank you.

 
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