Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 110,063,363 Issue: 180 | 4th day of Running, Y7
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Boycott the Tongue Shrinkers!


by kikik312

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ALL ACROSS NEOPIA - The number one cause of the twisted tongues (can also result in the disease ‘Floppy Tongue’) throughout Neopia is more than just menacing. They are nightmares for everyone in Neopia. These villainous ‘THINGS’ may appear harmless, but they are NOTHING of the sort.

Today I’m here to tell you why you have been spending so many Neopoints buying Tongue Shrinker injections, and how you are never going to have to buy them again. You are going to save the tongues of you and your pets by avoiding these evil words. Below is my rating scale of the danger of saying these tongue twisting words of Neopia:

Thy Tongue Twisty Rating Scaleo Thingamabobbyerry(Don't even try that one it's a 12)

1 = It is a tongue twister but not a threat at all. It probably looks bad but isn't. Like the word Adam. Adam. Amdas. Oh, never mind.

2 = It is a little more dangerous than 1, but there is not much danger; unless you say it more than 100 times.

3 = It's getting to these words that just bug you now... Like Slorg might end up being slurg...

4 = We’re getting into red Slorgs now…

5 = Now it’s Plushie Slorgs (I am NOT running out of ideas, I will NEVER run out of ideas... Get it!?)

6 = Slimesicle. Slimesicle. Slimewisckle. Forget it! Geez!

7 = Oh no, Babaas!!! Ahh help!! It's Babasas. Urg!!!!!

8 = Destruct-o-match coo?

9 = These are like trying to pronounce Hannah and the ice caves in Latin backwards....

10 = This one is like Hannah and Armin in the ice caves in Latin forwards then backwards!

Now that we have covered the rating's scale, let us begin with the regular everyday (or unexpected) tongue twisters. Beware these villainous horrors are sneaky and will creep up and surprise you throughout your everyday life!

1. Blue Draik Egg-1/10

2. Halloween Rock-1/10(I really just wanted to give the rocks some attention for once in its poor history in Neopia)

3. Dr_Death Plushie-1/10

4. Neopian Times Issue 3-1/10

5. Hot Dog and Fizzy Drink-2/10

6. Rainbow Warf-2/10

7. Slorg- 3/10

8. Geb Gajillionare- 3/10

9. Red Slorg- 4/10

10. Golden Jelly Window- 4/10

11. The Game Graveyard- 4/10

12. Devil Chia Plushie- 4/10

13. Plushie Slorg- 5/10 (I'm NOT low on ideas okay, now quit bugging me, and Greg the Very Angry Programmer give me back my Negg Nog!)

14. Blue Slorg Calculator- 5/10

15. Angel Chia Plushie- 5/10

16. Alien Aisha Vending Machine- 6/10

17. Anubis Arm Chair- 6/10

18. Race to Riches scratch card- 6/10

19. Jelly Chia Plushie- 6/10

20. Babaabackpack- 7/10

21. White Weewoos- 7/10

22. Punchbag Bob Plushie- 8/10

23. Babaa Bobble Hat- 8/10

24. Greg the Very Angry Programmer(You have been bad Greg!)- 8/10

26. Destructomatch II- 8/10

27. Silver Brightvale Job coupon- 8/10

28. Piece of Laboratory Map- 9/10

29. Sloth Day Soup- 10/10

30. Beanbagchairfish-10/10

Now that we have covered those lesser known and unexpected tongues twisters, here are some tongue twisters purposely made for the twisting of tongues! Do these at your own risk, remember these are the biggest twisters of all, made by professional troublemakers, such as Adam and Greg!(*waves finger at Greg* Naughty.. Naughty...)

1. Adam is a very evil Neopian. (2/10) (I know there should be fifty very's there, but don't make this any harder on me than it already is! Or on yourself, okay Greg! What's with these Programers today..)

2. Big bad Blumaroos bounced over boxes of berries and borovan while being written 'bout in a big bad Neopian Times Article 'bout tongue twisters. (6/10)

3. Chias can count coins quicker than Chombies can chew chocolate. (7/10)

4. The Devil Chia danced a dance at dawn. (7/10)

5. The Negg Faerie never knew neggs were not eaten by Noils. (Noils are allergic to Neggs. And I'm allergic to lies I tell. *Swells up* Oops.)(7/10)

6. Asparagus always ambles away after Adam gets hungry and asks to eat the awesome vegetable. (8/10)

7. Tony the tongue twisting Tonu took Terry the Tuskaninny to Tyrannia last Tuesday. (8/10)

8. The Lupe loved licking lemons and limes lovingly. (8/10)

9. Willy the wacky Wocky walked with a wok while walking on his front Wocky paws. (9/10)

10. The sad Snicklebeast snickered as silently as the sad Snicklebeast could. (9/10)

11. The blue Babaa bought his blue Babaa friend a big Babaa bobble hat from the bazaar! (9/10)

12. The Chomby chewed the cherries quickly and cheerfully. (9/10)

13. The pink Pinklet pilfered my pink and purple plushies! (10/10)

14. The angry Acara ambled away after acting out Vera at an awesome Acara acting audition! (10/10)

15. Floppy tongue terrifies and troubles five thousand to ten thousand Neopians as this man writes a tongue twister that causes a floppy tongue epidemic worse then the word Magesticaliosis which doesn't even exist ever even in extraordinary dreams of dung! Weewoos run from the Wockies and this is an extremely pointless tongue twister indeed! (13/10)

So there you have it all of you readers of this annoying article (that is missing a few words until I get to the minimum), all the biggest threats to your tongue, as well as your Neopets' tongue. Heed my warning and beware, there are more than just these tongue twisters in Neopia; more tricky twisters lurk in the dark corners and shadows of Neopian vocabulary, waiting... So many, that it even terrifies the Meepits and Weewoos! But for the time being, I must leave you all for my own reasons. Why? Well, while writing this article, my pets and I have come down with a horribly bad case of Floppy Tongue from saying all those tongue twisters, and I’m off to buy several Tongue Shrinker injections. Buh enzeewey, alveys

Mehmember, a ung wister es a enace oh oiety, an a airentee or a enamemic o appy unge.

*Editor's translation* “But anyways, always remember a tongue twister is a menace to

society and a guarantee for an epidemic of floppy tongue”

(This is my first article ever. I'd like to give a shoutout here, since I couldn't fit it on the authors note. Thank you: _itnic_, NTAG guild, pharmacy(for the tongue shrinkers), and everyone else I know in Neopia. Without you, this article would not have been possible nor would it have been the same.. By the way, when will the TNT release Negg Nog as an item? I'm waiting! Greg QUIT stalling!!!)

 
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