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A Tribute To Lawyerbot


by brodysseus

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Every day, thousands of Neopians wander through the world playing games, chatting with friends, trading items, and so much more. The world exists in unity, except for Dr. Sloth. The efficiency in this world comes from a strict, but reasonable, set of rules that we all follow. A promise to each other that we won't scam, that we won't steal, and that we won't cheat. But there are a few rogue Neopians out there who do decide to break the rules, who want to take advantage of players and steal their items, who do bad things to earn things unfairly. But these people don't get away, because there is always someone lurking in the shadows to catch them in their terrible acts and deliver them a subpoena, to dole out their punishment and make them serve their time. That person is Lawyerbot. And this article is dedicated to him and all the cool items you can obtain to celebrate him!

Lawyerbot is the one who keeps a close eye on Neopia to make sure all things are running smoothly, from the users on the Neoboards to the programmers creating content. He is the one who freezes accounts, negotiates the rules of new games, and collects Usuki dolls. That's right, Lawyerbot has a soft side and he loves Usukis! In fact, if you go to his gallery you'll see a wide assortment of the types of items he likes to collect, with a large portion being those highly styled Usul-like dolls. He also loves robots, freezing items, and Dr. Sloth's officially licensed merchandise. You'll notice when you read the description to the gallery that he actually has a side gig working FOR Dr. Sloth in all matters of branding and licensing on Sloth merchandise. Rest easy however, Lawyerbot has not sold out his morals to Sloth and still acts in the best interests of Neopians.

Along with his soft spot for Usuki dolls, he likes to spend his free time writing poetry. In fact, his poetry is so special that it has it's own special page where you can go read it!

So after you've read a bit of his poetry and poked through his gallery, you too may be as big of a fan as I am. So what can you do about it? Well, first you can go out and earn the Lawyerbot Heart Usuki avatar by holding 50 unique 'usuki' items in your inventory.

Then once your avatar is set, you can hit the Trading Post or Shop Wizard to find the following Lawyerbot themed items!!

Lawyerbot Self-Portrait

A beautiful portrait of Lawyerbot with a giant grin on his face. It even comes with it's on self-supporting frame and stand so you can pop it on your bed side table, above your fireplace, or in your kitchen! Seeing his smile and his purple tie will bring a smile to your face every time you look at it.

Lawyerbot Head, Lawyerbot Top and Lawyerbot Trousers

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, and with these three Neocash exclusive items you can imitate the way Lawyerbot looks! Cover your Neopet with bulky pieces of armor and you're sure to be afraid of being reprimanded by your own pet! The resemblance is uncanny.

Lawyerbot Briefcase

Your Lawyerbot outfit won't even be close to complete without this 1337 briefcase. No one really knows exactly what he carries around, I can only imagine it's full of very important documents and subpoenas though.

Holiday Lawyerbot Plushie

Want to tone it down from a full body suit and get a bit festive? The Holiday Lawyerbot Plushie features a knit hat and sweater that is seasonally appropriate for the winter. This makes a great gift around the holidays for any Lawyerbot-lover in your life. Or someone you'd like to scare a bit if they've been naughty!

Strange Metal Usuki

Due to some weird brand and liscensing laws, this Usuki strongly resembles Lawyerbot...but doesn't share a name. I'm not quite sure why, but this Usuki is definitely modeled after the great Usuki collector himself, Lawyerbot. It's especially apparent when you take a look at that briefcase!

Usuki Lawyerbot Play Set

On the bright side, those licensing issues seemed to be resolved eventually and the factory that makes Usuki dolls released this play set. It comes with all the pieces, including a bow tie, to dress up your Usuki. It's packed in it's own little briefcase as well, the attention to detail is impeccable!

Lawyerbot Degreaser

Life isn't easy for a robot, your gears can get creaky and you have to keep everything running smoothly. Lawyerbot put out his own line of patented degreaser for robot Neopets to use. If it's good enough for the most notorious robot in all of Neopia, it's good enough for your pet! Just be careful, it's not very cheap and you don't want to spill a drop!

Lawyerbots Number One Fan Background

Claim your throne as the top Lawyerbot fan in the world with this background. It's actually a bit scary really. The walls are grey to match the tone of Lawyerbot's shell, and the walls are quite literally lined with tiny Lawyerbots. As if that wasn't enough, the lamp, desk, trash bin, and everything else has Lawyerbot's face on it. Many would find this background to be too much, but for others it is exactly what they've been looking for. I just wouldn't recommend having this be your bedroom, you might be too scared to sleep. All eyes are truly on you.

But these aren't the only items out there to show your appreciation for this lawyer that keeps us all safe and sound in Neopia. There are many others that you'll find if you hunt around. Just be careful while you're hunting, you would not want to stumble into dark territory that could get you in trouble. Lawyerbot does his best to keep us all safe, and to keep everything around the site fair, but he also warns us that some things cannot be protected against and he tries to educate us on how we can keep ourselves safe when he's not around. If you need a refresher on all these tips, head over to the Neopets Safety Tips page and learn a bit more about the common scams that might take place and how to protect yourself. Safe browsing everyone!

 
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