White Weewoos don't exist. *shifty eyes* Circulation: 194,363,486 Issue: 762 | 23rd day of Celebrating, Y18
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I’ve Had A Very Merry Christmas


by blackroseofwisdom

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      Happy holidays! Snow is falling, bells are jingling, and cheerful people are on every Neopian street corner. I’m Doriwen the Christmas Draik and let me tell you how this holiday season has gone so far. I don’t think I have ever received so many gifts. I must have been a really good Draik! I was gifted several amazing wearables. Shirts, socks, gloves, pajamas, and even a hat, just to name a few! There were even different accessories to go with them. I’m such a lucky pet. I’ve had a very Merry Christmas.

    Well the shirts were swell...

The first things I received this year were plenty of shirts. They were really swell! I believe everyone needs at least five holiday Mystery Island shirts in their closet. I even had one already in the back of my closet from the Advent Calendar a few years ago. Maybe my owner really enjoys dressing me in red. I’ve had a very Merry Christmas.

    And the socks were fine, all size twelve but my feet are size nine. The slippers gap.

Then there were some really fine socks. Cozy holiday socks, Snow Wurm socks, and even some really nifty woolen socks to keep my feet warm. I wish I could wear them! They’re all size twelve but my feet are size nine. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but the Fuzzy Pink Ruki Slippers gap. I’m not even a Ruki, anyway! But I’ve had a very Merry Christmas.

    You know, the watch can't run and the music box won’t sing.

I got a nice sundial wristwatch that fits really well. Too bad I’m stuck inside so it can’t tell the time. And the cutest blue Kadoatie music box, it’s even supposed to play my favorite tune! Oh, but it’s so greedy, it has to be fed to play. I fed it once and then it started to cry! I’ve had a very Merry Christmas.

    The gloves are small, the hat’s too tight, and the pajamas don't fit.

I wish I could say the same about the gloves I opened next. The Knit Gloves that were supposed to keep my hands warm this holiday season were too small. And I received the most perfect homemade Christmas Draik hat, too bad it is too tight and the stitches split. I even received a lovely lacy Poogle sleeping gown. Too bad the pajamas don’t fit since I’m not a Poogle! But I’ve had a very Merry Christmas!

    Ten dozen hankies! My owner must think that I'm covered with noses.

Then I opened a box of colorful hankies. It was such a thoughtful gift, ten dozen hankies! Too bad they’re all tied together. What does my owner think I am? A magician? At least I can use them to blow my nose again and again and again. I’ve had a very Merry Christmas!

    Six codestones, they're all handmade. They're lovely stones, but they're all the same kind.

I am very grateful for my family, I just wish my siblings had talked about gifts! They all gave me homemade main codestones, I can't even use them! It was such a mistake to mention my New Year’s resolution was to start training. The Mystery Island Training Academy would never accept homemade codestones. I guess I could make myself a codestone lei to wear. Oh, I’ve had a very Merry Christmas!

    'Cause the pencil won't write and the camera won't snap.

Then I was so excited to open my new blue Draik pencil; blue has always been my favorite color. But when I picked it up to write this story, it snapped right in half! I also received a really nice old fashioned camera. It was practically an antique! I wanted to take a photograph of all my presents to show how grateful I was, but I couldn’t get it to work! And there wasn’t even an instruction manual. How does that old thing work, anyway?! But I’ve had a very Merry Christmas!

    The coffee was much too strong.

Flavour-changing coffee! Now that’s a gift a Draik can enjoy. Now, other neopets may fear the change, but let me assure you, it’s just fine, and tasted great. Oh, but it was much too strong! One sip and I was up for days. My owner had to hide my coffee cup. Now how will I get to experience the other flavors? What a joke. A fine gift and I can’t even enjoy it. I’ve had a very Merry Christmas.

    The sweater's wide, the shorts are long, and the bathrobe's too tight.

Then I opened up boxes with even more clothes! I even got an ugly gorgeous Christmas sweater (thanks, Aunt Mildred!) Sadly, it was too wide for me to wear! I tried on my Wheelers wild shorts. I tripped when I stood up because they are much too long! The Fancy Plush Bathrobe is much too tight. It would have been the perfect thing to wear when I check the news each night. I’ve had a very Merry Christmas.

    I got six pairs of petpets, a present that my owner gave.

Six pairs of petpets! She must think that I'm Taelia the Snow Faerie! I was so excited to see the boxes under the Christmas Tree. I just knew my owner would get me the best present of all, she knows me so well! Then I opened it up to find six pairs of snowbunnies, all in different colors! I guess next year I can tell a story about The Twelve Snowbunnies of Christmas. I've had a very Merry Christmas.

    And the ring ain't gold, the wings are tin, and I caught a good cold.

Next I found a beautiful golden ring! But it isn't even real gold, so now my finger’s green. What a way to show someone you care, ha! My jeweled silver wings lost all their jewels. It may say silver but I think they’re really made of tin. The only breathtaking part about them is how quickly they fell apart! And to make it even better, now it seems like I've caught a good cold. So much for going outside to play with my sundial watch. But at least I have ten dozen hankies! Too bad my owner couldn’t have made me some Morthog serum. But I’ve had a very Merry Christmas.

    Jingle bells, jingle bells give my heart a lift. Tomorrow I'll be on my way exchanging every gift.

I've had a very Merry Christmas, but maybe I’m just a little bit disappointed. Yeah, a fine Christmas I had. Ah, don't get me wrong, though. I'm not too unhappy. I'm just miserable. But everything will be brighter tomorrow. First a quick stop at the Healing Springs to get rid of this nasty cough, then I can exchange all the gifts. I've had my eye on those elegant Draik slippers in the window down at the trading post. I bet I can trade in those socks and fuzzy pink Ruki slippers to get them! Then the ugly Christmas sweater and Wheeler’s wild shorts need to go. I’m sure I can exchange them for a new holiday outfit to wear to all the parties this year. But just wait till next year. Next year will be different, I just know it will. It has to be- Achoo! Oh, where are my hankies?

The End.

 
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