The Life and Times of the Money Tree
NEOPIA CENTRAL - We’ve all heard about the legendary Money Tree. The glorious
tree from whose boughs hang treasures for less fortunate Neopians. A spectacle
of ultimate kindness in Neopia Central, humbling us all and bringing us back to
what is important. If you haven’t heard of the Money Tree, or grown to marvel
at it, you must have had you head stuck in the ground for the past few years.
Or you could have been trampled by a pack of wild Moehog’s. Only for that reason
will I accept your absence of knowledge.
But when you come to think about it, it’s not the Money Tree itself that provides
the free goods and Neopoints, but Neopians like you and I. So really, the Money
Tree has nothing to do with it at all. It’s just a landmark. A meeting point.
In all honesty, as kind as we are when we donate goods and Neopoints for the
needy, it’s the presence Money Tree that drives us to do these things. Think
about it. If the Money Tree wasn’t there, where would we go to donate? The majority
of us are far too busy with our own plans of world dominat- erm…far too busy
with our own plans to go out of our way to donate. But as we rush too and from
the many attractions in Neopia Central, no doubt we’ll pass the Money Tree at
some point during the day. And it is the simplicity of merely stopping to drop
off an unwanted item, or just dig out a few Neopoints, that compels us to donate.
So, now we know why it’s there. But do we truly appreciate the Money Tree?
All day and night long it stays in position, guarding its gifts, fending off
greedy people, watching the happenings of its surroundings, and constantly being
bombarded with appearances from those pesky wandering ghosts. It is no mere
Life is unimaginable for the Money Tree. Not necessarily in a bad way, just
different from anything we could possibly experience.
What’s that I hear you ask? How? Fear not, I have the answers!
Enough with the sentimental chapter. I think it’s time to hear about the brighter
side of the Money Tree’s life! The things it has experienced are countless,
but if you really want to know, I’ll get you up to date on the life and times
of the Money Tree!
Day after day after day the Money Tree sits and watches the comings and goings
of its visitors. No doubt it’s seen some quirky characters in its lifetime.
Sadly, when I tried to question it about this, it refused to talk to me and
sent me away. I have no idea why, but I’ve narrowed it down to two reasons:
a) It doesn’t like talking to people, or b) It does like talking to people,
just not ones that reek of dung because they’ve spent the morning picking berries.
Totally discriminatory if you ask me, but it happens. *sigh* Anyway, to make
sure I guaranteed my readers a full view on the life and times of the Money
Tree, I decided to set up camp behind a cleverly disguised rock (which was disguised
as a rock, funnily enough) and observe. After a full days worth of observing,
I noted many strange visitors. Two of them stood out particularly. One was a
tall, hulking figure that was carrying two white boxes. Strangely, he only donated
one, before loping away, muttering excitedly about “revenge” and “victory”.
I have no idea what he was on about.
What's that you say? Doctor Sloth?! No, no, of course it wasn’t. Don’t be ridiculous.
Erm…if a mysterious white box turns up at your Neohome, I would suggest not
opening it. Just as a precaution. *clears throat*
The second slightly odd visitor was quite a sight. The first thing I noticed
was the deep, gravely voice. I peeked out from my rock-disguised-as-a-rock,
expecting to see a mutant Neopet, or maybe even a ghost. But no, it was just
a pink Lupe. Quite contrary, if you ask me. :)
The Money Tree is lucky enough to witness daily the joy on people’s faces as
they pick a donation. It’s no wonder it’s always smiling! Imagine how great
it must be to be a place of happiness for so many Neopians. However, not all
of the Money Tree’s time is sunshine and daisies. Every now and then, those
awful ghosts turn up to wreck havoc. Either they come with stolen goods to “donate”
(because they’re “so kind”, they insist), or they snatch treasures from the
Money Tree itself, before zooming away, cackling. Most people wouldn’t stand
for that, and probably wouldn’t last a week. But once again, the Money Tree
outlasts us all and deals with it. Pretty impressive, huh?
Few people know about this, but the Money Tree is distantly related to the
Brain Tree. They could possibly be bark-related, but I think it was through
marriage. Something like the Money Tree’s mother’s cousin’s uncle married the
Brain Tree’s great aunt’s daughter. Sounds slightly confusing. Well, the ancestral
book was written in Tree. I think it loses something in the translation.
Right next to the Money Tree, in a nice little patch of grass, is the Rainbow
Pool. When the Money Tree isn’t busy guarding donations or smiling pleasantly
at a cautious little Ixi, it watches the transformations of drab looking Neopets
to anything from a pirate to a faerie. In fact, the Money Tree enjoys watching
this so much it often booms out greetings to newly painted pets. Beware though,
the tree does speak it’s mind, so if you’ve painted your neopet something unusual,
such as snot, be prepared to be showered with, to put it politely, “helpful
suggestions”. Don’t take it too personally. I myself quite like snot. *snigger*
All in all, the Money Tree leads a charmed life. It gets visited by hundreds
of Neopians daily, so there's never any loneliness or feelings of abandonment.
There's always something happening, and things to see. Sure, it may be planted
firmly into the ground, but with a life like that, who’d want to move?