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Conveniently Placed Shops of Neopia Central

by _chopin


When a Neopian land is being filled with shops, a lot of time and effort goes into their placement. It wouldn't make sense, for instance, to place a shop full of scary items next to one that sells Usukis.

Those who created Neopia Central paid very careful attention to detail, and a few of their choices have paid off quite well. This article is going to explain the top six placements within the shops of Neopia Central. My hopes are that the future architects will read this and take notes.

1. The Hospital and Defenders HQ

If you ask any proper Defender of Neopia if their job is dangerous, odds are they'll say yes. This is for two reasons: Because their job IS dangerous and because they want to appear tough and super-awesome. Luckily, when the shops of Neopia Central were being built, the architects thought hard about what building would complement the HQ. They didn't want the Chocolate Factory because they needed their heroes to stay in shape. They decided against Unis Clothing in case one of their fearsome warriors came dressed in a flowery mask to the job. They even considered the Collectible Card shop, until they realized their employees would be trading their cards rather than fighting evil.

The only place that made sense was the Hospital. With an extremely high probability of injury while on the job, the HQ required nearby medical supplies. It also provides an influx of information on the various ailments heroes tend to meet while in battle. Unfortunately, it seems the most common cure the hospital provides for the HQ is the Step Out Shoes, and understandably so. Any job where you need to fight a snot-covered Meerca is sure to cause fear in even the bravest Neopia has to offer.

2. The Pharmacy and Magic Shop

Kauvara's lucky to have her shop located among the other main shops. This ensures that she has a desirable amount of customers, and therefore sells all of her stock. This location doesn't just benefit her, though. Seated right next to the quirky shop lies the Neopian Pharmacy. Their adjacent positioning was not accidental.

When Kauvara's shop first came to be, there were a lot of people experimenting with her magical items. One of the most popular, at first, was the Slippery Floor Potion. Neopians were delighted at their ability to now adequately prank their neighbors. Once their neighbors slipped and fell due to the uber-hilarious scheme, they'd need medical attention promptly. Fortunately, the Pharmacy was right next to the shop! Not only did this help out those who were intentionally harmed by the magic, it was also convenient for those who were present during accidents in the shop itself. It's not uncommon for someone to spill a potion when browsing the shelves.

3. Huberts Hot Dogs, Fresh Smoothies and Unis Clothing

Let's face it, when stuffing your face with one of Hubert's hot dogs or slurping on a refreshing smoothie, you aren't always careful. There's always a portion of ketchup or mustard that will land on your I Love Turtums T-Shirt, or a slushie dropped in your lap as the result of a painful brain freeze. These two shops were placed together to provide a drink as well as a meal item for Neopians without having to walk very far. Also planned was the positioning of Unis Clothing.

The staff at Unis Clothing are more than accustomed to cleaning up messy customers. If your Eyrie Sweater is littered with remnants from the Brain Hot Dog you just consumed, rather than walk around looking like a zombie (or a disguised Mutant Kacheek) you should simply change your outfit. If you can't afford a new shirt, Novelty Glasses are more than likely in your price range and will at least disguise your sloppy identity temporarily.

4. Plushie Palace and Alien Vending Machine

If you've ever walked by the Plushie Palace, you'd immediately take note of the giant Rainbow Aisha plushie looming over you as you walked past. Recently, those who frequent the Alien Vending Machine have noticed a startling connection. It's a well-known fact that only Aishas can be aliens. It's even more well-known that the Aishas that run the Vending Machine ARE aliens. What isn't well-known is that the aliens and that Rainbow Aisha plushie work together.

The alien Aishas at the Vending Machine don't like to leave their spot. Therefore, they need a way to lure in nerkmid-users to their humble abode. Every time a random event gives away a nerkmid, it's because of that Rainbow Aisha. Those passing the Plushie Palace complain of head injuries on occasion due to falling nerkmids. These nerkmids aren't falling, though. The aliens store nerkmid supplies within that Rainbow Aisha as a way of monitoring just what people do once they obtain one. Do they use it, sell it, or hoard it? The aliens have a use for this knowledge, surely. I don't know what it is, but it's probably creepy.

This sounds like a crazy conspiracy theory? Well, maybe.

5. Kadoatery and Wishing Well

I bet if every Kadoatie in the Kadoatery was offered wishes at the neighboring Wishing Well, they'd all say the same thing: freedom. Yes, that's a sad notion, but it's an honest one. Since their escape is prevented, the most Neopians can do is feed them their desired foods to bring a smile to their adorable faces. Some of these foods, however, are hard to come by. That's where the well comes in.

Kad-lovers and avatar hunters alike want those items. In a fit of hysterics when they realize they lack the proper item, they often run to the well and beg for the food of choice. Unfortunately, by the time the well reacts to their wish, the Kadoatie has most likely been fed by another. Wishful thinking, newbie kadoatie-feeder, and better luck next time. Just a helpful hint, try and wish in advance.

6. Auction House and Bank

Finally, the most alarmingly obvious placement of them all, the Auction House and the Bank. If you notice that in less than two hours an incredibly under-priced Draik Egg is about to leave the Auction House, you'd better run over to that Bank and empty your account. Our Skeith friend at the bank does not appreciate you doing this numerous times throughout the day, though, so it's probably best to keep your hopeful auction sniping to a minimum.

Since the odds of winning the item are low, our bank telling, well-dressed, Green Skeith friend will smile smugly and take your neopoints back. Sometimes, it almost seems like he enjoys it.

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