Now with 50% more useless text Circulation: 185,576,530 Issue: 499 | 17th day of Relaxing, Y13
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Be a Good Sport - When You're Bad at Sports


by mheetu

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Well, it’s that time of year again. It’s the time of Yooyus, slushies and Jelly Chias. The familiar unnamed Blue Techo has come out of hibernation - it takes a lot of energy to be such a big fan. Why, I’m talking about the Altador Cup, of course!

You may have picked up a sling and practiced for a while only to remember why you didn’t participate in the Altador Cup last year - you’re terrible at Yooyuball. I’m talking Brightvale in the Altador Cup IV terrible. Even if you want to join a team and help them win, you’d feel like you were holding them back, and more importantly, wasting your time on the game. What are you to do?

First of all, take note that Yooyuball’s gameplay has been changed up a bit since previous years. Instead of playing with a mouse, you play with the keyboard, using your arrow keys or WASD keys to move your team members and your spacebar for shooting and stealing. Even if you weren’t star-player material before, make sure you at least try the new arrangement (if you haven’t already). You may find the game slightly easier. You can also try out the different formations: three offenders, three defenders, or two and two. If you’re having trouble getting to the Yooyu before the other team, I’d recommend either three offenders or one offender, as each of those formations positions one of your team members in the middle, giving you a straight line heading directly to the petpet. You can also play in two different directions, right to left and left to right. Test them both out. Who knows? Maybe that’s all you needed to help you get in the game.

After trying everything out, you may be thinking: “Thanks a lot, Neopian Times Journalist, you just re-affirmed my knowledge that I’m TERRIBLE at Yooyuball. That’s done WONDERS for my self-esteem.” Don’t worry, I have more tricks up my sleeve.

Remember, Yooyuball isn’t the only part of the Altador Cup. There are three mini-games that teams also compete in. For example, there’s Make Some Noise, where you play the aforementioned Techo and tap two keys as quickly as you can, screaming your heart out as the ultimate fan. There’s also Shootout Showdown, in which you can shoot a Yooyu past a Jelly Chia goalie. And let’s not forget about the behind-the-scenes game: Slushie Slinger, where you feed slushies to all the hungry, impatient fans. Chances are, you’re good at one of those games, so you can bring your team to victory in a different way. Try playing each one at least once.

Even if you’re hardly a gamer (or are just plain stubborn and refuse to make money that way), you can still participate in the Altador Cup by supporting your favourite team. On the boards, you can change your NeoTitle (the little slogan shown below your avatar) to reflect your team. As a bonus, you can use an avatar obtained in that land, such as the IOM Moehog avatar for Meridell or the Hissi - Ice avatar for Terror Mountain. You can even flaunt your team in your signature. Your user lookup is a great place to show off your team too. There are several great premades out there, especially this time of year, or you can make your own. Use some images of your team members and your team’s colors. If you have it, you can also activate the Altador Cup site theme for browsing.

Your pets can get in on the action too. There are tons of wearables specific to each team that you can wear. There are two different kinds of backgrounds, Altador Cup frames, fan jerseys, and NC jerseys, flags and cuffs, as well as general AC paraphernalia such as shoes, bows, sunglasses and other accessories. There’s also the ever-famous Altador Cup Collectors Jacket, and although it costs a pretty penny, it’ll prove you’re a true fan. You can also pick up the NC VIP Pass which can get you tons of brand-new items.

To keep your pets in spirit, you can get them some other AC-themed swagger. You can read them books like “A Fans Guide to the Altador Cup” or your favourite team’s Altador Cup Media Book. Read up on your history with “Altador Cup Through the Ages”, too. Done reading for the day? Snatch up a team Snowglobe or Flying Disc. Celebrate with the famous Techo’s very own bobblehead, or snuggle up with a Snow Yooyu Plushie or Altador Cup Referee Plushie. Play with a Clockwork Yooyu, if you can afford it, but be careful to pass it into a goal quickly so it doesn’t explode. You can even get your pets their very own Altador Cup! Or, if you really want to, you can buy them the star of Altador Cup - a Yooyu! They come in many colors: Snow, Darigan, Fire, Green, Blue, Red, Yellow, and traditional Brown. I suggest naming it after your team’s captain. ;)

So far, we’ve played some games, dressed up our pets and accounts, and gotten in the mood with all sorts of themed items. There are still other things you can do to get in the spirit. How about completing the Altador mini-plot? If you haven’t done it already, it’s a great way to get some free items and a shiny new trophy for your lookup. You can begin by visiting the Hall of Heroes in Altador. If you have done it (and you don’t already have the Altador Cup theme active), you can activate your Altadorian Constellations theme for browsing around the site – it’s the next best thing to the cup theme.

Of course, you may be on the complete opposite side of things: you despise the Altador Cup. All the screaming fanatics, team rivalries, and what is with those petpets running amuck? It can be a little hard to ignore. If you want to, you could hide away until it’s retreated for the year, but you refuse to let the fans drive you away. I’d try some other sports like Mynci Beach Volleyball so you can enjoy the sun and get active. Stay away from the boards and stow or sell all your Altador items. Don’t worry – the Altador Cup doesn’t last forever!

 
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