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Interview with Jhudora


by jeran_b

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Hello, ladies and gentlepets. This is Jerry Whitearrow reporting for the local band SLEUTH, interviews. First of all, I’m the guitarist and lead singer, just so you know. Second, I’m here today to interview none other than Jhudora the dark faerie.

Yes, that’s right. I know. Even though I decided I'd never interview grumpy people again after our disaster with Sophie, I couldn't help but grab my next chance to do it with Jhudora.

As soon as I had decided to interview Jhudora, everyone seemed to have started to question my sanity, but I had discovered from past experiences that people like Sophie and Jhudora were the most interesting.

So, I got my crew together and we started for Faerieland. Along with a crabby sorceress, Roberta, and my annoying little brother, Reggie, I’m bringing my best friend and cousin Ghostwheel; so today we’ll be a foursome.

I couldn’t make any contact with Jhudora and make an appointment, so we traveled to Jhudora’s Bluff uninvited, hoping she wouldn’t mind us dropping by. This time, I made sure to wear a full suit of armor (helm kept in my Uni’s saddle) and bring a sword and shield just in case Jhudora got angry with us (which was very likely) and Roberta chickened out too much to defend us (also very likely).

We arrived in the fallen Faerieland long after dark, the destruction Xandra left made it hard to find Jhudora’s Bluff, but we finally did. Good thing Roberta brought Solarin along, or we wouldn’t have found a way to get up there.

We snuck past a guard and entered Jhudora’s... throne room? Is that what you would call it? It was clean, but there wasn’t a lot of light, which made it hard to see. A purple mist hid most of the furniture, and in the back of the room sat...

Jhudora: Who goes there? Oh. More pitiful neopets. Do you want a quest?

Me: Maybe later, m’lady. I was wondering if I could interview you.

Jhudora: Interview? Hmm... Okay.

Me: Great! *Pulls out messy stack of papers* ... Now where is that paper...?

Ghostwheel: Jhudora, while Jerry searches for his particular question, do you mind if I start asking you?

Jhudora: Alright.

Ghost: How do you feel about the recent events that happened in Faerieland?

Jhudora: I taught Xandra the spell. *Cackle* —I mean, I think all the faeries being turned to stone was terrible. ... Too bad that goody two-shoes Illusen didn’t stay petrified...

Ghost: Um... Next subject.

Roberta: *Pulls out notebook and writes something on it*

Ghost: Oh, good, you’re writing down the answers.

Me: Ah ha! Found it. Here’s a good question. What past events have made you and Illusen such big enemies?

Roberta: You had to find a paper to ask the most OBVIOUS QUESTION IN THE WORLD TO ASK JHUDORA?

Jhudora: NO SHOUTING IN MY BLUFF! ONLY I’M ALLOWED TO DO THAT OR I’LL TURN YOU INTO A—

Roberta: Stink beetle. Yeah yeah yeah, I’ve heard it before. *Rolls eyes*

Me: Can you please answer the question, Jhudora?

Jhudora: Yes. And I was actually going to say meowclops, not stink beetle.

Roberta: She’s definitely been hanging out with Sophie.

Jhudora: What past events? Haven’t you read the news, kid? I’ve had plenty of interviews, but I’m not going to tell a nosy knight. Especially from Meridell. What happened between me and that Cucumber-head is between me and her and you should keep your nose out of it!

Me: So what if I’m from Meridell? I have nothing to do with Illusen personally!

Reggie: Actually, she’s a good friend of ou—

Ghost: *Covers Reggie’s mouth* Um, heh heh, as he was saying, Roberta is a good friend of ours.

Roberta: *Nods* Yes! Not like Illusen’s ever cheered me up a half a dozen times when I had a bad day! And helped me and Tor when—

Me: Ahem!

Roberta: Oops. Can I have a quest? I collect stuff like the prizes you give out, you know.

Me: Roberta!

Roberta: I mean... *Grabs paper* Uh... Bad question, bad question... ah, here’s a good one. Why do you like purple so much? Everyone knows violet is better.

Ghost: She calls THAT a good question?

Jhudora: Purple is darker. It’s more evil. *Laughs evilly*

Roberta: Geez. Why’d ya do that? Everyone knows your evil. You don’t have to prove it by laughing. She’s going to be the next Darkest Faerie, I’m telling you guys.

Me: *Grabs paper* Let’s not make predictions today, and just do our job and split. What's the most evil deed you've ever done that you're proud of?

Roberta: Huh, some question. Not!

Jhudora: That's easy to answer. But I'm not going to tell you, because if Fyora finds out I'll be locked up in Faerieland prison. And I'll personally see to it that you'll all go with me for making it happen. So I'll just say this: Turning Illusen into a mortog on April first.

Roberta: Mortog?!

Me: I thought your tragedy was slorgs.

Roberta: Ugh! Don't even say the word! I still have nightmares from it!

Jhudora: Yes, being a slorg suits you well, princess.

Roberta: ...Um... is that a compliment?

Me: Doesn't matter. We still have a few questions to ask you, Jhudora, and...

Jhudora: I tire of your presence. Leave! Before I do it forcefully.

Roberta: No problem! We'll be gone before the next time you blink!

Me: No we won't. *Sigh* And yet again we get kicked out before I can finish all my questions.

Jhudora: *Picks up her wand* I don't have time for this. Unless you want a quest, begone!

Reggie: *Standing behind me* Jerry, the scary lady is scaring me!

Roberta: Me too!

Me: How about you, Ghost?

Ghost: Not really. But I don't want to be turned into a petpet either. Out we go!

Me: I still want my questions answered.

Roberta: Then come back next time alone at your own risk. *Runs out the door*

Me: Roberta! Look out! We're in a--

CRASH!

Me: ...Very high tree...

Ghost: Good thing we're so close to the Healing Springs.

Me: Let's get out of here.

The three of us got onto our Unis and flew back into Faerieland. And for those of you who are wondering, Roberta is fine; she landed on a branch next to The Discarded Magical Blue Grundo Plushie of Prosperity, though we had to get a ladder to get her down.

We returned to Meridell, Roberta left for Brightvale, Ghost went north to his home in Terror Mountain, so I have to write the summary alone. *Looks at Roberta's notes* This isn't the interview! It's a list of fruits and vegetables!

Reggie: *Holds up paper and yellow crayon* I wrote the interview!

Intervoo with Joodora

*Sigh* I'm going to be busy writing this with ink and correcting the spelling mistakes... if I can read it... Well, thanks for reading, everyone!

Comments are welcome, and maybe even a few suggestions as to who Jerry should interview next... *Wink*

 
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